A/N: Please check it out and tell me what you think
Disclaimer: SM- she wouldn't give me full rights, so I just skim off the top- taking what I can lol.
Her cheeks were flushed a pink tint, I leaned towards her staring into her curious eyes; I felt disgusted. Ten volts of electricity raked through my cells, bleaching them, I felt like I was on fire!
There were many floral scents floating on the air, a firm indication spring had sprung; maybe there was hope for sunshine in this dreary dull town, but not for me. Wettest place in the continental US, under a constant presence of cloud cover.
I walked by with my hands in my coat, every now and again they would ball into tight fists. My sunglasses shaded me from the purple bruises lingering beneath my eye. It was an accessory, though I could not define it as inconspicuous or conspicuous prop. Right now though, it was okay; as long as I noticed nothing.
As my pace slowed, I took a deep breath. Approaching the deserted bench, I pondered my existence and my options. When my body touched the wet seat, I did not flinch, only settling myself against its embrace more securely; surely this solid object could hold me,couldn't it?
My eyes closed tightly, letting each memory saturate me; each and every repulsive sick feeling coursed through me in constant processon causing me convulse and cringe physically and within. Curling up, the movements I made felt disconnected from my skeleton. A lifeless creature.
Time did not cease as I laid there, it passed uneasily like strained beats of a flaying pulse, just as bitterly heart wrenching as the one before. Desperation to sleep, to dream called to me but it was impossible to do, in the state I was in.
I squinted into the darkness, not really seeing anything; I was sure if I looked properly I would recognise the beauty before me, but all I thought of was nothing. Tapping my fingers against my side, brought no feeling; the overwhelming urge to cry swept me like the eruption of a dormant volcano, but no lava came just a few hints of ashes.
Was it better to feel nothing? Or the writhing pain? Which one was worse? Something told me to have no emotions was more dangerous, more fatalistic and devastating than the other. So I clung to my current perch, but that was all it was; you couldn't be sure if you could hang on there long enough. How long before you slipped and fell, plunging into the silent abyss.
No sound, no prayer, who would come for you?
A light wind caressed my face; it was uncomfortable. It reminded me of a hesitant touch; it was soft but it carried a chilling edge. Brushing away gently, whispering anxiously. I took my two stone hands and wrapped them around my still body.
Cowardly denying reflection; refusing to remember. Nothing I had truly belonged to me anymore, nothing I had was truly mine. My fair translucent skin was a mark of this; I was not the same. This thought burned at my insides adding to the inferno.
The sides of my lips moved up, attempting to mouth something but they slumped under the sheer weight. A strange noise pierced the air, it was muffled and strangled, agony identifiable in it. I sat up quickly, the bench wobbled a bit beneath me; a squelching sound was made as I planted my feet on the ground, my eyes scanning the vicinity.
The noise of the cars on the road were faint, I glanced around panicky, my hands gripping the edge of the seat. It was closer than I thought, I held my breath/as if that would help. The sound seemed to decrease, clamping my fingers over my mouth, I released that, the noise was coming...escaping from me.
I recoiled in shock, I was-am... sobbing. I remained in this state for about half an hour, not changing positions. As I grew calmer, my breathing stabilized, though it was slightly ragged. Pinching the bridge of my nose, I shook my clouded head.
Daybreak would be coming soon; I say there was about another four to five hours of solitude left before it arrived. Resting my weary self-back onto what was essentially my bed for the night; I awaited it, my darker hell.
Pressing my back against it, ideas floated into my head and disappeared. There was no possible way to fight it; I simply had to deal with it. It was so clear-
"Jasper, are you okay? Calm down, it is fine; I won't hurt you" she soothed; her voice was gentle as she tried to hide her perplexed tone. Her face was breath taking, but her expression did not depict it; she bit down on her bottom lip as her eyebrows pulled together.
Then her face took on this - what I imagined dream like quality; it was as if she was present but translucent as if she may evaporate at any moment, my tarnished company coveted her. To reach out and grab her, make her mine. As if she knew this, she looked at me with alarmed pupils, honing in on mine.
She set off to run, I ached to follow her, chase her to the ends of the earth. However, I remained ruing my existence, doomed to be a lonely wonderer on the streets and pavements of earth, of infinity.
It hurt again, when that weird sensation pricked at my eyes. The sky was becoming clearer, maybe we would experience some sunshine after all, it was a probability, but I could not be sure. You would think years of living here would give me a handle on the dreadful weather and that same precedence over the weather girl, but sadly no. The unpredictability was almost as high as my own.
I frowned into the light, which heralded another long boring day to be endured. I preferred the nighttime, I could let the darkness have me; intertwining and enveloping me in its blanket.
I sighed and sat up, staring out onto the landscape; the green was fresh but sort of sickly looking. Maybe I needed better glasses I chuckled to myself. Pulling my scarf from my pocket, I tied it around my neck tightly and pulled my hood up over my hat. I still did not trust the weather report.
A piece of paper blew towards me, I realised it was a newspaper. I picked it up, it was the front cover dated today. Straight way my eyes absorbed the picture – the woman with dark brown hair and sodt brown eyes.
My mouth pooled with a thick substance, I craved to pounce and attack. My mouth was open bearing my teeth, snarls ripped from my body.
A/N: Again please review, it may convince SM to hand it over... (laughs)okay fine we all know that will never happen so... at least help her convince it's good lol.