Disclaimer : I don't own twilight its all Stephanie Meyer I just like to play with them.

The story was brought back from punctuation abyss by the brilliant beta frosted cullen

Bella and Edward have been together 10 months

Set 4 months after the prom in twilight

At end of twilight all same

No new moon no birthday party

The Party

Tick-tock, tick-tock.
Thump, thump, thump.
Every second, every heartbeat I knew that I was missing made me want to run back to her.
Emmett thought, damn it! I hadn't even said anything.
Jasper was laughing yet again at the "tension" levels I was now giving off; it was something that now occurred every time I thought too much about Bella. My family, especially Jazz, found it embarrassingly amusing, even Carlisle didn't bother to hide his entertainment at my so called surge of 'seventeen year old' hormones. So here I was in hell being tortured and missing Bella.
We sat around the forest edge chatting, apparently enjoying the peace without the girls. Jasper lounged lazily as I perched an a convenient boulder, Emmett sat on the edge of the cliff legs swaying trying to think of a way to push me off; it still astound me that after all these years he still over looked my gift.
"It isn't going to happen. I can hear you" I grinned smugly.
"Well stop listening" he quipped, plastering a huge grin on his face "It can't be thaaaat haaaaard".
With that both he and Jazz were rolling around in fits at yet another of their sexual innuendos. Why must I be the butt of all there jokes?
I skulked off into the woods closing them out as best as I could. I let my senses pan out trying to pick up a scent, but I couldn't focus. I missed Bella. Her scent torturous but amazing, her smooth, soft, warm skin. She had looked so beautiful before I left this morning. She was asleep. Her kissable lips pouted, hair splayed wild across her pillow. My groin throbbed thinking of her, it was becoming unbearable.
Bella had been dreaming of me again last night, again I ended up in the rocker the other side of the room practically cowering. What was wrong with me? This was what guys dreamed of, hoped for; unfortunately I did actually know this; I had to live through fantasy after fantasy of Bella in the males at schools heads. A torturous process in itself but Bella was with me. She chose me. It was a thought I consoled myself with many, many times.
But I could still hurt her, break her. After ten months of being together this still terrified me. We had an intense relationship. We both wanted forever. We knew that and our feelings had progressed in accordance to that. Though the many, many years of self restraint I had helped me deal with the unfamiliar urges, Bella struggled.
My reasons of keeping her safe, of not hurting her, were no longer adequate.
She was very frustrated and any contact between us seemed to add to that.
As I held her last night whilst she slept her dreams took their most recent turn; she had whimpered my name, rubbed her ass into my groin and again I was solid. My eyes back to black. At first I didn't know why they did this, I felt no thirst. It didn't take long to find out. During a mortifying conversation with Carlisle he explained that the strong emotions of love, lust and sexual urges Bella had invoked made me look like the black eyed monster that lurked deep within me. It was a face I didn't want Bella to see. Me, The Monster. I had constantly fought to overcome it since the first day I met her.
Bella had tried to assure me I didn't look the same but I still worried.
Bella had let out a sigh and rolled onto her back in slumber, she stretched out her hands searching for me, she had sighed deeply relaxing back in to slumber. I could smell her arousal building as her little noises and small moans started. "Now Edward" she cooed, stirring in her sleep.
I was frustrated for the billionth time that this was the only person's thoughts I couldn't hear.
"Please", her little hips wiggled moving the sheet; she had nibbled seductively on her full bottom lip. I had watched its colour intensify barley acknowledging the rapid increase of my breathing. "Touch me please", her little hand slid into her panties and she moaned out as she reached her warmth, she wriggled under her touch knocking the sheet out of the way, revealing her wet panties. I audibly groaned as her overwhelming scent smashed into me in waves, with each intimate movement Bella made I tried in vain not to watch. But…well.
She breathed heavily, groaning in satisfaction as her fingers slid into her wet core. The heat, the scent, drew me in. I wanted to be closer, I wanted to be the one touching her, I wanted to gently wake her and take her how she wanted me too. I wanted to love her, truly give myself to her, but like a coward I didn't move. "Edward" she had moaned as she came; her liquids slid to the sheet as she snuggled back into the bed. I had laid her sheet back over her "thanx" she had sighed still half asleep. I had gently kissed her forehead; "I'm sorry" I had whispered, wishing yet again I could be good enough for Bella to deserve her, to be human enough for her. "S'okay I love you" Bella had mumbled as I sat back in the rocker.
We didn't really talk about the new turn Bella's dreams had taken. I didn't want to embarrass her and she hadn't brought it up. I didn't blame her for releasing her "tension". I knew it built up; god did I know; I used to smell it in the air when I would return after I had been away overnight hunting, then she started to do it in the shower when I would leave to get showered and fresh clothes on. I would hear her if I got back early.
Now its started happening at night, she knew about it sometimes; she woke up more often, sometimes I stayed other times I'd go run or wander the house.
The dreams were just a physical reaction to her tension.
I knew she wanted me to fulfil her dreams and was patiently putting up with my overbearing protectiveness until I could. I should be fulfilling them, I would fulfil them. I would touch her in the ways she wanted me to. I was sure I could, and I would. Once I'd been hunting.
I had left her a note and ran home happy. Decided.
Mountain lion. I snapped back from my reminiscing to the forest that surrounded me, I blurred threw the trees snaking between them as the scent pulled me onward, the pulsing pounding heartbeat in my ears. I took to the trees silently gaining the higher ground as my pray groomed after its own hunt. I pounced and sunk my teeth into the jugular; the burn in my throat soothing as I drained it quickly. Soon it ran dry and with my thirst satisfied I pushed it aside and sat thinking.
I could do it; I could control myself to please Bella. I had controlled my thirst with her for ten months. I had tasted her blood when sucking out James's venom and hadn't been overcome. We had been through so much; I couldn't not give her this. What a hypocrite I am. I want her to have her human experiences; I can't pick and choose the ones that she wants; it's natural for her to want this. Scary, but natural for her to want physical progression in our relationship, to have that human experience. No-one else was going to be with Bella, only me. I could do it, control myself to be with her in a way to please her. I would intimately touch her; I touch her all the time; maybe I could have sex, ok well maybe that would be pushing it but I could try. I grinned thinking of my hands replacing Bella's caressing her.
"Why the determination bro" Jazz said coming through the clearing, making me jump.
"Hahahahahaha" Emmett bellowed I rolled my eyes.
"Distracted? That's not like you. What's up?"
"Just making some choices" I answered indifferently as he stepped forward tasting my emotions grinning.
"Oh I see", 'nervous, tense, lustful, jealous, determined' he thought at me.
I suddenly seemed to find the ground fascinating rather than look at them.
"I need a favour. I need some… umm… help" I peeped up at them; this was going to be bad, they were both grinning wickedly.
"Sure. What is it?" Jazz said.
"I'm not telling you now. You'll find out later" their minds ran over many scenarios both terrifying and disturbing.
"No probs" they said in sync.
I would go shopping later while I knew Bella would be helping Jess sort her birthday party. Alice and Rose would be going and they wouldn't even know we were back yet; well except Alice.
"Come on. We need to hunt more, Jazz especially".
"Why? I've been doin' really well" Jazz was instantly defensive, 'I haven't been tempted at all lately, I've been really resisting, lasting longer. Even with Bella in the house'.
"Relax; we're just going to the party tonight. I want to go back this evening. We'll go through Port Angeles", I darted into the woods until their teasing thoughts faded.

'Urgh', I stretched out and woke up. Too warm, way to warm. And wet. God not again. So, I'd humiliated myself in front of my abstinent boyfriend; he wasn't even here, did I terrify him into running? I rolled over in my too warm clammy bed and found his note by my pillow.


Its Saturday sleep in, my heart needs its rest if it's going to be busy partying tonight. Don't let Alice torture you to much, have fun and enjoy yourself. I want every human experience ticked off.

Forever my heart and soul


PS. They have been hiding what your sexy costume is, I want to see it. I'm back Sunday night.

It drives me nuts how effortless Edward is, how incredibly amazing. He brought out feelings in me I hadn't ever felt before. That first day when my eyes met his across the cafeteria, my tummy fluttered, my knees went weak and I felt a surge of desire and wanting I'd never felt before. Of course Edward puts that down to him being a vampire; but I knew better.
I flopped back dejectedly and saw it was eleven o clock. I was to keen to get this day over with. Charlie would be staying in La Push for a weekend of fishing but I already felt uneasy. I wanted it to be Sunday night already, so he would creep in my window and encase me in his cold arms, chaste kisses and his seductive scent; with a deep sigh I headed into the shower, music blaring from my iPod.
Apparently; according to Edward, everyone had one. He gave it to me with our favourites and many more already on it; it now sat in one of the docks that had started appearing over the house much to Charlie's amusement.
When a new "gift" appeared I tended to scowl at it for a couple of days before actually using it. Edward refused to comment how fancy stereo equipment first turned up next to my bed, then in the bathroom and then the kitchen and then in my truck. He had looked mildly amused when I threatened to run over the next gift that mysteriously tuned up with said truck. He merely quipped that I should act with caution in case Charlie 'brought me home a puppy'.
The smart ass.
A fit of giggles broke me from my thoughts of that smart yet incredibly sexy ass. I wrenched back the shower curtain to see Alice dancing around my bathroom, slipping and sliding on the steam soaked lanolin laughing her head off.
"Having fun Alice?"
"Yep. You?" she said with a knowing wink.
"I was, 'til I was interrupted", I grabbed my towel turning off the shower.
Alice had seen me in various stages of undress before; her being my best friend. It has never bothered me and was very helpful after the James incident; it saved Charlie from having to help his mature daughter shower. She was a blessing.
I dawdled to my bedroom; Alice was sat next to my assigned outfit like a proud P.T.A mum. I pulled on my new outfit without complaint; this was a newly found skill that Alice loved. I didn't complain at a new outfit appearing on my bed or about the continuous turn over of my wardrobe; no matter how annoying it was when I went to wear something that had been taken and deemed by Alice to old to be seen in, tired or out of date. Today's outfit was a pair of skinny jeans, a long vest top and black flats. They would have been heels; Alice had once insisted that the more I wear heels the easier I would have found them to walk in; yeah right! She finally listened to reason when Edward pointed out that as a human I feel pain. Attending school in five inch stilettos would cause me more than a little discomfort and he had thus forbid it. Thank god! Alice then styled my hair into two thick boho fishtail plaits and I was ready for the day ahead; she had roped us into helping Jess set up her house for the fancy-dress party themed "SEXXXXXXXXXXXXXY".
"Bella" Alice cooed as we sped to Jess's house in her scarily fast yellow Porsche; an anniversary present from Jasper.
"Yes Alice" I replied cautiously; she was looking too innocent for my liking.
"I left your costume in a bag on your bed".
"Oh. Okay, umm thank you. I thought I was getting ready with you and Rosalie" I muttered confused.
"Don't worry I'll meet you at the party" she took a quick glance at me.
"Alice what's going on? Tell me or I'm sitting at home eating Ben and Jerry's until Edward gets back".
A smile tugged at the edges of her lips.
"Stop fussing. It'll be fine. You'll have a great time. Boundaries will be getting blurred tonight. It will be good".
Alice busied herself with the radio as I frantically tried to control my breathing. The only thing I ever worried about when it came to Alice's visions was her 'seeing' Edward and me. Although unavoidable I still found it weird that Alice was more likely to know the night I'm intimate with Edward before me.
The decision making was all up to him. I was ready. He knew I was ready. It seemed every Cullen family member knew I was ready.
But no matter how ready I was, it meant nothing until Edward was ready. Being physical with me terrified him more than anything. Me in my fragile breakable state. He was so worried about losing control. So many things could go wrong. My blood; a constant draw; but my body… I bruise easily under his gentlest grip. He could kill me accidentally, so easily.
"So he might be ......."
She sighed looking at me quickly, "I don't know. I'm not sure. Maybe. I don't know. Sorry. His hormonal mind keeps changing. Just relax tonight and have fun okay".
Easy for her to say.
We pulled into Jess's drive to find banners, streamers and tear stained Jess in full panic mode and its only one o clock. We rushed to her aid and between sobs and hysteric's gathered that nothing was done or ready in the house and the party started at eight; seven hours to go. How long could it take to hang some banners? Alice automatically turned into a force that would rival some dictators; though she conveniently avoiding rooms Jess was in. She moaned about human speed because decorating took so much longer. Even so by five the house was filled with balloons, streamers, banners, twinkling lights, a dance area and the kitchen resembled a cross between a frat party and a cocktail bar.
The fridge was filled with layers of jello shots, on the side a water melon sat innocently amongst bottles and bottles of various booze, beers, soft drinks and sodas. Alice had created an elaborate display on the island with bowls of skittles separated by colour and stands filled with brightly coloured sealed test tubes containing cocktails; she had written drink recipes on the blackboard where Jess's mum's shopping list had been. Oops! Never mind.
When Jess came down she looked like the un-holiest nun I'd ever seen. As Alice headed to her house to meet Rosalie, Jess and I headed to mine so I could change. Jess planed to grab Angela and do a last minute dash to the store for essentials.
I grabbed the scary little bag Alice had left for me on my bed turning out the contents; it wasn't that bad, bar the tiny red underwear, amazing as they were, there's not a chance I would be wearing them. I raided the hat box in my wardrobe I'd taken to hiding all my unworn sexy undies in; all forced upon me by Alice mainly, Renee embarrassingly and even Rosalie had warmed to me enough to find giving me skimpy underwear acceptable. It seemed the majority of the Cullen's are all in for the corrupt Edward Anthony Mason Cullen campaign. I could only thank god that Carlisle and Esme have yet to give me a gift wrapped thong. I settled on a pair of sexy zebra print with a red hem from Rosalie; the bra was cute and gave me quite a good cleavage with French knickers that showed a bit of cheek. I stashed Alice's red lace combo and hid the box back in my wardrobe where it was hopefully safe from my nosy boyfriend who doesn't sleep; I didn't know if he would have a good rummage; and an equally inquisitive sister who is less than subtle about her rummaging. I'm just grateful I stopped writing diaries years ago.
I slipped into a tiny navy-blue pleated skirt that sat low on my hips and barely below my butt meaning bending was gonna be revealing; and Alice had picked a thong for me! She was having a laugh! I added the too tight white shirt, knee high socks and court shoes I looked the part indeed. I undid my hair and tied it in pigtails that loosely curled as my phone rang.
"I like the zebra print better" she cooed.
"Hi Alice" I said rolling my eyes.
"I really do".
"Stop watching me".
"It just happened".
"Yeah right" I snapped.
"Have fun at the store with Jess and Angela", and the phone died, I put on my make up feeling guilty. I hated snapping at Alice, I just missed Edward. I just wanted to mope with ice-cream. Once I looked in the mirror I felt that twinge of nervous excitement that he wasn't here and I could dress up sexily and go a little crazy out with the girls; not that my annoyingly moral abstinent vampire boyfriend would ever tell me what to do or wear. He'd just stand there like a frozen Popsicle, avoiding my eyes, wearing a mask of neutral emotion; petrified I'd touch him or try to break one of his precious boundaries.
After numerous squeals and giggles from Jess we grabbed the sexy cop - aka Angela - and headed to the store.
"What are we doing here" I hissed, pleased that Angela was as red as me as me. We stood looking at a rather intimidating wall stocked with so many contraceptive products; its size resembled that of the Great Wall of China.
"I need help" Jess pouted innocently. So this is why we drove to Port Angeles.
"Help?" Angela hissed. I'm not sure if she was replying to Jessica or asking for someone to save her; I think it was the latter.
"So your first thought was of the only two virgins in the school? What help can we offer?" I frantically whispered at her. I grew steadily more crimson as I started to hear laughter in the closer aisles.
"Oh. My. God. People are laughing at us!"
"Don't be ridiculous" Jess spat.
"Says the person who can't buy Johnnies alone!" I through back. I took a deep steadying breath "Sorry. What's the problem? I'm sure we can theoretically help. I mean it can't be that ha.... ummm difficult" I sympathised. I was glad I still had a pack under my mattress; Renee had forced them upon me, Trojan ribbed apparently.
"There's so many" Jess whispered.
"What did you do last time?" Angela squeaked, looking like she might actually faint.
"I...I...didn't. I had to go to the clinic for emergency contraception the morning after" Jess stammered.
"Didn't they give you some there? They're always handing them out".
"Well. Yeah… but Mike and Tyler had a water fight with them".
"Oh!" Crap! I can do this. Just switch to auto pilot. I've had Sex-Ed. I stared at the shelves; ribbed teat, smooth, textured, tingle, cooling, Trojan, petite. Oh you've gotta be kidding me! "Right. If we are going to your party we gotta pick. So… umm… Well… umm… What… umm Size… range are we looking at cause that can limit your choice". I don't wanna know this!
"He's no Trojan" she grinned.
"Right, so regular or petit?" I giggled. Angela also managed to be grinning widely.
"Umm… How important is getting the right size?" Jess blushed.
"It could come off" Ang hissed much to the other shopper's amusement.
"Umm… We'll go regular".
"Right. So you have umm… tingle lube, cool, heat, spermicidal… eww".
"You're good at this Bells. Sure you weren't lying? Is Edward a Trojan boy?" she grinned.
"No Jess. I'm just reading the boxes. You learnt to read in kindergarten right? I'm still just as frustrated as ever". Someone was rolling in the aisles behind us at this.
"Didn't you try the shower thing? Really the pulse setting is good".
"Yes Jess. Shut up! I don't want to talk about it in a store", oh crap someone is really getting a laugh out of this! Please kill me or the ground swallow me up. "I'm never coming here again" I sighed.
She mumbled something that sounded like "maybe flavoured".
"Huh" I should have been listening.
"For you know…" Well no I was barely listening to her.
"You're kidding me Bella! How far have you gone with him?"
"Kissing. Like first base", I cringed awaiting the onslaught. I mean the guy didn't even let his hands wander as he kissed me; a gentle stroke of my arms was a leap for Edward.
"What!" they hollered.
"What?" I hissed "It isn't my choice".
"Bella, I may still be a virgin but even I've left the home plate. I thought Ben had self control! Edwards in a whole new league! He should join a convent or become a monk. How do you stand it?" Angela asked wide eyed.
"I had a three hour shower yesterday" I cringed as the aisle with the laugher was roaring now and I was beet red.
"Aww" they soothed sympathetically, patting my shoulders. "Poor Bells" they were unable to shake of my feelings of rejection though.
"Maybe you should get him to come to the party. You look hooowwt"
"He's hiking".
"He always goes hiking. He should go to a party with you, you always look sexy and have fun" Angela pressed.
"Yeah, but I'd hike too after ten months of first base".
With that I grabbed an insulting pack of condoms and trust them at her, "that should help the one minute wonder and he might just fill them out".
To the sound of hysterics in the next aisle I stormed out to the car, eager to escape supermarket hell. A few minutes later a sorry looking Jess and Angela came to join me. It was now seven forty five. Great we had run out of time. Jess was late for her own party.

As we pulled into the store Jasper and Emmett looked totally bewildered. I led them straight to the back of the store; to the pharmacy section and stopped in front of a wall of contraceptives. When I looked at them they both had identical expressions; their jaws hanging open looking vaguely like goldfish.
"I thought you might have some idea what I might need".
'But there's so many' Emmett thought.
"Why....um...so....you" Jazz spluttered.
I tensely pinched the bridge of my nose, "I'm trying to think ahead. It's not a big deal. Please don't make it a big deal. I'm thinking of Bella. I need to protect her".
"Ed" Emmett beamed 'are you planning something?'
'Bella's gonna get some' Jazz thought.
"I have to take a measure of protection to make sure none of my venom gets near Bella's blood" I whispered so quiet only they could hear.
"Why would she be bleeding?" Emmett thought and voiced at the same time.
"Emmett… It's her first time. She's so petit and fragile, there's bound to be some discomfort".
"Just pre heat the oven man! It's called foreplay. Haven't you ever read Cosmo?"
Jazz nodded franticly, "the girls leave them everywhere, seriously the ones in the garage...." their minds flashed over multiple positions and techniques.
"Stop! Stop! Not helping! I don't need tips on techniques thanks. I hear enough in people's thoughts already"; I tried to push them from my mind until they stopped; "just help me pick some guys and leave what they're for to me to worry about".
"You are worrying about it. I can feel it" Jazz grinned and a wall of calm washed over me.
"Thanks, but that's not going to help at the time is it... you aren't invited".
Jasper grinned menacingly and thought 'I don't know the woods come in very close we could annoy you without Bella even knowing... hmm. I wonder what she would think if you left mid way to go deal with your brothers'.
I hissed quietly at him.
'Or I could send waves of such doubt and fear over you you'll never rise to the occasion' he teased.
"Shut up Jazz".
'I think they're at the back' Jessica's thoughts boomed at me. I was becoming far too aware of her 'voice' from 'watching' Bella; surely she should be at her party.
"Come on Jessica Stanley is heading this way", I said and we all walked slightly quicker than human speed down an aisle of cleaning products, peering between the shelves to see Jess, Angela, and Bella stop exactly where we were a minute ago.
'Oh god. No', was all I could think as I took in their outfits at the same time as my brothers.
'Ha, ha, ha Bella's hoooowwwwt when Eddy's away!' Emmett thought, promptly followed by 'Thank god I hunted! Look at Bella's panties' from Jazz.
I shot them death glares. "I'll ignore that Emmett! And Alice will kill you for thinking that Jasper" I spat icily.
Inside I was praying Jasper wasn't sensing how aroused I was from seeing Bella in what looked like a school uniform that should be illegal! Her skirt is so short as she leans forward slightly her panties show, her ass juts out sexily and her socks are pulled up past her knees with court shoes. Ugh, seeing her wasn't helping the growing arousal problem I was having; but a party dressed like that, mixed with alcohol and buying condoms?! What's my girlfriend doing? She thinks I'm away. Bella wasn't a big drinker; we've been together ten months and I've never seen her drink, but then she does wait 'til I'm away to go to clubs or parties.
"Chill or I'm gonna implode from your emotional overload" Jazz hissed.
I ignored him.
Bella was bright red and Angela was on the verge of a panic attack; her thoughts so focused on what Bella was saying, "So your first thought was of the only two virgins in the school? What help can we offer?"
I was floored. Emmett was in fits, 'they aren't the only virgins don't forget Eddy and I'm sure that Yorkie kid aren't popped it yet'.
Jazz was silently creasing.
"Oh my god people are laughing at us" Bella squealed.
I kicked Emmett in the shin.
"Don't be ridiculous" Jess spat but her thoughts were a blurry mess of confusion and embarrassment.
Bella was apologising for something I missed.
"There's so many" Jess paled.
"What did you do last time?" Angela said, actually swaying; I was worried she might faint.
Jess was muttering about not having used anything and going to a clinic for a pill. I did feel bad for her. Her thoughts revealed how they had been drinking and Mike kept on till she caved to go the whole way only to revel he had no protection. She then had to go to a clinic for emergency contraception the next day. What a cad! I hated Mike now more than ever. Hormone filled idiot.
Jess was telling Angela about how the condoms the clinic supplied were used as weapons in a water fight between Mike and Tyler. What on earth? And Jess wants a repeat performance? Is she mad?
'Cool idea' Emmett was thinking about grabbing some himself and forming a tactical plan of attack.
"Oh!" Bella looked horrified but determined, "Right. If we are going to your party we gotta pick. So… umm… Well… umm… What… umm Size… range are we looking at cause that can limit your choice". Bella looked so uncomfortable, I wanted to soothe her, wrap her in my arms and... Focus.
"She's asking the size of Mike's dick".
"I got that Emmett" I whispered, his thoughts were having a field day. I didn't envy Mike being at school on Monday.
"He's no Trojan" Jess grinned.
Emmett, Jasper and I were in hysterics.
"Right, so regular or petit?" Bella giggled.
"Umm… How important is getting the right size?" Jess blushed as she thought of how it was over so quick she wasn't sure.
"It could come off" Angela hissed, Emmett was clinging to his sides through his hysterical fits.
"Umm… We'll go regular" Jess replied.
"Right. So you have umm… tingle lube, cool, heat, spermicidal… eww".
"You're good at this Bells. Sure you weren't lying? Is Edward a Trojan boy?" she grinned.
Jazz and Emmett were on the floor as I stood frozen in horror. How could a trip to the store go so wrong? Humans do it all the time!
"No Jess. I'm just reading the boxes. You learnt to read in kindergarten right? I'm still just as frustrated as ever" Bella spat obviously annoyed at the subject change. Emmett and Jazz were still on the floor. Words and thoughts intangible. I felt I might faint. Can vampires faint?
"Didn't you try the shower thing? Really the pulse setting is good".
"Yes Jess. Shut up! I don't want to talk about it in a store", Emmett was howling with laughter, 'Bella's getting her own' his only clear thought.
"I'm never coming here again" Bella sighed, obviously no longer paying attention. "Maybe flavoured" Jess suggested as she thought of an act that they could benefit; and might I say 'ewww'. Not a thought I want to ever see again.
"Huh?" Bella jumped slightly as Jess broke her from her daze.
"For you know…"
"Huh?" Bella looked beet red and a little lost.
"You're kidding me Bella! How far have you gone with him?"
"Kissing. Like first base", Bella shrunk.
Em and Jazz sat up with inhuman speed to look at me in utter astonishment, 'I thought you'd done something!'
"What!" they hollered making us all jump; and us being three vampires that's no easy feat.
"What? It isn't my choice".
Em and Jazz were shaking their heads at me while mentally screaming, 'Prude, Wimp, Scaredy cat, but really… are you gay? Shell stray? Are you blind? Look at her! Hot! Smoking hot. Human and smoking hot!' I growled deeply.
"Bella, I may still be a virgin but even I've left the home plate. I thought Ben had self control! Edwards in a whole new league! He should join a convent or become a monk. How do you stand it?"
Emmett went back to laughing and Bella back to beet red.
"I had a three hour shower yesterday".
Bella was cringing, Emmett hysterical and I was being overcome by immeasurable guilt.
My fear of being intimate with Bella to protect her had hurt her anyway; not physically but I had denied her what she craved. I felt so ashamed Jasper gave me a sympathetic smile as he felt the guilty and shame roll off of me.
"Aw, Poor Bells" they tried to sooth her but I could see the feelings of rejection I invoked "Maybe you should get him to come to the party. You look hooowwt".
I couldn't agree more. I adored Bella. I loved her she always looked beautiful to me; even in holey sweats; but I'd never seen her like this. The tiny blue skirt that kept flashing her panties; zebra print and sexy as hell; a tiny white shirt, as she moved the matching bra showed clearly through the taut patches, high socks. It was defiantly bringing out the seventeen year old in me. My cock was solid and I was thankful for the long shirt.
"He's hiking" Bella replied sadly.
"He always goes hiking. He should go to a party with you, you always look sexy and have fun" Angela pressed her thoughts flashed over numerous nights out they had had. Bella always looking incredible, dancing, drinking and having fun. Acting like a typical eighteen year old.
"Yeah, but I'd hike too after ten months of first base" Jess gloated.
Bella looked furious. She grabbed a pack of condoms and trust them at Jess, "that should help the one minute wonder and he might just fill them out" Bella hissed then stormed down the next aisle. The pack stated petite desensitising and even I couldn't hold back my laughter at the mortified expression Jess had.
As soon as they were past the doors I grabbed a pack and made my way quickly to the register, where my choice was deemed impressive and thoughtful, as to why I have no idea.
I sunk into my car putting my purchase in the glove box and allowed the music to sooth my anxiety. This was actually probably the one time I wished I could use alcohol to lower my inhibitions but then that wouldn't really help with the control issues.



I'm so excited! I'm glad you're doing this. It will be perfect. Don't worry. It all works out for the best. Your costumes are in your rooms. Have fun!


Jasper and Emmett returned, collapsing into my car with several bags loaded up in there arms; both blocking their thoughts. I drove quickly back to Forks at speeds that would terrify Bella.
"Alice sent me a text. We have to stop by the house to change; our clothes are in our rooms".
We all exchanged nervous glances as we pulled into the garage and made our way to our rooms. Jasper's mind boggled at the red and white Santa suite with matching hat and beard, but Emmet was thrilled at his Hugh Heffner silk pyjamas and housecoat. I looked down on the outfit laid out for me; there was a grey wife beater with baggy pants and braces and a large jacket. As I stuck the red plastic helmet on my head Emmett and Jazz burst into my room. Jasper looked traumatised. Emmett thrilled. They raked over my costume, "Fire-fighter. Good choice" Emmett nodded in approval.
"I'll be sure to thank Alice".
We promptly drove to Jessica's house which was pumping with music. Jazz was only looking slightly calmer than me as we headed into the buzzing room. It was packed. There must be the whole school here. I couldn't pick out Bella's scent through the many bodies but I knew she wasn't with my sisters, Jess or Angela from there thoughts. The guys quickly split up to find the girls as I searched desperately for Bella; she didn't even appear to be here.
"Edward, Edward" Alice bounced fluidly threw the crowd to me in a tiny elf's outfit, now I see why Jasper's Santa.
"Where's Bella? I can't find her". Alice's eyes glazed over; visions flashed across her mind of Bella sat with Tyler outside somewhere I didn't know.
"Where is she? I can't tell where that is".
"I think it's the roof".
I quickly made my way up to the roof deck of the Stanley's home and was able to identify Bella's voice threw the jumble of others, "Umm. Hi?" I muttered slightly self-conscious. Bella looked slightly shocked as she absorbed my presence then she quickly jumped up wrapping her arms around my neck. Tyler mumbled his goodbyes and quickly left.
"Why are you here? Not that I'm not pleased, but I thought you were having a boys weekend" she bit her lip anxiously.
"They're downstairs. Don't worry. They're having fun. I wanted to be back with you".

We snuck away from the party pretty quickly; although it was good to have him there, I was keen to be alone with Edward. I dropped back on to my bed as soon as we reached my room; he pulled my shoes slowly off my feet, running his cheek along my calf as he pulled off my long sock.
"You look so amazing", he nibbled his lip as he stood between my legs
"Looking pretty hot yourself!
He shrugged off his jacket and ditched his hat onto the rocker. His firm cold lips quickly took mine in a kiss that gradually deepened as his cool finger slowly trailed down my leg lifting it to his hip as he pulled my other sock off. His lips moved seductively slowly down my neck; this was most definitely past his boundary points. His fingers lightly trembled as he held my hips.
"Edward are you ok?" I whispered gently.
"Yeah. If I hurt you… or do something wrong… you'll tell me right? You would tell me if you didn't like… Or if you don't want to do something".
I looked nervously up at him, "of course I love you".
He slowly dipped down to my lips kissing me with surprising force; not hard but good, different. I felt his fingers slowly undoing my shirt buttons, my senses seemed to thaw out of there frozen shock with every button that was loosened.
I gently pulled down the braces from his shoulders then my fingers knotted in his hair gripping him to me; he moaned deeply into my mouth in response.
Shockingly quick he flipped us so he was on his back as I straddled him; I instinctively froze.
"Sorry" he whispered self-consciously.
"Don't be", I took his lips again as he slid my shirt down my arms.
It was embarrassing how quick my breathing was becoming, but his was definitely quickening as well. I looked down on his perfect face as he raked his eyes over my body; a lazy grin pulled at his lips. I tugged his grey wife beater over his head to reveal his smooth marble chest; I couldn't help but bite my lip. As he trailed his mouth over my neck his hands gripped my hips tightly before ripping my skirt in two. "Shit!" a look of panic flashed through his eyes.
"It's fine. Don't worry. It's fine. It's just a skirt" I crushed my mouth to his pulling him to me; worried he would pull away, but he didn't. He flipped me onto my back and looked down on me, his eyes were darkening with passion, "Bella are you sure you want to try this with me?"
"I want this. I want you. I only want this with you".
I popped the button of his baggy jeans, sliding them down his narrow hips and promptly to the floor to reveal his black boxers; striking in contrast to his pale skin, his very obvious hard on straining against the thin fabric.
I felt the moisture already pooling between my legs increase.
Edward's eyes were black now.
I pushed against his shoulder, returning him to his position beneath me as I gently kissed his stomach, running my tongue between the ridges of his abs, down over the v of his hips. My breath fanned across his boxers and a growl vibrated deep in his chest. As my tongue trailed the fabric covering the length of his shaft he gently unclasped my bra with trembling fingers; I let it drop to the floor. I tugged down his boxers, dropping them to the floor as I dragged my eyes over his pale statuesque body. He gently laid me back down running his mouth along my jaw, down my neck. As his cold hands gently cupped my breasts, his tongue slowly flicked across the peak of my nipple causing me to moan. He tugged my wet panties down my legs and I gasped as his cold fingers finally met my heated core; he soon had me moaning under his touch.
I could feel his mouth smile against my skin as we got lost in each others exploring caresses.
Hours must have passed; the room had begun to lighten; before I took him into my mouth. He groaned loudly as I took his impressive size deep into my mouth, swirling my tongue over him. It didn't take long for him to cum; spilling copious amounts of cold smooth liquid into my mouth. I swallowed it gladly before he gently laid me onto my back.
Sliding a condom on he pressed his tip to my entrance, "If I hurt you, we can stop".
"It's fine. I'll tell you".
As he slid slowly into me I felt so right. It didn't really hurt; it just stung a little as he pushed through my barrier. I sucked in a short breath as he started to move in and out of me steadily; it soon just started to feel good "keep going" I moaned.
Edward smiled down at me then quickly rolled us so I was on top, "I think I like this way better" he grinned. His hands firmly grasped my hips as he rocked me back and forth. "Oh god! Why did we wait to do this?" he moaned as he pulled himself up to meet my lips.
My breasts crushed into his chest as he filled and emptied my core. My body trembled, my orgasm building. I moaned as he pushed into me faster, "Harder baby! Harder!" I moaned.
"I can't. I can't hurt you" he panted through gritted teeth.
"Fuck me! Please! I need more!" I groaned.
Edward quickly turned me; my back to his chest; leaning me over the headboard. He pushed into me roughly, harder and faster than before hitting a spot inside that through me closer to the edge.
"Yes! Yes! Yes! There! Oh god" I moaned out too loudly.
"There? Is that good baby? Tell me?" Edward groaned as he pushed harder; I could tell he was close, his fingers dug into my hips as my muscles gripped him tighter.
"Yes! There! Yes! I'm coming!" waves of heat rocked my body and Edward groaned deeply with his own release.
Exhausted we both collapsed onto the bed; Edward held me tight to his chest "Did I hurt you?" he whispered gently.
"Not at all. I might have a few bruises, but you defiantly didn't hurt me".
We then lay in blissful silence as the full light of the day built in the sky.
Both of us seeming pretty pleased with ourselves...

More smutty fun to come, I like to let them have some saucy fun review review review please and ill write even quicker ;-) thanks again frosted cullen