SWAT KAT CRAZINESS
Author's Note: Just a string of crazy things that popped into my head! Hopefully, I'll think up some more soon.
NO MORE DIMENSIONAL RADAR!!!!
"Razor! Where the heck are we this time?" T-Bone growled unhappily.
"Uh, let me check!" His partner said sheepishly.
This made the tenth place they'd landed at that didn't look like home. His partner's dimensional radar was really on the fritz this time and he was fast losing his temper.
They'd landed somewhere that had dogs that weren't too friendly, another place with weird things that looked like floating bubbles with wings, yet another world that was nothing but volcanoes (that was fun) and the last one before this was a world at war between giant mice and some kind of fish. Each place was weirder and stranger than the last but none of them was home.
Suddenly Razor scrambled back into his seat. "Get airborne fast!" He shouted.
Alarming noises sounding too much like gunfire made T-Bone jerk the jet upward before it was really ready to do so.
"What the heck was that?" He shouted as he got high enough and stopped.
"These guys look like hairless cats except they didn't have whiskers or long ears. They're intelligent and modern like us but aren't too keen on anything that's looks too different from them apparently. They screamed and ran and others began yelling at me and pointing things that looked too much like our ancient guns. That's when I decided to scram." Razor panted in answer.
"Well don't look now but it looks like they have jets too!" T-Bone shouted as he went into forward motion and put on all engines.
Behind them came a pack of jets firing missiles that he did his best to evade.
"Well, time to get out of here!" Razor said unhappily as he engage his radar once more. A dizzying sensation occurred that wasn't getting any more pleasant each time they had to endure it.
When the colored bursts of light and the spinning sensation ended, T-Bone put them in a holding position and sat still until they could get their bearings once more.
Suddenly, their radio burped at them. "Hey, guys! Where the heck did you come from? You just appeared on my radar and I look up there you were." Came a very welcome and familiar voice.
"Gods Felina. Soo very glad to hear your voice." T-Bone said, very relieved.
"Oh? Sounds like you've had a bad time." She said, curiosity in her voice.
"Trust me! We have and now all we want to do is go home. We'll see you around." Razor responded.
T-Bone took that cue to head the jet back to their hangar. He'd never been so glad to see their hangar in his life as he leaped down for the first time in several hours. His legs threatened to go out from under him from sitting far too long.
"Ohh, I could use a hot bath. I'm soo stiff." He groaned.
"I don't mind a shower myself." Razor sighed as he went and changed his clothes.
"You will destroy that thing, Jake. No ifs, ands, or buts!" Chance growled in his friend's face.
"Believe me, you won't get an argument from me." Jake agreed fervently.
YOU DON'T LOOK LIKE YOURSELF!
"Look out, he's going to fire that thing!" Was the last thing Feral said before everything went to hell.
The light blasted their eyes and a feeling of wrenching occurred. When everything settled once more, things just didn't seem right.
However, before anyone could figure out what had happened, they still had Dark Kat to deal with. Why the maniac was laughing his head off could be dealt with later as well.
They charged him as one and someone managed to shock the crap out of the fool, knocking him out cold. The creeplings had flown off, thankfully.
Breathing hard, the group could finally figure out what had gone on.
"Holy shit!" Razor shouted in horror finding himself in Felina's body.
"No fucking way!" Feral barked, absolutely scandalized to learn he was in T-Bone's body.
"Well how do you think I feel!" Felina said in shock, staring down at Steele's body.
"Hey, this isn't half bad." Steele remarked studying Razor's body that he occupied.
"Arrrrgghhhh!" T-Bone screamed the second he learned he was in his worst enemy's body.
After the shock had worn off and everyone figured out who was in whose body, T-Bone snarled at his partner.
"Razor! You'd better figure out how to return us to normal, asap!"
"I may be smart, buddy but I'm not a freakin' miracle worker!" His partner snapped back, wincing at the sound of his new female voice.
"Well, there's no way we want anyone else to see us like this so you better hope you can figure it out." Feral said in T-Bone's gravely voice. It felt truly strange to be shorter than he was used to.
"What are the rest of us supposed to do?" Steele whined. Razor and T-Bone winced at hearing the smaller SWAT Kats voice sounding like that.
"Shut up Steele!" Felina growled, hating how she sounded. This male body was freaking her out.
Razor was having the same difficulty getting used to moving in a female's body. It just creeped him out. He quickly went to the device Dark Kat used and looked it over. It seemed fairly simple. He reached reflexively for something in his clothes and realized it was on his body.
"Steele get over here. I need something from my g-suit." He demanded.
Steele moved awkwardly over to him, not used to this shorter more compact body with lots of muscles, he just realized.
Razor reached into a pocket and grabbed a tool then removed the glovatrix from Steele's wrist. The last thing they needed was for the fool to shoot someone by accident.
He returned to his work. Everyone moved as little as possible, too upset and uneasy in their new bodies to dare to do much. They all focused their attention on Razor in Felina's body, holding onto their sanity while they waited impatiently.
Steele was the only one who seemed to be enjoying the body he was in as he flexed and posed in different positions.
T-Bone grimaced watching his friend's body act like that. He turned away distastefully.
"Okay, I think that's got it. Unfortunately, I can't test it to be sure so let's see what happens." Razor announced and without giving anyone a chance to object, he flicked the machine on and allowed it to spray in a circle to get all of them. He'd jumped down to the floor to be included.
That same weird sensation occurred again as well as being blinded. They waited until they could see again and looked at each other warily.
"No freakin' way!"
"Do it again, now!"
"Okay, okay, keep your shirt...uh....whatever on!"
They had been scrambled really good this time. Not only minds but clothes and everyone looked just ridiculous. Feral now wore nothing but his boxers, Felina had Razor's clothes on, T-Bone wore only boxers as did Steele, Razor had Felina's clothes on and their minds were equally switched out. No idea where the rest of their clothes had gone.
Razor, now in Steele's body turned the machine on again and held his breath.
When the chaos ended once more, no one moved. Eyes only dared to look down at themselves. A collective sigh went around the room except for Steele's faint 'aww'. Except for Steele the others lunged at the machine and tore it apart until there was nothing but little pieces left.
"I hope to hell, Dark Kat hasn't got that thing committed to memory or we'll be in deep shit and I never want to do this again." T-Bone growled.
"Amen to that." Razor said flatly. He went to Steele's side and took back the glovatrix that was still on his arm. "I'll take that!"
"Hey!" Steele complained, but everyone ignored him.
"No one tells anyone about what happened here!" Feral ordered.
"Are you kidding. I want to forget it as fast as possible." The tabby snorted in disgust.
Everyone else nodded solemnly. The SWAT Kats left for their jet and went home as fast as they could. For once, Feral called in another squad of enforcers to clean up the mess instead of overseeing it himself, they were just too freaked by what had happened.
They did, however, haul Dark Kat's just regaining conscious body back to headquarters with them. No where in his report did Feral mention the weird machine they had been subjected to.