It's been two weeks and 4 days since I first stayed at Maddie's house. Since that time, I've had 4,000 calls, and I'm not kidding, from Alice, 200 from Angela, and 10 from Jacob. No one bothered to leave me messages anymore. Texts though, that was something they never would seemingly never tire of sending. On top of all the calls from Alice, all my texts were from her as well-that's about 20 a day-in between when she's not calling. It's things like:
Dont listen 2 Edward. He wants the kid. Come back.
Edward does not hate u or the kid. he was mad. come home.
SCREW EDWARD! COME HOME NOW TO THE FAMILY OF YOUR CHILD! WE WANT THIS KID! !!!
Edward beating self up about you. Come home.
And I always tell myself he doesn't really care. If he does, it's just about me and he doesn't want the baby. Or he's just caring about me and what I'll do to his family, like he said. If he doesn't care about the baby and can't grow up, I don't need him. I don't want him. I want nothing to do with him, except the child.
I had still yet to make up my mind if I was putting the baby up for adoption or not.
It would matter to Alice, Emmett, Carlisle and Esme, but it wouldn't matter to Edward, the one who really matters in all this. He didn't even want the kid. Neither do I for that matter. I'm too young to have kids, and I need to get into college, and take a job and then start a family after marriage. Now my life is going to be screwed up if I chose to take care of this child. The child we accidentally conceived after a one night stand when my very rude "brother" and I got too drunk after Alice left us alone to have fun so she could hang out with Jasper.
But what's done is done, I know that. No use crying over spilled milk.
I wanted control in some things. So that's why I changed my number. Now they wont be able to find me, and I can get a clean start, not having to be humiliated by my mistake.
I have been ignoring my old life, even my friend Angela. Which is why, when the doorbell rang, I was surprised.
"That's weird. None of Maddie's friends come here." I mumbled to myself.
I opened the door only to be attacked by something small and wet. I felt arms thrown around me, someone sobbing loud and hard into my chest.
"Alice! What's wrong?" I said worriedly, leading her to the couch. She sat and started telling, or rather weeping, her story to me.
"....Miss... Bel.... Edward sad..... crazy ...... not same..... JASPER BROKE UP WITH ME!" She wailed the last part louder then I'd ever heard her before, and I put my arms around her, holding her close, too shocked to do anything else. I knew how much she loved Jasper and how much he loved her. I didn't think them being apart was possible.
"Calm down Alice, calm down. I know you loved him, but I couldn't get the other parts. Then we'll talk about Jasper okay?" She nodded in my chest and took a few breaths.
"I missed you so terribly, and I want to know everything that's going on with you and my niece or nephew. Edward won't do anything because he's miserable about how he treated you. I keep asking him what he wants from you and he just keeps telling me, 'she knows what I want'. Nothings the same, everyone is moping around, talking about how they really want this kid, and how worried they are about you. They're worried about you Bella, you're our family." She started shaking violently, probably recovering from crying or the great amount of stress she must have. "Nothings the same without you. I know you keep saying you're not apart of our family, but Bella you are." She took a long deep breath and all was silent for a moment. "Remember this. 'United we stand, divided we fall." That saying is like our family, and you're apart of it." She looked up at me, her big puppy eyes imploring. Almost making me feel guilty. Almost.
"Wow, that's a lot. Okay, I'm fine, don't worry about me, and tell them not to. I doubt Edward is worried about me because he said he's only worried about what I will do to you. If I put you in tears, apparently he's right." I sighed. "Oh, and one other thing..." I hesitated. Telling her would kill her. But then I reminded myself Edward didn't want a family yet, and I didn't ever want one with him.
"What is it?" Alice chocked out.
"I might be putting the baby up for adoption."
Alice was up so fast I didn't see her move. "WHAT! ARE YOU CRAZY!" she screamed at me. She now had the intimation advantage because she was taller then me when she stood up. It felt like she was towering over me, what with her fierce tone and the determined look on her face.
"I said MIGHT! What other choice do I have? Edward is so mad at me for our mistake." Tears threatened to spill over. Tears of anger. Mostly.
"No, Bella, this is YOUR mistake. Not his." What did she mean... no, I'm just reading too much into what she said. It sounded like she was saying it was purposeful. But his shock that day, and the anger... impossible. Or maybe she meant it was my mistake for letting it come to this, adopting. Whatever the reason was, she was one scary, mad little pixie.
"Alice, I don't want to talk about this. Let's talk about Jasper." She looked fully resistant to stopping when I said the first part, but when I said the name Jasper she broke into tears and ran into my lap instantly.
I had to rock her like a baby, poor girl.
"Jasper..." heaved sob, anger completely forgotten, she wept once more into my arms. "Said he didn't love me anymore. Said I wasn't good for him and what this family represented, because you got pregnant by my brother, and I was a wreck. He wants nothing to do with me." She said chocking, her voice quivering dangerously.
"Well, he's either not worth it, or you have to chase him. Or you let him go."
She looked up at me like I was crazy. "Let him go?"
I gave her a small smile. "Yes, don't you know my favorite quote? 'If you love something, set it free. If it's meant to be it'll come back to you.' It applies to people to you know." I said, rocking her.
"Do you think he'll come back." Tears brimmed her dry eyes again.
"Yes Alice, I promise. You two were meant to be." I kissed her hair.
"You know, we all thought you and Edward were going to make it and be together. Then high school came and you drifted apart."
"And we drifted closer."
"You know, you were the one who introduced me to Jasper."
I sighed and laughed. "Jasper's a good guy, Alice. He loves you. You should have seen him that day when I left. He look about ready to kill me. He probably would have if you weren't anywhere near him. He just couldn't leave you. He cares so much Alice, you have no idea. That's why he was with you every hour of every day. Don't think I didn't hear him sneak in at night, and hear you guys staying up watching movies, trying to stifle laughter."
"You really think he loves me?" Alice asked, hope filling her voice, her tears momentarily stopped.
"No Alice. I know he loves you." I felt Alice snuggle closer to me, and I tightened my arms around her. I felt her start to relax as it sunk in that her true love loved her.
"You know Alice, it was all him. I had nothing to do with introducing you." I whispered into her hair. "I was hanging out with him one day, you know, that day when Edward snubbed me in front of all his friends and left without me." I felt her nod. "We were standing there talking, plotting ways to get back at Edward, when you pulled up in your yellow convertable. He was shocked because you were 15 years old and already driving." I laughed softly.
She giggled. "I remember that day. I can't forget it. The first time I laid my eyes on Jasper, I remember my first thought was 'Aww! he's so cute!' and my second thought was 'Why is he looking at me like I'm crazy?'"
"But he didn't think you were crazy. When you said you were going to wait over at the parking lot for Rose and Emmett, as soon as you were out of earshot, the first thing he said to me was 'Who was that?' and he asked it as if, if he didn't get the answer to the question, he would die. So I told him, 'that's my friend Alice. Don't do anything to hurt her.' and he looked at me stunned. I looked him over and I said 'Yeah! She'll love you!' and I ran off to your car."
Alice started giggling mad. "How come you never told me that?" she said as best she could, her giggling getting in the way.
"Well, I didn't think you needed to know." she poked me carefully and softly in the ribs. "All right, and he made me promise."
"What happened next?" She asked as eagerly as a kid on Christmas.
"The next day at school, he wouldn't stop asking about you. I told him everything, and I repeated my words to him. 'Don't do anything to hurt her. She'll love you.' After school, when you showed up, I introduced you, and you know the rest."
"Yeah, I fell in love with him."
"I'd think you were crazy if you didn't know that. Every moment you were together, he wouldn't let you out of his sight. You did everything together."
"Until he broke up with me." She started crying again.
"Don't cry. He'll come back to you. And if he doesn't, I'll beat him up for you. I'll keep good to my promise. This counts as hurting him."
"DON'T YOU DARE HURT HIM! I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE PREGNANT. YOU LAY A HAIR ON HIM YOU'RE IN TROUBLE!" Alice told me firmly, threatening me with an angry tone.
"I wouldn't dream of it." I smiled softly at her. "You love him a lot." It wasn't a question, it was obvious. Without words we both knew I had just proved it. She was that defensive, and he was, too. It was my fault he had left, and I knew sometime I'd have to set things right again.
"I'd die for him."
"Nah, I'm pretty sure he wouldn't let you." and we both laughed together.
Just then there was a knock at the door.
"I'll be right back Alice." I said getting up.
I didn't even bother looking who it was again. I just opened it.
"My baby!" Esme wailed and hugged me. "How are you? And your child?" Esme said looking worriedly at me and then down to my stomach and back.
"We're fine." I tried to smile. I still didn't like talking about the baby.
Esme's face broke out into a grin and she walked past me and looked sadly at Alice, who had sat up and was drying her tears.
Carlisle looked at me. "I see you're fine. It's good to know, we've been worried about you." He said to me, smiling kindly.
I ignored him, not wanting to admit to myself that they cared that much. "How are things back home?" I asked nervously. Had I screwed everything up?
"Well, you know how Alice is. Emmet's trying not to think about the fact that you're gone. It feels like losing a sister, I'm sure." He said, not exactly looking me in the eye.
"And Edward?" I didn't really want to know, but I thought it polite to ask about the father.
"He's... he feels guilty. I promised him I wouldn't say anything else." Carlisle excused himself and went to join Esme.
It was then I made up my mind.
I shook my head, shut the door, and walked over to them.
"All right guys, since you obviously know where I live, I guess I can't hide this from you either. I have something to tell you..."