A/n here is a second followup chapter because some of you asked so nicely.
Disclaimer: see my profile
JJ entered the café with the intention of grabbing coffee and a chocolate chip muffin. She'd gone to the back of the line and was looking longingly at a chocolate chip muffin, when a familiar voice said.
"Um… Hi JJ."
"Hey Reid." She said lightly turning to look at the tall thin man behind her.
Three and a half weeks had passed since she'd seduced him and left him behind to wonder why. He stood there with his messenger bag over his arm. He wore his usual dress shirt, tie and sweater vest with cords. In fact, it was the same outfit he'd worn that night.
"So you're getting coffee." He asked and then blushed.
She resisted the urge to say. "Yeah, what did you think I was doing?" Instead she said, "Mondays are the worst."
The line moved and JJ turned back to facing front. She imagined that she could feel Reid staring at the back of her head. It made the hair on her neck stand up. She shook her head and tried not to think about it.
Why wasn't he talking to her?
Because you screwed him senseless and then left, so there's no reason for him not to talk to you!
She realized that the man at the counter, who was built like a linebacker, was trying to get her attention for her order. She felt her face flame as she muttered her request for coffee and the muffin. As soon as she had it in her hand, she'd head for the door and away from hazel eyes that saw everything.
The man gave her the coffee and the muffin. She paid him and swerved off to the table at the back of the cafe instead of out the door.
What are you doing?
Since her judgment was shot she ignored the voice asking her what she was doing and waited. He must have felt her staring at the back of his head because he looked back at her when he had a giant cup of coffee in his hand.
He turned and left the café before she could raise her hand to motion him over to the table. So, she picked up her cup of coffee and followed him out into the sunshine that grated down on her nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard.
He was going to an old car that looked like it might fall apart at any moment. It was far away from the brand new car she'd bought when she'd got this job. She wanted to call out, but didn't want to embarrass him by yelling down the street. So she increased her pace and caught up to him just as he opened the door to his car.
He froze and then turned to look at her. His eyes, which had burned that night with lust, or passion, or something deeper, were closed tight to her now.
"Hey… I just wanted to talk to you."
"We talked in the cafe."
"No," She moved to the other side of the car near the passenger seat. "We exchanged pleasantries. I haven't had the chance to talk to you since…"
He blushed. "I don't want to talk about it."
"I know, but I needed to tell you that I'm sorry."
"I know… Look I have to go." He opened the door to the driver's side and got in the car. She opened the door on the passenger side and got in.
"Not till I explain."
"There's nothing to explain." He said and there was a deep sadness in his voice that made her heart constrict with all the guilt she'd been carrying around for weeks. You should feel bad!
It wasn't just me that night!
"Yes there is… I was wrong to just leave like that."
"It's not like that hasn't happened to me before. When I was fifteen, I'd just begun my first PhD. There was this girl in my advanced math class that asked me to tutor her. So I did and she managed to hold on to her scholarship. She came looking for me one day at the library. I was up in the stacks when she found me. She gave me a hand job right there in the library as her way of thanking me. Then she said that it didn't mean we were a couple or anything.
"Then there was a professor when I was nineteen and in the middle of my second PhD." He continued on. "She was my Chemistry professor. She was about thirty and brilliant as well as very beautiful. She left me note one day asking me to meet her at her apartment off campus. I knew what she wanted and I went anyway.
He remembered how the excitement of the moment had made his blood roar in his ears and how his heart beat had thumped so loudly, he couldn't hear anything else.
He'd knocked on her door and she had let him into her small apartment. She hadn't said anything to him. He wanted to talk but she kissed him. It was the first time a girl had willingly kissed him. He had no frame of reference to judge the kiss, but it had shut his brain down and fired the blood hotter in his veins.
He'd never been with a girl before. He tried to speak, to tell her that he wasn't experienced, but she ignored him. She didn't seem to care that he didn't know what he was doing.
She kept telling him to just shut up and go with it. So he did and he let her do things to him that no woman had ever done.
Her hands and mouth had worked him into a frenzy of lust that had overcome the voice in his head. Her mouth had gone down on him till he came with a shuddering moan. He remembered how his legs had got so weak; he'd slid down her living room wall to the floor.
He spent hours with her getting his brains scrambled. She'd barely let him recover from the first orgasm before she was kissing and licking his neck and chest. Her hands had stroked him hard again, and her legs and arms had surrounded him and held him to her while he entered her and clumsily thrust into her till she tightened around him and screamed his name.
The second time he'd come, it had felt like he'd emptied himself completely inside of her, leaving nothing but an empty shell behind.
The third time in fours hours nearly killed him because she'd decided that she wanted to be on top. It didn't matter that he was nearly exhausted from her enthusiasm. She rocked him into orbit one last time till he was sure he'd pop and die.
After it was over, she'd told him it was a one time deal. It wasn't true love for her. She knew that sleeping with a student was wrong, so he was to leave and not try to see her outside the classroom again.
He remembered dressing and leaving. He'd made it back to his apartment and had been glad when his roommate wasn't there. He'd convinced himself that he didn't care that she took it all so lightly. He knew there were other guys that would have killed to be in his shoes. He tried to feel that way, but after the first couple of days of thinking that he had something special, he realized that she just used him.
"I knew that I'd never be with her that way again. I tried to be glad and look at it as a good thing. The guys that I sort of got friendly with when I was working on my third PhD always talked about wanting to find a girl and have a one night stand. They said it was something that everyone did. I didn't want to be like everyone else. I finally accepted my intellect and all my talents. I didn't want to be like everyone else." He repeated.
"I'm sorry those girls treated you that way. You deserve to have someone that loves you. You're a great guy."
He blushed as he hadn't when telling her about his college professor and the girl in the stacks at the library.
"I know that somewhere out there is a beautiful girl that will appreciate you for who you are. You're a great addition to the team and everyone likes you. You'll find someone."
"No… I don't think that will happen anytime soon."
"Will you please just get out of the car? I need to get going."
He turned to her and smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes that were so hurt. "I accept your apology. We'll be friends from now on."
"Yeah… We'll be friends."
"And you'll find someone great and have kids if you want it." He told her, turning red again.
"I don't want to get married and have kids. I like my career. I have a great job and good friends."
She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "I really am sorry."
She got out of the car and he watched her walk away. Never again was he going to make the mistake of getting too close to a teammate. His lesson was learned. Some walls were just meant to stay in place. The bricks had to hold strong, because the soul behind them was fragile and raw. He couldn't get hurt if he didn't let anyone in. So he wouldn't let anyone in and he'd be safe. After all being safe was the most important thing, right?
He started up the car after JJ got out and drove away. The sun beat down on the window, so he rolled it down and let the breeze from the movement of the car lull his racing mind. His phone buzzed when he got halfway back to his apartment.
He looked at the Caller ID… It was Gideon.
"Hello sir. Yes sir… I'll be there in half an hour."
He turned the car around and headed to work. Another case needed his team to help someone that couldn't help themselves. For now, he'd believe that catching the bad guys would make everything okay.