Cloud/Leon, Leon/Cloud… crackish type short. Hope you enjoy. :)

Summary: Leon was just trying to enjoy his day off when he found himself the sudden victim of Cloud's attempts to elude the ever-present Tifa.

Disclaimer: Boys, this would be canon if I owned this stuff.

Evasive Maneuvers

Tifa Lockhart must have radar.

How else, Cloud wondered as he sulked down the streets of Radiant Garden, did the woman manage to meet him around every single corner? She just had to possess some sort of Cloudar, or Darkdar, or something that allowed her to hunt the poor ex-SOLDIER down despite his best efforts – and valiant efforts he considered them to be. Really, in the three weeks since his triumphant defeat of Sephiroth, he hadn't gone for more than three hours without her cornering him to congratulate him on his victory or to drop not-so-subtle innuendo about whatever impending relationship she thought they were bound to have.

The hints had been getting stronger lately. He had been getting them just fine. He just wasn't interested in returning the gesture.

With a scowl, he paused and pulled into a nearby alley, listening carefully. It had already been a good two and a half hours since last they had spoken, but still there was no sign of her. Maybe she had given up for the day, resigned to pouting about Cloud's thick skull, or maybe Aerith had successfully distracted the well-endowed warrior. Either way, it meant freedom for Cloud; with that possibility in mind, he allowed himself a brief stretch and a grin in preparation for a Tifa-free afternoon.

Not that he didn't like Tifa – it was quite the opposite. They were very close friends, best friends if he dared venture that far, but that didn't mean he couldn't appreciate time away from her every now and then and it certainly didn't mean they needed to get romantically involved. No, if Cloud really thought about it, he supposed he would say that he much preferred the subtle nuances of –

A sharp clang resonated through the entryway of the Bailey and it took most of Cloud's self control not to jump at the sound. Curiously, Cloud slid through the threshold to see what had interrupted his surprisingly not brooding thoughts. He immediately noticed Leon standing in the center, swinging his gunblade in a well-practiced training regime that remained undisturbed by Cloud's silent entrance. How very perfect, Cloud thought, to find the ex-SeeD looking to be in need of a sparring partner and himself with so much newly-acquired spare time. He shifted his feet and let the tip of his sword hit the ground in order to announce his presence. Leon turned abruptly, startled out of his quiet focus.

"Spar," Cloud stated, and although it had come out as more of a demand than a question, Leon nodded in reply. Leon smirked as Cloud let out a roar and charged the waiting gunblader.

They were allowed only fifteen minutes of good sparring time, however, before Tifa's voice came echoing through the walls. "Cloud?" she called, rather loudly, and Cloud was glad he had found something to keep himself much too busy to speak with her. "Cloud," she persisted, "You better be really busy or already dead to be avoiding me like this."

Well, shit. Did sparring count as "really busy"? Cloud kind of doubted it, and if Leon's now lowered gunblade and mirthful expression could tell the blond anything, it was that he wholeheartedly agreed.

And now it was too late to run again. Desperately, the blond looked for something, anything that would help him in his quest to suddenly look busy. Finding nothing, he turned to the lightly chuckling Leon to beg for aid, but he suddenly found himself with a very wicked, very brilliant idea.

Leon only had a moment to wonder about the half apologetic, half mocking face his chocobo-headed partner had adopted before Cloud leapt, knocking the two of them to the ground, and pressed his lips hard against the brunet's. Leon didn't actually have any time to process this action before Cloud was straddling him and had thrust his fingers into soft brown hair.

It was just in time, too, because Cloud had only just gotten his fingers successfully tangled when he spotted Tifa's dark shoes in the peripheral of his half-closed eyes. He allowed them to fully close as he waited for her to depart, but she had gone still and seemed uninterested in moving.

What the hell was she waiting for? Cloud was thinking maybe he should tone it up a notch to hopefully drop the hint, but Leon appeared to be processing it a bit faster. Before Cloud could even contemplate his next move, he found gloved fingers running through his own golden-colored locks and pulling gently, and suddenly there was more than one tongue in his mouth and it was dancing and massaging his own and fuck, it felt good. Leon's other hand was now moving too, but this one slowly found its way to Cloud's raised behind. He kissed a part of his masculinity goodbye as he felt a rather unmanly whimper escape past his lips and he tangled his hands farther into the mane in front of him in retaliation.

Tifa's heavy boots finally shifted in the dirt. "You could have just said you were all hot for Leon," she stated, and Cloud gratefully noted that she sounded much more amused and awkward than genuinely upset. Still he gave a sad mental wave to the last of his bruised manhood as she began to giggle and shuffle away eagerly. He listened, as attentively as he could (Shiva, Leon's hands were still moving) as the sound of her boots faded quickly.

Cloud let go of Leon's hair and pulled back hastily, the brunet letting him up without complaint. Neither failed to notice the newly rumpled clothes and mussed hair of the other.

"Thanks," Cloud breathed as he stood and readjusted his shirt. He tried to ignore the languidly posed Leon, who was sitting back against one hand with his legs sprawled out in front of him and his other hand running through messy hair. Nothing, Cloud surmised, could really be better labeled "THOROUGHLY AND PROPERLY KISSED."

Leon didn't bother hiding his shocked (albeit rather pleased) expression as he regarded the blond before him. "Anytime," he finally called to the now-retreating Cloud. The blond didn't acknowledge him, so he remained placidly seated on the ground before slowly rising to his previously halted training.

Cloud, on the other hand, paused only after he was out of range of the Bailey. He gently touched his fingers to his still-tingling lips and felt a smirk rise across his features.

Maybe he'd have to take Leon up on that.

I like Tifa, really I do. But this idea bit me and wouldn't go away until it came out.

And go Leon. Boy can be caught completely off guard and still be totally hot about it.

Anyway, this is my first time posting a Cleon (or anything shounen ai, for that matter...), so I do hope you enjoyed it at least a little. :) It's so short, bah! DX C&C appreciated, thank you!