Sessions II: Nine Months
A/N: So this is it folks. I've appreciated every kind word, every thought, favorite and alert along the way. This story, from it's beginning in Sessions, was my first foray into writing a full length novel. Truth be told, by word count it's actually about four or five books! It was a labor of love, an experiment to see if i could do it and a fun and fantastic journey into discovering what I was truly capable of. And I am thrilled to know just how many of you love it. Thank you, thank you for all of your support along the way. It truly honors me to know that you've read my words and become attached to my thought process because I can't take credit for these amazing characters. I can only study them to learn how to write such fantastic amazing people.
Thank you to Spot and Punk for being my beta and my sounding board. She has been invaluable through out. And thanks to all of those great people i got to know who have read this from the beginning. I count you among my friends!
I have one more little one shot in this Sessions Universe that I will post called Sessions: Ben and the Purple Crayon. And unless the muse gets a wind of inspiration to delve into their world again, I think we can close the book on these two and know that they lived Happily Ever After. Thanks again and Enjoy!
The sound of gentle crying woke House from his light slumber. His eyes turned to the clock on his nightstand and he quickly got up before Mother Bear stirred. House liked these quiet times in the wee hours of morning. He used to spend them once upon a time ago with his bourbon and his piano just enjoying the solitude of the quiet night. But now, he enjoyed the solitude of just him and his son. It was their time, uninterrupted, peaceful and nice. He would get up and cross the few steps to his bassinet in their room and pick him up without making a sound. Ben wasn't much of a crier, he just kind of whined and complained a bit when he was uncomfortable, needed his diaper changed or was hungry. They were very lucky from what people told them because evidently a baby who cried a lot and didn't sleep at night was like a living nightmare.
As House changed him, the little baby looked up at him intently gurgling with newborn excitement. He knew he couldn't really see much, just some blurry shadows and colors, but the curve of the baby's lips into a semblance of a smile made House feel good. Irrational though it may be, he was proud to see his son smile at him, even if he couldn't seriously distinguish him from the tree painted on the wall behind him. Nevertheless, he picked up the baby and placed him high over his shoulder as he made his way downstairs to the kitchen.
Cate pumped out breast milk regularly so he would be able to feed the baby at night. It had become their little routine in the short few weeks they had been home. They shared most of the daytime stuff, like the feeding and changing. His favorite was the bath because Ben smelled so good all wrapped up in his teddy bear towel when he was done.
House never thought that he would become as attached to another human being as he was to Ben. He never, ever contemplated just how much he would love being a dad. Every little detail made him happy, from the minute he woke up to the second he laid his head on the pillow at night, knowing he'd be up in a few short hours to tend to his son again. All of it made him giddy with pride. He adored the little socks that covered his pink little feet. He reveled in the smell of the fabric softener they used to keep his jammies soft. He was amused by the stupid little rattles and the cheesy little bunnies on all of the blankets that kept him warm. But, mostly, he loved to hold him when he fed him a bottle and then lay him on his chest in the quiet of the afternoon to take a nap.
No one could have predicted just how much he'd enjoy being a part of it, least of all him. There was a part of him, when he'd found out that Cate was pregnant, that was terrified that having a baby would change his life forever; that he wouldn't be capable of loving someone so unconditionally. He wanted to run and for a split second he wanted her to not want the baby, to make that decision to terminate so they could go back to just being them, the two of them alone together without responsibility. But now looking back on it, it was all fear. Fear of being this happy, fear of being this guy that loved wholly without question. He never knew that he could love this much. It was true that he loved Cate with all of his heart and soul. But this was different. This kind of love, the kind that a parent holds for their child was remarkably different and distinctly soul stirring. People who didn't have children would never understand it. It was just a fact. He hadn't known until he held Ben in his arms on the day he was born.
In the quiet of the night, he continually thought about his wife. Cate had always believed in him. It was one of the things that he loved so much about her. She had faith that he would be a good father to their son. He was scared in the beginning that he would wind up like his father, bitter angry, harsh and unloving. But Cate had taught him how to love and accept things he couldn't control. She had taught him to be a better man and she had helped him learn how to love again.
If this gentle boy in his arms was any testament to that fact, she had succeeded tenfold. He loved both of them unconditionally; they were his family. And he would never go back to the darkness that had ruled his heart for so many years.
He was saved. Saved by a woman who understood him completely and by the knowledge that he would live on in someone else. He would be the best father he could. He would love unconditionally and he would be there for everything. He just didn't know any other way to be anymore.
Greg House was a changed man.