Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or anything else depicted within, I only came up with the idea for this story. So if any of you lawyers try to bug me about this little tale, then I'm afraid that you'll have to be introduced to my friend, Mr. Pencil…
Normal Speech: "Darkness…"
Normal Thoughts: 'Is within…'
Radio in Use: [All things…]
Demon Speech: "You just…"
Demon Thoughts: 'Have to know…'
Other Speech: "Where to look…"
Jutsu in Use: "Kage no Jutsu…"
Date, September 9: Uh, hi! I'm Naruto, I've never really written in one of these diary things before, or is it a journal? I forget what guys call them some times. Either way, Jiji said it would be good for me to write in this thing since I don't make any friends. He said it'd be like having someone to talk to, er write to, that won't ever tell anyone what I've said or judge me. Not sure If I'll ever use you or not, all I want right now is to finish this so I can go to school, maybe I'll even make some friends!
(Two Years Later…)
Date, October 10: It happened again, those same people who always tell their children to make friends, to treat others with respect, to always treat others as you would have them treat you… those same people attacked me again. Every year it's always the same thing, I walk out of my house so they don't trash it, walk to an alley and they pounce. It's become routine for me, possibly for them as well. Either way, they don't stop; it's all so stupid, so ridiculous, a joke. A really bad Joke…
A blond boy of about eight sits at a seat in class, eyes half closed as he listens to his teacher rant on and on about something. The boy has blond spiky hair, azure blue eyes, and tanned skin with three whisker scars on his cheeks. He is wearing a black shirt with a red spiral on the front, a pair of long blue shorts, and a pair of dark blue Shinobi-Sandals. Looking around with a single eye, the young boy soon noticed the glares coming at him from time to time.
Making an inward note to write that in his Journal later the young man soon hears the bell ring and makes his way out of the class like the others. Ignoring them all the blond makes his way out of the school and then quickly moves to the side, hiding in the shadows and watching the kids as they meet with their parents. Blue eyes seem to flash green in the dim light as a wicked looking smile crawled over his lips. A bad Joke, the words rang through his mind as he watched the so-called loving parents as they met with their children…
Oh the things that he could tell those children about their oh so loving parents, how they cut him, how they beat him, how they were fiends and monsters worse than even the Kyuubi…
An amused chuckle escaped his throat as he then turned into the shadows and walked off. Licking his lips the blond made his way off the school grounds and soon found himself walking the streets of Konoha. Placing his hands into his pockets the blond continued to watch people, turning from normal people to glaring monsters. 'Morality, Justice, Fairness, Morality, Honor, its all such a bad joke…' He thinks to himself as he turns down a corner, soon entering the shadows once more… This boy is Uzumaki Naruto, the author of a Journal, a journal depicting the world as a Joke, nothing more…
(Two years later…)
Date, June 5: I've been watching the other kids, the parents, and everyone else around town after my discovery two years ago. Sorry for not righting back to you in so long, but my life just seems to get more and more like a bad joke. I see people who act all kind and nice become cruel and spiteful as soon as they're alone with me, or even when they think that no one is looking. It's becoming so apparent that everyone is wearing a mask; I need some way to test this, to see what's under that mask… but how? Until then I'll continue to use a mask to hide myself from the Bad Joke, I'll become my opposite and walk among them as something else, I'll be a smiling idiot, but they should beware what's beneath this smile…
A Ten-year-old Naruto sits on top of the Academy, whistling to himself as he looks at a simple piece of paper with a seal on it. Now wearing an Orange Jumpsuit with a blue T over the front and white fur around his neck, a silver spiral on his left bicep and a red one on his back, a pair of green goggles over his forehead, a Kunai Case at his right thigh, weapons pouch at the back of his hip, and dark blue Shinobi Sandals.
A chuckle escapes the boys lips as he, grinning widely, then falls forward, a rope holding onto him as he falls to rest above the door to the Academy, then puts a paper with a seal on it just above the door to the academy then pushes himself back up. A snicker escapes his lips as he then turns on his heel with a light whistle, jumping off the roof he walks calmly into the Shinobi Academy. Looking at a few more pieces of paper in his hand that are the same color as the walls, he discreetly places them on the walls of the building while heading to his class.
Licking his lips the blond walked into his classroom and then over to a chair and put another piece of paper down, painted to match it. Nodding his head he then walked over to the window and jumped out, closing the window behind him he pulled a final piece of paper from his orange jacket. "Alright, now lets upset the established order of this Bad Joke, and introduce…" Naruto starts to say before a grin works its way over his face for a few moments as he notices people walking into the academy to start school.
"… a little chaos…" He whispers while pumping some Chakra into the Paper and then drops it onto the ground. Walking away with a whistle he then jumped over and passed a bush, brushing a hand through his spiky hair. With that several explosions of smoke and loud screams rock the academy, Naruto turning to watch with a grin on his face and a chuckle in his throat. Reaching into his jacket once more he pulls out a little black Journal and begins to right into it.
"It would seem that pranks, or maybe just things that aren't expected, things no one could possibly predict are a way to reveal the true faces of the people. With only a couple little Smoke Bombs the Academy was driven into a panic, I can scarcely imagine what a little more could do. Would the people run in fear, would they curse their tormentor, or would some seek to emulate him, maybe even become him? I need to do more research; I need to know where this Bad Joke will finally end… What the punch line of it all is." Naruto says while writing down the words, then turns on his heel while putting the book back into his jacket and disappears down a nearby dark alley…
(Two years later…)
Date, April 22: My latest idea worked, my prank was simple really, I painted up the Hokage Monument, and BOOM everyone is freaking out over it. It seems that when you change one teeny tiny thing in the world, no, about "The Plan", people just start loosing their minds… Yes, I've seen it first hand so many times, if you mess up the plan even a little bit, people start acting like they are without their masks. I've seen it so often; the masks come down to show the two faced monsters that lay beneath… its all so funny really… a really funny but really Bad Joke… The Plan is actually very simple, everyone follows it and no one panics. All it is, is that the people believe that they can control their little worlds. All of them are just a bunch of Schemers, and when you ruin the schemers little plans, they start to loose their little minds. Doesn't matter, I've got to go do something tonight for Mizuki-Teme so I can finally become a Ninja, I need to see if the rest of the world is a bad joke too…
(Three Months later…)
Date, September 9: I finally passed the Ninja academy on my fourth try. Learned that the Kyuubi is sealed in me. Strange how the Bad Joke around me just seems more and more funny as time goes by. Maybe I'm finally starting to lose it. Don't know don't care. My team is probably doomed. First up, Emo-Teme, AKA Uchiha Sasuke: He's supposed to be from some big family, but it's all gone now, has these weird eyes that copy things, sounds like a Thief to me. Next, Haruno Sakura: I like her, she's the biggest joke I've ever seen in this weird village, always caring more about her looks than anything else, even her health when that should really matter most. She also talks about how she likes making friends from time to time when she gave up a true friend to chase Sasuke. And last is our Sensei, Hatake Kakashi: AKA The Lazy Pervert of Konoha. He's annoying, late, and stupid. That whole Teamwork crap is bull, given enough time and hunger, and we'd eat each other, don't matter if we're a little team or not. Everything is just a joke. Got to stop now, need to wake up early for a mission with some old drunk tomorrow…
Naruto was still in his orange Jumpsuit, with a black and orange backpack slung over one shoulder and a Konohagakure Hittai-Ate wrapped around his forehead. Looking around as he neared the village Gates he saw only his teammates Sakura and Sasuke, he couldn't help but twitch upon seeing them. 'Oh great, its miss Bad Joke herself and the annoying Avenger-Teme…' Naruto thinks to himself as he puts on a smile and walks towards his two 'teammates'.
"Yo! How's it going?" Naruto asks happily and gets a grunt from Sasuke and a glare from Sakura in response.
"Naruto-Baka, shut up! It's too early for you to be screaming…" Sakura says with a frown while rubbing her temples and Naruto can't help another twitch as he watches her and the Sasuke Teme as he's dubbed him.
"Sorry, Bad Joke Girl…" He says lowly, Sakura not noticing while Sasuke raises a brow upon hearing his words yet ignores it all the same. Licking his lips Naruto then sweeps a hand through his spiky locks and walks over to lean into the wall of the gate on the opposite side of, Sakura. Sasuke, though uncaring, decides to watch and notices as Naruto pulls a little black book from his jacket and starts to write in it. Watching the blond he notices him mouthing something and narrows his eyes in order to read his lips more discreetly from, Sakura, who of course was looking at him adoringly.
"… must know what is going on outside the walls of Konoha. Everything is like a bad joke wherever I turn in this damned place. People act all nice and they try to make themselves out to be fine upstanding people at first, but the truth is that given no choice, they'd eat one another. I've seen it first hand, I've seen it when people are so pushed to the brink, what they will do. I've seen the madness that resides inside of everyone, but why do they hide it? What reason? The Plan…" He says to himself silently before stopping and nodding his head for a few moments, then starting once more.
"Yes, The Plan. The Plan rules everything, when a Criminal or even a Shinobi dies no one cares, because it's all part of the plan. Even if the plan is horrible, they go along with it because it's how they've been wired to work… Yes. Like Sasuke, they kiss his ass because he's the last of his clan, because he's part of the plan… The Plan to have his little clan come back to life for his special little eyes. I wonder if he even knows how intertwined into their little plan he is. That must be why we have Kakashi as our Sensei, yes, because its part of the schemers plan…" Naruto mouths to himself with Sasuke's eyes shooting open as he then watches Naruto close the book and quickly turns away from the blond, wondering what plan the other boy was talking about…
(One Month Later)
Date, October 10: Of course my ass of a Sensei would bring us back today of all days, Kami forbid that we hang out in Wave longer… I'm annoyed, I've found that the people outside this place aren't a bad Joke, at least Haku wasn't, not sure if he was really a he, but he sounded and looked like a she. Haku died for what (s)he believed in, Haku had no plan, Haku was chaos, insanity, anarchy, lawlessness, Pandemonium! Yes, that was Haku, I like it, it's not in the plan, it's something else, something that has neither rhyme nor reason, it makes things fun. My mask is becoming more and more like my real self, unable to stop smiling recently, it's starting to hurt, I don't want to smile, but I can't stop, had to force my face to relax and turn serious before righting. I knew this would happen, I knew I'd eventually become a bad joke too…
Closing his Journal, Naruto then stands up and walks to one of the boards of his floor, pressing down it swings up and he catches it. Kneeling down, the blond then sticks the book into the new hiding place and then presses the board back into the floor before getting up and shaking his head. "All part of the plan…" He muses to himself while turning around and walking out of his apartment, then down a dark street. Feeling the "KI" before anyone even moved the blond mentally counted down before hearing a few screams and blinking in surprise.
Turning around the blond sees a man, darkened in shadows with a blade in one hand and a couple bodies nearby. Eyes widening Naruto takes a quick step back only for the man to move quickly and grab him. Looking up he sees a pair of strange green eyes looking down at him and hears the cracking of his neck.
"So what do we have here?" The man asks before throwing the young teen into the alley and walking towards him. "Another worthless waste of flesh walking around for some random psychopath to murder?" The man questions while stalking towards the blond, Naruto backpeddling a few paces while looking towards the man with wide eyes. "What's the matter?" The strange man questions while walking towards him, looking him in the eyes, his own near luminescent eyes glaring into his own azure ones.
"Can't you see the funny side of things?" The man asks while kneeling down before Naruto, the young Teen's back hitting the brick wall behind him soon after. "Why so serious?" The man then asks with a chuckle and grabs Naruto by the front of his jacket while sticking a knife into his mouth. "Why so Serious?" He asks once more as Naruto sees a flash of a nearby light, showing a man with dark brown hair and a very scarred up face. "Lets put a smile on that face…" The man says in a low dark tone before a scream and a psychotic laugh echoed from the alleyway…
"Where is, Naruto?" Kakashi questioned the landlord of Naruto's apartment, and had a VERY bad feeling something had happened to the boy. The Village had only just received a report about a Nuke-Nin from Kiri somehow managing to get into the Village. And as soon as that got to him, Kakashi couldn't allow his students to be in danger, he checked on Sasuke and Sakura first, knowing Naruto had some street smarts and could take care of himself, he thought it was prudent.
"That little…" The landlord started till he noticed Sasuke and Sakura nearby and bit his tongue before speaking. "He went out." He offered and Kakashi looked around, and then walked quickly to the stairs leading up to Naruto's apartment. Kneeling down the man looked for anything unusual before forming several hand seals.
"Sakura, Sasuke, stand back." The man orders as he then puts his hand over the ground as a pug with a blue bandana wrapped around its neck appeared. "Pakkun, I need you to find Naruto as quickly as possible." Kakashi ordered and "Pakkun" sniffed the air for a few moments before then jumping off with Kakashi following. Looking to one another Sasuke and Sakura followed after the man, rushing down a street until they found Kakashi looking at something with a single eye wide open.
"Sensei, what's wrong?" Sakura started before a streetlight flickered on and showed several bodies in the alley, causing Sakura to scream and take a step back, Sasuke's right eye twitching as he sees the familiar scene.
"That one…" Kakashi mutters while moving over to one of the bodies and pulls a Kirigakure Hittai-ate with a slash over it from the mans corpse…
"That's the killer! But, what about?!" Sakura asks while looking around the bodies and Pakkun slowly walks over to the corpse and a light flickers above them, Sakura covering her mouth in horror. The mans throat had been slit, with a Glasgow grin carved into his face with red formed over his lips and the cuts like an eerie smile of some kind of clown…
"Who did this?" Sasuke questioned while looking at the Kiri Nin and Kakashi looked to Pakkun.
"Naruto's scent is all over him, and a trail of the kids blood is leading away from here." The Dog said and Sakura and Sasuke both looked at it in shock while Kakashi went wide eyed at the implications.
"Sasuke, Sakura, come on, Naruto's injured and obviously he needs out help." Kakashi says while quickly getting up and both he and Pakkun rushed off, Sasuke looks at the body for a few more moments before following after the Jounin with a sick Sakura following the other two to find their teammate. Following after the scent, the four, including Pakkun at least, soon found themselves at a building outside of the city, a large warehouse of some kind.
"What is this place?" Sasuke questions of his Sensei with a raised brow, Kakashi inwardly frowning to himself with narrowed eyes.
"It's an old plant for making Chakra conductive paper, weapons and such. They stopped using it when they found the Chemicals they were using were also messing with the workers minds. It's been abandoned ever since." Kakashi reported while also realizing that this was where Naruto always got his Paper Bombs and supplies for his numerous pranks over the years.
"Why would Naruto come here?" Sakura questions while Kakashi pulls a light from his belt and points it towards the ground, a trail of blood over the ground leading to the door, where the lock looked to have been broken off.
"Because, nowhere else in all of Konoha is safer for Naruto than here…" Kakashi muttered bitterly before making his way into the old warehouse, Sasuke and Sakura behind him. "Spread out and find him. Flare your Chakra if you do so I can get to you." Kakashi orders with Sasuke and Sakura nodding before rushing off into the building, Kakashi looking around with narrowed eyes before walking into the darkness to find his missing Student. 'Be safe Naruto…' Kakashi thinks to himself as he walks towards the basement so he can find the young blond.
Sasuke walks along a catwalk, looking around for his Teammate, and possibly his only real friend. Looking down he's surprised to see several large vats of green fluid. However, stopping when he hears a bang, Sasuke looks forward to see a shadowed figure huddled forward, sounds of coughing coming from it. "Naruto!" Sasuke shouts and the shadowed figure turns while a light comes on from above, showing the blond teen with red stains over his jumpsuit, his Hittai-ate gone, and his left hand over his mouth while he continues to cough, blood seeping past his fingers as he does. In his right hand however, Sasuke sees a curved, single edged Kunai with blood over it.
"Naruto!" Someone shouts behind the blond, surprising him and causing him to turn quickly towards the voice. However, his foot accidentally rolls onto a pipe and the boy trips, falling off of the catwalk until he grabs one of the bars with an arm, still hanging onto the Kunai with one hand.
"Shit!" Sasuke says to himself while rushing over to the boy, Sakura doing so as well, having been the one who spooked the blond in the first place. Sliding onto his side, Sasuke reaches out for Naruto, only for the boy to swipe at him with his Kunai and nearly fall as soon as he did. "Sakura, stay back!" Sasuke orders while holding a bleeding hand towards the girl, the rosette taking a few steps back as Sasuke looks towards Naruto. "Naruto, give me your hand." Sasuke said while reaching towards the blond, but he coughed instead and Sasuke gritted his teeth.
"Dammit Dobe! Give me your hand so I can save you!" Sasuke shouted and Naruto looked at him, before coughing once more and quickly moving his hand away from his mouth. "Oh Kami…" Sasuke breaths out while seeing a pair of long cuts in the blond boy's cheeks, forming a Glasgow grin while blood is formed over his face. Even as he said this, Sasuke noticed Naruto coughing more and more, however soon the coughing started to sound strange, irregular while Sakura was looking at their friend in horror, wondering where their Sensei was… when the blond started laughing…
The laughter wasn't pleasant however, it was strange, devilish laughter that echoed throughout the entire room. "N-Naruto?" Sakura questioned while hearing the blond boy laugh almost insanely while barely hanging onto the catwalk. At that moment, Kakashi came running towards the blond and reached out for him, only to see a pair of bright green eyes look at him from where the blonds were. The Blond used Kakashi's temporary state of Shock to stab the man, causing him to take a quick step back while Naruto fell, Sasuke lunging forward barely managing to grab the boy by his wrist.
"Naruto!" Sasuke says loudly while being pulled by the blond's weight and uses an arm to hang onto the other boy. "Hang on!" Sasuke shouts and instead Naruto continues to laugh, kicking his legs around in the air while hanging onto the Kunai in his right hand.
"Now I see! NOW I SEE THE FUNNY SIDE!" Naruto yells insanely while continuing to laugh loudly while Sasuke tries to pull Naruto back up. "This is all one big Joke! All of it, its part of the Plan." Naruto says while looking at Sasuke who pants while hanging on, Kakashi moving to help him pull Naruto up. "They make you out to be their White Knight, while I'm nothing but a freak. The freak saved by the Knight, oh what a Story that would make." Naruto says while sounding half crazed and then starts to laugh once more and releases a finger from the Kunai in his hand.
"Naruto, stop talking like that! Just hang on we're trying to help you." Kakashi says while looking to the blond, those strange green eyes looking back at him while the green fumes continue to linger over his body.
"Oh no. That would be all part of the plan…" Naruto says still sounding half crazed before then grinning towards his so-called team insanely. "But I'm not part of the plan, I'm a Freak because I'm an outsider…" He says with a grin while looking towards them, the Glasgow grin over his face splitting open at the sides of his lips, another finger releasing its hold on the Kunai. "And fortunately for me, unlike all of you, I really don't like to follow the plan…" Naruto then says with a laugh as he releases the kunai, catches it with his left hand and stabs Sasuke in the forearm, causing him to shout in pain while releasing the blond.
The laughing teen fell at that moment, laughing insanely even as he hit the vat of chemicals. The three could only look on in shock as they saw him fall deeper into the vat, soon nothing but bubbles being left of the boy… and soon enough, even those stopped…
"N-Naruto…" Sakura whispered with wide eyes, Kakashi looking on before falling to his knees while Sasuke held his arm.
"No!" Sasuke whispered while looking over and tried to jump over himself only for Kakashi to quickly grab him. "Let me go Dammit! We have to save him!" Sasuke shouted loudly and Kakashi shook his head.
"He's gone…" The man says simply with Sasuke glaring at him in response. "C'mon Sasuke, we have… we have to report this to Sandaime-Sama…" Kakashi says while Sasuke glares at him, Sakura looking over the edge of the catwalk towards the green chemicals below. Hearing shouting she turns her head to see Kakashi having to bodily carry the dark haired teen out of the old warehouse. Clenching her hands over the bars of the catwalk Sakura slowly reaches into her equipment pouch and then pulls out an old playing card. On the front is a strange jester with a staff, the word JOKER printed beside of the clown while the back has a strange design.
"I don't know why I thought this reminded me of you…" She mumbled while looking at a clown on the card, its edges old and warns. "But I thought you might like to have it…" She mumbled while dropping the card and quickly rushing away from the catwalk even as the card fell to float on top of the vat of chemicals…
All was silent in the warehouse for a long while, until a hand suddenly rose from the green liquid and took hold of the card, insane laughter echoing throughout the entire room loudly…
NU: The Killing Joke…
I believe, whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you… Stranger…
A hand suddenly bursts out of a familiar chemical vat, it then takes hold of the side of the vat and lifts a body over and out of it. The person lands on the ground with a thud while slowly pulling himself along the ground, wearing a strange purple jumpsuit and bearing a pair of black Shinobi Sandals. A chuckle then echoes across the room, as the person then reaches out for something to take hold of. Grabbing a metal pipe the figure pulls himself up onto his feet, a familiar curved Kunai in hand and a card sticking out behind his ear while he cracked his neck.
"Ugh… What a trip…" He mutters before yanking the pipe down and then walks off, pipe and Kunai in hand he walks deeper into the strange place. Walking down a hall he soon turns into an old bathroom and walks over to look at a mirror. Looking at him was a boy with bright green eyes, and a Glasgow grin scarred over his cheeks, partly covering all of the three whisker scars on each of his cheeks. Looking at his face he seemed to recall something for only a fraction of a second before gritting his teeth and putting a hand over it, his other on the wall while digging his Kunai into it.
"Why so serious…" He whispers then notices the card behind his ear and reaches for it, pulling it from his ear he looks at the figure on it and a laugh escapes his lips. "Why so serious…" He muses while dropping the card and opening a nearby drawer, pulling out several face paints that looked to have belonged to someone years ago and drops them into the sink, one white, the next black, and one green. "Why so serious…" He says with a laugh while opening the white one first and uses both hands to spread it all over his face and ears.
He then takes the black one and quickly makes rings around his eyes, then three stripes over his cheeks. "Why so Serious…" He whispers while taking the green and opens it, using his hands he then spreads that into his blond hair, turning it a strange greenish blond before placing his hands onto the sink to look at his work. Looking all around he then notices something on the floor nearby and picks it up, an old thing of lipstick. Opening it up he breaks off a hardened piece to find some still usable and then quickly spreads that over his lips and the Glasgow Scars…
"Lets put a smile on that face…" He utters while looking at himself in the mirror, seeing a painted up clown looking back at him with bright green eyes. Laughing lightly the teen then reaches up to take the Kunai back and then looks at his reflection one last time before smashing it with the butt of the Kunai. Laughing to himself, the young man turned on his heel and nearly stumbled out of the room, Card and Kunai in hand he made his way out of the old warehouse and saw a nearby city.
Walking a path he didn't know or remember the young teen set out on a new journey into the unknown…
Date, ??: Head hurts, can't focus… I read this book, who wrote it? Don't know. How did I know where it was? Who am I? Don't know that either. Bad Joke, I see it too, it's all a really Bad Joke. Yes, Chaos, Pandemonium! Yes!! A Bringer, Harbinger, Messenger, Agent of Chaos! YES! The joke is so bad can't stop laughing, can't focus, everything is so funny, it's all so funny, and it's all so FUCKING HILLARIOUS!! Mind feels like its breaking. But painting is fun, I paint myself, scars like a grin, need a name, don't know what, not this person's name obviously, my hand righting sucks, his is so much better… A Bad Joke, Bad Joke… Joke… No… Joker!
AN: The first of a possible Series of One-Shots with Naruto as the main villain, obviously, as well as the main character. I've seen a couple "Joker-Naruto" stories, but I got this idea while reading a story about "The Killing Joke" and after watching "The Dark Knight" once again. Please tell me what you think and read and review if you liked the story and want me to continue this short series, which will possibly have another Naruto Character becoming Two-Face, Harley Quin, and of course any other Villain I might be able to put in, like Poison Ivy. If you have ideas or concerns feel free to express them, I enjoy getting reviews and especially creative comments.