Chapter 5: The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools

Epilogue

The rest of Draco and Hermione's last year at Hogwarts flew by at an alarming rate. During their remaining time in the castle, they continued to take full advantage of their private quarters and included the Potions professor in their escapades as often as possible.

The Head Boy and Girl graduated two months later, Hermione shattering the school's N.E.W.T. records and Draco coming in right behind her. When they boarded the Hogwarts Express for the final time, they did so with the promise that whatever direction their futures took them in, they wouldn't forget, regret, or forsake the friendship that they had forged that year.

Hermione went on to continue her studies at the leading wizarding university – taking on an intimidating course load of only the most advanced classes available – while Draco began his political career, following proudly in his father's footsteps but with slightly more philanthropic ideals. If nothing else, his relationship with the Gryffindor Muggle-born had opened his eyes to the fact that Lucius Malfoy was not always right.

Through their busy schedules and demanding obligations, the former Head students remained the best of friends, Floo calling each other regularly and hanging out as often as possible, which almost always resulted in an amazing shag session or two.

The shagging, though, came to an abrupt end when Draco met and fell in love with a tall, gorgeous wizard named Xavier that worked in the International Cooperation Department of the Ministry. Interestingly enough, Xavier was a Muggle-born as well, and had been trained at the Beauxbatons Academy of Magic. As Hermione had once predicted, Draco's parents threatened to disown him when they found out about their only son's relationship, but the pure-blood couldn't have cared less. He was happy and that was all that mattered. In the end, Narcissa threw her two sons the best wedding that Galleons could buy and after a well-placed threat from a certain ex-Death Eater, Lucius begrudgingly attended the ceremony

Though the blond didn't revisit Hogwarts until his own blue-eyed daughter was sorted – Slytherin, of course – Hermione made the trip often. She kept in contact with Severus throughout her years at university, corresponding via owls and visiting the snarky wizard whenever the chance arose. He helped her through her advanced classes and in return, she provided him with the affection that his life had been missing for so long. As they learned more about each other, their odd friendship-with-benefits developed into something deeper and infinitely more complex.

Five years after her Hogwarts graduation, Albus offered Hermione the recently-vacated Arthimancy position at the school. She immediately accepted. At her first Welcoming Feast as a professor, Severus surprised her by getting down on one knee in front of the entire student body and asking her to be his wife. Again, she immediately accepted.

The two Professor Snapes lived, loved, and taught in the drafty old castle for many years. When Dumbledore finally retired, Severus took over as headmaster and with Hermione's help, led the school for longer than any other wizard in Hogwarts' history. There were many skeptics that questioned the former Death Eater's ability to steer the ancient academy of magic through the next century, but with his headstrong, outspoken Gryffindor at his side, Severus enacted countless meaningful and lasting changes that irrevocably altered the school for the better. One of the first and arguably most mysterious edicts that he established was the grand feast and celebration that became tradition every April Fools' Day.

The End


Well, there you have it. The end of this bizarre little story. I hoped you enjoyed the crack factor as much I enjoyed writting it. I apologize if I've psychologically scarred anyone. Feel free to send me the shrink bills, but before you do, please REVIEW!

Chapter title courtesy of Doug Larson.