SORRY! I'm sorry I took FOREVER!! And the chapter isn't all that great (to me, anyway)… Enjoy?? Oh, and sorry I made Blaise a goofball… and disturbing.
Automatic Fanatic is the name of, for the sake of the plot, a group of Potter-admirers that take it upon themselves to do whatever they feel their hero needs. In other words, deranged stalkers.
Alwyn Milthrope is a character from the last chapter. So if you didn't read that, do so now~!
WARNINGS: Talk of nipples, annoying first-years, and attempted murder by barrels.
~Sixth Day of Bet~
"Ronald Billius Weasley, I am Alwyn Milthrope and you are under arrest by decree of Automatic Fanatic. Surrender or face punishment."
Ron grimaced. He was starting to really hate this kid. If it had been the first time the first-year had said that statement, he might've laughed a little. It wasn't everyday that a magically-inexperienced kid thought he could challenge him head-on. But no, this wasn't funny anymore. That's because this was the fifth time the persistent bugger had done this. And, from the way Milthrope's face scrunched up in determination, this was in no way the last time unless Ron got rid of him… permanently.
"What is your problem," Ron exclaimed, waving his hands violently at the younger teen.
"My problem is that you apparently don't think kidnapping Harry Potter is a serious offence," Alwyn deadpanned, though his eyes revealed fiery anger. "And I also have a problem with falling from high up into the hard ground!"
Weasley shrugged. It really was the brat's fault. He should've known not to annoy someone while about 70 feet in the air and on an undefended broom. Not his responsibility to ensure the first-years had some sort of common sense. Wasn't McGonagall in charge of that? What did she do all day? (As of late, Professor McGonagall had discovered the wonders of day-time television. While that occupied most of her days, she spent most nights making sure her secretary didn't do anything impure to students.) "Listen, I really don't have time for this right now. Would you just go eat dirt and leave me be?"
Ron ignored the offended look shot at him now and picked up the large barrel next to him. He leaned out the window slightly, scanning the grounds surrounding the tower he was in. Finally he spotted his target, a certain ferret, and heaved it in his direction.
Draco Malfoy looked warily at the sky before moving back two steps. A loud splintering noise resonated the grounds as dust from the sudden impact flew from the place he had just been standing. After the dust had cleared, a small pile of smashed wood could be seen. Draco rolled his eyes before turning to glare at the source of the projectile.
"You nearly hit me, you Weasel," he yelled, hoping his well-known snarl could be seen from such a distance. No need to look so menacing if no one could see it. After all, it might cause wrinkles later on…
"I was aiming for you, you twat!" Apparently his snarl could be seen because he could perfectly see the angry scowl he was receiving from Weasley. Unless the Weasel was so poor, he couldn't afford good eye care. Which Draco doubted seeing as the other boy had managed to perfectly throw another barrel at him from a tower. It had to take some skill and precision. "Now stay still!"
Ron grabbed the ankle of a first-year who had been floating on a broom nearby, trying to arrest the older boy, and flung him at the blonde wizard below them. Said blonde waited a few seconds to calculate the landing before sidestepping three steps. When no loud crashing sound came, Draco looked up to see that the first-year was now floating in mid-air above him. He turned to look at the person now beside him.
"You could at least try to save them," Granger said, wand pointed up at the younger student. She spared a moment to give Draco a glare before lowering the student down to their side. "They're on our side, you know."
Draco sniffed, turning his head away from the woman. "I'm on no one's side but my own, Granger. Besides, your side has the tendency to go crazy and kidnap people," Draco said, clearly referring to the fact that Ron had, out of nowhere, taken Potter that morning and holed themselves in one of the lesser-used towers of Hogwarts.
"Yeah? Well, your side seems to have the habit of falling in love with those crazy people and talking to walls."
Draco frowned as he turned to see Blaise Zabini still talking to a wall as he had been doing all morning. He had been like that since news of the kidnapping spread round the school and rumors arose about why the sudden incident happened. The most believable theory was that Ron had snapped after being not-so-secretly in lust with his friend since the start of the bet and decided to have his way with Potter in a secluded area. But there was also gossip about Weasley's feelings being reciprocated and the two eloping. (Which wouldn't exactly explain the whole tower thing, but who cares? This was the most exciting thing since You-Know-Who died.)
Apparently, Blaise didn't care which theory was correct since it always came back to Ron being in love with Harry. Which, to him, someone who had just been revealed to be in love with the psycho redhead, was not the happiest thought. Somehow, Blaise had ended up talking about heartbreak to a wall as everyone around him, other than Draco, who was interested in only the entertainment, ran around trying to save the Golden Boy.
"Ron has nice lips," Zabini muttered to the wall, though his eyes were staring at Ron in the window instead. "Very plump and-"
"I don't even know him," Draco cut in, ignoring the shocked, hurt look he felt his friend give him. He'd remember to apologize later… If the other male ever stopped his disgusting rambling long enough to.
On Ron's face was a look that could put even Snape's most sour look to shame. That's because after flinging Alwyn Milthrope to what Ron had hoped was his death, the pest had just shaken it off! (Mind you, this wasn't the first time Alwyn had been thrown to the ground from such a height. After all, he had been annoying Ron for a few hours. This was just the first time anyone had saved him.) He had merely called his broom back to him before scurrying inside. Unfortunately, that wasn't the end of Milthrope. He returned with vengeance… and a bullhorn.
"Release your prisoner, Ronald Billius Weasley! Or face the power of Automatic Fanatic's finest!"
The redheaded wizard rubbed his temples, soothing the headache that had formed from 15 minutes of this nonsense. The twit was way too loud without the bullhorn; with the bullhorn was just torture. And for a few brief seconds, when Alwyn waited for a reply, Weasley considered surrendering. Anything to get that brat quiet. Heck, he might even stop throwing stuff at Malfoy long enough for the kid to put handcuffs on him. (Which Milthrope did, surprisingly, have. They were fur-covered and had the initials 'GMW' engraved on the metal chain.)
"Fine, you know what? I quit," Ron said with a sigh. The enthusiastic first-year beamed and starting flying closer to the window.
"I can understand why you'd do this," Alwyn said, in the best sympathetic voice he could manage. He had finally gotten the stubborn jerk to admit defeat! "After all, Harry is very attractive and cool while you're-" Alwyn cut off with a shake of his head. Best not to kick someone who's already down.
"I'm what," Ron asked, irritation becoming clear in his words once more. His jaw clenched and his face was turning a slight red shade.
"Uh, nothing," Milthrope said, recovering his compassionate tone, which was starting to sound more condescending than his intentions. "I just know that sometimes people might get jealous of stars, such as Harry, and do rash things. Like kidnap them."
Him jealous of his best mate!? Ron was pissed. He was probably even angrier than he was when Hermione was called a mudblood. He was so angry that, despite the fact that he had just spotted a heavy metal object to his left and Malfoy had just moved into an opportune spot to get hit, he couldn't even think to throw it at his enemy. Right now all he could focus on was wrapping his hands around that tiny neck and shaking the kid.
Weasley, busy trying to calm and convince himself that the kid wasn't worth it and that he was plenty attractive, didn't notice the other male inching closer on his broom until he hovered only a foot away. He did, however, see the pitying look the aforementioned male had on his face right away. Which, as the old saying goes, was the straw that broke the camel's back. Ron Weasley had a mental breakdown.
"Hey, -Alwyn, was it?-, come here," Ron growled, his long red hair covering his eyes as a dark aura radiated around him. The poor first-year's eyes widened and he made to dive down on his broom. Unfortunately, he wasn't fast enough and had the back of his shirt pulled. Ron yanked the boy through the window, purposely allowing the small head to whack the stone trim.
"Well," Pansy started, her voice a monotone. "Looks like Ronnie's got himself another captive."
"Yup," Hermione said, staring up at the tower lazily. She was a bit tired from having to save, singlehandedly, a bunch of dumb first-years who hadn't a lick of sense. "Should we help him?"
"Nah, let's deal with this after lunch. I'm starving."
Hermione nodded, brushing off her robe as she stood up. "You coming, Blaise?"
"His nipples, Hermione, were so yummy on my tongue," Blaise mumbled sadly, looking off into the distance. "And he would moan so loud if I bit them the slightest. And then-"
"I'll take that as a no," Hermione said hurriedly, grabbing Pansy's arm and pulling her from the scene as fast as possible. Ron's nipples were not exactly the best topic to discuss before lunch, for Merlin's sake!
OK, next part up soon (hopefully)! Harry realizes his feelings for Draco, an announcement is made, Ron either mends or breaks Blaise's heart in the second part. Review, even if it's to tell me I'm sucky.