Disclaimer: I do not own Angel, nor am I in any way affiliated with the show.
A/N: I started this with the intention of it becoming a sexy Angel/Spike rewrite of the second half of Season 5, and then eventually Buffy was going to show up and they'd become a threesome and all kinds of enjoyable naughtiness would ensue, but I never even got close to that far. So instead it's basically a two chapter exercise of me writing in Spike's voice because it's fun. Anyone feeling compelled to take it as a prompt and run with it, be my guest.
"It is you mate" Spike said matter of factly as he sauntered into Angel's living room.
Angel sat on the sofa staring into his glass, watching ice settle in his whiskey. He'd felt it when Spike entered the apartment, but he ignored it. He wasn't in the mood for another round just yet. He didn't want to admit it, but his pride was still hurt from the last fight. Plus his shoulder was killing him. Unfortunately when Spike started speaking, it made it impossible to keep ignoring him.
"What's me, Spike?" Angel asked, not looking up from his glass.
"You know, the Shanshu whatsit. The prophecy and the champion of the people and all that. Overheard you talking to Chuck after I left the room earlier. Worried maybe it's me and not you and what's your purpose if it's not fighting evil and such. Well, just ease your mind is all, because it's not me. It's you."
Angel continued brooding in the direction of his drink until Spike had finished his monologue. Finally he looked up at Spike and silently stared. Spike took this as a sign that he was not being kicked out just yet and walked over and sat down next to Angel. Angel didn't know where Spike was going with all this, what he was after, but for the time being he was too tired to care. He picked up the bottle of Jack Daniels hiding beside the sofa and placed it on the coffee table in front of Spike. Spike shot a confused look at Angel, but when he saw that Angel had returned to gazing intently at his glass, he shrugged, and took a swig. The two vampires sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity to Spike, but was actually twenty minutes.
"It doesn't really matter who the prophecy's about anyway" Spike finally broke the silence. It was clear that Spike wasn't leaving until he'd said everything he wanted to say, so Angel turned to face him, indicating that he go on.
"The thing of it is, it's not really about what happens during the apocalypse or the humany reward at the end. It's about the purpose, what you do today and what you're gonna do tomorrow and the day after. The non-apocalypse days." Spike wasn't sure why he was saying all this. He was only saying what he really believed, but he knew it's also what Angel needed to hear, which made it all the more confusing as to why he was saying it. But now that he'd started he couldn't very well stop. "Even if your soul's a curse, you've always been the one with a purpose. You fight everyday because you know you have to, doing what you know is right. The only purpose I ever had was Buffy."
At this Angel had had enough. "Get out Spike" he growled as he got up and started to walk away.
Spike stood and grabbed Angel by the shoulder, turning him back to face him. "Look, you're the one who let me start so you should bloody well let me finish."
Angel continued to glower but relaxed his arm and waited for Spike to continue.
"Right, all I'm saying is Buffy was my reason for fighting for the white hats to start and she was my reason for going after the soul and she was my reason for giving it all up in the end. And now that I'm back I'll fight on this side because my soul's telling me that's what I'm supposed to do, but when it comes down to it, I'm a good guy because of a girl. Even if she is the slayer and a hell of a girl."
"Spike, the point better be getting here soon" Angel tensed up again, starting to lose his patience.
"My point, mate, is that you're a good guy, a hero, a champion, whatever, because you want to help people. And the bloody Powers know that. They know it's you otherwise they wouldn't keep sending you those guides. You don't see them wasting any of their fancy vision seeing martyrs on me, do ya? I got my soul and I went straight back to follow the girl. And I couldn't even do that part. Went all batty first and had to have her save me before I could even get in the fight again. So that's how I figure it's gotta be you. Cause it sure as hell ain't me."
Angel sighed. "Yeah well, look at me now. I work for an evil law firm and my last guide gave birth to a fascist goddess and is now in a coma because I couldn't save her. And I don't see the Powers sending me another one." Angel was starting to shake with frustration. He could feel tears welling up and he couldn't think clearly enough to find a way to get Spike out of there before they started falling.
Spike was caught off guard by how much sympathy he was feeling for his grandsire, but it didn't change his natural instinct to try to piss Angel off whenever possible. "Yeah well, I'm sure one'll be along any day now. You never know. Maybe it's me."
His joke didn't illicit the response Spike was expecting. Angel's tears started to fall and his shoulders were shaking with his sobs. He sunk down to the floor and sat back on his feet. Now Spike couldn't fight the overwhelming urge to comfort his grandsire. He picked up Angel's glass and drained it before sitting down on the floor in front of him.
"Look mate..." Spike began, but Angel cut him off, reaching out for Spike's shoulders and pulling him towards him into a hug.
Spike was stunned for a few seconds before he realized what had just happened. Then he was stunned again when he realized he didn't feel the urge to pull away. Slowly he relaxed into Angel's embrace, bringing his arms up around him and gently rubbing his back as he sobbed.
After a few minutes Angel stopped sobbing. When he noticed that Spike was holding him and soothingly caressing his lower back, he panicked and pulled away. Before he could stand up, Spike's fingers were on his face, wiping away the lingering tears. The feeling against his skin was so comforting that Angel unconsciously sighed and leaned into Spike's touch.
"Are we doing this then?" Spike asked while letting his fingers linger on Angel's cheek.
"What? Oh, I...not if you don't..." Angel pulled back from Spike's touch and began to stand. "I didn't mean to...I'm sorry."
"No, I'm just saying...it's just, it's been a long time." Spike stood up and looked tenderly at Angel.
Angel fixed his gaze out the window for a moment while struggling with the thought of what could happen. In the past day his whole existence had been called into question. He felt like he was teetering back and forth on the edge of a cliff. And now, after everything, the only person standing there to catch him was Spike.