I'm glad you're all enjoying this story, its the reason I write. I may skip around in the story in future chapters while only alluding to Hueco Mundo arc events as this is not an action story, my focus is on Rangiku and Ichigo in a more light hearted fic. Please let me know what you all think of this. I've gotten quite a few positive reviews, so thank you all who took the time to show your appreciation. Keep em coming, I enjoy reading them!
Gagboy: Yes, this will be based on the manga, of course a few changes have to be made to make this story work.
I don't own Bleach, if I did the last 10 manga chapters would've gone MUCH differently. I'm still raging.
Ichigo and Rangiku were still relaxing in the bath and engaging in a heavy kissing session when a knock at the door alerted them to company.
"Ichigo, is that you in there?" came the voice of Rukia through the door.
"Damn" the teen whispered to his blonde companion. "She's here already, if she goes in my room and sees your clothes on the floor" he trailed off, letting the implications sink in.
"Lets just be thankful she wasn't outside the room when you were moaning ten minutes ago" Rangiku said quietly into Ichigo's ear, causing his skin to flush red. "Better answer her quickly before she decides to bust the door down."
"Ichigo?" came the voice again as Rukia knocked at the door.
"Sorry, yes I'm in here Rukia, I'll be done in a few minutes."
"Alright, let me know when you're finished so I can get washed up." The two occupants of the bath could hear the soft footsteps of someone walking away as Rukia apparently went to do something else.
Rangiku took the opportunity to pull in her new lover for another round of kisses, her mouth working its way down Ichigo's neck to his chest. While the sensations felt incredible to him, he was more concerned with smuggling Matsumoto to his room without being discovered, and before his family came home and made that almost impossible.
"We really should get out and try to make it to my room without being seen" the substitute shinigami said hesitantly, his body and his mind clearly torn on the issue.
"And here I was hoping for round two" Rangiku purred, her hands slowly sliding down his body towards his waist.
"You're insatiable. We just did it fifteen minutes ago!" Ichigo silently cursed his teenage hormones as even now she was managing to arouse him again so quickly after their last coupling.
"Don't worry, there will be plenty of time for us to do it again later. No school tomorrow afterall" she winked while standing up and grabbing her towel.
Ichigo could only groan. He swore to himself that Rangiku had every intention of wearing him out. Getting up and wrapping a towel around himself, he opened the drain on the bath and carefully checked the hall for signs of Rukia. Seeing none, he decided to take the chance.
"It's clear" he whispered.
Nodding, Rangiku followed Ichigo as he quickly dashed to his room. After they were safely inside, he stuck his head out of his door.
"Rukia! I'm out of the bath now. You can get in!"
"Alright, thank you" came the reply from downstairs.
Ichigo breathed a sigh of relief. He'd managed to sneak Matsumoto back to his room without incident. As he watched with fascination as she toweled off her amazing body, he had to wonder what was next. It was still early after all.
"Girls, I have to make a quick stop at a friends place, I'll only be a few minutes. You can wait in the car."
"Alright dad" came the soft reply of a tired Karin and Yuzu. While they enjoyed their usual Friday night out with their father, his antics over dinner and during their games of bowling usually left them exhausted.
Isshin could hardly contain his glee as he parked outside of Urahara's shop. As goofy as he was, one didn't become a taicho in the Gotei 13 without wit and talent. The older Kurosaki always had a plan. Stepping out of his car, he was greeted by his old friend and fellow taicho.
"Isshin, what can I do for you on this lovely evening." Urahara's trademark smile only increased the size of the grin on Isshin's face. Kisuke was always a willing partner in crime.
"It seems my son has been seeing a woman. Who I'm not sure, but I'm very curious as to her identity. In fact Yuzu caught Ichigo in bed with someone. The odd part is it's not Rukia, I thought for sure it would be her after all they've endured together. It is a father's duty to know such things isn't it? Especially when such activities could ruin his precious daughter's innocence."
"Indeed it is. That is quite an interesting mystery. Perhaps I should help you figure it out in the name of science?" The former head of the Research and Development Bureau hid his enthusiastic expression behind his fan and beckoned his old friend to enter the shop.
"What do you have in mind Kisuke?" asked Isshin as he took a seat at Urahara's table.
"I'm so glad you asked!" came the excited reply from one of the most prolific inventors in the history of Soul Society. "I have an invention that will work just perfectly for this little endeavor. I call it the 'Ghost Cam'."
"And what does this 'Ghost Cam' do Kisuke?"
"Why it's a flying camera of course! It locks onto a target's reiatsu and follows them from a distance. It is small, nimble, silent, and thanks to my own cloaking technology, very difficult to detect. It should have no problem following Ichigo around and finding out who he has been seeing." Urahara seemed downright giddy at the prospect. He was now just as curious as Isshin as to who could capture the heart of one of his favorite students.
"How long will it take for you to set all this up?"
"A few hours. Can you make it back here around midnight?"
Isshin's wide grin gave Kisuke his answer. The night promised to be interesting indeed.
"You want to go to a nightclub?" came the voice of one incredulous Ichigo Kurosaki as he looked up from his magazine. "How am I going to get in? I'm not exactly legal you know."
"Oh don't worry about that. I have my ways." The way she grinned at that statement made Ichigo nervous. "I want us to go out on a proper date. It'll be more fun then us laying on your bed reading all night. Besides, you have those new clothes just begging to be worn!"
"I don't know about this. I'm not convinced my dad isn't trying to spy on me. If I'm out all night who knows what he's going to do, and I don't know if I have enough money for it."
"Relax, I have plenty of money leftover for drinks. I'm sure we can avoid your dad too, he is only human."
"That's what I'm afraid of." Ichigo couldn't help but remember how this had all started the night before thanks to a bottle of sake and a deck of cards. He didn't think he could handle a repeat performance of the morning's antics no matter how good the sex was.
"Please?" Rangiku pursed her lips and pouted, trying to convince him. Ichigo couldn't help but think she looked incredibly cute when she did that.
"Alright we'll go for a bit, I can't stay out too late though" he said evenly, caving to her request. The teen actually felt better after giving in, and excitement started to build.
"It'll give me a chance to wear my new underwear!" Matsumoto happily exclaimed.
Ichigo could only groan at her response.
It was past ten when the shinigami duo made it one of the hotter nightclubs in town. Decked out in his new slacks, button down shirt, belt and some dress shoes, and combined with the toned body from fighting and training Ichigo looked like he was eighteen or nineteen instead of a high schooler. With a little gel to style his orange locks in just the right way he was feeling good, and more confident about his appearance then he had in some time.
Matsumoto's outfit was simply stunning. A mid thigh length black skirt and sandals showed off her toned legs, while a dark blue sleeveless top accentuated her impressive bust. Ichigo didn't know if he should be more impressed with how she looked in her outfit or the fact that someone designed a bra that could support her so well. He could already see the jealous looks from the other men in line for the club and they hadn't been there more then five minutes.
Thankfully Ichigo didn't need to present ID, the bouncer took one look at Matsumoto and let them both in without a word. Even after experiencing her charms first hand it amazed him how easily she got her way with men. Silently he wondered if she knew they would get in with no problems.
Ichigo was almost overwhelmed at the sights and sounds inside. The flashy neon lights, loud techno dance music, smoky atmosphere, and gigantic dance floor crammed full of people was a new experience for him. Matsumoto grabbed his hand and led him to the bar. Somehow he wasn't surprised.
"What would you like to drink Ichigo?" his companion said into his ear to help him hear over the dance music.
"I don't know, I've never had anything but a couple beers and some sake."
"My choice then."
Ichigo had a bad feeling about Matsumoto of all people picking drinks, but when she returned a moment later with two cocktails he let out a sigh of relief. The blonde smiled as she handed it to him, and watched as he took a swig of the liquor infused creation. He could feel the chilled substance slide down his throat, without the usual burn sake would cause. It tasted rather good, like a mix of fruit.
"This is really good." He had to admit, Matsumoto knew her alcoholic drinks.
"I'm glad you like it! I had them add a little strawberry just for you. Hitsugaya taicho would never come to a place like this or drink with me."
"I wonder why." The teen knew exactly why the white haired taicho would avoid her drinking sessions like the plague. In two days he'd gone from a free willed teen to her personal love slave and shopping bag holder, not that he was complaining about it.
"That's what I say to everyone!" Ichigo's subtle sarcasm was completely lost on her. "I mean we get pretty wild and crazy, but everyone has a good time. Usually no one even gets hurt."
"Usually? What the hell does that mean?"
"Well there was one time Hisagi got really drunk and mistook Yumichika for a woman and it ended up in a fist fight, and then there was the time Kira fell out of the window wearing nothing but a loincloth."
"And why was he wearing nothing but a loincloth?"
"Well the guys got into an argument over who had the better body so they stripped down and had me judge. I can't remember who won, that time ended up in a fight too" she spoke as if it was the most normal thing in the world.
Ichigo resisted the urge to slap his forehead. These were the people responsible for the safety of souls and the slaying of hollows? No wonder Aizen felt comfortable making his move.
"You don't remember who won huh?" Ichigo asked. He had to wonder who if anyone was his competition.
"Don't worry, if you had been there you would've won hands down! How about we head onto the floor for a bit?"
Before he could reply, Rangiku grabbed his hand and dragged him to the dance floor. It was packed, but people parted for the stunningly beautiful woman. When they found a tiny clearing she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close.
"May I have this dance?"
Urahara and Isshin huddled around a monitor while the former oversaw the last tests for his invention.
"How long till it's ready Kisuke?"
"Just a few more minutes to make the final adjustments and set a lock on your son's reiatsu" came the inventor's reply.
Isshin watched as his long time friend fiddled with the tiny device. Before long he heard a soft electronic humming as the machine came to life and took to the air.
"Alright it has a lock on his reiatsu, it will start tracking and move to intercept its target in a moment."
"Are you sure he won't notice it? I think he's a little paranoid now that he knows several people are on to him."
"Absolutely positive Isshin. Now we just wait a little longer, then sit back and enjoy the show."
Both men grinned like idiots as the camera zoomed out the window and started to relay images to the monitor. Soon they saw a nightclub pop up on the screen.
"Ichigo is in there?" Isshin asked, surprised by the venue. "How did he get in? He's still a minor."
"The Ghost Cam is reading his signature, and he's not hard to track with his constant leaking of spiritual pressure. This only makes it more mysterious, don't you agree?"
Isshin nodded his head, now more determined then ever to see who had made his son a man. They watched intently as the tiny flying camera zoomed in through the open door and started scanning. The images on the screen flickered and were full of static.
"This place is packed, all of the hundreds of tiny human reiatsu signatures and electronic equipment is interfering with the signal. It's going to be difficult to find him in here."
"I thought your inventions were foolproof" said a frustrated Isshin.
"They are, once they've been properly tested. This is the maiden flight. While we can't track him easily while he's in there, he has to leave sometime right? When that happens, we've got him. All we do is wait."
Isshin's grin returned in full force.
Matsumoto was impressed with Ichigo's dancing ability. At first it was a little awkward for him, but soon he let his body's natural rhythm honed from zanjutsu and hoho practice take over. The music was mostly face paced and the two moved to the flow for hours, her hands usually finding a spot on his waist. Ichigo blushed at first from holding the older shinigami so intimately in public and in such a revealing outfit, but the enjoyment he got from dancing with her had him over his nervousness in no time.
With the drinks flowing freely from the bar they settled into a comfortable pattern where they took turns leading the dance routine. When a slow song finally came on the club's stereo system after many fast paced dance beats, Rangiku wrapped her arms around him and put her head on Ichigo's shoulder.
"Are you having a good time Rangiku?" the teen asked, his hands softly rubbing her back as they continued to sway to the music.
"Very" she said into her partner's ear as she closed her eyes and nuzzled his neck, enjoying the feel of his warm skin against her.
Unlike before, the substitute didn't shy away from the feel of her soft body rubbing against him. He could see men around him with envious looks, each of them wishing they were in his position. It annoyed him greatly, but at the same time he couldn't fully fault them after his experience with her.
As the song came to a close and the two reluctantly pulled apart. Ichigo chose that moment to finally look at his watch. He couldn't believe how much time had passed since he arrived with the blonde goddess.
"It's after one o'clock already" Ichigo said, raising his voice above the sound of the music. "I can't believe how long we've been dancing."
"Well you know what they say, time flies when you're having fun. Lets grab another drink and then we can head out alright?"
Ichigo nodded and followed her off the dance floor and into the darker section of the club. Stopping at the bar with his partner, he watched as Rangiku ordered two drinks. She then pulled the teen to the edge of the bar where they'd have some room to enjoy themselves for a few more minutes before calling it a night. Before they could start talking however, one of the club's patrons approached them. He appeared to be in his early twenties and had short hair and wore a collared shirt.
"Hey babe, why don't you ditch this guy and come dance with me" the man spoke, his intoxication obvious as he slurred his words, the alcohol on his breath coming out with every syllable.
"No thanks, you're not my type" Rangiku managed to say while avoiding showing her disgust.
"No one says no to me. Come on now, ditch this loser and dance" he muttered while grabbing her arm and trying to lead her away.
Ichigo was furious at the brazen actions of this drunk. Before he could do anything to stop the guy from forcing himself on his date, Matsumoto did it for him. A fierce smack to the inebriated man's head had him howling as he let go to rub his face. Ichigo could see the rage come across his features as he recovered.
"You bitch!" he screamed and then lunged at Rangiku, intent on striking her back.
With as much experience as she had in the many bars of the Seireitei honed from hanging around the seedier areas, Matsumoto's next reaction was immediate and harsh. Grabbing her attacker's arm and twisting it, her other hand came up and connected with his jaw in a hard punch. Ichigo watched in amazement as the would be thug crumpled to the floor in a heap, knocked out cold. There was no time for him to celebrate as security rushed to the scene.
"Alright, what happened" asked one of the bouncers.
"This guy grabbed my date" Ichigo responded.
"Did you hit him?"
"No, my date did."
The bouncers looked in surprise at Matsumoto. She simply shrugged and smiled.
"Alright I'll give you a minute to down your drinks, but then I have to ask you to leave. Sorry but rules are the rules."
With a sigh Matsumoto downed her drink in a single gulp. It took Ichigo an embarrassing several moments more to do the same thing. The bouncers escorted them to the doors. His first time at a club and he'd been kicked out. Ichigo simply chalked it up to the perils of hanging out with the fukutaicho.
"We were leaving anyways Ichigo, so don't be disappointed. Of course, we can always go to another club tomorrow!"
"No, that's quite alright, once is enough for a weekend" Ichigo said hastily.
"Party pooper" Matsumoto replied as she walked up to him and grabbed his hand, holding it as they walked together. Ichigo thanked God that it was dark outside so no one could see his blush. Walking back to his home hand in hand they looked like a true couple.
It took them awhile to make it to the Kurosaki clinic. Ichigo sneaked through the front door expecting an attack from the old man, so he proceeded carefully. He was rather surprised when none came. When he made it to Karin and Yuzu's room he was able to peek inside and see the two of them asleep with Rukia sleeping on the bed Isshin had set up for her. Moving quietly down the hall he opened the window in his room and and let Matsumoto jump up to the second floor.
"I had a good time Rangiku" the teen smiled at her as he lay back on his bed. It had been an experience he would remember.
"I did too" she paused and looked at the clock. "It's still a little early for me to go to bed you know."
"Well what do you want to do?"
"Oh, I have some ideas" Matsumoto smirked, climbing on top of him and rubbing her breasts against him. "We never did have round two."
Truly she planned to wear him out.
Kisuke and Isshin had long since fallen asleep waiting for something to change, their backs against the wall as they rested in a sitting position, snoring softly. A sudden repeating beeping noise woke them up from the slumber.
"What the hell is that Kisuke? Has something happened?"
"Why indeed it has!" his friend grinned. "It appears your son has left the nightclub, and by the looks of things he's almost at your house. The camera is in pursuit."
Both men grinned like idiots and focused on the screen as the streets of Karakura flew by, awaiting a glimpse of Ichigo and his companion.
Ichigo found himself pinned to the bed, his arms above his head as Rangiku held his wrists. He had to admit she was deceptively strong. Of course he wasn't exactly trying hard to escape, although he would never admit it. Just the sight of her on top of him like that was arousing, and the shinigami had to try and shift himself to make space in his pants as they suddenly felt much smaller. Rangiku noticed almost immediately, and seductively wiggled her hips and ground against him.
"Something wrong Ichigo?" she smiled as she kept it up. "My, is that your Soul Pager in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"
"You're a cruel, evil woman Rangiku" the teen gasped out.
"But you like it."
"Nope, I can't hear you. I have no idea what you're talking about."
"So you're going to be like that Ichigo? Well fortunately I have ways to deal with you" she smiled evilly.
Not missing a beat the older woman lifted up her arms and pulled off her top, eliciting a groan from her victim. She was wearing one of her new bras that she'd picked out with Ichigo and with its transparency left little to the imagination.
"I told you going out would give me a chance to wear my new underwear" she leaned forward and whispered in his ear. "Do you like what you see?" Let it not be said the 10th's fukutaicho wasn't extremely persuasive when she wanted to be.
Ichigo wanted to give in, and quite badly at that. However after Rangiku had dominated him the last few days he felt it was his time to turn the tables on her.
"Nope sorry, I don't see anything" he said, looking away and trying to have some measure of control over the situation.
"Well then if your eyes aren't working, I'll just have to let you feel it."
Ichigo would have sat upright at those words if it wasn't for the fact that his date quickly unzipped his pants and found what he had been trying to hide.
"So if you can't see, then why are you like this?" Rangiku teased, grasping his manhood. She gently rubbed him before taking him in her mouth, forcing a moan from her new man. She caressed him with her tongue, licking him gently in an effort to drive him crazy.
"Feels good doesn't it Ichigo? Now go ahead and tell me how awesome and sexy I am and that you belong totally to me" she said softly, teasing him again.
"No way." Ichigo was trying his hardest to resist, a bead of sweat rolling down his forehead as he thought about baseball and anything else to get his mind off of what she was doing to him. He was a savior of Soul Society, slayer of hollows, and he'd defeated two taichos. He'd be damned if he'd just give in without a fight and make it easy for her. He truly liked her, but he was determined not to be so badly whipped.
"Still resisting? No wonder you managed to defeat so many high level shinigami. This calls for drastic measures!"
Ichigo couldn't help but watch as she took off her bra and exposed her chest to him. He didn't think the majestic site would ever get old. He hoped it never would.
Rangiku grabbed his member and slowly rubbed it against her breasts, using her soft flesh to bring him pleasure. She knew what her breasts did to men, she'd learned that lesson as young girl that developed earlier then her peers. A little smile, some flirting, and a peek at her cleavage got her whatever she wanted. Ichigo was different. Although he clearly enjoyed the site of her body once she'd shown him, he hadn't been one of those guys who tried to sneak peeks down her shihakusho when she was leaning over, or making crude comments. It was a major part of what endeared him to her. She had no doubt that if she ever needed his help he would provide it, with no strings attached.
"Rangiku, that feels incredible."
"Then say what I want to hear Ichigo."
The older shinigami was enjoying this almost as much as her partner. He was slick with her saliva, so it was no problem for Matsumoto to hold her breasts together and use them to stroke his member. The other day he was still a virgin. She could only imagine how erotic her actions looked to him. To make the seduction even more effective, he was big enough that her chest didn't envelop him completely so that she could lean forward and suck the tip while jerking him off.
"How does this feel Ichigo" she purred, meeting his eyes as he watched what she was doing.
"It feels amazing."
The fukutaicho smiled before taking him in her mouth again, sucking on him gently, using her tongue and breasts to drive him wild. When she heard him groan and twitch, and felt the spasms that indicated his approaching orgasm, she stopped and refused to let him finish. Her victim groaned in disappointment.
"If you want release, then you have to tell me what I want to hear."
"No!" he continued resisting, determined to fight a losing cause.
The blonde continued her assault, stroking him within her cleavage, and sucking at him until he was close and then stopping. Aizen himself would be hard pressed to come up with a more effective method even with Kyoka Suigetsu she thought as she kept up her torturous actions. Finally, after the fifth time she stopped short, Ichigo waved the white flag.
"Okay, okay, you're awesome Rangiku, please let me finish, I can't take it anymore" the teen pleaded.
"But that's not all you're supposed to say" she fired back before sucking him back into her mouth, nearly bringing him off, but holding him on the edge.
"Rangiku you're really awesome and sexy and I belong to you" his voice nearly breaking as he spoke.
Mentally she cheered her victory and kept good on her word. It wasn't even ten seconds later that she heard him stifle a moan as his manhood throbbed and fired its seed into her waiting mouth. She eagerly swallowed what she could savoring his taste, but after teasing him for half the night and torturing him so long her lover had built up quite a supply. As his orgasm slowed she pulled him from her mouth, the last few drops landing on her breasts where she used his member to rub them into her skin while he watched. It was such an incredibly erotic sight to the wide eyed shinigami that he didn't even soften after such a tremendous orgasm.
Rangiku gasped when he rose off the bed and practically tackled her. If he'd been forced to say that humilating line to her, he was damn sure going to make sure she said the same thing back to him.
"My turn" he grinned, taking off his shirt and pants before stripping her of her skirt.
Rangiku moaned loudly when he flipped her on her back and buried himself between her legs, licking her already wet opening built up from the excitement of sucking him off. When he felt she was sufficiently wet for him Ichigo had her get on her hands and knees. He rubbed himself up and down her slit before pressing himself inside his new 'owner,' drawing gasps from them both.
Ichigo did know that while he was a nice guy, turnabout was fair play. He was determined to make her say it. That she belonged to him. He didn't understand this sudden need, this desire to hear those words come from her mouth like they had come from his. It wasn't pride, so was it something more? Was he already developing deep feelings for her? In less then two days he'd experienced so much with her, things he had shared with no one else, and he couldn't deny he wanted to share more.
Over and over Ichigo thrust inside her, her hot walls clutching at him with the same ferocity with which he was pounding her. They were almost like two animals. It was hard, yet passionate. The substitute shinigami could swear it felt even better then the first time they had sex.
On the other side, Rangiku was holding on for dear life as she moaned and clutched at his sheets. No one had ever made her feel like this. Ichigo was a natural at everything he applied himself to. Gone were the earlier inhibitions, the care or concerns that someone might hear them. The sound of flesh smacking together filled the room, and neither one cared. Right now they simply needed each other and release.
As he brought her closer to the brink of orgasm, Ichigo slowed his thrusts. He smiled when he heard his lover grunt in disappointment. He picked up speed again, then slowed. It was a good thing he'd already had two orgasms that day, or there was no way he would have been able to hold out to tease her like this.
"Rangiku, tell me how awesome and sexy I am, and that you belong to me" the teen said, attempting to tease her back.
"Ichigo you're awesome and sexy, and I belong to you" she freely admitted, completely stealing his thunder.
"What? You're gonna say it that easily?" So stunned was he that momentarily he stopped his thrusting.
"I see no reason not to tell you how I really feel, even though I teased you into saying it earlier" Matsumoto replied, looking back over her shoulder and smiling at him. "I like you, a great deal actually" she continued before rocking her hips back and forcing him deep inside her.
Ichigo groaned at her response. It wasn't what he was expecting, but he was satisfied none the less. If anything, she knew how to keep him on his toes. No wonder she got away with murder where Hitsugaya was involved.
They continued to rut against each other, Matsumoto's large breasts swaying every time he slammed into her. Before long they were both on the verge of climax.
"Ichigo, I'm gonna" she gasped before being cut off.
"Me too Rangiku" Ichigo moaned.
With one final squeeze setting him off he exploded in his lover as she reached her own orgasm. Matsumoto had to bite down on his sheets to keep herself from letting out a scream that would have surely woken everyone in the entire house as her insides contracted around him, the pleasure shooting through her like a bullet. That would have been all they needed, to have Rukia and Ichigo's sisters come running in and watching in horror as they finished their orgasms.
Ichigo barely remained upright as the post orgasm head rush caught him. Yet again she had proven to him how amazing she was. He honestly couldn't picture it getting any better.
"That was unbelievable" was all the blonde could say about the experience as she panted and caught her breath.
Ichigo's brain was so fried at the moment he couldn't even come up with a coherent response as he pulled out of her and collapsed on the bed next to her. He managed to lean over and kiss her before his body momentarily shut down and refused to move.
The two of them laid like that for several minutes of complete bliss before Rangiku managed to lean over and kiss his neck.
"Don't forget to set the alarm clock."
Ichigo's eyes flew open and he quickly followed her advice before snuggling up to her and falling asleep.
"The signature is coming from Ichigo's room, and its fluctuating wildly. I wonder what they could possibly be doing" Urahara said with enthusiasm, a giant perverted smile stretched across his features. As he maneuvered the camera into position to get a shot for Isshin and himself to watch, a feminine voice startled him. So focused was he on his task he didn't even notice Yoruichi's approaching reiatsu.
"What are you two up to this late at night?" she said, rubbing the sleep from her eyes.
"Oh nothing, its just that my son has apparently found a woman and has been seeing her in secret and we're going to be using a camera to spy on them since they're alone together in his room late at night" Isshin replied as if it was absolutely normal behavior for a father.
"Oh this I have got to see" the dark skinned Goddess of Flash grinned, her features matching Urahara's perverted look. If only Ichigo knew his father and two mentors would be watching his sexual exploits with Rangiku, he'd want to crawl into a hole and die.
Urahara used the controls to guide his ghost cam through the house and directly in front of Ichigo's door while Yoruichi and Isshin watched in glee. He pressed a button and camera cloaked itself while using a tiny retractable arm to deftly open the door a crack and slip inside before closing it just as stealthily. All three eyes widened by what they saw, a slight trickle of blood coming from the noses of Urahara and Yoruichi.
They could see Ichigo behind some well endowed woman, pounding her with reckless abandon. Suddenly Isshin's eyes caught a detail the others missed. While he couldn't see her face, he noticed the very familiar chain hanging down between her breasts.
"No" Isshin said softly as the camera went for a face shot. "Please god no" he moaned as his smile disappeared, the camera zooming in. "NOOOOOOO!" he practically yelled as the camera was finally in a position to catch the face of the woman his son was currently hammering with fury, revealing her to be one Rangiku Matsumoto.
Urahara and Yoruichi sat in stunned silence for a moment before they burst into an uncontrollable bout of hysterical laughter.
"Oh wow" Yoruichi started. "The apple sure doesn't fall far from the tree. Definitely not what I expected. If not Rukia I thought it would be Orihime or that Tatsuki girl he grew up with."
Urahara laughed for several more moments in shock before calming himself and giving his old friend a glance full of pity before forming a sentence in his mind.
"So Isshin, how does it feel to know your son is having sex with your former seated officer and old ex-girlfriend?"
"This isn't happening, this isn't happening" Isshin simply repeated to himself in denial. "Kisuke please tell me this is all an elaborate joke or a bad dream."
"Sorry" was all the scientist could say.
"What the hell am I going to do?" Isshin mumbled as he got up and slowly left.
Yoruichi just watched intently as her student with the hot body had sex with a woman that unfortunately, was not her.
"I wonder where he learned that. Give you any ideas Yoruichi?" Urahara winked at her, hoping the nature of the video would put his old friend and lover in the mood.
"Well we were alone together in the old training ground with a hot spring for three days Kisuke, surely you don't think shunpo was the only thing I taught him do you?"
Urahara quickly joined his friend across the room as they silently wept together.
Yoruichi grinned at her brilliant lie.
"That'll teach em to spy" she said as she grabbed some popcorn from the nearby table and continued to watch the action.
HAHAHAHA yes, yes I am an evil evil man. Poor Ichigo. Poor Isshin. Plenty of humor ahead. Sorry for taking so long on this, I've been extremely busy. Love it? Hate it? READ AND REVIEW!