Disclaimer: Still nothing mine
A/N: Sorry for the long delay and thanks for your reviews and alerts! I edited the first chapter a bit, mostly typos though! Here's the last part. Enjoy!
Unbetaed, so mistakes are fair game!
Part Two: ~~~John Sheppard~~~
There are some nights when I just can't fall asleep, no matter what I do.
Those nights are mostly the consequences of calm and peaceful days. Or in other words, days without a mission. When we're not off-world, fighting aliens or the resident fauna, I'm stuck with paperwork. Which I hate with a passion. Such days usually leave me with a sense of ineffectiveness and an huge amount of spare energie.
During such days, my sparring sessions with Teyla and Ronon tend to be a little bit longer and harder than usually. I can only guess that the two of them are as frustrated with such days as I am.
The sparring sessions help, but they are not nearly enough. My mind is fuzzy with weariness, while my body just can't seem to shut down. Literally.
I never really noticed before, but Rodney told me one day that I twist and turn when I'm not sleeping. That's why, although I'm wide awake right now, I try to lie as still as possible and to keep my breathing low and even.
I'm not the only one who has some odd sleeping habits in this room. When Rodney is asleep, he is always in motion. One second he is lying on his stomach and the next he is abruptly sprawled out on his back. And before you know it, he is suddenly lying on his side, stealing your blanket because it's tangled up between his legs, and kicking you out of bed.
It's actually kinda frustrating to sleep besides Rodney but there are also little things that make it absolutely worth it. For example when he practically drags you on top of him because he mistakes you for the blanket or when he begins to murmur in his sleep. Things like "No Radek that's my device. I found it first." or just a wistful "Hmm....coffee".
I will never ever tell him that, because Rodney would eat me alive if I did, but I think that he can be extremely adorable when he's like this.
But he is not like this right now.
He is neither moving nor talking about coffee, and that's how I know that he's not sleeping anymore. Rodney is only ever still in bed when he is awake and doesn't want to wake me.
I don't want Rodney to know that I'm already awake too and that I know that he is watching me. He would blush and stutter and end up insulting me and my intelligence to distract me from his embarrassment, and although that can be quite amusing, I don't want to upset him. He is never able to fall asleep after one of his rants.
I listen closely and I am relieved to discover that his breathing is normal and considerably calm. I guess it's safe to assume that he is not awake because he had a nightmare.
I'm grateful for the nights when Rodney can sleep without being reminded of that man, because, in those nights, I'm not reminded of him either.
I always lie awake when I've managed to lull Rodney back to sleep and remember how I found the two of them and the short hour where I hadn't known what Jackson had exactly done to Rodney. The worst and longest hour in my whole life. I hadn't been able to think about anything else than what this could mean for Rodney and also, a little bit selfishly I admit, what this could mean for me. Whether Rodney would be able to accept my feelings after something like this. I had been barely able to debrief Elizabeth after we left the infirmary. It had been impossible to concentrate on anything else than Rodney. I had become more and more irritable until I finally snapped at Elizabeth for asking "pointless questions". That had been the moment when we decided to postpone the briefing until the next day.
I'm still embarrassed about my little outburst but Elizabeth acts as if it never happened. She is far more understanding than one would think, and also far more observant than Rodney and myself ever thought possible...
She knows about Rodney and me.
I have absolutely no idea how she figured it out, though. A week after our first night together, Elizabeth had asked Rodney and me to stay behind after a debriefing.
She had mustered us for a few seconds before she'd lapsed into a long-winded speech. How she is "okay with it" and how "truly happy" she is for us, but that we also need to be careful and that we can't let our "new and blossoming relationship" get in the way of our work.
Elizabeth had finished with a smile. I could just stare at her while Rodney had spluttered and looked like he was about to suffer a stroke.
We'd been really careful to act professional and as if nothing had changed between us. Well, outside of our quarters at least. But while the others didn't seem to suspect something, we apparently hadn't been able to fool our boss. Sometimes I think we never had a chance to begin with, considering that her speech that day begun with the words "Finally! You two had me worried for a while...".
Like I said: This woman can still surprise you...
Rodney suddenly heaves a sigh besides me. That actually worries me. He never makes any sounds when he's lying awake. Either he didn't notice what he just did or he's more upset about something than I thought. Either way, I think it's time to let Rodney know that I'm awake.
"Rodney? Is everything alright?"
He flinches a little bit as if I startled him, and turns his head to look at me. God, his eyes are so blue, it's almost ridiculous. Especially when the moon is the only source of light in the room. They are almost glowing...
"Yeah. Just can't sleep, that's all."
He sounds defeated and tired. I hate it to see him like this, but fortunately I just have to lift an arm to make it all better again. "C'mere."
A few seconds later and he is lying half on top of me with his head resting on my shoulder. I really like that position. His weight is just enough to make me aware of my own body under his and to make me feel... alive.
I rub his back like I have done many nights before and feel how he begins to relax against me. "Better?"
He hums in reply but I think it sounds more like he's purring and I have to resist the urge to snicker. He wouldn't appreciate that. Rodney can be quite insecure when he's not working on an ancient device or saving the city from certain doom. I realized long ago that Rodney is actually a walking bunch of contradictions and not nearly as arrogant as he appears to be. Especially when it comes to relationships.
"Good." I take his hand and kiss it softly before we intertwine our fingers. Before Rodney I had never been the guy to hold hands or to cuddle, but it feels right with him. Many things suddenly feel right with him.
We will stay like this for the rest of the night. It is odd but Rodney never squirms or shifts when he's lying in my arms. The only movement he makes is to tighten his grip on me or to scoot closer as if he's trying to savor my body heat. I want to believe that it's because he feels safe with me, even unconscious. That he doesn't need to consantly move anymore because he knows that I'm nearby and that it's okay to lie still.
The idea manages to send a pleasant jolt through my body. I can hear a quiet yawn before I feel how Rodney's breath becomes deep and steady.
And that's when I'm finally able to fall asleep.
A/N: Many of the topics that I approached in this two-shot will most certainly reappear in the sequel(btw, plot bunnys anyone?). I'm working on it guys but it's going slow since I'm still busy with my NCIS story. And I'm just assuming that they have something like a moon where they are right now, okay?
Hope you enjoyed this tag. Please review and tell me what you think!