I heard the scream come from my mother's mouth from my room. I was currently under my bed, iPod at full volume, Disturbed's Land Of Confusion pumping through my ears. I flinched; soon Phil would stop with my mother and move onto me.

When I was just four years old my mother and father split up, then when I was seven my mom married Phil. At first everything went great. But when I turned fourteen, I found out that Phil was beating my mom. I told him to stop, he didn't. He just got a new punch bag. Me. Of course it wasn't long until he started to do other things to me as well. He raped me and told me how worthless I was and I got really depressed.

Anyway, back to that night. So my mother screamed and then the front door slammed shut. I rolled out from my hiding place and collected my first aid kit from my loose floor board hiding place.

I raced down the stairs and whimpered slightly at the sight of my mom lying on the floor in a pool of her own blood.

"Mom!" I gasped. "Can you hear me?" She groaned.

"Bella, I need you to listen to me very carefully, ok?" I nodded, tears sliding down my face. "I need you to leave here. I'm dying Bella and I need to know you're safe. Go get my purse from upstairs, use my card and get all the money out of it, you know the pin. Go in my closet, at the back one of the panels is loose, take it off and take the shoe box out and... Just look at what's inside. Pack a bag and go live with your dad," Her voice was growing weak and she was starting to choke on her words. "I know that I said your dad didn't want anything to do with you but that was a lie. He loves you Bella, I just didn't want you to leave me. I'm a terrible mother and I know I can never make it alright but this is the last thing I can do for you so please, go, and don't ever come back. Oh God!" She whimpered the last part in pain.

"It's ok mom, I forgive you. I wouldn't have left you anyway. I love you." She smiled at me.

"I love you to, now go!" And then she died, I grabbed my guitar and laptop and threw them into the trunk of my car. After grabbing the first clothes I laid my hands on, and packing all my music and art supplies, I then went and got the shoebox from in the closet, I grabbed my car keys. I ran back to the kitchen for one last goodbye.

I drove out of the street like a mad woman on crack. I was crying so hard I couldn't see the road in front of me. I made it to the airport without crashing. I then realised I wouldn't be able to buy my own ticket so it looked like I was driving to Forks. What fun.

I was still driving eight hours later and I had only stopped in that time for gas. I decided to pull over in a service station. I decided that I also needed get some make up on to cover all the bruises. The amount I would need was astonishing. I had two options; I could go really heavy on the foundation, and act really preppy. Or, I could go emo and cover myself in white powder. I decided to go emo, that was how I was feeling and I was naturally quite so I went into a nearby store and bought black hair dye and a ton of mascara.

The checkout clerk looked at all the bruises littering my arms and face. I just glared at him and he quickly asked for my money and then I was finished.

I walked into the bathroom and dyed my hair over the sink. Once I'd finished I started to put on my makeup, it took over an hour but I decided it was worth it for more than one reason. Of course my new look covered my violent past up extremely well and I liked my new hair colour. It also made me look completely different; anyone looking for me wouldn't be able to pick me out of a crowed now. I emptied the contents of my bag out on the floor; I was still wearing the same clothes that I had been wearing when I held my mother for the last time. They were caked with blood. I groaned. Trust me to only pack my tightest skinny jeans and a miniskirt, which happens to be the only skirt I own, that is just my luck. Luckily I had a pair of not to tight footless tights. I quickly got changed and slipped of my jacket, the top underneath was still blood free. I threw the blooded clothes away before hitting the road once more.

I got to Portland and decided to ring my dad. I opened the shoe box with trembling hands. I went to the oldest looking ones, took one last deep breath, and started to read.

After I had read all the letters, some I even read twice, I rang my dad.

"Hello, Charlie Swan." Came the gruff voice of a man.

"H- Hello. It's Bella." My voice was no more than a whisper.

"Bella? Is it really you?" His voice was like a child on Christmas.

"Hey dad, look, I'm sorry I haven't been in touch before now. Mom kept all the letters from me. I just found them the other day and I got really mad at her and stormed out. I was wondering if the offer to come and live with you was still open?"

"Of course it is Bella! Wait till I get my hands on Renee! She has no right!"

"It's ok dad, I've cut all ties from her and Phil now, I just want to get on with my life. So, I'm in Portland at the moment. I can make it to Forks, but I don't know where to go from there."

"Ok, go to the police station in Forks. I'm the Chief of police. Just ask for me at the desk." I could tell he was excited by the way he was rushing all the words. I laughed, he sounded a lot nicer than Phil, then again most people did.

"Ok dad, chill! I'll be there in a couple of hours."

"Ok, I'll see you soon. Oh do you want me to enrol you to the high school?"

"Yes please, bye dad."

"Bye sweetie." He hung up. I took another deep breath and smiled. I now had a roof over my head and didn't have to worry about Phil or James. The mention of James made me shiver and I remembered the first time I'd met him.

Flash back.

I walked into the crowded room and smiled at each of my friends. It was the first party of the year and after much convincing on my friends part I had agreed to go.

"Hi." A guy had come and stood next to me as all my friends drifted off in different directions.

"Hey." I replied, I didn't like this guy, he was just to close and he stank of alcohol.

"So baby, I was thinking, you and me. Your just so dam hot." He was slurring his words and couldn't stand up straight.

Ok, to cut a long story short, he beat and raped me before he said that I now belonged to him and that I was a cheap slut and that I would only ever be treated (A/N is that the right word?) like one.

That carried on until I left.

End Flash back.

I smiled to myself as I hit a very long, empty stretch of road. I went from seventy to almost two-hundred in the space of six seconds. I love to drive fast.

Driving fast is like my own version of cutting, or drugs, or cliff diving. I have to focus solely on not crashing. I don't have room in my head to remember. And the adrenaline! The high I get from driving like a girl with a death wish is out of this world.

So, I sped down the road until I reached the beginning of thick forest, I saw the first bend and slowed right down, I wasn't about to risk someone else's life over my high. I made it round the bend, but like after every adrenaline rush, I found I needed to calm down. I pulled into the side of the road and rested my head on the top of the steering wheel.

After a few moments and a couple deep breaths, I was ready to set off again. Unfortunately, my car wasn't.

A/N So, the first chapter!!! What do you all think??? I really value your opinion! Say if it's good, bad. Shout at me with your cap's, complain at me, flame me. I really don't mind, just please tell me why it's crap, or why your flaming me!

Luv you all,



P.S Thanks to my amazing Beta Jackie_C_23! You rock!!!