Now And Always

By Rakurai-Arashi

He admired Kakashi for his devotion to his fallen friends, he really did. Yet sometimes Genma wished he would just leave the memorial stone in the morning so he could wallow in his own misery. Alone.

"Here again, Genma?" His voice was muffled by the mask, as usual. He didn't even turn to look at the other Shinobi.

"I could say the same for you." Genma had white roses with him. Kakashi sighed and turned around.

"It doesn't get any easier." He wanted to tell Genma that yes, it did get easier. But he didn't want to lie, and he was sure Genma already knew.

"Yeah," Genma bit down on his senbon. "I know." They parted ways, both hiding their pain.

He kneeled down in front of the stone, laying the flowers in front of it.

"Morning, Hayate." Genma felt the wind pick up slightly, as if Hayate was saying hello. He smiled slightly.

"It has been two years since you've passed on. Like Kakashi says, it doesn't get any easier." Genma hung his head, ashamed. Yugao was Hayate's lover, not him. But he was the one who was suffering the most. Even after all this time, it still hurt like hell. Waking up and just knowing he was never going to see Hayate again. He'd loved Hayate so much, but Hayate wasn't gay. Hayate didn't love him as a lover. A best friend, a brother maybe, but never a lover. At times it made him angry, it wasn't fair. Hayate loved him, but he wasn't in love with him.

"What a fucking tease." He mumbled quietly. His fingers traced Hayate's name, a tear falling down his cheek.

He unwillingly remembered all of things he and Hayate did. The long nights they went out drinking with Raidou. The missions that went well. The missions that didn't go well. Hearing about Hayate's body being found. The shock, the pain, the anger. Hayate had deserved so much better than to be killed by some traitor.

"Why? Why Hayate?! Was I just not good enough? What more did you want from me huh?!" The wind picked up again, gently caressing his skin.

"I'm sorry. I didn't, mean in it." He wiped the tears away and stood up. Smiling slightly. "Just hurts to much sometimes."

"Bye Hayate. I, love you. Now and always."

A/N: I do not own Naruto! And I know, I keep putting up short one-shots and not updating my other stories. I'm sorry. But I had to write this.