A/N: Musical Inspirations: Swallowed in the Sea - Coldplay
-To get the feeling I want I basically use one or two songs that convey the emotion I'm wanting to convey and I put in on repeat until I need a new emotion. At the beginnig of each chapter I will put my musical inspiration(s) and if you like you can download them and use them as background music for your reading.
Note: I know I have not gotten very far with My Immortal; I'm blocked on that one so I started this one - My Immortal WILL be continued soon, but it will not be a very long fic, it was never intended to be. This one should be at least as long as Broken and I hope you like it as well as you liked Broken. 112 is an original idea as far as I know... I've actually stopped reading fanfiction (other than Beta-ing a few) so that my ideas will most certainly come from my own head.
Big Girls Don't Cry
I cried when I found out the news. I knew this was an excellent opportunity for Charlie, and all through dinner I kept a polite smile plastered on my face as I chocked down my meatloaf and mashed potatoes. I listened intently as he told me all about our new house, his new job and my new school… all of which was over two-thousand miles away, two thousand, two hundred, and twenty six miles to be exact.
After dinner, Charlie, thankfully, offered to clear up and do the dishes. He only offered to do them every once in a great while, so I was really grateful that this time was one of those. I went upstairs and grabbed my bag and headed to the bathroom; I needed a shower, I needed the heat, the rhythmic pounding of water on my back, my shoulders, my head; and I cried. I cried until no more tears would come.
I had lived here in Forks with Charlie, my dad, ever since I was nine. Up until then, I had lived with my mom, Renee; she and I had lived in Phoenix, Arizona, but when I was eight and a half she found a lump in her breast. Her doctors told her not to worry, that they were sure once they got her into treatment she would be fine and recover well. Unfortunately they were too late; the cancer had spread too much too fast. She died seven months later and I was sent to live with my only relative, my dad, Charlie.
Over the past seven years I had made a few friends, not easy for me, and now I would have to give them up and start all over for my last two years of high school. I remember how I felt when I had first moved here to Forks, it had been like an alien planet. It took me a while to get used to all the green, the rain and the cold. At least in my new home it would not rain so much, the sun would be present during the summer months and I could rid myself of the bulky raincoat I had to use here for the majority of the year.
I wasn't too thrilled about the new town's nickname, however. 'The Windy City' just didn't hit me as an easy place to reside.
After my shower I gathered my things, checked my face in the mirror and rushing back to my room. I put away my bathroom bag and climbed into bed. I couldn't cry anymore, but the feeling of despair inside would not let me be. I picked up the phone next to my bed and dialed Angela's number. Her voice was slightly groggy sounding as she muttered a 'hello.'
"Hey Ang, sorry, did I wake you?" I asked, knowing full well that I must have.
"Yeah, Bell, but its ok, what's up?" She asked regaining her composure.
"I'm moving next week… I just found out. Charlie got a job as chief of police… in Chicago." The tears began to roll down my cheeks again as I thought of not being able to pick up the phone and call Angela anytime I needed an ear or a shoulder to cry on.
"Oh, Bella… I'm so sorry. I can't imagine you not being here for the rest of high school." She said.
"Me either. I can't stand the fact that you'll be so far away, we won't even be able to talk every day." I said, my voice beginning to get hoarse.
We talked for a while before agreeing to skip lunch at school the next day to come up with a plan for staying in touch during my exile. I croaked out a watery 'goodbye' before finally hanging up the phone. I tossed and turned in my bed that night, unable to sleep.
The next few days were no better; I walked about in a state of permanent mope. I just couldn't believe that after finally getting comfortable here in this tiny green town that I would likely not see it again before I went to college.
Angela and I had promised each other years ago that we would attend the same college so neither of us would have to start the first day all alone. We had agreed to this pact after she had befriended me on my first day of school here in Forks. I had opened up to her and told her how awkward I felt because I didn't know anybody. We had recently decided upon Washington State because it would accept both of us and wouldn't be as demanding as someplace like Harvard or Yale, plus, we could stay close to home and visit our families on the weekends if we wanted.
The week passed quickly and before I knew it, moving day had come. A large group of guys came in and took our packed boxes and loaded them onto a mayflower truck and left us looking at an extremely empty house. The bareness of the walls and floors were depressing enough in themselves. I grabbed the suitcase I had packed last night and turned to take one last look at my room.
'Goodbye blue walls, goodbye drafty window.' I said mentally. I would miss that window most of all, but just why I could not say; it was far from perfect. It was drafty, it didn't lock and I couldn't seem to get it to open no matter how hard I tried. But for some reason I felt it held something that I would most certainly regret to miss.
I walked with Charlie through the house once more, he, checking to make sure we hadn't missed anything, me, quietly thinking my goodbyes to the only other home I had ever known.
We climbed into Charlie's old navy blue suburban, suitcases loaded, and pulled out of the driveway for the last time. I couldn't help the single tear that fell from my eye as we drove away from my house and out of Forks, Washington forever.
Our first night on the road was spent in Helena, Montana. Charlie was considerate enough to have booked our motel stays along the way with two single rooms that adjoined. Like me, Charlie was a private person, neither of us talked very much, and other than sharing a dinner table every night, pretty much kept to ourselves.
The next night in Sioux Falls, South Dakota, while Charlie and I were waiting on the dinner we had ordered at some place called Phillips Avenue Diner, he asked me if he had told me about our new house in Chicago. Of course he had, last week at dinner when he broke the news of our impending move, but I had been so distraught and focused on not making a scene that I realized I hadn't heard a word he had said.
"Sure, dad, but tell me again. Maybe you think of something you forgot last week." I said trying to sound genuinely interested.
"Well, Bells,' he began, 'like I said, you get the room on the front of the house, your window faces the street. It's a pretty nice view I hear. The realtor said that room would be ideal for a teenage girl, got a big window seat or something." He said uncomfortably.
Charlie was not good with detailed descriptions of anything, much less the room for a teenage girl, especially one he had not personally seen.
"Sounds great, dad," I said trying to sound encouraging and hopeful.
Charlie nodded his head, "I did tell you that you're getting your own bathroom didn't I?" he said, obviously trying to remember if he had shared that particular piece of information before this moment.
"I don't think so, dad…seems like I'd remember a detail as important as that!" I added with a little laugh.
Charlie chuckled and that seemed to be the end of our conversation. Our dinner arrived shortly and we spent the rest of the meal in near silence.
The next day we got to our new house on Masen Lane. It was dark when we arrived and we were exhausted from the three day drive so we decided to just call it an early night. The movers had come in, set up necessary items like beds, put large furniture in an obvious place, unloaded all of the boxes, etc., and left.
I slept on my naked, unmade bed in my jeans and t-shirt, pausing only long enough to kick off my sneakers and find my pillow in the madness of boxes that was my room.
The morning broke bright and sunny. It was an odd sight to see the sun breaking through the clouds this early in the year. In Forks we only saw the sun once July hit, and that was a rarity even then. Here it was only late April and already the sun was making a glorious appearance. I could get used to that.
As I opened my bleary, overtired eyes, the first thing I noticed, other than the sunlight breaking through my window, was the color of my room. Soft sage green with white trim, the floors were a deep, cherry colored hardwood.
I had barely had the chance to register the soft, calming colors of my room when I heard a light tapping on my door.
"Bells, it's after ten, you alright?" Charlie's half worried voice came through the cracks of my doorway.
"I'm fine, dad, just sleeping off the three day, leg numbing ride." I answered back. "Be down in a minute." I yelled as I heard his footsteps walking away.
I ran my hand through my hair and walked sleepily down stairs. Every wall in the house except for the four in my bedroom and adjoining bathroom were painted a bright vibrant rainforest green. Suddenly I knew why the poor realtor had been so leery of suggesting this house, and why Charlie had been so anxious to buy it.
It reminded him and me as well, of Forks. It was the color that permeated the entire region of the Olympic Peninsula in Washington. At some level I was sure that this was unhealthy. But in a strange way it was comforting.
"Morning, Bells,' Charlie said as I entered the kitchen. 'Got you a little something to make the move a little easier; Next weekend we'll go looking for you a vehicle to get you around; not sure I want you on the public transportation system here if it's not necessary."
I looked at the box sitting next to Charlie on the dining table. It was flat looking and longish… like a large photo album or something.
"Ch- Dad, you didn't have to get me anything, really." I said. I hated getting gifts; it just made things all squishy and awkward inside me… I didn't like outwardly dealing with emotions.
I opened the box and, to my surprise, it was a brand new laptop. I was speechless.
"I thought it might make it easier if you could talk to Angela every now and then. I didn't expect it would come so early; the postman dropped it off just before I came up to get you. I got a good deal on the internet service when I had the cable turned on." Charlie said all in a whoosh of words as if he wouldn't be able to get it out if he didn't rush through it.
"Dad thanks. You have no idea…" I stammered.
"Yeah, Bells… I do. I know how tough it is to be the new kid, especially at the end of the school year." He said.
"Well I'm off to the station." He said picking up his belt and gun from the table.
"It's Saturday, Dad. I thought you weren't going in until Monday." I said, puzzled that he would be so eager to get to work so soon after arriving.
"Yeah, well, I got to pick up my new cruiser. See my office, things like that." He said as he walked out the door.
I took my new computer up to my room and turned it on. After setting up an email account I grabbed my address book, typed in Angela's email address and started my first of many messages to her.
Dear Ang, guess what? My dad got me a new laptop! Can you believe it? Now we can talk every day! I miss you so much already. Hope Jessica is treating you well. Talk to you later. Email me back as soon as you get this! Lots of love, Bella.
I shut the laptop and began the daunting job of unpacking and moving in.
End of Chapter 1 - Let me know if you like it so far; the more reviews I get the faster I can post my next chapter!