I totally don't own our beloved Yuuki and Zero. Hino Matsuri totally DOES. Just borrowing them for a minute.

This is my take on what would happen if we had an equation like: Yuuki + Zero + Liquor=???

Rated 'T' for the mention of alcohol consumption and slight teenage mischief.

So here we go with another Zeki oneshot. WARNING: Fluff Alert! Hope you enjoy! Please review, if you're so inclined.


Another Saturday night, the moon shining down upon the hapless inhabitants of the Cross Academy. Yuuki's eyes roamed the corridor, though the object of her search was nowhere to be found. Where was he, anyway?

She sighed. The accursed enigma known as Zero Kiryu always managed to disappear without a trace whenever she was intent on keeping him company. There was only so long that she could entertain herself and her boredom had at last gotten the better of her.

She padded down the corridor, clad in ripped jeans and a fitted black t-shirt, her hair tied back in a tiny ponytail.

Continuing her search, Yuuki neared the Chairman's office, wondering why the door was ajar. The Chairman was away with Kaname, tending to some business that was apparently too above her head for her to be privy to any details regarding it.

Cautiously, she put her palms against the door, gently pushing it open and peering inside. The sounds of clinking glass filtered into her ears, her curiosity growing by the second.

Stepping fully inside the Chairman's study, Yuuki soon discovered the whereabouts of her formerly missing companion.

There he was, kneeling in front of the Chairman's liquor cabinet, rummaging around with purpose.

Assuming stealth mode, the russet haired girl snuck over to him, his back to her as she neared him. Oblivious to her approach, Zero continued poking around, a smirk appearing upon Yuuki's face.

She pounced, her arms lacing around his neck as he nearly jumped from his skin.

"Caught ya'," she whispered in his ear, sending chills racing up his spine. Her lips brushed against his ear as she spoke, and he swore under his breath.

"What the hell are you doing?" he asked heatedly, cursing that he'd been caught in the act. He'd hoped to avoid her tonight, considering his plans.

"I could ask you the same. What are you doing?" she asked, peering over him to investigate.

Her eyes ran over the contents of the cabinet, taking in the numerous bottles of liquor sitting within.

"Wow. The Chairman's kind of a lush, huh?" she noted, having never known so much of the devil's juice was in his possession.

'Must be why he's always red-faced and happy,' she thought to herself.

"Don't you have something to do?" the silver haired youth wondered, the feeling of her small body pressing against his back almost more than he could bear.

"Nope. I thought I'd just bother you. Now, what's the plan?" she asked, noticing that his hand was planted on a rather large bottle of rum.

"Well, if you're trying to bother me, then…"

"Stop being such a grump, Zero. Besides, if you don't tell me, I'll just blackmail you," she said simply, a mischievous glint in her cinnamon eyes.

"You wouldn't," he nearly squeaked, recalling the time she'd caught him posing with is Bloody Rose in the mirror in his room.

"Oh, but I would, my dear. Now, what are we doing?" she asked, sliding herself up, her hands remaining upon his shoulders.

"Fine. Here, take this," he said, handing her the bottle. She took it, watching as he grabbed another smaller green bottle and closed the cabinet, locking it.

"How'd you find the key, anyway?" she asked, following him towards the door.

"He keeps it under the maneki neko on his desk," Zero answered, replacing the key in said hiding spot before making his way towards the door, the diminutive brunette following close behind him.

He poked his head out into the hallway, and, satisfied that they were alone, Zero led her to the kitchen.

She watched him rummage through the refrigerator, coming up with a bottle of cola and a carton of orange juice.

Shutting the door with his foot, Zero looked down at her. Yuuki was wearing her eager face, causing him to groan internally. This was totally not going to end in his favor.

"Get some glasses," he instructed, and she dug around in the cabinet, finding two tall ones.


At around 9 o'clock, Yuuki found herself in the Chairman's sitting room, perched upon the middle cushion of the couch, the liquor and mixers on the coffee table in front of them.

Zero took his place beside her, taking up the TV remote and clicking it on.

"Ok," he began, surfing from channel to channel until they landed upon a random movie.

"I'm going to mix some highballs," he told her, eyeballing a shot of rum and pouring it into one glass.

"A what?" she asked, confused and without a clue as to what the hell he was talking about.

"Nevermind. I'm going to mix some drinks," he answered, then pouring a bit of cola into the glass with the rum.

Turning to find the top, he continued.

"Now, I know you've never had anything alcoholic before, so…" he trailed off, eyebrow raising as she started guzzling the drink he'd just poured.

"Yuuki!" he protested, nearly causing her to choke.

"What?" she shot back, before continuing to drink. It was quite sweet to her taste buds, but came with a slightly burning kick as she swallowed. All in all, not too bad.

"Anyway, every time someone curses in this movie, we take a drink. And I'd slow down, if I were you," he told her, and she watched as he poured himself a drink, using more rum than he had for hers.

"And why do you get more?" she wondered with a slight pout, holding her glass out for more.

"Because, unlike you, I can handle my alcohol," he answered.


Her giggles echoed throughout the room, his own deeper laughter soon joining hers. It was just after midnight and the two teenagers lay on the couch, in a state the world knows as "trashed".

"Can you pour me another?" she asked, her head falling back to rest upon his chest.

"I think," he said, "that you've had quite enough."

"Fine, buzz kill. I'll get it mahself," she slurred, attempting to lean forward. Gravity pulled a TKO, however, the girl rolling into the floor with a loud 'thump'.

His velvety laughter soon followed, Zero leaning forward to inspect the damage.

She was laying there, a ridiculous smile plastered across her face, her eyes looking back at him, slightly hazy from her alcohol consumption.

"You're so wasted," he accused, his strong hands gripping her waist as he hauled her back up to the couch.

No sooner had he deposited her upon the cushion than she leaned towards him, her forehead smacking him in the face and nearly making him see little birdies.

Still, he laughed. He couldn't help it, his face flushed as the incident went from being funny to hysterical in his own mind.

"What're you laughing at?" she asked, then giggling like mad herself. Her own face was flushed, the heat of her cheeks like that of a sunburn.

He continued laughing, an idea popping into her head. She was up in a flash, her legs jello-esque as she assumed the position.

"Oh, god, Yuuki…don't do it!" he wailed, unsure of whether or not he'd be able to take what was coming.

And then, it happened. Yuuki started drunken hippie dancing in the middle of the room, her arms swimming out in front of her with absolutely no defined rhythm whatsoever.

Still, something about her movements enchanted him, nearly putting him in a trance despite the chuckles that escaped him.

"Only you could get away with that," he noted, watching her spin around, knowing she was making herself dizzy.

Before she fell onto her face, Yuuki went about invading his space, flopping herself down in front of him on his cushion and resting her legs on top of his.

"How was that?" she asked, sighing mightily as she leaned her head against him.

"Priceless," he answered, a smirk on his face.

"So, you were going to do this all alone?" she wondered, her hand reaching out to absently play with a lock of his silver hair.

"Wouldn't be the first time," he revealed, noticing the mischief dancing in her eyes.

"Ooo, Zeroooo…you're a bad boy, aren't ya'?" she teased, tucking his hair behind his ear. Her fingers strayed to his tattooed neck, tracing the bold black lines.

"Don't you like bad boys?" he asked, swallowing hard as he noticed their proximity to one another.

She thought for a moment, her eyes piercing into his very soul.

"I like this one," she answered, poking him in the chest as she spoke.

"Is that you or the liquor talking?" he wondered, feeling her body shift. Suddenly, she was straddling him, her forehead touching his.

"Believe me when I say it's all me," she answered, the sweet smell of rum on her breath.

Time seemed to stop, his fingers moving to tangle in her hair, having come loose from her wallowing around. Her lips were first to touch his, soft like the brush of the wings of a butterfly.

His head swimming, he returned her kiss with fervor, his arm wrapping around her waist and pulling her close against him.

He felt her small hands, cradling his face between them as her soft onslaught continued, hacking away at his usually unshakable self control.

All too soon, she broke away, her breath labored and her eyes clouded.

He smoothed one hand along her back, suddenly aware that something was very wrong.

"Zero…" she said, "I don't feel so hot."

"Shit," he muttered, getting quickly to his feet and taking her with him, half carrying and half dragging her to the Chairman's bathroom.

No sooner had he lifted the toilet seat and gathered her hair back that it hit, her small body heaving in his grip as she released the devil's tonic into the toilet.

Zero sighed, cursing himself for allowing her to participate in his night of drunkenness. He'd known full well that her tiny body couldn't handle as much as she'd ingested and now she was paying the price. He was sure she'd hate herself…and him, in the morning.

He rubbed her back until she fell silent, her coughing and choking finally subsiding. He cautiously leaned forward, grateful that her aim had been solid. Flushing the toilet with his foot, he led her to the sink, where she all but crawled into it and fell asleep.

"Yuuki," he said, finding one of her spare hair ties in the cabinet and pulling her hair back once again.

"I'm ok," she sighed, turning on the water and beginning to rinse out her mouth. He watched as she then brushed her teeth, helping to steady her all the while.

"That really sucked," she muttered, slumping against him as he allowed himself the luxury of holding her close.

"Here, let me get you to bed," he said, picking her up and making his way towards her room.


"Ughhh, I feel like ass," she complained, though she felt better now that she'd yakked. She lay there, curled up on her side, Zero sitting on the mattress beside her.

"Are you going to make it?" he asked, his eyes nearly bugging from his head as she began making snow angels in the middle of her bed.

"Yuuki, I'm never letting you drink again," he concluded, shaking his head as she began to sing. It was the most beautiful sound he'd ever heard, her voice smooth and mellow despite how drunk she'd become.

He watched her, her movements finally ceasing, her singing fading away as sleep began pulling at her.

"Zero…will you take my pants off?" she asked sleepily, causing him to swallow hard.

'Any time,' he wanted to assure her, though he somehow kept himself from it.

With more control than he realized he possessed, his hands unbuttoned her jeans, then sliding them down her long legs and tossing them to the floor.

He could swear a tick had formed in his right eye as he looked down upon her, clad now in only a snug fitting t-shirt and…god, were those black lace panties???

Deciding it was time for him to make good his escape, Zero leaned down, placing a chaste kiss upon her brow.

The gods would have none of it, Yuuki's fingers snagging his wrist before he could take a step towards the door.

"Don't go," she requested softly, pulling him back down towards her.

"Yuuki, I really don't think…"

"Why? Don't you want to?" she asked, causing him to sigh mightily. Of course he wanted to. He wanted to each and every night, but he didn't, because it was a very impractical idea.

However, the Chairman and that damn Kaname wouldn't be back for another couple of days, so technically, there would be no one to murder him for it should he give in and stay the night with her.

Mentally assaulting himself for even thinking of yielding to her request, Zero inwardly declared 'Screw it!" and began pulling his t-shirt over his head, tossing it on top of Yuuki's discarded jeans. He then slid carefully in next to her, feeling her arm immediately snake across his bare chest and pulling him closer.

"That was fun," she mumbled, her head coming to rest on his shoulder. He put one arm around her shoulders, pulling her blanket up over them with his other hand.

"You're such a mess," he said, a smile touching his lips.

"Can I be your mess?" she asked, sleep about to take her fully.

"You doofus. You've always been my mess," he told her, brushing his lips across her forehead.

"Good. I'm glad you see things my way," she told him, her hand sliding up to rest upon his neck. Leaning up, she kissed him, her lips soft as they touched his.

Realizing that he was in fact a very patient person, Zero reveled in the scent and taste of her, not surprised as her head fell again to his shoulder, soft sounds of sleep coming from her shortly thereafter.

Pulling her close, his eyes closed, his own head still swimming a bit from the many drinks he'd downed.

Sleep found him, his dreams full of nothing but the warm touches and soft kisses of Yuuki, the girl that owned his tattered heart and had tamed his tortured soul.


And that, as they say, is that. I thought about adding something more, but I think that's fluffy and whatever enough. Something carefree compared to my other somewhat intense tales (which I of course encourage you to check out!!!) Let me know what you think! :) Ja ne!

*Cosmic Moon Baby*