Disclaimer: I do not own Charmed, all belong to their proper owners, and all that lovely stuff.

A/N: So, welcome to the first Chapter of Goddess! I have been planning, still planning actually, and been coming up with some cool things to show you all, so please read! I am not doing a prologue to this series, but there will be a prolougish chapter later on in the story. I hope you enjoy the first chapter!

"Love and Loss Part 1"

I feel like my life is just beginning…


"Love. The world we know is full of it. Whether we find the right match is something else. Though love can be found in the touch of a lover, the smile in a nephew's face, or in the tease of a sister, they are all signs of love. But when it comes to our soul mate, or even Mr. Right, how do we know if what we find is true? Finding love is one of the hardest things someone can ever go through in their lives. It is one of the eternal tests that destiny plays on us. One of those common tests seem to be trials on the bonds of friendship…"

Phoebe Halliwell stopped typing on her silver laptop, placing it off her legs which were spread across the crème colored couch she had in her condo. Putting her laptop on the coffee table, she swung her legs over onto the floor without making a sound.

Her life couldn't have gotten any simpler. Since she had fought the Ultimate Battle almost a month ago, she had been able to move on with her life. Her column had seemed to make a comeback, becoming more popular than before. Phoebe had decided to move on to her next project. She wanted to help people find love. Ever since being with Coop, her life had become bliss. They had went out a few times, and connected immediately.

Phoebe spent the last month getting to know her apparent future husband, to see if they could even be compatible. And so far, if what the previews were showing were true, then she had no problem for the movie that was to be the rest of her life. Being in love with Love, was the best feeling Phoebe could ever hope for.

Writing the introduction of her book, which she was still unsure of her title for, had triggered something in her mind. Phoebe had grown apart from her sisters ever so slightly from moving out, and not having to deal with the Charmed duties, they could all live a normal life, spending family moments like they were supposed to, not fighting demons. In this month, she hadn't spoken to Billie since watching the death of her sister Christy. Piper felt strongly about Billie's exclusion from the Halliwell family, yet Phoebe felt differently.

Maybe it was the love and compassion she felt in her heart, but Phoebe and Paige felt the slightest compassion for the girl, Phoebe more than her sister. She felt the need to reach out to her now, in this moment of bliss, and happiness, Phoebe wanted to share it to the young witch who had lost her way.

Phoebe had resisted the urge to use magic since not needing to use it to save the world every week, but she needed to now, to save Billie from her inner torments. Phoebe couldn't explain the feeling she had, but she felt as if she could feel Billie's pain. Though Phoebe knew what it felt like when she had her power of empathy, this feeling wasn't it. Call it witch's intuition, but she felt as if she was suddenly pulled to the young witch, just as she was when she first met her.

Pushing herself off the couch, she pulled her dark green jacket tighter around her fit body, and was ready for whatever temperature she was going into. She was going to talk to Billie, no matter what.

Phoebe closed her eyes in concentration. She had always been a master at writing spells in her mind, and she filled herself up with the knowledge she had. Though she didn't know it, her muse had touched her head and Phoebe's eyes opened quickly, taking in a breath, she began her incantation:

"I call upon a witch's call,

To retrieve the sister fall,

Take me to the one, who seeks,

To be saved from the many weeps."

In swirling white lights, Phoebe's petite body disappeared and left her embellished condo empty.


The world seemed lost without them; the people she loved. Staring at the cold stones that laid on the wet ground in front of her, Billie Jenkins looked to the graves in front of her. To her left was a headstone that shared two names, Carl and Helen Jenkins. Her parents who had been killed by the Noxon demons, the people the Triad had sent to kill her parents.

That was what the whole conflict was, the stupid Triad. Billie wished she had been the one to through the potion and kill the son of a demon. Looking to her right was the one who had caused the whole in her heart, the one who had given her nightmares for the past month. Christy Jenkins. Once looking to the grave, she felt tears begin to cloud her vision. Blinking harshly, the tears rolled down her cheeks, as she began to weep once more.

She had killed her sister, her own flesh and blood. She didn't understand how it happened, and why it happened so fast. She had tried to go back in time; to just before she had killed Christy after returning to the present, but it wouldn't work. Magic had deserted her, and so had the friends she had betrayed. Not that she could blame them, she was blinded by what her sister had told her, and she took her side, as sisters do.

Holding her head to her hands, she wept, letting her hands try and bear the sorrow. Suddenly, she heard something shimmer above her. Looking up, her eyes red from the tears, white swirling lights appeared and in a sudden shimmer, she saw the young brunette who she knew as Phoebe.

Phoebe came close to Billie, steeping to her knees, and stroking Billie's head. "Oh honey," Phoebe started, holding Billie into an embrace, and allowing it, Billie hugged her back, with such force, and Phoebe widened her eyes from the squeeze.

"Phoebe, I am so sorry, I can't begin to tell you how sorry I am, I just, I wanted my sister back so much, and when I finally got her, she brainwashed me into thinking something that was totally not true. I can't believe I screwed up my life so much…" Billie cried, weeping into Phoebe's shoulder. Keeping her into the embrace, Phoebe closed her eyes in sadness.

The former Charmed One looked to Billie and sighed, holding her close. "Let's get out of here…" Phoebe said stroking the blonde's hair again. Billie showed no response, but continued to close her eyes in sadness, resting her head in Phoebe's shoulder.

No longer able to look at the graves any longer, Billie turned her head inward and whispered, "Take me away."

Closing her eyes in concentration once more, Phoebe thought, thinking of a spell to return them to her condo:

Return me to the place that saves,

To release this girl from pains.

In the same way Phoebe had appeared, Phoebe and Billie disappeared from the grassy ground, in shimmering white lights, and the two witches disappeared from the graveyard, where the graves of the Jenkins' family lay vacant once more.


Phoebe walked back into the joint living room/kitchen, with a steaming cup of chamomile tea. She walked and placed the tea on the coffee table. Billie curled herself on the couch, near the arm and laid her head against the back of the couch. Her face was pale and expressionless. She seemed to have left herself in a wreck for weeks.

Sitting on the couch, Billie looked to Phoebe and turned her head toward Phoebe for a moment, and saw the steam release from the cup. "Honey, you know what happened wasn't your fault. She was corrupted by evil, and there wasn't anything you could do, she was evil, and you only defended yourself." Phoebe explained.

"That isn't true; I could have saved her somehow! I was supposed to save her, how could I not be able to save my own sister!" Billie said, breaking down once more, placing a hand to her eyes.

Phoebe sighed and looked to Billie once more, pulling Billie again, looking to her with sympathetic eyes. "Billie, you have to stop this, you are not to blame for your sister's death. No matter how much you think you are, you aren't. You have done nothing but good. I had to vanquish the love of my life, which was one of the hardest things I had ever done." Phoebe said, reminiscing to the night she, Piper, and Paige had killed Cole, before he came back from the Wasteland.

"And when my sister died…" Phoebe said, looking to the floor and sighed. "I never told Piper, but I felt like it was my fault. I was in the Underworld during the time of exposure, and Piper's death. I was selfish, and was worrying about saving Cole. When I heard Piper had died, I tried to make amends and trade myself for her life. But for that cost, I still lost my sister." Phoebe said, noticing that she herself had started to tear.

"I blamed myself for Prue's death, for me not being there when she died, if I had not wanted to get Cole back so badly, I would have saved her. But in the same retrospect," Phoebe said, trying to gain back the moral she was trying to convey. "If I hadn't gone to see Cole, and make the sacrifice that Piper and I made, we would have never met Paige. The sister we never knew, which would have led to us never meeting you. It is all one big trickle effect." Phoebe said, swiping at her cheek to get the tear from her face.

Billie concentrated her face, listening to Phoebe's speech, and it made sense to her. That this was her destiny, that if Christy hadn't been raised by demons, her parents dying by the Triad, she would have never been in the place she was now, though it wasn't the pleasant thing to endure, it was her destiny. Something that should could grow upon, and hopefully open up to a new destiny.

"Thanks Phoebe," Billie said, hugging Phoebe into a tight embrace with one arm. "I just wish I could make amends to someone…" Billie said, looking to Phoebe with a sorrowful face. Before Phoebe could respond, a shower of blue orbs descended from her ceiling, and formed an image Billie thought she would never see again.

With a deep brown t-shirt, and dark jeans, J.D. Williams appeared to the two witches. Billie's mouth dropped as well as Phoebe's. "Oh my god. J.D.!" Billie cried, jumping from her seat, and running to him, the color in Billie's face returning instantly. Though she was not completely over Christy's death, she could handle some happiness, for now. "But how…" Phoebe said, confused, looking from the couch, to the man who she had seen about 7 or 8 months ago. "When I sacrificed my life for Paige's the Elders awarded me the chance to be a whitelighter, like I was destined to be." J.D. replied, hugging Billie, as she held him around the waist.

"So then why have you come to see me?" Billie asked, smiling brightly, "Not that I am complaining." She added.

"I came to see you, since I hadn't been able to say a proper goodbye." He said, with his goofy boyish smile. "Well, now you don't have to." Billie responded, keeping an arm around his waist. "You wanna talk?" J.D. asked, looking to the young blonde. She nodded and J.D. smiled. The two then shined brightly into blue orbs as they disappeared.

Phoebe smiled at the two kids as they disappeared. Phoebe got up from her seat once more, and grabbed a hair band from the table on the side of the couch, and pulled her hair into a ponytail, letting it hang loosely as she walked to the other table that was against the wall, near her bedroom door.

Looking to a small photo, she saw the picture that was taken by Leo two weeks before Prue died. Smiling, she pulled the picture up and stroked the outline of Prue's body, her bright smile gazing upward at her. With Piper in between the two sisters, all three looked happy with one another. Phoebe shaking her head at herself, because of her blonde hair she herself had at the time. She looked at the photo once more, and placed it back on the table.

Phoebe stuck her hands in her pocket, and strolled around her luxurious apartment. Taking in the emotions she had just laid on the table. Her past flooded back to her, and she sighed in how much had happened to her over the past eight years, let alone what had happened this past month. How much she had to go through; the battles, both physical and emotional, she needed to face to get to where she was today.

Without noticing, a pink sphere appeared from the ceiling and hovered above the witch's head. Looking upward, she jumped, "Ah crap…" Phoebe responded, and the ball suddenly shattered, swirling around the Charmed One, and she disappeared. The swirls gathered once more, and became the sphere it had first appeared as. Floating upward, the sphere disappeared, taking Phoebe with it.

End of Chapter

A/N: I hope you really liked the chapter, I will be uploading the next chapter soon, I have written up to Chapter 10 of this series, so I hope you all review if you liked it!