I don't own Twilight! Nor do I wish to own it!

Ways to Annoy the Voultri!

Roll in sparkles and run around in the sunlight.

Do that in their city and shout "Look! I'm sparkly!"

When they come to kill you, hide in the sunlight.

Give the heads crutches.

Show them the Twilight series. Tell them everyone's read them and say "Happy Hunting!"

Poke them until they fall apart.

Tell them to catch up with their sleep for at least the next thousand years.

Release a werewolf (a real werewolf) underground.

Do that in their city.

Tell them the Cullens are cooler.

Make people disappear randomly in their city and blame it on their guards. (namely Jane!)

Call them fake vampires.

Trick them into going into the sunlight during a festival in the city.

Trick them into drinking animal blood.

Call them names that relate to how old and brittle they are.

Bonus: Do all of it and run for your life! ^^

Ways to annoy Jacob Black

Make him read the Twilight series.

Tell him Edward is better than him.

Give him puppy chow in a doggy bowl.

Put team Edward posters in his room.

Make him wear a team Edward T-shirt.

Call him a dog, pup, mongrel, ect.

Put him in the same room with Rosalie and watch all hell break lose.

Steal all his clothes while he's away.

Put him in a room with Paul for two weeks with nothing but potato chips for company.

Give his clothes to fan girls.

Give fan girls his address.

Kidnap Renesmee.

Spread rumors that he's on steroids.

Get Leah to annoy him.

Tell him vampires are cooler that wearwolfs.

Tell Him that Bella hates him.

Write 'vampires rule' all over his Rabbit.

Write love letters to him and sign it as Rosalie.

Do that but sign it as Edward.

Do it again but sign it as Leah.

When he's about to kill them, blame Sam.

Tell him that Embry thinks he's hot. (And I don't mean in temperature.)

Pay Leah to kiss some boy and have her think about it while in wolf form.

Then blame Edward and Rosalie.

Blind fold him and Leah. Tell her she's kissing Sam and tell him he's kissing Bella. Then have them kiss.