DAMN IT, LEAH! WHAT HAPPENED?!? Jacob Shouted.
I COULDN'T HELP IT, OKAY?!? I screeched.
I think I might actually kill myself this time. He ruined me again, and worst of all he showed me where I went wrong. I had it all back and he took it, again. I was a werewolf and now I knew that I couldn't change that. What was I supposed to do? So I decided that I would kill myself, no matter who it hurt.
Leah no! Please wait for me to help you! I can, I know I can. Let me show you something before you do anything rash! Please Leah.
That was Embry. What did he want to show me? What could possibly change my mind? I'd give him that chance. I definitely owed him that after leaving him and treating him like trash that I'd just recycled. So I told him to meet me at the beach.
When I met him there, I was human. And dressed. Thankfully, so was he.
"What do want to show me, Em?" I said softly.
"I want to show you that there are people that have even worse lives than you, and still go through life everyday. You wanna know why they don't give in to the depression? Because they know what would happen to the people that love them. They know that without them, people would cry. You need to see that Lee." Embry said.
I nodded and he led me to his truck and we drove to a small blue house in Forks.
"Who lives here?" I asked curiously.
"Annabelle Brown. She has two children and her husband died of brain cancer 2 years ago, when Annabelle was pregnant. She just lost her job and is gonna lose her house if she can't pay the bills by the end of this month. To add to all of that, her 6 month old son was just diagnosed with autism and he'll never be speak."
"Oh my god, Embry. That's terrible." I said.
"She's just person number one." He said solemnly.
Then we drove farther into Forks, through the heavy rain. I watched as the trees descended past me. We finally arrived at a large brown house with red shutters.
"This is Oliver Cunnings. He lost all his money gambling and can't pay back his debts. He has gotten several death threats. He is probably going to die." Embry said.
"Who are these people, Embry? How do you know them?" I asked
But Embry wasn't listening. He kept driving and finally got to a familiar house. The house where Bella used to live, where Charlie now lived.
"23 years ago, Renee left with Bella sending Charlie into a depression. He gave up on everything and knew that it was over. But he went through it all because he had a duty in this town. He always hoped that Bella would come back to him forever but he knew she wouldn't. If he had given in and hurt himself, he wouldn't have been here to take Bella in."
I couldn't speak. How hard is it to live in this world? I never realized. But then we were driving again. A house with a teenage girl sitting out front. She had black hair and was wearing dark clothes. She didn't even look up as we stopped at her house. She looked like she didn't care.
"That little girl is Jade Livingberg. She's thirteen. Her father is a heavy drinker and her brother just ran away and got in a terrible accident and is in a coma. She cuts herself and lost all her friends. She's attempted suicide 3 times and each time, her father catches her." Embry said.
"Embry, how do you know these people?"
"I am friends with each of them. Even small towns have hurt. You need to know that your not alone Lee. I am here, and there are plenty of people who can relate."
"But—." I started but he took me into a kiss that I couldn't refuse.
So I let it be. I knew that I loved Embry. I also knew that I was probably better off staying alive. What good would it do?
"Now do you see? Now will you stop the depression?"
"Only for you." I told him.
drove to La Push and saw some fireworks setting off at the cliff. I
chuckled and looked at Embry. He really was perfect. He did
understand. there was the risk of him imprinting and I would lose.
But for the second time in my life, I thought of someone else. I knew
he would love me as long as he possibly could. I would let him and be
happy. I would have to endure the pain and let him love me.
"I will never leave you, even if I imprint." He promised.
"Don't promise anything, Embry. I promise to not hate you, when you imprint. When it happens I will understand that it is something you cannot control. I have moved on from Sam. I know that when you find someone you truly love, you have to make sacrifices and I will be the one to do that, if you don't mind. You won't have to leave her for me, I will leave you."
"When did you forgive Sam?"
"When I realized that what's meant to be is just that, meant to be. When what's meant to be isn't what you wanted, you're unhappy. I don't want to be unhappy. Love makes people stupid, Em."
"Seeing what's meant to be is just as stupid as seeing what isn't there. I went looking for love and I found you, that wasn't stupid." He retorted.
"Looking for something that will hurt you just puts pressure upon the choice to let yourself love again. I know that."
I kept my mouth shut after that because I knew that if I wanted to love him, I would stop talking about what happens when he does leave me. It did hurt, but when your used to the pain; it holds you together.
I remember when I first lost Sam. I wouldn't talk to anyone and I actually thought about how I could never love again. Every time that I thought of Sam made me stop breathing and gave me butterflies. It made me sick to think that I would have to endure it again, but I knew it would make Embry happy.
That was all that mattered. My happiness has never been anyone's priority. Not even my own.
Okay, so I tried to slow it down and make it longer. Hope you like it, REVIEW! Peez. I thought this week would be the most depressing one. For funsies. Okay. Love ya lots. Read and Review.