"Happy Dancing and CoupleDumb"
Yahoo!: Top Ten Tips on a First Date:
One: Be a Jonas Brother (what, the heck, may I ask, is up with three dudes with curly headed wigs?)
Two: Avoid being Chad Dylan Cooper (go Alice Cullen. Bite me)
Three: Avoid taking her to Outback Steak House. She'll start to dream about the Jonas Brothers' Australia, and then that will lead her to think about the film – which will give her dreams about the ruggedly sexy Hugh Jackman that will permanently distract her from thoughts of you. (Last I heard, Hugh was a werewolf or something of that sort. And for the love of a wig, shut up about the JB)
Four: Give her flowers when you pick her up.
Five: Take her to an expensive, formal restaurant.
Six: Do a little John Mayer. (Wonderland? Yeah, I'll do that…)
Seven: Don't kiss her. (What if you've already kissed her before the date?)
Eight: Though she may be beautiful, refrain from telling her that you love her. (So should I really consider this a first date?)
Nine: Wait at least twenty-four hours to call her after the date. (Screw Yahoo. Damn number ten.)
"Hey, Sonny," I didn't mean to go all Taylor Swift on her or anything (better a hot blonde than three dudes with wigs), but I showed up at her and Tawni's dressing room door with a bouquet of lilies and roses. She smiled up at me, as I, as inconspicuously as possible, gave her a once-over (I did this while she accepted the flowers, 'awwed' over the flowers, and ran to put the flowers on her dresser). She was stunningly beautiful in a little yellow spring dress (once again, with the Taylor Swift-ness), and her hair was half pulled back. She was beautiful. And she was officially my Sonny. I had my own little spot of sunshine all to myself.
The Jonas Brothers can suck it and buy their burnin' up land on Mars, I have a piece of the Son (with an O, not a U…), and I plan to stick with it.
"Thanks Chad," She grinned, bouncing up and down, as she threw her arms easily around my neck.
She couldn't see me, and I was glad. With one hand placed happily on the small of her back, I lifted the other one above our heads, clenched it in a fist, and pumped it over our heads in a moment of triumph.
My Sonny, folks. My little Son-beam.
"I love you." She spoke boldly, as she unraveled her arms from my neck and began walking in front of me, down the hall, and towards the exit.
She loves me.
Sonny. My little Son-beam loves me.
After I made sure that she was still walking, I stopped dead in my tracks. Then I threw both of my hands above my head, held one foot up in the air, and swung my hips (whilst swinging my hands above my head). I was happy dancing because I had my Son-beam, and it was flippin' wonderful.
It was not Outback. It was not Year of Wigs 3000 or Hugh Jackman's Hangout. It was a park, at sunset with just the two of us (where hopefully nothing could go wrong).
Sonny was glowing, and we were sharing happy jokes and talking about random things.
Such as the fact that her mother has seven toes on one foot, and Sonny had some sort of surgery to fix a gap between her teeth. (Of course, I told her that I would've loved her even if she still had the gap, to which she 'guffawed').
And then, all of a sudden Sonny scooted a little closer to me and rested her precious head on my shoulder.
Every muscle in my body tightened up.
And I really, really did not know where to go with this.
"Chad?" Sonny's voice came out in a whisper, and I still remained in place.
Should I put my arm around her? No, that would be too forward.
Should I kiss her again? No, it wasn't the right time.
So I just grinned tightly and hoped that she couldn't see how nervous I was.
"Chad," Sonny sighed, shifted her head to a more comfortable position (making me tense more), and continued on with her one-sided conversation, like most women are perfectionists at. "When did you fall in love with me?"
More tensing and a gulp. Of course this is the question that every man doesn't want to hear. Technically speaking, we should be the ones asking it. Such as, Chris Rice went so far as to write a song about it. It's called "When Did You Fall in Love with Me?" – Sung and written by a man with the sweet-liness of Curious George.
But now Sonny (my Sonny) was asking that question. The dreaded question. The question that I've never been asked before (probably because I've never been in love before, but whatever).
Still though, she needed an answer. I could feel her eyes on me, and her little chin resting naggingly on my shoulder.
Think, Chad, think.
You've been head over heels in love with Sonny for some time now. You realized how jealous you were when Mr. Dillweed came along (and realized that you needed to make a move).
On the first day that you met her, you were a tad scared of her. But then again, this is a girl who would probably love to believe in love at first sight, so you could lie…
But lies, especially in the start of a relationship are not good, are they? After all, Pinocchio's nose grew really, really long when he lied…And if your nose grows any more, it'll potentially ruin your career and Sonny will no longer be in love with you.
Therefore, you shouldn't lie.
You first knew you admired her when she beat you at musical chairs that one day. You first knew that you couldn't live without her the day that she caught you in a lie. So…
"Chad?" Sonny moved away from my shoulder, and I relaxed (but just for a millisecond). Her gaze was disappointed and irritated. Not such a good mix.
Say something, Chad. Just say anything.
"Yahhhh-whooooo!" It was like I had been possessed by a Jonas Brother and God decided that it would be a good time to pone (JBros style) me. As soon as my new, squeaky addition of the word came out, I cringed, closed my eyes, and turned away from Sonny.
Seriously. That second was lethal. That second, that answer, was vital. It had to be answered correctly. It had the potential to determine my future. Our future.
So a few seconds into dwelling in my embarrassment later, I heard a snort. And then another snort. And then Sonny broke out into a full-out contagious round of laughter.
In a moment of bravery, I turned to look at the beautiful girl. She was snorting through her laughs, and literally rolling on the ground laughing.
"Ch-Ch-Chad?" Finally my little Son-beam mustered up the strength to quiet down her giggles and face me. She was filled with joy…not wanting-to-break-up-with-me-ing-ness.
"Huh?" I managed to choke out.
"You don't have to answer that question, you know." She grew serious, and smiled sweetly, reaching for my hand. "I'm just happy that you love me now."
"Actually, Sonny, I've figured it out," I squeezed her hand slightly. "I really fell in love with you that day that you figured out what a jerk I was. I just realized it when you went out with Mr. Dillweed."
"Huh?" My Son-beam tilted her head to the side in confusion, and I went back over my words. Oops. "I meant Blondie's ex." I corrected, and Sonny chuckled.
"Well that took you a while," She said in a quiet voice, and then leaned over again, resting her head on my shoulder again. This time, it wasn't uncomfortable, and I wasn't tense. It was perfect in every way. "But I'm glad you realized it." Sonny went on. "And I'm glad that you told me…because I fell in love with you that same day."
At this, I gave her a suspicious look. "Really?"
She nodded, and I closed my eyes, wrapping my arms comfortably around her tiny body. Perfect fit.
I could've turned our date into a disaster, but my Son-beam made it all better. And we stayed at the park until the real sunset was over. It was beautiful, just like my Sonny. My Sonny who wasn't stupid, she was brilliant – but was too cute.
She chose to date somebody stupid though. So therefore, the two of us combined stand for 'stupid cute' – the perfect combination.
A/N: Hello, remember me?
Wow, it's been a while…
And I know, it was ridiculously cliché and stupid (not a pun, I promise) – but this is it. No more "Stupid Cute". I find that it's easier to write the angst (or ineptness, in Chad's case), before the relationship begins :D
However, thank you so much for every review! You guys are beyond amazing!