Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck.
This is my first Chuck fan fic. Be gentle...
Chuck vs complicated love
"I TOLD YOU TO STAY… IN… THE… CAR!!!"
"I know. But you were getting SHOT at! What was I supposed to do?"
"YOU SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN THE CAR!"
"Stop yelling at me! I'm not four years old!!!!"
"You sure act like a four year old!"
Casey was looking from Chuck to Sarah and back to Chuck again like he was watching a tennis match. *I can't believe they are at it again.* He thought to himself. He had had enough.
"Alright you two, stop it! We don't have time for your daily lover's quarrel right now. We have to get out of here and back to the Castle for debriefing." Casey said without taking a breath. Saying things fast was the only way to get his point through these days.
On the way back to the Orange Orange Sarah sat in the front passenger seat looking out the window. It had been a week since they had finished their mission in the suburbs and it had been the worst week since she got to know Chuck. He had seemed grumpy and of his game the first day. Sarah shrugged it off as stress after the mission. But when Chuck continued to be in a bad mood for several days, she was beginning to get worried. She had tried talking to him, but that just seemed to upset him more and for the past two days he had barely said one word to her.
Sarah too was beginning to get grumpy now. Not just because Chuck was but because the mission in the suburbs had ended in the worst possible way; with her rejecting him again. All he had wanted was just one more fun filled night at the house. Just the two of them. Having a great time, unwinding from the mission. She couldn't even give him that. She knew that the CIA would agree for her to have the house for one more night. But her mind had taken control over her heart and she had spilled out the usual phrases. He looked so sad. And come to think of it he had looked sad and depressed the whole week. She knew she had to make things right between them. Not just because Beckman would catch on to their bickering, but because she hated that he was sad and that she was to blame for it.
Chuck looked at Sarah's profile in the seat in front of him. There were so many words rushing through his brain when he looked at her like this. Gorgeous. That always popped up as one of the first words. Love. Joy. Laughter. Beautiful. Safe. Happiness. Kiss. But as of late other not so kind words had joined these words. Danger. Hate. Sadness. Hopelessness. Unbearable.
Chuck was sure that it had been beneath the surface for a while. But on their last mission it had all peaked and he found that he was not able to forgive and forget that easily anymore. She had so quickly turned him down when he asked for a final night in the house. He knew that she could have arranged it. But the clear cut answer he got showed him that she wasn't interested in spending any more time with him. What hurt the most was the fact that he thought they were at least friends.
He understood that there would never be anything else between them. It was just too hard to make it work. But he had at least thought that she would say yes to be spending a night together as friends. Just hanging out watching movies and eating good food.
Chuck knew exactly when his mood had started to shift. It wasn't when he was rejected by Sarah but when he told Ellie that Sarah and he would never be like her and Devon. When he had said that he was ok with them never moving forward. He had felt the anger rise within his chest and as he closed the door behind him he could hardly breathe. But after a few hours of thinking about it, he had come to the conclusion that this was Sarah's fault. He demanded that she gave him at least some response. Well, demanded was a strong word. Chuck knew he could never do that. But he also knew that this time it would take much more than the spy excuse to get Sarah out of the mess she had put herself in. Chuck was tired of always getting the same lecture.
As they parked outside the Orange Orange Chuck strolled past Sarah and in to the shop like nothing had happened. Like he didn't remember the huge fight they just had. Sarah felt annoyed by him, but once they were seated by the table and Beckman came online she willed herself to calm down.
The debriefing was over fairly quick. Sarah had wanted to mention Chuck's unwillingness to stay in the car, but seeing the angry look on his face she decided against it.
Casey stuck his phone in his pocket and looked at Sarah and Chuck. He knew leaving them alone to talk would probably be best.
"Well, I have to get back to my shift at the Buy More. Still got two hours left. Don't kill each other." He said as he walked up the stairs. Chuck smirked at Casey as he left the Castle and crossed his arms over his chest.
Sarah was about to say something when Chuck's phone suddenly started playing a song. He looked at the display and saw his sister's face.
"Hi Ellie." He said as he answered the call. "No I'm at the Orange Orange. It's my lunch break." He lied. "Now? Ok, we'll be here." Sarah heard him say before he ended the call. He looked up at Sarah before he started walking towards the stairs.
"We better get up there. Ellie is on her way over from the Buy More." Sarah followed him upstairs. It was time to put on the cover smile again and play loving girlfriend. Sarah hated the tone of Chuck's voice. There was no joy there anymore. Only anger and sadness. But as they walked through the door of the freezer Chuck held the door for her. *Always the gentleman.* Sarah thought to herself. As she walked past him her arm brushed up against his and she shivered involuntarily and she could have sworn she felt him shiver too.
They sat down by one of the tables to wait for Ellie. When Sarah saw Chuck's sister coming over the parking lot, she suddenly took Chuck's hand in hers and let her thumb travel up and down the back of his hand. She smiled at him and was surprised when he smiled back. He looked down at their hands and just as they heard Ellie coming through the door he grabbed Sarah's hand and kissed the back of it. Sarah was shocked but smiled. And as she heard Ellie great them she understood that Chuck just did it for cover.
Sarah looked up at Ellie as she found a chair and sat at the table too.
"Hi Ellie, how are you?" Sarah asked as she leaned in to give Ellie a hug. "Oh, I'm great! I've got the day off and decided to go shopping." Both Sarah and Chuck smiled and nodded. They all fell silent for a while before Ellie spoke again.
"Chuck, why did you say you were on a lunch break? You had your lunch ages ago. Morgan said you were on a service call. He was actually wondering where you got to." Ellie had a stern look on her face. Chuck looked down at his watch and realized that he only had two hours left of his shift.
"I… uhmm…" Chuck stammered. How was he going to get out of this one? Suddenly Sarah spoke.
"Ellie, it's all my fault. I saw Chuck coming back from the service call and asked him to come over and help me with some boxes. Well… one thing led to another… We forgot the time." Sarah explained, and to Chuck's surprise she was actually blushing. He looked at her with shock evident in his eyes. She could have just left it at the whole boxes thing. He suddenly felt Ellie's eyes on him and when he looked at her he smiled and blushed too.
Ellie was a little lost for words and had to clear her throat before she looked at both of them again.
"Oh well, I… Those things tend to keep one's minds of the time." She said smiling at Sarah. Sarah in return blushed again and looked down at her hand. Chuck was still holding on to it and neither wanted to let go.
Ellie could feel the tension building up and decided to break through the silence once again.
"Well, I just came by to invite you both to dinner and movie tonight. I'm cooking and Devon has agreed that Sarah and I should pick the movie. Can you make it?" Ellie smiled at Sarah. She looked at Chuck who smiled back nodding.
"That would be great. A nice relaxing evening sounds great." Sarah grinned.
"Great!" Chuck said squeezing Sarah's hand.
"Do you want a yogurt, Ellie?" Sarah asked.
"Yes. That would be nice. With raspberries and gummy bears please." Ellie smiled back.
As Sarah got up and walked towards the counter, Chuck got up too.
"I better get back to work before Morgan calls the police." Chuck sighed and hugged his sister goodbye.
"I'll see you later, sis."
He was about to take a step towards the door when he changed his mind and walked towards Sarah instead.
"And I'll see you straight after work." He said with seduction in his voice as he took Sarah's hand and brought her closer to him. Then he captured her lips with his in a deep half passionate kiss. Sarah was surprised about the sudden move and did not respond at first. But as she felt the tingly feeling on her lips her arms found their way around Chuck's neck. She felt herself pulling him closer and was thrilled when he let her do it.
Suddenly they were brought back to reality when Ellie shifted towards one of the tables. Chuck pulled back and looked down at Sarah. She gave him a look that he couldn't quite read. But he saw the smile tugging at the side of her mouth.
"I'll see you after work then." She said running one of her fingers down the length of his arm.
Chuck nodded and headed out the door. Sarah sat down by the table handing Ellie her yogurt.
"Sarah, I know this is none of my business but can I ask you a question?" Ellie asked after tasting the yogurt. Sarah simply nodded and smiled at her.
"From what I understand things haven't been that great between you and my brother lately. Although you seem to have figured out things now, I just don't understand why it's always so up and down with the two of you." Ellie put a gummy bear in her mouth.
Sarah sighed and started fiddling with her hair.
"I… We just…" Lying to Ellie had started to become a problem for Sarah. She was so innocent and she and Chuck were so alike. They both trusted people and thought the best of them. Not telling the truth was difficult, but changing the truth was easier.
"I care a lot for your brother, Ellie and he cares for me. But I have never been very good at showing my feelings. In that area Chuck and I are very different. Lately I think that Chuck is starting to feel that this relationship is headed nowhere and it is hard for me to convince him otherwise. I'm really not sure what to do." Sarah said realizing that she really didn't know how to make things better between Chuck and her.
Ellie smiled at her and finished off her yogurt.
"Why don't you just tell him how you feel? Tell him that you love him and that way you will prove him wrong."
*Love him? Tell him that? No, I can't do that. I have feelings for him yes, but to admit that outside of the cover? That is not a good idea.* Sarah thought to herself. *How do I explain this to Ellie.*
"I think with all the ups and downs we've had the past months, Chuck will not believe me if I just flat out told him how I feel." Sarah looked out the window and realized that what she said was absolutely true. If she and Chuck, once in the distant future, could even hope to be together she knew that he would have to be thoroughly convinced of how she really felt about him.
"Then you just have to show him how you feel. If he is so convinced that there is no future for the two of you, you have to show him that he is wrong." Ellie spoke and Sarah looked wide eyed at her for a moment before she felt herself nod in agreement.
"Ok then. I can't wait till you start showing him. But now I have to finish my shopping so that I can get home and prepare dinner. I'll see you later, Sarah!" Ellie hugged her and left the Orange Orange. Sarah was left alone and could not believe the mess she had gotten herself in to.