A/N As promised...a second chapter! And some C/B goodness too. I'm ignoring pretty much all of 2x20 completely, simply cause thinking about it makes me cringe. I could go on and on about how much I hated it, and how badly I think the writers have fucked up Chuck and Blair...but I won't. All (haha) I'm going to say is..at this point, the two of them possibly ending up together before the season ends is totally fucking surreal imo (no spoilers ppl, please. I hate spoilers and I don'..what'.happen) I still believe that C/B are endgame tho, I just hate what the writers are doing to them...and us!
Anyways, on with the chapter, which is loooong :) and dedicated to the reviewers on the first one. thanks for your lovely reviews! :)
Still un-beta'd, my apologies in advance.
Serena and Eric exchanged a secretive look when Chuck walked into the kitchen, and their whispered conversation came to an abrupt end.
"You really need to work on the whole 'subtle' thing." Chuck huffed, rolling his eyes, as he walked over to the refrigerator and pulled out the orange juice.
"I have no idea what you're talking about." Eric replied with feigned innocence. "Maybe your concussion is worse than the doctor said?"
"Charles, there you are." Lily entered the kitchen and immediately walked up to Chuck. "Serena called me earlier. How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine." Chuck told her. A little uncomfortable with the motherly concern, but not as much as he would have thought he'd be.
"Maybe we should have that bathroom re-tiled…" Lily mused, and poured herself some coffee. "Have it made less slippery."
Chuck opened his mouth to ask Lily what she was talking about, when he caught the frantic look he was getting from Serena behind Lily's back.
"Uhm…yeah, right. The bathroom tiles." Chuck repeated. "Since I…hit my head when I…slipped in the bathroom?"
Serena breathed an inaudible sigh of relief, when Chuck caught on to her white lie. She hadn't deemed it necessary to share the whole story with her mother.
"Yes, of course." Lily replied. "Besides, I've been thinking about doing some redecorating."
"Yourself?" Eric asked as he put some crème cheese on his bagel.
"Don't be ridiculous, you know what I mean." Lily replied, taking another sip of coffee.
"Thank God." Eric sighed with a mischievous glint in his eyes. "I was afraid you might get into the decorating business full time…or maybe become a real estate agent."
Eric's comment had Serena choking on her juice, and Chuck nearly failed to hide a smirk.
Lily looked at the three siblings with a confused look on her face. "What's so funny? Why would I get into realty?"
"Nothing mom. Eric's just being stupid." Serena laughed, pulling her bagel out of the toaster. "We should get going or we're going to be late for school."
Chuck was deep in thought, as the three of them made their way down to the limo. He didn't particularly enjoy the idea of going to school. The risk of running into someone in the hallways wasn't the most encouraging thought.
Well inside the backseat of the limo, Eric leaned forward to get a better look of Chuck's face. There was a bruise stretching from the corner of his eye and disappearing underneath the white gauze. Serena did the same thing, and Chuck scowled in discontent.
"You're lucky you didn't break the fall with your nose or something." Serena pointed out to Chuck, and leaned back against the seat.
"Lucky is not the word I'd choose." Chuck snapped. Not happy about the look of his face, but still feeling like it somehow matched his insides. Bruised.
"Serena's right thought…" Eric smirked. "…I know you have a thing for purple, but I'm not sure 'the Joker' is a look you should be aiming for."
At this point Serena burst out laughing, and her hysteria only increased when Chuck sent Eric a death glare.
Once she settled down, Serena looked over to Eric and they shared another look. Chuck didn't let it pass unmentioned, this time around either.
"Would you two stop with the non-subtle looks, already?" Chuck snapped, brushing his fingers through his hair and wincing as his fingers came in contact with the cut underneath the gauze.
"Sorry." Eric apologized airily.
"Yeah, sorry." Serena mimicked, and then went back to being serious again. "You know you're going to have to tell us about last night sometime soon, right?"
"There is nothing to tell." Chuck lied through gritted teeth. "I thought I made that clear yesterday."
"Well you might have been a little too…subtle about it."
"Then I'm telling you now to back the hell off." Chuck snapped and quickly got out of the limo as the vehicle came to a stop outside Constance & St Jude's.
Serena and Eric were quick to follow after him. Chuck was halfway up the steps when they caught up with him.
"Chuck…" Serena began, and put her hand on Chuck's arm to stop him in his tracks.
"Let go of me!" Chuck demanded, shrugging away from her touch and catching the attention of several of the students standing nearby.
"Just…don't." He continued in a lower voice. "It's over. It's too late."
"You don't know that unless you talk to her." Serena offered, and Eric nodded in agreement.
"She wants her knight in shining armour to come and rescue her." Chuck snapped, and a hint of hurt flickered by in his eyes. "And I'm clearly not him."
The two blondes were about to object, when Chuck tensed up visibly. His eyes seemed to be focused on something behind them.
"Speaking of knights…" Chuck managed to choke out between gritted teeth.
"Now if you excuse me." He continued, as both Serena and Eric turned their heads to see what he was talking about, and swiftly made his way up the steps – heading towards the entrance of the school.
For a moment Serena thought that she was mistaken, as her eyes landed on her best friend.
Her best friend that stood gazing up at Nate adoringly.
"Whoa." Eric breathed. More than a little confused. "When did that happen?"
"I'm guessing - last night." Serena replied, the whole picture suddenly clear in her mind, and her heart aching for Chuck.
"Right." Eric let out, as he too realized the reason behind Chuck's behaviour the night before, and that morning. "I'll go talk to him...or something." He told Serena, and then hurried up the steps to try and catch up with Chuck.
Serena watched as Blair smiled and kissed Nate's cheek before letting go of his hand. Blair then made her way up the steps, as Nate walked over to some of his friends from the lacrosse team.
Serena immediately marched up to her best friend.
"Blair!" Serena hissed, grabbing a hold of her friends arm and pulling her to the side of the courtyard. Ignoring some of the looks her actions received from the other students.
"Careful with the Prada, S!" Blair admonished airily.
"What are you doing with Nate?"
"Nate?" Blair repeated, and pretended not to understand what Serena was referring to. "We're getting…reacquainted. He's really changed, S."
"What about Chuck?" Serena jeered, seeing through her best friend's easily.
"What about Chuck?!" Blair fired back, her dark eyes shot daggers at Serena.
Normally such a look from Blair would have Serena dropping the subject, but not this time.
"I can't believe you…" Serena pointed out in a sad tone. "Come on B, Nate? Are you really going to settle for someone you don't love?"
"I love Nate!" Blair objected defensively, and at the same time tried her best to convince herself of the same thing. Then she lost a little of her ammunition as she continued. "…and settling hurts less than failing."
"He came to see you last night. Chuck that is." Serena informed her. Clearly sugar coating things would not be the way to get through to Blair.
"He what?" Blair was surprised, loosing her composure for a second before returning to her feigned indifference.
"He was really upset when he came home, B." Serena continued, inwardly apologizing to Chuck for selling him out like that.
"Well he isn't the only one who's been…upset." Blair hissed. Deciding that anger was easier than the truth. "So now he decides to show up, well that's too bad! I was there for him the whole time after the funeral, and put up with all of his shit! Where the hell was he when I needed him, huh? Gone, screwing one of his whores, drinking, being 'Chuck Bass'. And I was a fool for actually expecting more of him…"
"Blair!" Serena finally snapped. "Are you even listening to yourself? His dad died!"
"And my life just fell apart!" Blair bit back, no longer bothered to keep up the pretence of being unmoved and indifferent.
"I know you've been going through a hard time" Serena repeated patiently, then began to talk faster as she continued; "And I know you tried to help Chuck and be there for him, but he wasn't ready for that then…"
Blair scoffed and Serena furrowed her brows.
"And now he's been trying to be there for you!" Serena exclaimed, frustrated with her best friend. "But you won't let him! Yes, he hurt you and screwed up. Now you're hurting, and you turned to Carter, B. Carter! And now Nate?! Don't you see that you're doing the exact same thing as he did? The only difference is that you chose someone you both know! Don't tell me that he hasn't been there! He was there when I wasn't, when Nate wasn't! He wants to be there for you now too…"
Blair had been quiet the entire time during Serena's rant. She could feel the reasons that were so clear and reasonable in her mind mere minutes ago, fade away. Serena's final words were what erased them completely.
"…isn't it time that you let him?"
Chuck was walking through the hallway of St Jude's, ignoring Eric's attempts to strike a conversation with him. The only thing on his mind was the image of Blair…with him.
He walked up to his locker, still ignoring Eric rambling behind him.
"You can stop harassing me." Chuck scowled, looking at Eric for the first time in minutes. "I'm not going to throw myself in front of a bus."
Eric had to stifle a grin at the last statement, but quickly went back to being worried.
"You okay though?" Eric asked, and then realized that that was probably an incredibly stupid question.
Chuck merely narrowed his eyes in response. A silent warning for Eric to drop the subject.
"Uhm...well, okay." Eric stuttered, shifting his weight nervously. "I'll see you later."
Chuck turned his back to Eric and was staring blankly into his locker as the younger boy walked away. Relieved at first but then;
"Hey, Bobby?" Chuck called out after Eric.
"Yeah." Eric turned around with a relieved smile on his face.
"Nothing. Just…see you later."
Chuck slammed his locker shut. As he turned around he found himself face to face with Blair. His insides made summersaults, and he had to swallow hard to try and rid himself of the lump suddenly forming in his throat.
"Oh my God!" Blair stuttered when she caught sight of the state of Chuck's forehead.
"Way to compliment a guy, Waldorf." Chuck scoffed, doing his best to ignore the dryness in his throat and the ache in his chest. "Where's your Prince Charming?"
Blair frowned at his opening line, and then returned his glare.
"He'll come and save me from the villain any second now, I'm sure." She drawled, but was shocked when her remark didn't have the effect she planned.
Chuck's shoulders slumped, and the scornful look in his eyes evaporated.
"I'll spare him the effort." Chuck said, and then began walking away. Not able to stand there and trade insults any longer.
"Chuck…" Blair called out for him, both hesitant and confused.
"What, Waldorf?" Chuck turned around, and the devastation Blair caught in his eyes before he put his defences back up, startled her. "You told me you were done, and you've definitely proved your point. You've always wanted your white knight. And I'm not him. It doesn't matter that I…" Chuck trailed off, and diverted his gaze from her face to the floor.
"What…" Blair breathed. A part of her sensing what it was that he'd been about to say.
"It doesn't matter. Enjoy your fairytale, you deserve nothing less." Chuck told her in a soft voice, and then walked away.
"Aiming for that nose break?" Eric smirked at Chuck, leaning against the doorpost.
"Fuck off." Chuck grumbled, and took another swig from his tumbler.
Eric rolled his eyes at Chuck's ineloquent reply, and strolled over to sit down behind the desk.
"That wasn't exactly an invitation to stay." Chuck informed him dryly, from where he was lounging on the bed.
Eric ignored him, and leaned back in the chair.
"How about some Xbox? I found my Warhawk game yesterday." Eric asked, holding out the game for Chuck to see.
"Oh whoopee, videogames" Chuck replied mockingly, taking another mouthful of his drink.
"You really are the brooding type, aren't you?" Eric
"I'm not brooding!"
"Sure you're not." Eric agreed jokingly. "Now come on, let's play."
"I'm busy." Chuck scowled, and motioned the glass in his hand.
"Oh I don't mind if you get completely wasted." Eric teased as he got up from his position in the chair and walked over to the television. "That way you won't feel too bad when you see how much better I am at flying the Nemesis."
"Please." Chuck huffed, and rolled his eyes.
Eric sensed an upcoming victory. "Care to prove me wrong?" Eric smiled, and simply threw one of the game controllers at Chuck, who had to move quickly to avoid being hit in the face.
A knock on the door joined the sounds coming from the game. Chuck and Eric both called out to the guest, not taking their eyes from the screen.
When Chuck glanced over to the door – expecting Serena or Lily – he was taken aback at the sight of Blair standing there with a cautious expression on her face.
Eric sensed the sudden tension in the air, and as he too diverted his attention from the screen he had to suppress a pleased grin at the sight of Blair.
"I have to…" Eric put the game on pause and got to his feet, "…go look for something in the kitchen…"
With that excuse Eric quickly left the room and shut the door behind him. Chuck and Blair both looked at each other in silence.
"Hi." Blair managed to choke out, lingering hesitantly by the door. Not having planned much longer than up to this point.
"Hi." Chuck replied in a hoarse voice. Unsure of what to say or how to react. She's done, he reminded himself. She's moved on
"I…" Blair began but then hesitated. "I ended things with Nate…though I'm not sure there ever was a 'thing'."
"My condolences." Chuck sneered. "You must be devastated."
"No." Blair confessed. "…not about that, at least."
An awkward silence settled in the room. Chuck fidgeted with the came controller, and Blair remained standing by the door.
"Why are you here, Blair?" Chuck was the one to break the silence.
Blair looked startled at first, then slowly walked over and sat down next to him on the bed.
They sat there in silence for a while, neither of them saying anything.
"I guess I'm here because I'm not done." Blair finally replied in a whisper. "A part of me wants to be…needs to be…but I'm not."
Chuck looked over to her with a frown on his face, and opened his mouth to say something back.
"Don't say anything yet. "Blair begged. "I need to say this. You hurt me, Chuck. You really hurt me."
"I know I did, I…" Chuck began but stopped when Blair continued.
"…but still when something happens – good or bad – you're the one I want to call and tell all about it. I can't not care about you, no matter how much I try. No matter what I do, I keep coming back…"
Chuck listened all through Blair's rant, not sure whether to jump and dance with joy (not that he would…he's Chuck Bass.) or feel bed about it all.
When Blair trailed off, he diverted his gaze from the floor and looked at her. Blair's eyes were filled with tears, and she bit her lip to keep it from trembling.
"You." Blair whispered. "I keep coming back to you."
"And I keep hurting you." Chuck stated, and got to his feet.
"You do." Blair agreed, and when their eyes met Chuck could see just how much he had.
Like that day in the elevator he could see exactly how badly he'd hurt her. It broke his heart to know how true the statement was.
"Then why are you here?" Chuck blurted out, throwing his arm out in frustration.
"Because you're also the only one who can make it all better. Make me feel better." Blair replied. - a single tear making its way down her cheek - and got to her feet as well. "And I'm not done."
Chuck forced himself to breathe slowly in and out, and when he lifted his gaze to look at her, he couldn't help to feel a sliver of hope.
"My life is such a mess, Chuck." Blair breathed, then her face scrunched up and she began to sob openly.
Not sure what to do, Chuck took a step towards her and that was all she needed. Blair threw herself into his arms and cried, clinging to him.
Blair cried for what seemed like hours. Chuck didn't say anything - didn't offer her any empty promises, telling her that everything would be okay – he only hugged her tight, and breathed in her scent.
When she was breathing calmly again, Chuck began to loosen his grip of her shivering frame.
"Don't…" Blair whispered, and took a step closer again, burying her face in the crock of his neck. Even though she still felt miserable; wrapped in Chuck's arms she felt safer than she had in weeks.
Chuck's mind was reeling. Both from being so close to her, and at the same time fearing that she was going to realize her mistake any second. That they would go back to insults and avoiding each other.
"I can't be him." Chuck pointed out resignedly, and Blair looked up at him in confusion. Her eyes rimmed with red from crying.
"I can't be Nathaniel, Blair. I can't be your knight in shining armour, no matter how hard I try."
Chuck let go of Blair abruptly, the confession too painful, and retreated to the other end of the room.
"I don't want you to!" Blair objected fierily.
Chuck gave her a look that begged to differ.
"I don't want you to." Blair repeated, and walked over to him.
Chuck ran his fingers through his hair, and swallowed hard before he looked back at her. Bracing himself for something he couldn't quite put into words.
"I just want you." Blair declared, and placed herself so that they were standing face to face, before she reached out and put her hand on his cheek.
Chuck could feel the words burning on his tongue, and knew what he had to do. What he had to say. Still there was a small part of him that wasn't sure. A part that feared that she would realize he didn't deserve her.
"Do you want me?" Blair asked him. His silence frightened her, and she was scared that he might be done with her. That she had put herself out there again, only to be turned down one more time.
Chuck let out a breath he hadn't been aware of holding, and leaned down to rest his forehead against hers. Took her hand that was resting on his cheek and held it in his.
"Always." He ensured her, and he felt his heart beat furiously in his chest. "But…"
"No but." Blair told him. Hopeful and relieved. "Have you ever seen Pretty Woman?"
"What?" Chuck pulled back to look at her. Surprised by the turn the conversation was taking, then smirked. "Please."
Blair smiled at the unspoken 'I'm Chuck Bass' that was embedded in his words.
"Well Serena made me watch it," She began to explain. "…and in the movie, Julia Roberts tells Richard Gere that she has always dreamt of the fairytale with the knight and the white horse. Then later on they get into this fight and sort of break up…even though they weren't really together together. But then he comes to her house in his limo - instead of horse - and climbs the fire escape."
"You'd prefer us to have this conversation on the fire escape?" Chuck interjected teasingly, a mixture of relief, confusion and…happiness, flowing through his veins.
"No. " Blair rolled her eyes and went on with the story; "They make up and then he asks her what happens once the knight climbs the tower and rescues the princess…"
"What was her answer?" Chuck asked her, and Blair cocked an eyebrow at his sudden interest.
"She answers that 'she rescues him right back'." Blair finished, and crooked her head to the side as she awaited Chuck's reaction.
Chuck smirked, and combed his fingers through her curls.
"I like that." He admitted softly.
"I don't need some childish fairytale." Blair said. More sure about it than ever before. "I need you. I want you. Not Nate, not anyone else…just you."
"You have me." Chuck said sincerely, and Blair smiled as she leaned in to kiss him.
"No, wait." Chuck pulled back, knowing there was something left to be said.
Serena's words echoing in the back of his mind.
"Really, Bass?" Blair teased, an eyebrow raised in question. "You sure you know what you're doing?"
Chuck grinned at her, all of a sudden convinced that yes, actually, he knew exactly what he was doing.
"I love you." Chuck said, amazed by how right it felt to tell her those three words. "And I'm sorry it's taken me so long to say it, I should have said it back when you told me…You deserve to hear it every day, and I'm so sorry about…everything. I don't want to hurt you ever again, I won't hurt you Blair! And I promise I'll…"
"Bass!" Blair interrupted, and successfully cut off his rant by pressing her lips against Chuck's.
"I've missed that." Blair smiled as they pulled back, and Chuck broke out in a wide grin too.
"I've missed you." He smiled, and leaned in for another kiss. Dead set on making up for lost time.
"Chuck are you in here? I talked to…" Serena called out as she entered Chuck's room. When her eyes landed on the couple occupying the bed, she shrieked and quickly covered her eyes. "Oh my God! I'm so sorry!"
"Jeez, S, relax." Blair teased her best friend that was standing in the doorway with her hand covering her eyes. "We're all fully clothed in here."
"At least for now." Chuck added and earned himself a swat on the shoulder.
Serena removed her hand from her eyes.
"Ah! You guys made up!" She exclaimed happily, beaming at the two of them on the bed.
"Made up…made out." Chuck mused, and Blair only smiled at his remark this time. "Now, Marcia, if you don't mind. You're kind of interrupting something here…"
"Right, sorry." Serena smiled, and then turned her attention towards Blair. "You're giving me all the details later."
Blair rolled her eyes in response, and once Serena had exited the room and shut the door behind her, Blair turned to Chuck. "Marcia?"
"Family joke." Chuck smirked, and kissed her softly on the lips. "I had to make something out of their Brady Bunch tendencies."
Blair smiled. Adoring the part where he referred to the van der Woodsens as his family. Knowing what a big deal that was to him.
"Then you would be…?" Blair questioned, her fingers trailing the outlines of the bruise on his face.
"Greg, I guess." Chuck replied, his tone of voice let her know exactly what he thought of the comparison.
"Please, he has got nothing on you." Blair scoffed disapprovingly.
"My words exactly." Chuck smirked, and moved them around so that Blair was almost on top of him. "You're perfect, you know that?! I love you."
"You're Chuck Bass…" She joked, playing with his words. "…I love you too."
Alright...I might have overdosed a little on the fluff at the end. but what the hell...I needed to, alright? ;)
Please let me know what you think of it!
Thanks for reading!