Firefox: Serenity Now

A Naruto Tale

Nineteen year old Uzumaki Naruto opened his eyes, wondering just what in the hell had happened. He could vaguely make out that he was in a lighted room, but couldn't tell where he was, he could hardly see at all. His eyes felt like they were crusted shut, and his throat felt like a desert. He tried to lift his arm, but couldn't—he was so weak that even the attempt tired him so much he was afraid to try again. He sensed people around him, and he knew they were doing something to him. He could almost feel them touching his skin, doing things to his unresponsive body. It was like his entire body was experiencing the numbness of a leg that had fallen asleep. Then he thought no more for a long while, as oblivion once again took him.

Naruto woke again, feeling… He couldn't say he was feeling better, as before he had hardly felt anything at all, and now he felt pain almost everywhere. The cold pain of a limb left unprotected too long in freezing weather. He could feel though, and that was something. He could hear, too, and he was sure he would have been able to see if it wasn't for the blindfold obscuring his face. Having had his sight obscured before, he recognized the sensation. He felt not-so soft sheets below him, and smelt the antiseptic odor synonymous with hospitals. He heard almost nothing, save for the quiet hum of small electronics doing their job well. He tried to move, and managed to wiggle a bit, quickly finding that he was restrained. Naruto couldn't imagine why Konoha would tie down one of their own ninjas, so he imagined he was in an enemy village. He vaguely remembered being on a mission before whatever terrible event has caused him so much damage, but his memories were cloudy, and he couldn't quite focus. He relaxed. He was still so tired. It would all make sense in time.

A voice spoke, questioning, in some strange foreign tongue he couldn't begin to make sense of. The light warmth of skin briefly touching skin was felt on his hand, and then disappeared. He groaned, his raw throat protesting the action. His eyelids rose, and his was assaulted with visual input for the first time since this ordeal had first begun. Naruto couldn't move his head, but his eyes drank in as much of the room he found himself in as possible, his acute peripheral vision providing him with extra details. The room was sparse, white, and totally immaculate, the kind of room his surrogate-grandmother Tsunade demanded from Konoha's hospital. And yet, he knew in the first two seconds that he wasn't in Konoha. He wondered if he was in the elemental nations at all. Light radiated from the ceilings, lights like he had never seen before. The incandescent light bulb had only been discovered a few decades before Naruto was born, and no one, to his knowledge, had come up with anything better so far. These lights seemed to be built into the ceiling, and radiated a cool white light. The walls had computers built into them, he only recognized them from his time in the Star country. The few computers present in the elemental nations had been painstakingly reconstructed from pieces of ancient relics found in sites occupied by the great ancestors before the days of fire and plague. These machines were sparklingly new, and functioned perfectly, not like anything else he had ever seen. And the woman standing next to him, speaking to him in that odd language… She was the strangest of all. She was short, only about a meter and half tall, he guessed, and was dressed in some sort of protective garment which included a helmet. He looked down, it was her hand that had touched his before, but she was wearing some kind of glove that mimicked the feeling of flesh. He wondered briefly why a medic would be dressed like that. Was he contaminated with some sort of poison? His mind raced for a moment longer, before he simply decided to accept his current predicament at face value and wait to see what happened next.

The woman finally noticed that he was awake, and a radiant smile spread across her face. She exclaimed something in that odd language of hers, and pressed a small button embedded into the wall next to his bed. A mail voice erupted from the wall, and the woman answered it. The language barrier was going to get annoying fast, realized Naruto. The woman finished her conversation with the wall, and turned again to face the young ninja. She spoke to him softly, and gestured for him to respond. Naruto tried to speak, but his throat was too dry. He erupted into a wracking cough. The woman produced a small cup of water, and proceeded to help him drink it. The tepid, sterile liquid was the best thing Naruto had ever drunk.

Naruto tried again to speak, "H-hi.," he said, "Where am I?" He winced. God, he sounded weak. The woman cocked her head at him, then spoke again. He still couldn't understand her words, but they sounded more like real speech now, not the odd sounds she had been making earlier. He realized she had switched languages. He thought he almost recognized a few words she used, but gave it up as a bad job after a few minutes. She finally stopped speaking when she realized his confusion. She gestured as him again. "Well, my name is Uzumaki Naruto. I guess you already know that… or not? I have no clue where I am, or why you brought me here. I don't know what you hope to gain from this, but I'm in line to become Hokage, and Konoha won't take kindly to you imprisoning me."

The woman followed his words closely, he gaze intent. The grate erupted again, and there was one word he recognized from it, "Nihon-go". It was the name of the language spoken in all of the elemental countries. The woman looked startled for a moment, then shook her head, smiling. She wagged her finger at him as if her were an errant child, then turned about and left the room. Naruto had no clue what was happening, though he recognized that they had identified the language he was speaking. He guessed that they would eventually send in someone who spoke it.

He was right. Two days later, endless, bored, monotonous days which felt like weeks, they sent in a man dressed in one of those wacky suits that everyone around her wore. Naruto guessed this man was special, because he didn't have a plate of tasteless food which smelled like cardboard or a syringe filled with drugs that made him sleep, or another fucking bedpan. He carried a small personal computer and looked older than God.

"Did they send you to clean my asshole, or to feed me more of the pig-shit that they call food?" asked the disgruntled ninja, his face set into a scowl.

"Neither," responded the old man, in perfect Japanese, "They sent me in because I speak your language." Naruto goggled.

"Finally!" shouted the overactive blonde. "I've been trying to talk to these other people forever, but no one understands my speech. I'm in a foreign land, aren't I? How far did you fuckers take me from the Land of Fire, anyway! The Hokage will track me down, she's my adoptive grandmother, after all. You had better let me go."

The old man's eyes lit up, though he looked quite puzzled. "I don't even know where this "Fire Land" is located. If you let me, I'll explain the circumstances of your being here as best as I can, and after that I'll be translating for the people who run this place." The old man's wrinkled skull contorted in thought. "Though, I'm not sure I believe even half of what they told me about you…"

Naruto growled. "Please, explain the situation to me." His face went rigid.

The old man smiled. "First, let me introduce myself. My name is Wu Hiro. I am a professor of anthropology and ancient language. I was asked to translate for you, as I am one of only about one hundred people alive who speak Japanese.." Naruto's face remained a mask of stone. "You are in this place, because it is a hospital, and you were near death when you were found. You are also in this place because it is a military hospital, and our hosts do not know if you are dangerous or not. Another reason you are in this place is that no one seems to know what you really are, and the authorities don't know what to do with you." The bald gentleman paused for a moment, then continued. "I don't know how to tell you the next part so that you will believe me, so I will first ask you a question. What is the last thing that you remember, before waking up here?"

Naruto had been asking himself this same question for the past two days. He thought he had a pretty good answer, but it troubled him, because it was totally insane. He had been on a mission in Bird Country, to rid a village of a particularly large band of mercenaries, rumored to contain a few low ranking ninja. As the top Jounin in Konoha, it was nothing he couldn't handle. Except that the intelligence department had made a huge mistake. The gang included at least four A-rank ninja, one of whom was a user of the extremely rare crystal element techniques. Another of them had been a genjutsu user, his absolute worst weakness. With all four of them attacking at once, he was unable to stop the genjutsu user before he found himself trapped in a particularly powerful illusion. Nothing compared to Itachi or Madara's Tsukoyomi, but it did the job. After the genjutsu took hold, he felt was his skin being coated in crystal, then nothing. His next memory was waking up here.

Still, this man was a foreigner and possibly an enemy, so Naruto decided to play his cards close to his vest. "I don't exactly remember… I think I might have passed out?" He knew that he sounded convincing, he wasn't a ninja for nothing. He had been taking lessons in subterfuge for years now, learning from the best in preparation to take Tsunade's job from her.

The old man nodded, "Well, something happened alright. If you don't know what occurred, then no one alive does. Two years ago, a collector of rare antiquities died, and his collection was donated to a museum. Part of the collection was a crystal larger than a man, a type of crystal never seen before. The museum allowed scientists to study the crystal, and it was found to be hollow. Subsequent tests indicated that something was inside of it… Something that several of them believed was alive. Their best guess was that the crystal was some sort of life-support device, though it contained no power source they could find. Eventually, after thirteen years of study, they decided to open the crystal. Inside… was you."

Naruto shuddered. Looking at Hiro, he knew the old man spoke the truth. "How long… Where am I?" He could barely speak.

The ancient professor hesitated, "They tested the crystal. There is a method to tell how old an object is, called carbon dating. It's between 1,500-2,500 years old. I don't know if this will mean anything to you, but this is the year 2515, and you are on a planet called Ariel, in a planetary system know as The Verse. Earth, you planet and the homeworld of humanity, was abandoned over four hundred years ago."

Naruto fainted.

~&~&~&~&~&~&~&~

Author's Note: So, yeah. I don't think there's a Naruto/Firefly crossover out there, so I made one. If I'm wrong, please give me a link. I have a rough outline of what I have planned for his story, but I wouldn't be adverse to some input. I think it's safe to say that at some point our resident jinchurikki will run into the beloved crew of a certain freighter ship. Mischief will surely ensue. I'm pretty excited about this fic, and it's my first crossover, so please review if you want me to continue it.