Story: Pupaphilia: Beautiful Loser

Author: Englicana

Source: Naruto

Pairing: Sasori x Deidara

Warning: YAOI. Boy x Boy. Don't like, don't read.

Rating: M for later sex and probably other stuff.

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. The plot of the fic and any character deviations in my odd little naruverse do belong to me though.

A/N 1: This will be OOC and AU. Obviously. For there to be yaoi there has to be OOC. For Sasori to be alive there has to be AU. I've just taken a bit of liberty with OOC and AU ness... Also, I'm not anywhere near up-to-date with the anime or manga so there will be inconsistencies with the plot. For instance... I haven't the foggiest how Deidara gets new arms but I'm pretty sure he does due to photobucket and spoilers. I'm writing this in the dark and doing it my way XD. Therefore, this is set in my own Naruverse! Huzzah! That way everything can happen how I want it, and you get a little insight into my... odd little mind. ^_^. Enjoy!

A/N 2: The story title comes what I've decided should be the name for a fetish for puppets. I couldn't find the existence of any name for such a fetish so took the latin for doll (pupa) and added philia. If pupaphobia can exist then so can pupaphilia!

The chapter title is a William Control song. Seeing as I was listening to him when I started writing 3. Sasori may have lost, but he's still pretty ^_^.

Beautiful Loser

"Danna!"

"Danna un!

The blond rushed through what was left of the cave searching for his danna's body, hoping the Konoha shinobi were wrong. Hoping his danna had tricked them, fooled them into thinking he was dead while he actually escaped. It was a slim hope, but he clung to it nonetheless. Desperately he jumps through the fallen rocks and broken puppets until...

He stopped and his heart cracked.

Not one but two bodies. One, an empty shell, the other a crumbled heap, blood dripping out of it's core.

His master had tried to trick them but failed.

"Danna..." Deidara held back tears, jaw clenched tightly.

His danna.

His partner.

His love.

Gone?

There had to be something...anything... that could bring his master back. He searched the bodies. He searched the ground. Nothing. And no trace of his ring.

Deidara frowned. Who would've taken his love's ring?

That was when he sensed them.

Damnit! How did I not notice before!

He span round to see Tobi and Zetsu watching him. Tobi was holding Sasori's ring.

"Teme..."

He launched himself into an argument. After less than a minute of pointless shouting with Tobi Deidara gave up. He jumped at him, stole the ring with his teeth and sped off. (1)

Finally! I have the ring! Now I need my own...

The blond probably should have searched for his own ring and arm first but all he could think about was reaching Sasori.

He'd hadn't even waited to see if his suicide clone had worked.

xxxxxxx

"Shit"
Deidara groaned. Upon his arrival back at the base he had tossed his arm onto the desk in his and Sasori's room and collapsed in a mixture of emotions on the chair.

"ShitShitShit! Un!"

How the hell am I supposed to fix my arms! Two in the space of a few days! Shit!

Deidara's anger faded.

and danna...

He shook his head. Once he had his arms back he could go and retrieve Sasori's body. Then he could do something... hopefully...

He sighed as he trudged his way down to Sasori's workshop, careful not to trip in the dark as he had no arms to brace himself. He must have some bodies he hasn't converted yet... If I can steal an arm and a... bit... I can sew with my teeth. It'll do. I can fix it properly later.

He hadn't quite worked it all out yet but figured trial and error would work fine.

He broke into the storage 'closet' and gaped.

WHAT THE HELL? That's...ew un!

It turns out that Sasori's closet was more of a giant storage room... and it certainly did have a body with usable arms. Several of them. Several bodies, all separated into usable parts and neatly stored and marked.

Right... um... I'll ignore that for now, un... He grimaced. I need a nice arm...

He scanned the shelves until he found a suitable pair. A pair similar to his own. He picked them up by their wrapping and moved to Sasori's work table, kicking the closet door shut.

With a blade between his teeth he set to work at cutting the arms to the right length. One to attach to his shoulder, the other to go between his stump and his recovered arm. Thankfully, the arms had been drained of blood, which meant they were clean, usable and the whole thing wouldn't result in him have a face full of blood.

Next he managed to, after several minutes, thread a needle with his teeth and tongue and began to sew one of the arms onto the stump left after Kakashi's attack. It took him a long time but was actually surprisingly easy once he got the hang on bending and using his teeth and tongue in such a way(2)...and got over the irritating pricks as he threaded the needle through his un-anaesthetised skin again and again.

Once he'd got that arm on he started clenching and unclenching his fists, moving the joint and generally getting his blood flowing the nerves firing. When satisfied, he started on the other, this time with the use of his new hand.

xxxxxxx

Deidara braced himself as he reached the cave again. He didn't want to have to see his master's deceased body again but he had to come back and claim it before the place was destroyed to remove evidence. It wasn't for a purely emotional reason; if there was a way to bring him back Sasori would be pissed if he didn't have that body. That, and Deidara would probably need the core to do any kind of resurrection.

Resurrect Sasori.

That was the only reason why Deidara hadn't broken down. He believed there was a way to bring the puppet master back. There had to be. He had no real purpose if there wasn't. Sasori had made him feel at home with Akatsuki, even though they constantly argued over art, and the blond certainly wasn't going to work with anyone else.

He pulled the deactivated trap off of Sasori's body pinned to the wall, catching the puppet form as it fell. He placed it gently on the cart he'd brought and checked everything was intact. Perfect. Barely even a scratch. Master would be pleased.

Then he moved to the other body. The one with the core. And the swords. And the blood... and the eyes.

The ex-Iwagakure ninja didn't know if he could bare to look into the eyes again. Open and staring. Sasori had always had emotionless eyes, and very often looked spine-tinglingly creepy, but they never looked lifeless. Not like this.

Gulping as he disentangled his love's lifeless puppet form from his 'mother and father', he pushed the opposing puppets out of the way, clueless as to who they were meant to be. He then used directed small bombs to break the sword so only the parts inside the core were left, with a bit to pull them out with when he was ready. It would also make the body easier to add to the cart.

Taking one last look around, he gathered up his puppet master's last form and belongings and adding them to the cart. Resolutely not looking into his eyes.

He covered the cart with the black cloth before jumping on to the back of his giant clay spider which dragged it back to the base.

xxxxxxx

"Deidara"

The blond froze. What the hell did he want?

"What, un?"

"Pein-sama wants to see you." (3)

Damnit. This'll be about our complete and utter failure.

"Right, un."

The black haired boy looked at the cart, Deidara had literally just got back to the base.

"Is that him?"

Deidara looked down and swallowed, sudden emotions bringing a lump to his throat.

"...yeah"

The Uchiha nodded, still looking at the cloth.
"What do you intend to do with him?"

Damnit! Stop saying him! It's not him! He's coming back! I was doing so well at ignoring it all! Those are just his bodies...! Not himself! They're 'it's! Not 'him's! Deidara was feverishly struggling to contain himself, the constant reminder of his loss was weakening his resolve to leave thinking about it till later. He couldn't handle having to think about the loss of his danna. If everyone started acting like he was gone... Deidara would lose himself. He had to bring him back soon. But he still had no idea how... He had didn't even know where to start.

Itachi blinked, was the blond ever going to reply? He seemed lost in thought. The raven haired man decided not to wait, the other clearly needed time and, rather than being understanding, he had his own things to be getting on with. Such as recovering certain possessions from an annoying theiving fish man...(4)

When Deidara snapped out of his thoughts he realised he'd managed to walk to Sasori's workshop again... and had no idea what had happened with Itachi.

"Ah...un"

I guess I better get this over with quickly, then go to Pein.

The blond entered, somehow dragging the cart down the stairs that led to the basement-like workshop without killing himself in the process. Quite a feat, considering he was an armless wreck and the cart was pretty heavy.

Deidara stared at the sheet.

"I... un. I'll come back and... later... I'll... un"

He couldn't deal with uncovering the bodies and storing them right now. They'd be safe enough as they were, and he wouldn't be long, although he wanted to do something about the core very soon. Leaving it with metal poking through it couldn't be a good idea. But Pein was waiting and he didn't want to suffer the repurcussions for being late, so he headed on out.

Pausing at the door of the work shop he looked back before rushing to their leader.

Goodbye for now Sasori-danna.

A/N 3: So! That's that! Chapter 1! Um... kinda dramatic in an...emo-kun way. Ish. =/. but that's all good!

Reviews, messages and faves/alerts make me write faster! Seriously. I need reminders of I'll get caught up doing something else!

As for where the story is going... I know how he's going to bring Sasori-sexy-sama back, but after that I'm clueless. But I daydream about them far too much as it is so something will come to me soon! ^_^

I've been wanting to write a Sasori x Deidara for the past week or two. It needed to be done. My way. XD. There aren't enough long SxD fics!

Speaking of pairings lacking good fics... I might have to write a Kankuro x Gaara soon. (No! Stop me! This is the kind of distraction I don't need!)
*wave*

Bye for now!

(1) The little bit you see of Tobi after Sasori's... ahem... IT'S NOT TRUE. I DENY IT! Anyway. After that... that's the only bit I've seen of him at the time of writing. And I've seen very little of Zetsu either. So... you can understand why the dialogue was skipped. That... and I don't think I would have written it even if I did know anything about them.

(2) I realise it isn't possible to sew your own arms on.. with your teeth. Or to have a dead arm newly sewn on work straight away like Dei's. BUT I DON'T CARE! ¬¬. He did it! Okay! Don't argue! It's my Naruverse, damnit! *dramatic tears*

(3) I have never met Pein. XD I know his name and that's it. I don't even know what he looks like. What I know comes from other fics. Aren't I good? ^_^

(4) …Yeah... Itachi and Kisame might be coming into this at points. *nod* and, if they do, Kisame WILL be referred to as fish boy and the like.