Chapter Thirty five- The best idea you'll never have

The room was flooded with every sound ever heard, the stomping of frenzied feet, the crying of two frightened hybrid children, wood against wood as doors were slammed shut only to be torn almost of the hinges only a moment later, bed springs shifting as a man awoke to find his love and wife unconscious on the carpeted floor, glass breaking due to the frenzied feet and the tones of a dozen people both whispering and shouting questions, answers and profanities. To many different voices were calling too many things at once. Even with my advanced hearing I could only put together a few chunks of half the sentences bouncing around the crowded room.

"..a steady beat at least.."

"Second time in a week…"

"…again? How many times do you think…"

"…blood or iv? Both or…."

"..please, what happened? What's wrong with her?"

"…cpr? Is she not breathing?"

I did the only thing i could decide to do. I picked up the crying children and carried them away from the panic and horrific scene.

I don't remember walking down the stairs or sitting down I the chair. Millie pulled me out of my shock; she pulled my hair, hard. It was not the pain since there was none, but the act it's self. Millie took pride in acting unlike a child in every way. She loved to stun her mother by quoting Shakespeare while other children her age are barely reading about green eggs and ham. But now this little girl sat with her hands gripping a tuft of my brown hair as if I was her last life line. Tear nipped at her eyes, she angrily scrubbed them away before they could touch her cheeks.

"I didn't see it aunt Bella." She whispered terrified.

"I don't understand. I see everything. I didn't see mommy get hurt! I..why…mommy!" She threw her head against my shoulder letting the walls fall and simply crying. Nathan sobbed silently along with his sister while Renesmee watched on with a piteous expression.

We sat that way, me and the children, for an uncountable amount of time. It could have been days that I sat there, the tears of Emma's children soaking into my clothes, while my mind searched for some reasoning behind this unexplainable development.

Carlisle's foot steps had all four of us on our feet rushing to him.

"Carlisle.." The broken pain in his eyes answered all of my questions.

My husband came behind him and handed Carlisle a book before disappearing back up the stairs.

I placed the children on make shift beds made from heavy quilts and extra soft pillows. Millie and Nathan sat together with their hands intertwined and foreheads touching in silent confused mourning. The tv in front of them buzzed and flashed the images of their favorite monsters, the first movie they ever watched with their mother. I wasn't sure if it was a comfort or salt in the wound.

I kissed each motionless child on their tear stained cheeks and turned to the stairs. Up stairs seemed like more another country and less the second floor of my family's home. When my foot touched the first step I felt more human then I can remember feeling my entire human life. The stair under my graceful foot creaked under the faint pressure. I jumped off, nearly losing my balance. I could feel the confused stares coming from behind me. I tried again, placing my foot on the first stair and letting the pressure slowly down. The next stair I took just as carefully, each stair I treated as if it were made of glass. When I reached the last stair I just stood there. Unsure of where to go or why I had even made the journey.

The low whisper of voices and machine noises pulled me to the room where my friend was kept. The scene behind the door was nothing short of heart breaking or what I had expected. The Cullen men, minus Carlisle, made a death march around the room checking the various instruments for Emma's safety. When I walked in Edward was reading the heartbeat monitor. He looked up as I entered and was at my side pulling me into his arms the next second.

"Love what are you doing up here? You don't need to see her like this. We have everything under control." My hand placed gently over his mouth and a soft glare were all that was needed to remind him I didn't need or want the protection. He nodded and with a deep kiss, stepped out of my way but kept a wary eye on me as I made my way to her side.

"Where are the others?" I hadn't noticed anyone coming down the stairs after I had other then him and Carlisle, but honestly I hadn't noticed much.

"Esme is shopping with rose. Alice is doing the Landry and Sam and Jacob went back to the reservation for a bit to sort something's out."

"Wait, what about Raina?" I felt a sudden wave of panic, we needed her for more then just her punishment, Seth was still under the spell of the false imprint.

"With me Bella." Alice's voice floated from the basement mixing with the steady hum of the washer.

"She should wake up soon." Emmett replaced the empty blood bag with a full A positive.

"You found out why she's like this?"

"She was starved." Nathaniel's voice was barley a whisper. He had taken up the same spot by her side as before. He knelt near her head stroking her hair needlessly out of her eyes, pulling the blanket up to her chin then a minute later pulling it down to her shoulders. He would hold her hand with one hand and fidget with the other. He didn't look up form her when he spoke.

"She starved herself." He bent his head to hers.

"Carlisle thinks it was malnutrition. For a vampire we become weak for a human it could mean…" We both turned to Nathaniel the unspoken word too clearly hanging in the air.

"We caught it in time." Jasper tired his best to sound convincing but something in his eyes told me he wasn't certain.

I moved to stand at Emma's other side, Edward followed me step for step. I took his hand and lead him with me. We just looked down at her, not breathing or speaking and the room was once again an eerie quite. Jasper and Emmett continued their work with the machines and different charts.

Emma's skin was a sickly pale, not the color of a vampire but the color of a ill or...dying human. A tube had been forced down her throat for breathing; each hiss of the large box machine hooked to the tube coincided with the slight rise of her chest. There was no color in her cheeks or skin period. One arm remained constantly tucked under the hazel blanket. The other pale thin arm was secured with an iv and the hand of that arm had never been empty. Her eye lids seemed translucent against her motionless eyes to where I was sure I could see the green through them.

I raised my hand, I needed to touch her. Just to prove she was here. This petite figure dwarfed in the too large bed with the needles and blood and tubes was my friend. My sister in unlikely circumstances was once again lying in this hospital bed waiting for something. For death to end all her struggles or some hazy sign of hope.

"No." The rough voice growled at me.

My hand froze but did not retreat. Again, again this girl was suffering for her love. For him, how many times would he push her to the brink of death before the luck ran out. I am too angry to see any answer but the fault was his.

My fingers twitched which brought another warning growl. My hand hadn't even begun to move before a hand grabbed my wrist too tightly. Edward and Nathaniel growled and snarreled at each other. I pulled back and my hand was released. I placed the freed hand on Edwards cheek, he kissed my wrist, but his eyes never left nathaniels. I felt all the anger rise to the surface, every beep of the machine or hiss of air forced into the girls lungs pushed me further. I couldn't take anymore. I turned for my husband completely certain I was going meet the eyes of Emma's killer. Instead I meet the eyes of a man suffering the torments of hell. His eyes were drawn, wide and angry; I couldn't blame him, not when I saw it paled in comparison to how completely he blamed himself. There was no debating or soothing it. If Emma died it would be the end of Nathaniel, not the way it would have if she had just died, but human causes or some act of fate as a vampire. He will have killed her and he knew it. Her death, the death of the one person he loved, would be on his hands.

"I'm so sorry Nathaniel." The words slipped from my lips. He blinked, stunned at the words almost as much as I was. He bent his head and I turned woodenly away from them. It was not my pain to feel or my worries to suffer. There didn't seem to be any left, he had taken the burden onto himself.

Edward understood as he always did. He walked with me to the door before I turned to leave he took my hand. I immediately turned back into his arms; we held each other in perfect understanding. We could not survive that kind of lose and neither would Nathaniel.

I returned to the children and Carlisle. He sat where I had left him on the couch with his nose in the book. I picked the sleeping children from the bed and held them tightly in my arms. I sat in the recliner so the children could lie on my lap. Renesmee sat on the arm of my chair. I stoked her hair and whispered soft conversations with her as to not disturb Carlisle or the sleeping children.

Eventually an uncomfortable sort of silence descended on the house. There was a lulling scuffling of foot steps and the constant beeping of a distant machine that gave off a sleepy numbness.

As if from some old cartoon rerun Carlisle, with out warning, leapt from the couch and called for Edward. Jasper, Edward and Emmett were at his side all staring into the book before the second syllable has passed his lips. I gathered the grumpy children from the floor where I had unintentionally tossed them when I jumped from my seat as soon as Carlisle had.

"Do you think Carlisle?" Edward asked as he stared at the words Carlisle was point at in the tattered book I had never seen before.

"It's the best we have son."

"It does make the most sense. Have you heard of anything like it before?"

"I heard of it in passing. It's the kind of thing you never speak about above a whisper. It is an incredible power."

"What are you talking about?" I nearly screamed. The back and forth was driving me crazy. I was not in the mood for verbal tennis.

"Bella." Carlisle looked at me as if we were sitting on an explosive. "Nathaniel's power…his power is life."

Hello! Yes i am still writing this story! Surprised? yeah me too! Sigh, i've been so busy my poor story was all but forgotten. But do not fear, i really love this story and do plan to finish.

Please review and/or ask any questions you make have. Thank you all!