Ashina: I have a new story! Yay! So this time my seme (yes, I am a proud uke) decided to butt herself into this and put up her own comments so blame her for the intro being long.

Mirai: WTF man! Here I am, coming to love you up and you make me feel like shit? Well then, I don't think you'll mind if I tell the entire audience that—

Ashina: Please don't, Master-sama. (suddenly wearing collar and chain) Forgive me!

Mirai: That's better. (devilish smirk)

Ashina: Oh my gosh! Did you know they're doing a remake of "Ai no Kusabi"? I know! I freaked when I heard about it! I don't entirely remember where I read it...maybe aarinfantasy... ooh! But it comes out this fall! (does supa happy dance)

Mirai: What's that?

Ashina: (dies)

Warnings: M-preg, OOCness, yaoi, a delicious lemon squeeze... anything else?

Disclaimer: Not mine. This sucks.

Note: Some female characters in this story have had their genders reassigned (of course not willingly; I forced them). Their names remain the same, but their sex has been changed for the sake of the plot. Not like I liked them anyways...well, maybe TenTen... but that's because she doesn't piss me off by pursuing guys she shouldn't.

This chapter has been edited - 20. 01. 11 - A number of reviewers mentioned that I had a couple of problems with this story and the sequel matching up, as well as the flow of this story not being as smooth as it could be. So I decided to a little bit of clean up. Though I didn't bother to mention that this had initially started out as a one-shot, and thus I'm coming up with the plot as I go along, I recognized that I needed to fix what I could.

-U R Darkest's Pawn-


Uchiha Sasuke, prince of the Underworld, has been ordered by the Supreme, Uchiha Fugaku, to find himself a suitable wife and mate to continue the Uchiha line of demons. He has been given a matter of one hundred and sixty-eight hours, a week in the mortal time, to search out and select his partner.

Sasuke blinked again. He had reread the letter a number of times now, at least ten, and he still couldn't make sense of it. At the age of nineteen, he had figured that his parents had finally given up on his duty to continue the clan (for he'd reached maturity a year ago). And besides, his older brother had done quite a fine job with all of his partners.

He thought that the only thing that might bother them was if he were to bring a hooker home. Truthfully, all they wanted was to keep their bloodline going, to keep their family in power.

"They're all the same." he scoffed, chucking the paper which he'd crumpled over his shoulder. "It's just about the power. That's all it ever is."

Demons were fortunate, or unfortunate (depending on one's views), creatures. They lived lives that spanned beyond centuries, but were still mortal. They died when it was their time, but they lived to watch and witness the foolishness of mortals, which many of them had come to believe had been set up for their entertainment. The irrational actions of humans sustained their lives almost as well as everything else in their environment.

Unlike many of the idiotic mortals believed, the Underworld was a plentiful place. Nothing lacked. It was like the Earth of the Mortal World without its many problems. As a matter of fact, after spending so many years looking up at their sky, at the world above theirs, it was like this place was better than that one. At least here there were no problems with getting laid...

Many laughed at how so many people suffered from lack of sexual satisfaction, because it was an unfathomable thing in this world. Being a society of all men, libidos raged long and almost never had their fill. Not unless one was to settle down with someone and be married.

This brought Sasuke back to his original problem of having to find someone to reproduce his bloodline with. His past of constantly changing lovers bothered his parents.

Though his brother had done the same thing, he had at least the patience to become a polygamist rather than just a person to sleep around. He had married every single one of his lovers and decided to trade off nights with his "wives".

His father, the King of Amartia(1), one of the wealthier countries in the Underworld, had been letting slip a few subtle suggestions for him to find a permanent partner, or even a few if he so wished, as long as that would mean he could continue their family.

Even his daddy, Mikoto, had begged him to listen to his father. His other father's gentle and "motherly" disposition often won out over his rebellious side, as it had in this situation.

Sasuke glanced once more around his room, making sure there was not a single book or paper out of place before he transported himself to the mortal world.

The sunlight was far too hot. The air was dirty; it smelled of burned up gasoline and sweat, and yet it was four in the afternoon.

The Uchiha readjusted his sunglasses, ones that he'd brought from the Underworld because of his own arrogance, as he headed down the street.

The loud honking cars and the bustling people creating the din gave him such a headache. In resignation, he checked into a hotel to wait until the night.

Somewhere in Los Angeles, the Uchiha prince found himself staring up at a brightly lit neon sign. Gentlemen's Exorcist Club ~ Let us bring out the Demon in you.


A strip club that claimed to be able to release a man's inner beast…

He pushed open the barred door, the chains hanging from the ceiling barely touching him as he stealthily made his way through the hazy red-tainted atmosphere. There were platforms with boys, yes boys (they couldn't have been any older than seventeen), dancing around cold metal poles.

His eyes scanned over the lot of them, barely developed children wearing fishnet shirts and leather pants. Taking a place farthest away from the entertainment, he flagged down a waiter and continued to observe.

The man walked over with an overly-friendly smile. His bright pink hair, short and framing, distracted the demon for a moment; sea green eyes captured his and a very suggestive smile flashed in his direction. His outfit consisted of mini black shorts, those of which had belts connecting them to his dark red, half-shirt (that outlined his nipples) as well as to his knee-high boots. He had three piercings in each ear, and a black hair clip to match. (A/N: gag...I hate her!)

"Is there anything I can get you, Master?" the man asked.

Sasuke glanced at his nametag, "Actually, Sakura, I was looking for someone who might be able to assist me."

The rosette smiled. "Well, sir, all of our performers and waiters," he accompanied with a wink, "are all trained to be of service to the Masters who walk into our haven. What might you need assistance with?"

"I'm looking to find myself a suitable person for tonight only. Do you think you might be able to help me?" He asked, a devious smile playing on his lips.

"Mmm…I think I might be able to find someone to help with your sin…" he laughed coyly, batting his eyelashes at the demon prince.

Suddenly, the entire aura of the club changed. A combination of fog and pale white and blue lights had sprung up on the main stage. A man's voice came over the intercom and Sasuke witnessed how every person, whether waiter, performer, or patron, seemed to have their attention drawn towards the single spot where the lights focused.

"Attention Masters and pets, if you wouldn't mind directing your attention to the center stage, we'd like to present our top dancer for tonight, please keep your eyes open or else you might miss our delicious young boy, Naruto!"

Darkness shot through the room. No one made a sound, but anticipation crawled on the prince's skin. What were they all so anxious for?

A blonde. A beautiful blonde with captivating blue eyes. His tanned skin contrasted beautifully with the outfit he donned. A white corset and matching thong. However, there was something different about this boy which sent pleasurable electricity through Sasuke.

Ah… could it possibly have been the allure the human commanded? His cerulean eyes were depth-less, and rather than stay on the stage, he stepped down those velvety blue stairs with a sultry expression.

The music played softly, no longer a thumping dance tune. Now, it had transformed itself to be a sensual jazz piece led by an alto saxophone.

The way those slim hips swayed as their owner strutted around the tables spelled all. His claiming smile graced very few men, those of which had forgotten about their own performers before them. It was strange, though, that even those boys had trouble keeping focused on their jobs.

And then Naruto came to a halt in front of him. His eyes widened for a slight moment, betraying the playful smile on his lips.

Sasuke watched, entranced, as the angel in white climbed onto his table and perched before him.

The prince could feel the lust rolling off of him in waves.

Demons, particularly those without other bloods to interfere, had the capability to sense emotions. Pure blood came with many perks.

'This one looks like a real wild one… pretty boys always are.'

Then again, be able to read their minds didn't hurt either.

Sasuke chuckled to himself, letting his eyes wander along the boys every slope.

'So he likes me?' The boy thought happily. He sat himself down in front of the dark-haired man and gracefully slipped into his lap, running a hand silkily over the Uchiha's clothed chest.

As he had suspected, wearing his royal attire (dark slacks, a white button up, and a royal blue jacket) definitely attracted humans much more than any slum-like outfits he'd seen the people around here showing off.

He lightly placed his hand on the younger boy's hip, only to hiss in pain as he felt his hair being gripped and his head pulled back. He stared directly into mischievous cerulean eyes, watching as the blonde mouthed, "If you want me, Master, you'll need to pay."

A slender, pink tongue flicked out and licked his face, from the cheekbone to his chin, before the one called Naruto moved elegantly from him back to main stage.

Sasuke watched the reactions of the others in the room, the sudden animosity they felt towards him. There was definitely something special about this single one. But what?

As the angel in white continued his way back up those stairs, he watched, knowing his own libido had been set aflame by the blonde's actions.

Naruto had not visited any other table, and he did not seem to care for more than a simple glance towards them as he slowly, with a wink in his direction, climbed back behind the curtain.

There was a dead silence that filled the area; it almost seemed to want to swallow everyone up, until the crowd burst into applause so loud it hurt the demon's ears.

The rest of the night followed so insignificantly Sasuke had almost no recollection of it. Besides the teenaged Sakura continually coming back to his table and nearly demanding that he ask something of him, the raven-haired man did not care for what else happened.

He went back to his hotel that night without a partner or a simple hired boy for his pleasure. He had wasted, well, he couldn't consider his time wasted after the performance from Naruto, spent was more the word he should use. He had spent very little of his time allotted to find his mate, and he hadn't been paying quite close attention to much of anything either. But he knew what exactly he wanted to happen.

-U R Darkest's Pawn-

The loud excitement behind in the dressing rooms flowed from the room in unadulterated waves. Tonight had been one of the most highly profited in the last month, most likely because of Naruto's performance.

At the moment, he was one of the most anticipated dancers in the club. Most of the patrons, who seemed to single off a lone boy for their favoritism, arrived early on those nights to ensure they would be treated specially by the blonde.

In the past, Naruto would often sit on their table and wrap himself around their poles (A/N: Not quite yet, loves :D) while they were ordered to remain motionless and witness their self-destruction by his "look, but don't touch" rule.

He had no idea what had possessed him that night, it possibly could have been a drugging by the fog machine. Heaven had been the only witness to the cruel prank which had been played on him when he was first recruited. The older boys had filled the machine with some sort of gaseous hallucinogen and he'd fallen down time and time again that night.

But it could have simply been the attraction he felt to that man.

The moment he'd stepped out onto that stage, his eyes had immediately locked onto the brooding dark-haired man at the back of the room. The way he so sophisticatedly held himself, even while sitting still, had placed him in some sort of trance.

He had walked past all of his usual groupies, including Sai and Neji, and walked straight back to that man's table.

The look on his face as he had approached made him blush. He had hoped the man hadn't noticed, but those onyx eyes had been locked on his face since their gazes had first met. When he'd placed himself into the pale man's lap, the heat which radiated from his slacks had made him hard in an instant. It was only too bad that he wasn't at liberty to relieve himself at that moment while demanding the man thrust into him.

Remembering how pleasantly surprised the man had been when he had tasted his skin, which by the way had been more addictive than any one man's flavor should be, made him feel aroused. His imagine ran wild as thought of what might happen if he were to finally be united with the dark-haired man.

Naruto could easily see them together. In bed, one would think such a restrained man would be an animal, a demon to be cliché. He could see the man's thick length pounding him into the bed, forcing him to beg for more, only to be denied and have his pleasure be served at the dark-haired man's will.

He shivered, the delight of his daydreams surging through him.

"Looks like someone had a bit too much fun dancing on the new customer tonight." a brunette commented as he strutted into the room.

He placed himself into the chair beside the dreaming blonde and laughed pointedly at his problem.

The blonde glanced down and found that his imagination had caused a straining erection for him. Face darkened, he tried to think of other things to get his mind off the deliciously sexy, thick-cocked, pale-skinned...shit. It wasn't working.

"Leave him alone, Kiba. I happen to know that you were quite enjoying your time on Mr. Hyuuga tonight. And you didn't seem to be too concerned with letting him know that." the redhead chided, seating himself on the other side of the blonde.

"Hey, Neji loves me. I think I might even be winning over Naruto in his heart." he replied defensively, his own thoughts running off to chase whatever delusion had formed in his head.

"Right..." Gaara replied doubtingly. The Hyuuga man had practically claimed the blonde boy as his when he'd first stepped into the strip club. There was no tearing that man away when he was focused.

However, after having been introduced to the loud-mouthed Kiba, who indeed did have other redeeming traits like a kick-ass body, he had been persuaded to let himself be served by others.

Sai, on the other hand, was just a mystery. It seemed like the only reason he ever showed up was to infuriate the blonde by touching him without permission. And then he would call him "dickless" and laugh off the whole thing, watching the boy stalk away.

"What happened to your rule, Naruto? I thought you didn't allow unworthy Masters to touch you in any way. Hell, you've never even touched any of them. What makes this one so special?" the redhead pressed, stripping off the maroon vest and matching tasseled shorts he'd been asked to wear that night, trading them in for a white t-shirt and jeans.

"Hmm?" he questioned, finally meeting the green gaze. He'd lost himself in those fantasies again that he hadn't been paying much attention to his friend's questioning.

"W-Well...I don't know." he answered anticlimactically. "Hey Gaara, have you ever just met someone and immediately found an attraction to them? One that you felt you couldn't stop? One that broke all the rules that you might have established?"

The redhead chuckled dryly. "Sounds like you're in love." he deadpanned.

"W-What? But I've never even met the guy! All I did was dance on him and..." he trailed off, the images sapping his thinking capabilities.

"Uzumaki!" Gaara cried, shaking the blonde's shoulders and glaring at him. "Pay attention!"

The blonde laughed sheepishly, rubbing his nape. But he sobered up with another threatening glance from the redhead.

"In love? Is that what it is?" he repeated, disbelief coloring his tone. How could it have possibly been that? He'd felt emotions similar to that before, but they'd been easily distinguishable as mere lust. Wasn't that what this was?

"Yeah. That just about sums it up with all of your daydreams and little Naruto's 'happiness' to keep you company." Kiba quipped with a wide smile.

"Shut up, dog-breath!" the blonde yelled as he lunged at the brunette, tackling him to the floor.

The other boys in the room chuckled at the three and their antics. It was normal commotion to be going on after their shifts. And nothing at that moment could stop their enthusiasm.

-U R Darkest's Pawn-

At around two in the morning, his car finally pulled into the driveway of his home. The light in the living room was still on, and he knew there'd by some serious questioning going on.

He drudged up the drive, dreading what his father would have planned for him.

Before he even got a chance to reach for the key, the door swung open and he flinched at the bright light.

Before him, a man of spitting image rested in the doorframe, arms crossed and displeased.

Meekly, he walked past him and placed himself on the couch. His gaze was drawn to anything besides the adult in the doorway and he almost wished he hadn't gone to work that night. Almost; but the memory of the dark-haired man kept him from being fully repentant.

"You weren't supposed to go into work tonight, Naruto." Minato began. "You promised me that you were only going to go twice a month."

"B—" the younger blonde hadn't even gotten a full syllable out before his father interrupted him again.

"I don't care what your grandfather asked you to do! It's horrible! He should realize that you're still in high school, for God's sake! You've got a cooking exam next week and you can't be spending all of this time out of the house, dancing naked for other men!"


"It doesn't matter what sort of money you're being paid! I don't approve of this any longer. Tomorrow, I'm going to walk straight up to otousan and let him know that—"

"Dad! Listen to me, please!" he practically yelled.

His father's dark blue gaze, a few shades darker than his own, bore down on him, waiting for the reason he'd interfered with his ranting.

Naruto stared right on back, the irritation of having his thoughts be stolen from right out of his head giving him the proper insolence to be able to follow through with his actions. "I know I said that I'd be only going twice a month, but I want the money. I know that you could easily pay for everything, but I want to be able to be free and have my own control over myself. Can't I at least have this freedom?"

"No, you can't." Minato stated gruffly. "Kushina would agree with me. You're too young to want freedom just yet."

At the mention of his mother, the younger Uzumaki could only purse his lips and pout.

Though she was asleep, and at the moment upstairs, nothing was safe around her. She was a fiery redheaded woman who had the debating strength of the world's best lawyer. It was frightening to live in the same household as her, much less be related...

"You're not fighting back. Why?" the elder blonde inquired suspiciously.

"Dad...I met this really amazing guy tonight. He's handsome and quiet..." It was only a half lie. So he hadn't really met the guy. Details, details...

That softened his father up. His son's love life had been nil since the beginning. The one date he'd ever been able to go out on, it was that slim because he was gay, had turned out a disaster after he'd let slip that he was a demon.

Well, a half-demon. Regardless of that, the boy he'd been in the restaurant with had stared at him dubiously for at least ten minutes before laughing it all off. That was, until Naruto practically read the storm of emotions that was going on within him.

Half-demons, born of a pureblood parent and a human, didn't get the joys of demon-hood. The human blood somehow tampered with the powers and/or abilities a full demon received.

They got maybe one or two of the original capabilities, like being able to read emotions and the ability of influence. Nothing like mind control, to the disappointment of so many horror movie makers, but simple questioning of a person's decisions and disposition. It made them rethink whatever they were doing.

It was plain to see that between father and son there were no secrets to be held.

"Is he coming back to see you?" Minato questioned.

"I-I don't know. But he looked really interested, and I really liked him." he blushed again, just remembering the man's features. He really was beautiful.

"How old is he?" the father inquired.

"Not much older than me…" He couldn't have been. He was too mature-faced to be younger, but too boyish to be older.

"Tomorrow. That is all you have to either get his number or find a way for him to meet you. That is it. And then you're done for the rest of the month. Do you understand me?" the elder blonde ruled, not fully able to continue through with his previous chiding as his son's face lit up.

"Thank you so much, Dad!" he cried as he launched himself towards his father.

They fell the floor in a laughing heap, all other emotions placated for the time being.

-U R Darkest's Pawn-

Um, yeah. I'm not much into any other yaoi pairing in the Naruto-verse besides Sasuke/Naruto, but that doesn't mean I'm averse to it. I would much rather have paired Gaara and Neji together, but it our little sandman doesn't seem to be the type to boast and brag, so Kiba got first dibs.

And I'm not entirely sure that Minato would be okay with his son being a dancer at a strip bar, but I would think that he's the understanding type. Kushina...heh. I really want to just freaking meet her in person. She seems like she'd be so AWESOME! And yes, the all-time cliché of Jiraiya as Naruto grandfather has once again been met headfirst (if you didn't get that). If you've got any confusion on the difference between purebloods and half-demons, I'd be willing to answer questions in your reviews or by PM.

This originally was only supposed to be a one-shot, but it sort of got too long for that. Please review or NO SEX FOR YOU!

(1) Amartia: The westernmost continent in the Underworld – often compared to America in the Mortal World