If I Had Known

By: Sokai

Disclaimer: It is sad, but very true. I, Sokai, do not claim ownership to the wonderfully great Takeuchi Naoko and Toei produced tokusatsu television series, "Pretty Guardian Sailormoon," which is a part of Takeuchi-sama's "Bishoujo Senshi Sailormoon" metaseries. Nor do I claim to own any of her brilliant characters. However, I can/do claim to own the plot/storyline to this oneshot of mine.

Note: Yay!! The site finally listened to me and just added PGSM to the TV Show category! Now, we fellow fans to the live action incarnation of Sailormoon won't have to search forever and a day for JUST PGSM related fics, within the near 30,000 Sailormoon anime/manga archive! :Dances: Kaloo, kalay! LoL Anyway, and so, in celebration, I thought I'd write this quick (as in short) lil' oneshot, featuring the adorably adorable subtext couple, Rei-chan and Minako-chan.

And double yay. I get to be the first "official" PGSM submission. LoL

This story/oneshot was created/written in April 2009.

If I had known, truly known, that you would no longer be here after today, I'd have smiled more. I'd have been a little less abrasive and judgmental, and more of the ray of sunshine, of hope -- Perhaps like Usagi, even -- you greatly deserved.

I'd have gone to see you every day, whether or not you'd be busy with your idol affairs or I with my responsibilities as miko. Even if you had been out of the country, I would have found a way to be there, much like, again, how Usagi had been willing to do the very same for Mamoru.

I'd have called you more, actually talking freely with you about anything -- Everything, without the great reservations I've always placed upon myself.

I'd have revealed more about myself, my life, and asked more about yours -- This life, the present, and separate from the one of the past which continued to hold a firm grasp upon you day by day, even nearly to the very last.

I'd have gone to you with more positive and uplifting matters, other than senshi business and no matter how dire, and not have allowed a single wrinkle of a frown to ever etch itself upon your fair countenance.

To see you display that soft, thoughtful and almost melancholy smile of yours that had become quite a rarity over time, indeed, I'd have even sung more -- Just for you, and you alone.

Most importantly, if I'd have known, without any insurmountable doubt, that you would no longer be here, right here, beside me upon this earth we as Sailor Senshi have continually fought so very hard to protect, I'd have told you, without hesitation, that I loved you.

No. Love you.

I'd have told you, every single time I saw you, how effortlessly you take my breath away by your astounding beauty, how weak you make my knees become whenever I was lucky enough to be near you, or how fast my heart would beat behind my breastplate every time you would have said my name.

And oh, how sweetly did you say my name, and how much I'd secretly yearned to hear no one else but you speak it again and again -- Especially your nickname for me.

"Mars Reiko."

Like sweet nectar to a frenzied bee, your voice had been.

That was what I had been to you, in truth. A mere bee, always on the move and distractedly passing through life, while constantly desiring to partake within the saccharine taste of its prize.

And that was what you had been to me, perhaps right from the very start. A prize, one adorned so beautifully within near etherealness that I could never dare touch nor attempt to ever claim as my own.

But, oh, how I'd always wished that I could.

And even if it had turned out that all you would have desired was mere friendship, I'd have been honestly all right with that, as your companionship, however brief, had been one of the greatest treasures I have ever known to luckily possess.

In the end, it seems, I'd have given my very soul to have yours returned . . . if I had known.

-- The End

(A.N. Yay, little brief oneshots are fun. LoL Not my honest specialty, so to speak, as I honestly have them a lot longer – My fics, in general, really LoL – but I thought it was still nice. Short and sweet. Besides, in the frantic, grieving state Rei had been in once she had learned of Minako's death and even still thereafter, I'm pretty sure things of the brief nature was all she could handle in terms of thinking about Minako, the pain was still ripe, etc. Anyway, as I'd said, it'd just come to me on the fly, with me really putting myself in Rei's shoes, God forbid, and riddled with so much regret for the one I'd loved but would have never gotten a chance to say so, etc. But yeah! Yay for PGSM and me asking the site to finally add it to the TV show categories. LoL Hope you enjoyed it!)