He came to me with that look on his face. He didn't have to say anything, I knew what had happened. Sam had looked at me with those same eyes before he told me that he loved Emily. Imprinting; it was my curse, my cross to bear; fate kicking me when I was already crawling on the ground. He opened his mouth to speak but then closed it again. Words failed him. Words failed me.
I paced back and forth not knowing how to break the silence that was weighing me so far down that I wanted to fall to my knees and scream with anguish. But I was Leah Clearwater, and I never lost control like that.
"I'm sorry," he finally speaks softly, his voice drenched in sadness, his brown eyes staring into mine with an intensity that made me shiver. He was my sun, but my sun was burning out, leaving me for an imprint. He was the angel who had saved me from wallowing in self pity over Sam. I should have known, I shouldn't have expected him to stay by my side forever. His arms reach for me but I back away. He opens his mouth to speak again but this time I beat him to it.
"I honestly believed in you Jacob Black, I can't believe I was so stupid."
"Leah," he whispers, his voice tortured and I wanted to believe that the pain in his voice was real, but it wasn't, it couldn't be. No imprintee cared what happened to me after they imprinted. I shook my head backing away from him, tears falling from my eyes.
"I should have known better, I should have known."
And I turned and ran.
I must be a sucker for punishment to be sitting here at Renesmee's 1st birthday party. It was princess themed. Jacob's precious little imprint is dressed in a beautiful dress fit for the spoiled child that she was. I envied and hated her. Jacob was there of course, never too far away, coming to her every beck and call. I stood as close to the woods as possible and lit up a cigarette inhaling and exhaling slowly. I looked the complete opposite to a princess I was sure. My torn jeans hung from my hips; I hadn't been eating much lately. A stained tank top, dark hoodie, I was more the dirty peasant than the princess. I watched in pain as my Jacob…no…I watch as her Jacob bounds over to her laughing, and sweeps her off her feet into his arms. She giggles and laughs like the five year old child that she appears to be. I had forced myself to come here today in hopes that seeing them together would help me forget him, but it only made me hurt worse. The bloodsucker that could feel emotions was staying clear of me today, I couldn't blame him. Not for the first time I asked myself why I kept torturing myself like this. Forks was a small town, La Push an even smaller reservation, if I could just leave, if I could just escape, maybe I would be able to survive. I knew though that I could never leave, I would never leave and that realization killed me. Seeing Jacob kiss Renesmee's cheek lovingly was the last straw. Even if I couldn't leave La Push, I could still leave this stupid party. I put out my cigarette on the trunk of the tree and turned and stalked into the forests. No one would notice I was gone, in fact some people, like emotion leech, would probably be glad I left.
I was just about to undress to phase when I heard his voice.
"Leah please don't go."
"I can't stay," I whispered my voice broken as I turned to face him, and the concern on Jacob's face broke my heart. Why did he have to care so much?
"Then I'll come with you," Jacob said strongly but I saw the pain flash over his face at the thought of leaving her. His precious imprint.
"Don't jump up on your white horse for me Jake, I'm no princess," I grin sarcastically and then give a dry laugh, "I'm the big bad wolf in this fractured fairytale."
I then turned and phased right out of my clothes. Jacob didn't follow me. I kind of wished that he would, but I said it myself, I wasn't the princess, I was the big bad wolf, and the prince didn't run after the big bad wolf. He never would.
Seth was worried about me; I could tell. He had been there through the Sam break up, but I think he found it hard to fix me this time, since he never really knew how close Jake and I had become. Seth kept checking in on me, like he did just now, poking his head into my room.
"Want to watch a movie sis?" he asks hopefully and I shake my head offering him a weak smile. He smiles back, though his is forced and exits my room closing my door behind him.
I stroll to my window and light up. I don't even like smoking, but I think it kind of suits dark, brooding, broken hearted Leah. Jacob's face flashes through my head. If he was here he would tell me to stop smoking, that no one likes kissing a girl with smoke breath. But he wasn't here, he was with her. Every night I hoped that he would come to see me and every night I was disappointed. I was so naïve to believe that Jacob could resist an imprint long enough to see me. No one could. A rustling in the trees nearly startled me out of my wits. I looked out of my window to see Jacob Black approaching my house, a smile on his face that was just for me and I got lost in his brown eyes. I had told myself the next time that I saw him I wouldn't talk to him, I would ignore him and forget he existed, forget that I…that I…loved him but as soon as I looked in his eyes I knew I never stood a chance. He stood there outside my window and I felt a bit like Juliet and that he was my Romeo, but even in my fantasies we were doomed. Jake leaned in and brushed his lips across mine lightly.
"Leah, I want to fight the imprint, I need you to help me," he whispered desperately and I forced myself to pull away from him. This wasn't my fairytale, he wasn't my prince and I wasn't his princess.
"I had so many dreams of you and me Jake, of happy endings, but that's all they are, dreams," I said shaking my head sadly and then I looked him in the eyes, trying not to cry as I told him, "Go back to your princess."
I had decided to leave. Seth and my mom completely supported me. They believed as I did that moving to LA would be the best thing I could do for myself. No vampires, no wolves, no Jacob, just me and the world. As much as my heart wished it wasn't so, I knew that I had to leave. When I opened my front door the day I was leaving to find Jacob Black kneeling there with a bouquet of flowers I burst into tears. He started begging me for forgiveness, begging for me, begging me to not go.
"Leah please forgive me for imprinting, I couldn't control it, please Leah please believe in me again, I love you, I always have and I know I always will, please don't go, please stay with me, I need you."
"I'm so sorry," I choked through my tears as I caressed his cheek lovingly, "But I can't risk my heart again. I'm leaving Jake, I'm going to find someone, someday, somewhere who might actually be able to completely love me, free of imprints. It's a big world out there Jake. I have to go, I have to leave you behind, and I have to forget you."
I pulled him close and pressed my lips to his for our last kiss. It was bittersweet. I pushed him away from me almost immediately and I tried to brush the tears from my eyes as I backed away from him. I slid into the front seat of my car and slammed the door after me. I knew Jake was standing there watching me but I couldn't stay. I shoved the car into gear and pulled away. My eyes drifted to my rearview mirror. Jacob Black stood there with a devastated look on his face, a limp bouquet of flowers in his hand. I drove further and further away and he was disappearing from my vision until I couldn't see him anymore. The tears started to fall as I continued to drive away and I saw a russet wolf chasing me down the road.
"It's too late for you and your white horse Jake," I whispered, heartbroken as I saw Jacob run out of steam and stop on the side of the road, watching me drive away and I tore my eyes away from him, "its too late to catch me now."
AN: So this is based on the Taylor Swift song White Horse. I have only heard the song once but I thought I might try to write a one shot. I've never written a one shot before so I thought it might be fun. I'm sorry it had to be sad, but it's the way the story ended. Let me know if you like my first foray into one shotting.