This can't be happening! I thought to myself. We're not in even married yet!
But in front of me lay three tests that scream the terrifying words of Positive. Positive. POSTIVE.
The three little tests, sitting on my bathroom sink, stare at me laughing.
These three little tests… are three tests that can change a girl's life in a matter of 15 minutes.
What will he think? Will he still love me? And the most important question of all… HOW DO I TELL HIM?
10 Ways to Tell Geoff I'm Pregnant
#1: Make him a BABY themed dinner
Great, Geoff gets home in three hours, and I still have no freaking clue how I'm going to tell him! I thought to myself as I collapsed onto our beat up, old tan futon. One of the springs dug into my back, and I sighed. Geoff really needs to let go of this stupid couch!
I lightly rubbed my hand against 'Big Bertha'. Yes, Geoff's couch is named 'Big Bertha'; he has a tendency to name inanimate objects. I rolled my eyes, remembering the time I tried to throw out Big Bertha…Geeze, did Geoff have a hissy fit.
"Bridge, you can't throw out Big Bertha, she's like family!" Geoff yelled as he grabbed an end of the couch.
I pulled on the other side of the couch, "Geoff, the couch is old, ugly, and it smells like Owen's socks!"
"Hey, Bertha has feelings to, ya know!"
"Geoff, Bertha is a COUCH!"
"And you're a HUMAN, but you don't see me trying to throw YOU out!"
I sighed deeply, "Okay, fine, you can keep your stupid couch, but guess where you're sleeping tonight?"
Geoff looked at me with wide, sparkling eyes and gasped, "You mean… I get to with Bertha tonight? It will be like a slumber party!" He moved the couch to its original spot next to coffee table and right in front of the TV. He put his arm around the back of the couch, like he was talking to a good friend. "I'm going to make us popcorn, and we're going to watch some movies. Oh, and we can invite Howard, Mingo, and Bridgette too! Babe, do you want to come? "
"To a slumber party with you, a couch, a dog, and a rubber ducky in my own living room, I think I'll pass." I said calmly. I just confined him to the couch tonight, and he's planning a slumber party! I think he was dropped on his head a little too many times as a baby.
~~End of flashback~~
I lightly shook my head, agreeing with my last thought; he was definitely dropped on his head too many times.
Whatever happened to predictability?
The milkman, the paperboy, evening TV.
I jumped at the sound of the theme music, not knowing the TV was on. This tune, it sounds so familiar…
Everywhere you look, everywhere you go (there's a heart).
There's a heart
a hand to hold onto.
Everywhere you look, everywhere you go.
There's a face
of somebody who needs you.
Everywhere you look,
when you're lost out there and you're all alone,
a light is waiting to carry you home,
everywhere you look.
Everywhere you look
Full House, I love that show! I began to sing along to the lyrics.
Man, this takes me back. Full House was my favorite show growing up; I remember 'Uncle Jesse' was my first crush. That man had it all, a great body, nice hair, and an amazing voice! My mom use to tell me that I should find a man like him. Geoff is…pretty close to the credentials, he has a great body, nice-ish hair, and based off his singing in the shower, he has an okay voice too.
Wait, focus Bridgette. I need to figure out how I'm going to tell him!
Oh what the heck, I can always tell him tomorrow.
I turned my head back to the TV, gawking at the screen when Jesse appeared, playing his guitar and singing. I soon realized that this is the episode where Becky finds out she's pregnant, one of my favorite episodes!
About ten minutes into the show, Becky started introducing Jesse to a baby themed dinner.
Then it hit me. That's how I should tell Geoff!
I turned off the TV, ran into my bedroom and grabbed my purse and shoes, and ran right out the door.
I really don't remember how the episode ended, but I'm sure it was happy. This is Full House I'm talking about; it's not like Jesse stormed off screaming, "I can't believe your pregnant, I never want to see you again!" or something like that. Every single episode always ended with a hug and a valuable lesson. What could possibly go wrong?
When I finally got to the store, I started looking around for foods with the word baby in it. I eventually found Baby carrots, baby spinach, baby back ribs, baby peas, and baby corn. I won't enjoy the ribs part, but hey, Geoff is still an animal eating monster. I'll make myself a nice baby themed salad. (1)
An hour and 15 minutes later, I finally got home. I looked at the clock and it was already 4:45. Geoff usually comes home at around 6:30, so I still have an hour and 45 minutes to prepare this little feast and get ready. I can do this!
I put the Baby back ribs in the oven, after I put some of Geoff's special barbecue sauce on them. Then I grabbed all the vegetables and started preparing them into a salad. I placed the final touch of Cesar dressing onto it, and a few pinches of blue cheese.
I decided it was time to get myself ready. I took a quick 15 minute shower, and began looking for something to wear. My closet was full of surf gear, rather than clothes, especially fancy looking clothes. But, I luckily had one dress, a little black dress.
I wore this on Geoff and I's 4 year anniversary.
Well, not for long. ;D
I dried my still soaking hair and decided to leave it down and curl it. I also applied some natural colored make up and sprayed on some good smelling perfume.
Finally, I added the last touch, a black cow boy hat Geoff bought me for Christmas last year. He loves it when I wear the hat, he finds it to be, and I quote, "babe-a-licious".
The timer on the oven went off, so ran to the kitchen to the ribs out. I couldn't help but smile, Geoff's going to love these! And I managed to make a dinner WITHOUT blowing up the kitchen, go me!
I began carefully bringing the food into the dining room, praying I wouldn't trip…I have a tendency of doing that, or so I have been told. I grabbed some red candles from around the house, and lit them for a more romantic affect.
Suddenly I heard a car roll into the drive way. Our dog, Mingo, started barking like crazy.
Yeah, the dog's name is Mingo, Geoff named him.
The door opened and my heart stopped. Geoff came walking through wearing faded blue jeans, a gray sweater vest, with a button up long-sleeved shirt, dark blue tie, and of course his oh-so-famous cowboy hat.
Geoff got his dream job, after two years in college; actually, it was about a half of year in college the one and a half spent partying. Somehow he got good enough grades to graduate. He became a party planner, a very fitting job for him I think.
"Bridgette, I'm home!"
"Bridge, where are you?"
"I'm in the dining room Geoff!"
His foot prints got closer and closer. Breathe Bridgette, breathe!
He finally entered the dining room. "Hey babe- WOW, Bridgette you look babe-a-licious!" He gasped admiring mostly my hat.
"Err, thanks… Welcome home." I said.
He finally took his eyes off my hat, and looked down towards the decorated table. He raised his eyebrow, but then his face turned to full panic mode.
"Uh, is it your birthday or something?"
"No," I said, slightly confused. "Wait, you don't know when my birthday is?"
"Of course I do babe!"
I put my hands on my hips, and started tapping my left foot. "Well?"
"Um, uh, well, it's in a month that starts with a "T" and has 30-ish days in it…"
Seriously Geoff, a month that starts with a T? What did his parents do, drop him down ten flights of stairs on his head? And we've been dating for five, almost six years now! You'd think he'd know when my freaking birthday is.
"June 8th!" I snapped.
"I knew that, I was just testing you!" Sure you were Geoff, I totally believe you. "Is it my birthday then?"
"Your birthday was three weeks ago!" I sighed, rolling my eyes. "Nothing's going on Geoff; can't I make us a nice dinner once in awhile?"
"Of course you can. So, what are we having?"
"Well, we're having BABY back ribs, BABY corn, along with a salad that consists of BABY spinach, BABY carrots, and BABY peas." I stated, emphasizing on the BABY part.
"Wow, thanks babe! Those are all my favorites!"
He immediately began stuffing the food in his mouth, not even looking at me. Oh yeah, he's REAL romantic.
"So, how was your day Geoff?" I asked hoping to strike up a conversation.
"Awesome." He yelled with food still in his mouth. "I got a job planning a bachelor party. It's a total surprise, so it's going to be super awesome, the pay checks going to be awesome too."
"That's great Geoff!' I cheered, with as much enthusiasm I could give.
"How was your day, Bridge?"
"Good, good. I went shopping and saw the cutest little baby! Don't you just love babies?"
Please say yes, please say yes! My fingers were crossed.
"Babies? Yeah, sure, uh huh." He mumbled, still stuffing his face with ribs.
Crap. I need to say something that will catch his attention. "Oh, Gwen called today, she found out she's having a baby! Isn't that great?" I lied.
He looked up at me with a confused face. "Really? I just talked to her today. She actually was the one to hire me for the bachelor party… she didn't tell me she was having a baby."
Oh, that's just great, the one time I tell a lie and-wait! Since when was Gwen getting married? She never told me that!
I looked over and saw Geoff walking away from the table with his dish in his hand, probably going to the kitchen.
"Wait! Uh, I need to tell you something!"
He turned around and sat back down on his chair. "What is it babe?"
"I'mPregnant." I said really quickly, he probably didn't hear what I said.
"Whoa, babe, you said that way too fast!"
"I'mPregnant!" I yelled with the same intensity as before.
(Haha, I still can't figure out how to write this without being confusing.)
Geoff: What? Mingo's pregnant? Go Mingo!
Bridgette: Geoff, Mingo is a GUY dog… he can't get pregnant.
Geoff: Oh, so Mingo got a girl dog pregnant? Go Mingo!
Bridgette: No! I'm pregnant!
Geoff: You're pregnant?
Bridgette: I'm pregnant.
Geoff: You're pregnant?
Bridgette: I'm pregnant.
Geoff: You're pregnant?
Bridgette: You're pregnant! Wait...
Geoff: I'm pregnant? Aaaahh!
Bridgette: No. Geoff! Me. Bridgette. I'm. Having. A. Baby!
Geoff: Oooohh… ok! That makes a whole lot more sense.
I studied Geoff's face, and I wasn't quite sure he understood that I'M pregnant. He started to walk into our room. I began to count down.
Geoff ran back into the kitchen with a panicked look on his face.
A/N: Lol, I really do enjoy making Geoff seem like an idiot. As you can see, this is just an edited version of the first chapter. I added some new stuff, but pretty much just edited some of those awful grammar and spelling mistakes. Reviews are welcomed, and if you already reviewed on this chapter, feel free to PM me, or just leave a anonymous review.
(1): Thank you KillerMay for pointing out that Bridgette's a vegetarian. Ha, and I call myself a Geoff and Bridgette fan! Shame on me!
Another chapter is currently in the works. :D