This can't be happening! I thought to myself. We're not in even married yet!
But in front of me lay three tests that scream the terrifying words of Positive. Positive. POSTIVE.
The three little tests, sitting on my bathroom sink, stare at me laughing.
These three little tests… are three tests that can change a girl's life in a matter of 15 minutes.
What will he think? Will he still love me? And the most important question of all… HOW DO I TELL HIM?
10 Ways to Tell Geoff I'm Pregnant
#3: Tell him in a firework display
Fourth of July, The day our country received Independence from Britain; The day we celebrate with BBQ's, Parades, and the most popular of them all … Fireworks. (1)
Ever since Geoff and I have been dating, we've spent our Fourth of July's watching fireworks down by the ocean. I think that's the most romantic way to spend time together, laying on a blanket, underneath the stars, on the beach, and watching breath taking fireworks.
Last year I saw the most beautiful thing during the fireworks, some guy proposed to a girl, by putting a message in a firework. That is the most romantic thing you could do! I wish Geoff would do something like that when he proposes… whenever that happens.
So that gave me the idea of how to tell Geoff I'm pregnant, doing exactly that.
Have you ever had to go pee so bad that you had to cross your legs ever so tightly that it begins to cut off the circulation in your legs?
Have you ever had to stop yourself from thinking about water or anything close to it, just to keep it in?
Have you ever had those times where you're trying so damn hard not to think about water, but coincidently the channel on the TV shows a river flowing or the faucet in the kitchen is leaking ever so loudly?
If you have, you must know the pain and agony I'm going through right now.
Ever since Geoff and I started living together, I've learned he has a habit of being in the bathroom for more than two hours. What kind of guy takes two hours just to take a shower and get dressed? It only takes me 10 minutes to get in and out of the shower and another 10 to get dressed and do my hair and make-up.
I have no idea what Geoff does in there. Occasionally I hear him singing a horrible impression of Don't Stop Believing by Journey and other times I hear him talking to his rubber ducky, Howard. It's pretty amusing hearing a grown man talk to a rubber ducky, insanely weird… yet hilarious.
The sudden urge to go the bathroom snapped back into my stomach and I crossed my legs even tighter. "Geoff, if you don't come out of there in three seconds, I'm going to shove your lucky cowboy hat down the garbage disposal!" I yelled. Hell, I wasn't kidding either.
Suddenly, the bathroom door opened and a fully-dressed Geoff came running out. "No! Not my lucky hat!"
I quickly ran into the bathroom and put up the toilet seat not bothering to close the door. And there I saw Geoff's Rubber Ducky floating in the toilet.
I don't even want to know, I thought to myself as I grabbed the duck and ran out the door. I saw Geoff standing by our bedroom door putting on his hat; I quickly chucked the duck at his head and ran back into the bathroom.
~Two Minutes Later~
I walked out of the bathroom feeling fully relieved… As I turned the corner I saw Geoff hugging Howard.
"It's okay Howard; I won't let that big meanie hurt you ever again." He cooed as if he were talking to a baby. Hm, maybe if I tell Geoff I'm giving birth to a duck, he'll take the news better.
I rolled my eyes, "Okay Geoff, you seriously need to stop taking two hour showers, or you need to build me another bathroom!"
"Sorry babe, it takes a while to make my hair look this good." He said giving me a smirk.
I rolled my eyes again, "Geoff, you're wearing a hat, no one can see your hair."
I took a second to look at the clock, and it was almost 3:00 pm. "Geoff we have to go! Your parents want us to be there by 3:30, and it takes an hour to get to their house." I said as I grabbed Geoff's hand and lead him out the door to the car.
Fourth of July is also the day Geoff's parents throw a huge party. They invite their enormous extended family along with, like, one hundred of their closest friends.
I always thought Geoff was the ultimate partier, that is, until I met his four older brothers. When you get the five of them together, it turns into endless chaos. And it's not just them, their parents, their uncles, their aunts, their cousins, heck, even their 80- year-old grandparents like to party!
I snapped back into reality and looked at the road. Next to us was an old couple driving, and before I knew it they passed us. The old man flashed us 'the finger'. I looked over at the speedometer and saw were only going 35mph on a 60 mph road.
"Geoff, why are you driving so slowly? My great grandma could drive faster than you and she's 97!"
"Slow and steady wins the race, Bridge." He said in an insightful voice.
"We're in a car Geoff, not a children's fairytale."
"I believe the correct term is 'fable'."
Did that seriously come out of the mouth of a man who thinks the dog named Beethoven is the one who wrote all those classical phenomenons? "Geoff, what are you on?"
He took a second to think, "I'm on the car seat, duh. Are you feeling okay Bridgette?"
Sometimes I really wonder what I ever saw in this man.
I turned my head to Geoff; both his hands were tightly secured on the steering wheel. His blue eyes were intensely focused on the road in front of him. His body was tense and aware. Funny how I always thought Geoff would be one of those wild man drivers that would have the radio blasting, driving way too fast, and all the windows opened, with only one hand on the steering wheel. He's the exact opposite. Even if I try to open a window, Geoff yells at me and says, "Bridgette, you'll let the bugs in!"
He's seriously a prick when it comes to his car, or should I say, "Larry".
Maybe that's what I saw in him; the way he always does the unexpected. Life is like a guessing game with Geoff, and trust me; it makes my life a whole lot more interesting.
I looked out the window, and admired the ocean, wishing I could be surfing those waves right now. The faint sound of rock music arose to my ears, we must be getting close. Soon enough the car stopped in front of a large beach house and six figures with cowboy hats came running out of the house.
Geoff put the car in park, and went running out the door. "Mom, Dad, Jet, Jude, Johnny, Jason!"
I watched as his dad and brothers picked him off the ground, carrying him into the back of the yard.
"Bridgette!" Geoff's mom called as she approached the car. "It's so good to see you, dear!"
"It's good to see you too, Mrs. Ryder." I said, as she pulled me into a hug.
"Bridgette, call me Jen. You know how I feel about formalities."
It's true, that woman didn't have a formal bone in her body. The first time I met her, she started a burping contest at this fancy restaurant. We soon got kicked out. Note to self: NEVER invite Geoff's mom, or anyone else in his family for that matter, to a fancy restaurant.
"Oh Bridge, I'm so happy I'm going be a grandma again!"
Wait, what? How did she know I was pregnant! "Um, how do you know I'm pregnant?"
"Your eyes are sparkling, your face is glowing, and your smile shines of pregnancy."
"You can tell I'm pregnant… just because of my face?"
She giggled. "Of course not Bridgette, that's just an old wives tale! Your mom told me."
"My mom is here?" I asked, surprised. She didn't tell me she was coming…
"Yeah, she's in the kitchen helping me cook lunch. You should go say hi to her." She said, as she headed out to back yard.
"Wait, aren't you helping her—" I looked at Jen, as she waved, walking to the back yard. Like mother, like son.
I sighed, and started walking up the long driveway, admiring the large, beautiful beach house and its landscape. Geoff's mom is a lawn designer, meaning she designs landscapes that go around people houses. She gets paid big bucks and she's amazing at what she does.
I approached the large oak door that Geoff's dad crafted from scratch and he'll never let you forget that he did. Every single time I come over, his dad tells me the long story of how his great-great-grandfather planted that very oak tree, passing it on generation to generation. And when he got the tree, it mysteriously died, so he used its wood to build this door and the wood flooring in the house.
I opened the door, with every ounce of my strength I might add, and walked into a large, open room that had high ceilings and large windows that brought it loads of light.
"Hi mom," I said, walking toward the enormous kitchen. "You didn't tell me you were coming."
"Well, you know me, I love to surprise people." She explained, "Oh, and just to let you know, I took care of everything."
"What do you mean everything?"
"You know… the firework display."
"You made a firework display?" I asked, totally shocked. Who knew my mom was that talented?
She looked at me and laughed, "No Bridgette, Todd did."
"Todd….as in Geoff's dad, Todd?"
"Yup, "she said with a smile.
"So your saying Geoff's dad, Todd, made the firework display that's going to say that I'm pregnant?"
Who the hell gave Geoff's dad gun powder? I mean, I love the guy like he was my own father, who ever that is, but he isn't the smartest tool in the tool shed. That's where Geoff got his brains from. And god knows I would never let Geoff even do as much as think about gun powder or anything that explodes.
"Is something wrong Bridgette?"
"Um, no, well… yes. I already called the people in charge of the ocean fireworks and asked them to make the display. And I was kind of hoping Geoff and I could do this, you know, alone, on the beach, under the moonlight."
"Bridge, Geoff's dad is in charge of the ocean fireworks." She explained, looking confused at my gawking face. "You do know he is a professional fireworks display maker, right?"
"Um, no, I didn't." I guess you learn something new every day.
"And as for being alone, on the beach, under the moonlight… Geoff's parents live on the beach; you guys can go down there and watch the fireworks. I promise no one will bother you two."
"Thanks mom." I said, hugging her.
"You're welcome Bridgette. Why don't you go outside and enjoy yourself, while I try to figure out how to turn on this stove."
"Uh, mom, that's the dishwasher." (2)
"Well, that explains why the turkey smells lemon fresh." She mused to herself. "If you see Jen out there, send her back in okay?"
"Will do mom, will do." I said as I walked out towards the backyard.
Let's just say… my mom isn't the best cook. She's part of the reason why I went vegetarian.
When I reached the backyard, my mouth fell wide open. I found myself staring at a big in ground pool, a trampoline; five of those blow-up bounce houses, a mini skate park, a small stage, and at least 100 people.
"Look Bridge, no hands!" I looked out toward Geoff, who was skating in the mini skate park.
I rolled my eyes, as I sat down on one of the patio chairs.
"It's a lot to take in, isn't it?"
I jumped at the sound of the unknown voice. I looked to the right and saw the smiling face of Keri, the only sane person in the Ryder family. She's married to one of Geoff's brothers, Johnny I think, or is it Jason?
"Hey Keri, I didn't see you there."
She gave a short giggle. "Yeah, that's the point. I'm not fit for this whole party-crazy lifestyle."
"I know how you feel."
"That and Jude wanted me to sing karaoke with him on the stage. I ran away from him, so he's singing with grandma now."
I looked out toward the small stage and I saw Jude and grandma dancing, singing I Got You Babe by Sonny and Cher.
I glanced over at Keri, who shaking her head and laughing. I couldn't help but join her.
"Grandma wanted to sing Like a Virgin, but Jude told her he didn't have the song. Oh, how I love this family!" Keri paused and gave a short sigh. "I only hope our kids won't turn out as crazy as him and his brothers."
Oh yeah, she's married to Jude—wait, did she just say kids! I looked over at Keri, surprised by her bulging stomach.
"Keri, you're pregnant!" I exclaimed.
"Yup, 4-months tomorrow, we're having twins." She gave me a slight smile. "You're pregnant too I see."
"Did my mom tell you?" I asked. Geez, did my mom tell everyone! By the time I tell Geoff, he'll already know I'm pregnant.
"No. I can tell by how your face lit up when you saw my stomach. I call it, 'the gleam of an expecting mother'. Congratulations!"
"Thanks Keri, but I still haven't told Geoff."
"I know how you feel, I was so afraid to tell Jude when I found out."
"How did you tell Jude?" I asked. Maybe she can give me some advice…
"Oh, it wasn't hard. I did it by—Aaah, Jude!" She screamed as Jude took her hand, taking her right out of the chair.
Jude gave me a quick wink and then grinned victoriously at Keri. "I finally found you! Come on Ker, it's our turn to sing!"
"Noooo! Bridgette, help me!" Keri screamed, as Jude dragged her away.
"Sorry Keri, I can't hear you!" I laughed, watching Keri give me the death glare.
I watched as Jude forced Keri onto the stage, still glaring at me. He gave her the microphone and she was shaking, mumbling something to Judd… Probably along the lines of: I'm going to kill you while you're sleeping tonight or I'm going to shave off all your blonde luscious hair… as your sleeping tonight.
"Oh, how I love this family." I laughed, repeating Keri's words.
~Four Hours Later~
"Isn't the sky just beautiful tonight, Geoff?
He looked down into my eyes, "Not compared to the hot babe that's lying on my chest."
If you take out the 'hot babe' part, that almost sounded romantic. I smiled and gave Geoff quick peck on the lips. "Thanks Geoff."
"Did I say hot babe? I meant, uh, totally delicious-sexy-hot-lady-babe that's lying on my chest!"
I rolled my eyes, as I leaned up and gave him a longer, more passionate kiss.
Keep this up Bridgette and you'll have twins.
"Did I say totally-de—"
"Shut up Geoff."
I lay back down on his chest, smiling, when the fireworks started.
"Look Bridge, that one looks like a spider!" Geoff screamed enthusiastically like a little kid.
I nodded, watching Geoff's amazed face as he watched the different fireworks. Anytime now, my personalized firework would go off.
About five minutes went by and various types of fireworks went off, most of which looked like spiders. Geoff had to say that every time a 'spider firework' went off.
He may be a major blonde, a prick when it comes to cars, and a fan-boy when it comes to little rubber duckies, but that's what makes me love him.
A couple more fireworks went off, as I still stared at Geoff's face, until I heard some 'awhs' and 'that's so cute' enter my ears.
This is it Bridgette, the moment I've been waiting all day for. I took a deep breath and looked into Geoff's eyes.
"Look Bridgette, some dude named Geoff is pregnant!"
"Yeah Geoff, I'm p—wait what?"
I looked up at the sky, staring at the words:
GEOFF, I'S PREGNANT.
A/N: Haha, uh, hey guys! -Sees an angry mob of reviewers with pitchforks and rabid squirrels- Yeahh... I know, I'm the world's most terrible updater... I'm really sorry for the year and month delay of the third chapter... but It's finally here. This is a REALLY, REALLY, REALLY late Fourth of July present to you guys... and I say REALLY late because this was meant for last year. XD
Sorry if this chapter was boring...
This chapter is dedicated to: KillerMay! Thank you for the idea and I'm sorry for the BIIIIIIGGGG freaking delay.
(1): Yeah, I know... TDI takes place in Canada and all 22 contestants came from Canada too. Pretend Bridgette and Geoff live in California okay? For me?
(2): Lol, my sister and I went to my Aunt's house and she's rediculously rich aand had this weird looking dishwasher that looked EXACTLY like stove.. , Aaaand being the smart blondes that we totally are, we tried to cook some chicken in it. Can you guess the out come?
Review please. :)