I don't know what came into my mind… I still published it though. Major failure.

Gakuen Alice© is NOT mine. It belongs to Tachibana Higuchi.

THIS IS YAOI. SHOUNEN-AI AND THE LIKES (Yes, I know what's the difference between yaoi, shounen-ai, and gay love). [Natsume x Ruka] [Ruka x Everyone] This is very disturbing, so hit the BACK button if necessary. But if you really want some shounen-ai fluff, you have to read it from the start (otherwise, you wouldn't understand). And if it gets boring to your taste, THEN WTH ARE YOU DOING HERE? Get out.

DON'T LIKE? DON'T READ!


Sayonara, Ru-chan.


NORTHERN FOREST ††† 2:29 a.m.

Ruka woke up to the sound of rustling leaves. "Mmmrhg." He opened an eye, and there was Natsume; carrying him through a thick forest. "N…atsume?" he whispered, and he earned a glance from the boy with cat mask; as if to say 'Yes?' The night wind's cold and everything's dark under the shade of these trees. Ruka can just feel the hopping knees of his best friend under his back. They moved swiftly as it can be. No noises. No unsteady movement. "I'm…? I'm dreaming…? This… is a dream? Natsume?" he asked in a low voice. The cat-masked boy gave a nod, and it made Ruka crawl back to his sleep. Sleep. Eyes began to close, while his loose grip on the back of Natsume's shirt started to feel completely detached.

Ruka trusts Natsume in every part of his life. And the latter knew that very well.

Ruka snuggled into Natsume's chest. Because Ruka felt secure in his arms. But this time, that will change. "Forgive me." said Natsume as he looks down at this sleeping angel. His blond hair that glows in white can never be tousled ever again. His beautiful sapphire eyes that look on everybody with kindness can never look at him the same way again. Forgive me, Ruka.


NORTHERN FOREST (Hidden Cabin) ††† 2:41 a.m.

"You're to watch?"

"I'm just here to make sure that you won't hurt him."

"Wouldn't that be painful for the both of you?"

"…Whatever."


NORTHERN FOREST (Hidden Cabin) ††† 2:50 a.m.

The blond tossed for a more comfortable position on the mattress, yet it made him much more uncomfortable after. He woke up, eyes meeting a white ceiling. He stirred a little as he tried to get back to slumber. Yet, somehow, his arms don't seem to comply with his wishes, and thus, he stumbles fully awake with his eyes shot open. Wait. This isn't my room. He tried sitting up with utmost curiosity, but his arms were held back. That's when he noticed the chains on his wrists, linked to the wall. This is a nightmare? Ruka tries to break free from it, and felt it sting when the sharp edge hit his flesh. No, it's not. He went confused. Was he falling into a prank? Was he kidnapped? Was he put into jail (poor Ruka, you're only 16)? But he's still in his pyjamas; this couldn't be an arrest, correct?

Tapping sounds reverberated through. He searched for the door against a dim-lit room, and before he could, the said door opens to his right. Persona. He looks straight at his bare face (meaning, without his white mask).

A pause. Ruka scowled at him, "Where's Natsume?" he spat even though his energy is still jump-starting. Persona smirked with that twisted lips of his. Ruka's blood boils. The teacher stepped aside into the room, Natsume came into view. "N-natsume!"

So, it wasn't a dream after all.

Natsume closed the door behind him, and sat somewhere across the room. He said nothing under that cat mask, "W-wait! Natsume! What's happening?!" The room went really dark. The air's still and quiet. "I don't understand any of this! Release me!"

Persona took his coat off, exposing a lean and pale chest, "Shall we start?" he asked, again with the most twisted smile ever, that it would put Satan in shame. Ruka gasped, crawling away with the help of his feet. In the background, Natsume sighs. Forgive me.

Ruka starts to cry, terrified under this teacher's gaze, weak in these chains, and betrayed by his best friend. "Natsume." He called, and was only ignored. Persona crawls in bed, slowly, as if to mock; then leaned over the blonde's face, giving a lick on his cheek. Ruka pushed him off, "Natsume! Take me out of here!" And then, another lick… disgusting kiss on his jaw. "It's useless, Nogi-san." This man whispered; sending Ruka trembling against Natsume's indifferent stare. Was it really useless, Natsume? Ruka cries, tears blurring his sight, somehow surrendering in this situation, somehow losing to the current event. Persona took his cue, smirking to this boy's features.

He unbuttoned Ruka's nightwear, kissing down as he did, while Ruka just closed his eyes and bit his own lips. Those fingers that traced every inch of his flesh were the ones who killed people, the ones who give Natsume a living nightmare, and the ones who would probably kill him too. What can Ruka do?

Persona isn't a patient monster. I'll lose something, Natsume. Are you happy with that? He pushed down the boy's pyjamas along with his underwear 'til it slid off of him. Persona paused for a moment. And he smirks again, "I can totally see why Natsume-kun chose Nogi-san… as his best friend."

The torture begins for Ruka, hurting much more knowing that Natsume is just right there, not moving despite what he's seeing. His hands gripped on the chains, even though the cuffs seem to stretch away his hands from his arms. Help me, Natsume. Ruka gasped at the cold contact, he never thought of someone touching him down there. It's too much. Persona began putting pressure teasingly, making Ruka kick his face away, but the dirty hand stayed. The teacher leaned again, this time on the boy's chest; kissing every inch of it, and he started to pump his hand too, forcibly. This is too much, "Gah! P-please! Stop t-this!" He screamed. "The odds are high, Ruka-kun."

Biting back his sobs, Ruka balled his fists and clenched his teeth. "Aaah…!" he murmurs when he reached his limit. "Felt that? That's just an appetizer." And that voice just scares the queen of the underworld. Persona took his time to stare at his fingers, as if a child fascinated by that white thing. Those eyes travelled Ruka's body (and that's just sick).

Ruka bit at his tongue this time, when Persona inserted a finger in him, pushing up and down then side to side. The other hand traced his features, somehow looking like a vase under a critical inspection. "Ah. So smooth, so young, pure and untouched." He whispered, getting greedy by the second. "Virginal."

More tears strolled on his cheeks. He inserted another finger, and at that moment, it hurts. "Makes me wonder," He pushed in the third one. Ruka hissed in absolute pain.

"of how many times had that Narumi undressed you at the back of his mind," In and out, was it?

"of how many times had Serina-sensei watched you through her mystic ball whenever you're in the bathroom," In and out, it went. "S-shut up! Ahhh!" spat Ruka, not wanting to hear that voice again.

"of how many times had Jinno wanted to strike you with his lightning so he'd see this naked glory (really?)," And Natsume went to find his voice, "You talk too much."

"of how many times Kuro Neko snooped into your room through your window at night or while you sleep just to caress you in different places," Oh god, that went straight in.

"and of how many times your friends thought and wished that you're a she so they can start something different in their minds. Those made me just wonder." The fingers dashed out of the boy to set it flat on Persona's black trousers, and those trousers turned into dust… just like that. Monster has it, but Ruka took no chance to open his eyes.

Persona cradled him, put a steady hold onto Ruka's hips, and pushed his member in with only one merciless move. A marvel how it swallowed everything. "So tight too." He remarked, yet again. "G… aaah! S-stop! P-please!"

And the itsy bitchy spider climbed up the spout again.

Secretly, Natsume's tears walked slowly down his face like a stream, then meeting at the end of his chin. He suppressed his gasps. Those simple tears seemingly wanting to have an innocent walk went straight in a hurried manner. Under that cat mask, Natsume's eyes began to change its colour. He crossed his arms and dug his fingers deep into his palms, then firmed his jaw.

"And it was me who will be the one to break you. Oh, lucky me."

Natsume.

Please.


Middle School Dormitory ††† 2:00 p.m.

Ruka woke up his own consciousness. Was it still dark? He didn't know. Is he still chained? He must know. Is that face still there? He wouldn't even take the risk to know. The smell of grapes filled his nose, and that was, actually, the only thing that built his mind awake. He couldn't feel his muscles, he couldn't move them; maybe, because he's too sore that he can only feel really numb. His eyes stayed shut, what will he see if it had opened? How could he face the world with these stains? He cries, sobs filled his ears and tears drenched his pillow.

Usagi ran up to his face, pressing its small cheek on Ruka's nose; in which, of course, made Ruka shoot his eyes open at the poor little thing. It stared at him for a while, while he completely got that gaping mouth. Fear? Why, yes. It took Ruka eight seconds to get into the bathroom, leaving the white little bunny on his bed. Everything hurts, and it felt impossible to walk. The bunny just flopped itself, maybe wondering what just happened in his dreams.

Ruka is still completely clothed. Glaring at himself at his bathroom mirror, he took his clothes off of him; feeling the disgust. The shower ran cold and painful, but if it wasn't for the water that ran out of it, he must've been on fire now because of the sponge that moves violently all over his body. Stupid! It slipped out of his tight grasp. Just like everything now? He banged his head on the tiled wall opposite of him, and oh god it's never repeated (I know I shouldn't have written that).


It went as a trauma. He got a fever on that same day, and for more days, he doesn't want to get up from his bed. His faithful animal friends helped him get through the whole week. To help him sleep? A pack of wolves guards him at night. To help him eat? A bunch of squirrels gathered so much, though he refused the food from Piyo. To help him think? Usagi's there to bite his earlobe once in a while (Aww. XD). In went great, but he was earning absences from class and visits from classmates. It's insane. Classmates were no good to him; they're imagining bad things, right? Thinking that he's a girl, just because his mother named him that way; just because he's manliness is overshadowed(wait, this could mean a lot of things) by Natsume. But Natsume, be careful. The secret's hidden just among the three of them. Nothing was leaked.

By the end of the second week, they talked. Maybe, they shouldn't have, but they did. It's Natsume's turn to be with the wolves that night, Ruka sure felt relief that he's not in another mission again, but Ruka doesn't want to trust Natsume, not now. "How are you?" Natsume asked, folding some towels. The blond didn't answer, what's he's suppose to say? 'Don't touch me?', 'Get out of my sight?'

"I'm sorry that I have to hand you to them."

And at that moment, Ruka felt himself wanting to forgive Natsume, but this is just all wrong. It went straight off the cliff. Two bunny arms landed on Ruka's forehead, "I agreed on a deal; they'll take her if I wouldn't—"

But you were there! You didn't do anything! Because she was on the line?! Because she's much more important than I am to you?! Not fair!

Ruka sighs, "Y-you don't have t-to explain. I understand." Yet sometimes, he doesn't want to understand. He doesn't want to know the reasons. "I'm really… sorry." Ruka, being a pushover that he is, gave Natsume everything that he has, in exchange of what?

You gave me up, Natsume.

"Natsume," he called. "T-these circumstances… I… I think," And he looks down on his lap, bitterly remembering how that man broke him. "I t-think it's best that I… g-give you up too." Then the bunny hopped off his head and fell cooingly on one of his thighs. "I… give up being your best friend."

A moment of silence for the both of them fell. "Do you get it, Natsume?"

That every time I see your face (or even your shadow), I remember h-how you had… h-how it had… how this had happened? You see, I'm sorry but… I can't look at you as my friend anymore.

Natsume shook his head; this isn't what it's supposed to be. And he lost the thinning thread too, "Did you think that it was easy for me to watch you being… treated like that?" he just had to say that.

"Natsum—"

"Don't worry. I'll… I'll stay away as far as I could." Said Natsume, opening the door, exiting, then closed it shut. This half-French student wasn't really expecting that answer. Usagi looked at him attentively, then climbed up to perch on his shoulder; "Thanks."


Sayonara, Ru-chan. »

Konnichiwa, Natsume. »

Half a year, was it? It's been very long.

Natsume limped himself back to his room, a hand on his other arm; probably, wanting to stop the bleeding of another wound. He hissed in pain as he reached for his doorknob. Damn. Everything's getting harder for Natsume, but would that matter to anyone? He laid his head flat on his bed; he can take care of this wound tomorrow, and this night would be filled with sleep. He's been neglected, apparently. "Natsume."

A voice wakes him. That lush voice, that wonderful way of how his name effortlessly slips from his tongue was it? He turned his head to his right, "Is this a dream?" he asked, almost bluntly as not to sound a lot more stupid than he already is. Ruka stood there with his arms crossed across his chest, making a sour face. "Uh. Yes…?"

"Oh. I thought you were real." He said, his own voice beginning to falter. It saddens him. Desperate for those hands to give him a little pat, fool. Wishing for him to knock on his door then say that 'it's school time', idiot. Ruka stepped closer, Usagi sniffing around his yellow locks. "I thought I already told you to always have bandages on your bedside table." Natsume chuckles a little; maybe, he already had memorized everything about Ruka, or was it just he missed him so much that he's going mental? Whatever the reason, Ruka just won't leave his mind. "Ah!" There was a pat on his wound, it was light but it stings!

Natsume composed himself. Okay, that hurts. Ruka just giggled to himself, the bunny on top of him just slid down his face, it had leaned a little bit too much (maybe, wanting to see those sky eyes) and is now clinging onto Ruka's arm. Sometimes, he wonders how Natsume got that cool and genius image, when right here; he's acting less. "Fooled by your own trick now, ne?" Ruka teased, sitting just beside him on the bed. "So, how are you doing?" asked Natsume, removing his black jacket, and still half-believing that this could just be a dream. Usagi jumped off his lap and went straight to the bathroom. Oh, Natsume likes it when Ruka just let his bunny go somewhere else. It's like feeling unrestrained, and not troubled. "I'm doing well. And I can see that you're not." He said as he gave that smile.

Natsume stayed quiet. "It's alright, Natsume." And Usagi came back onto his lap with a roll of bandage and some other stuff in a pouch. "It… It doesn't matter anymore." Ruka tends Natsume's wounds with a smile, he missed aiding Natsume. "But it does matter."

Ruka just sighs, "I realized that it was Natsume who suffered the most. It was Natsume who caught the pain twice as much." He got some cotton balls and some liquids, and that little rabbit made itself a nurse that helped Ruka to tend Natsume's wounds. "I'm sorry, I was being selfish. I wasn't open-minded enough to see that not talking to you would cause more burdens." A dab, Natsume suppressed a hiss.

"And so, I decided that, even if I lost most of what I have, I will still support Natsume with what is left, I will continue nursing his wounds, continue making Natsume smile, and still be a friend," Another dab, careful absorbent dab. "That is, if the position for being the best friend is already taken." Ruka took the bandage and unrolled it, but a bandage? Ruka doesn't think that a bandage would really help. He shook his head over Usagi, who just twitched his nose.

"Ruka," Natsume called, smiling a little to Ruka's way, "You know it very well that it's always reserved for you." Ruka grinned as he took out a clean patch. He filled his mouth with air for a second, then released it. That grin thinned, "I don't think I can be the same again, not with these scars, but even so, I'll try my best to be what I'm used to be."

Because I care for Natsume much more than I care for myself.

Ruka eased the patch on Natsume's skin. Then he pets his white bunny. Natsume placed a hand on his patched wound, muttering a 'thanks'.

"But this is my fault, I agree—"

"Because you knew that I can understand everything, right?"

Konnichiwa, Natsume.


(Ending Spoof? Uh. Let's see.)

"I just want to ask you one thing though. It's been bugging me the whole time since!" Ruka asked, blushing slightly at the epiphany .

"Hm?" And Natsume had innocently asked.

"Is it true that… you know; what that pedophile said?"

"W-what?"

"Is it true that… you were sneaking into my room at night just to… you know, to 'caress in different places'?"

A pause. "Ah… Well…"


Grr. I'm lost. Please help me rebuild this thing. It's the worst thing that ever came into my mind. I woke up in the morning typing this, and it turned out that a long-shot isn't easy to make in just one day.

Sorry if I had offended some when I inserted a bunch of reactions into a dark fic (pfft. As if it's one). I can't help myself! Garbage. This is garbage. FIST OFF CRAB. Piroriparopirirora. This sucks.