Tekel

John 14:15, John 21:15-17

Disclaimer: Narnia and its world, citizens, allies, and enemies are the property of C.S. Lewis, Walden Media, and Disney.


I knew I dreamt, for the colors were unlike those I saw when waking. The world was strange, vivid, and the shapes of trees and greening things mixed together as though painted with colored water. It was late spring, and the flowers were just dressing for summer. Walking beside me was a friend. I knew him, but his voice was unfamiliar to me. I could not tell if he was man or beast. I wished to turn to see his face, and I could not. It was as if I was imprisoned in another man's body. I could only listen and walk with him under a foreign sky.

"We have been good to one another all the time I have known you. Dear friend, allow me to ask you this. You needn't answer me outright; only think your answer in your heart." My friend slowed his pace and I with him, his voice rich and trembling with urgency. "This has not happened in all the history of the world, and unless I miss my judgment it shall not happen until the world ends. I cannot, however, rid my mind of this thought, so I unburden myself to you. If, then, only if—ten thousand and ten thousand more men and beasts and other creatures crowded a great field, a field so great that it stretched beyond sight, and the Lion walked among them great as the sun, but with his glory hidden so that he seemed to be as any other beast—would you know him?"

I paused, and it seemed to me that even if I could look on my friend's face at that moment I would not. His question hung between us and I could not answer. I searched the corners of my heart for an answer, but all I found was of no substance. Although I both knew and did not know the friend at my side, his question demanded an answer from me with as much power as if I had known him all my life. If the Lion walked among us…. A desire came alive in my spirit like a flame on a moonless night. If the Lion were hidden among tens of thousands of others, I wished that I would know him. I wished that I would know the sweet terror of his voice whispered through the roar of the world.

My friend turned to me, his urgency tempered with his assurance. "I would know him by the tugging of my heart towards his. I could find him among tens of hundreds of thousands times tens of hundreds of thousands, because his presence would draw me to himself." My eyes took in the shape of a flower's petals at my feet. The world around me began to fade. "Though I have never seen his face, I would know him because his nature would cry out to mine. My heart would know the whisper of his voice." The silence of my own bedchamber began to creep into my mind; the waking world drew me out from my sleep. "I would know him by the tugging of my heart towards his." My eyes opened with the taste of the dream heavy in my mouth, my heart still burning. I kept still on my bed, gathering what understanding I could from the unfamiliar voice of a friend that still sounded in my ears. "The tugging of my heart towards his."

"Oh, Aslan. Teach me more of thy nature, and let me be known by thee." The thought of his glory and grace grew heavy in my mind. "Let me be guided by thy will. Let my feet tread the marks of thy paws. Let my heart be drawn to thine, my liege, my King, healer of dark hearts and source of the breath of life. Breathe thy life and courage into my stone, and exchange true flesh for my hardened spirit. Forgive me, Aslan. I know of thee but I do not walk along side thee and learn from thee. Be my true liege lord and let me be thy servant. Let my heart learn thine so that I know thee in any land, among any people. "