by: jules713

James mulls over the color green as he passes from the world.

James Potter was drifting. He couldn't remember what had happened five minutes ago. Hell, he couldn't remember his own parents' names. There was a burning near his heart and everything was as black as a cloudless night. James couldn't string two coherent thoughts together. All he could think about was the color green.

Green were the grass-covered rolling hills near Hogwarts; so bright and crisp. The trees shined in their green glory, giving off an air of freshness that nobody could resist. James could remember his favorite tree, the one by the lake that was right in the middle of everything. Green was the color of the brush that grew wildly and the stems and leaves of the intricate flowers near the Forbidden Forest.

James thought of the deep green of the frogs in Transfiguration. He remembered being the first to transfigure his once, how wide his grin had become when he felt superior to the smartest in the class. He got 10 points for his house that day. It had left him feeling light hearted the rest of the day; it had felt good to receive points rather than lose them. James thought of Herbology, with its dense vegetation that contained every green James could imagine. He remembered being a first year, slightly awed by the hundreds of plants kept in storage there.

He had hexed Snape's greasy hair green once. And Aubrey Bertram was once turned that color by Sirius, who hated Bertram for simply breathing.

James could think of an evil green. The lights is the sky in the shape of the Dark Mark, hanging over his childhood home and over Lily's parent's home. The tears that fell from his eyes and hers were not only ones of sadness and grief, but also ones of anger and revenge. Their tears had glowed green, bathed in that horrible light. After that, both James and Lily had sought out the Order of the Phoenix and demanded to join.

Being in the Order felt great, like James was making a difference for standing up in something he believed so strongly in. With Lily by his side, he felt invulnerable. There were days where he didn't sleep. Instead, he watched homes, plotted raids on suspected Death Eater's homes and pushed himself-too much, as Lily told him.


Lily's eyes were green; a bright emerald that shined in happiness and flashed in anger. Lily's eyes had an intensity like no other. He thought of all his memories with her as they came flooding back. The curses, the jinxes, the hexes, the slaps in the face that he received weekly. Then came the best memories. His first kiss with her that had led to many dates, a proposal, a wedding, the birth of a beautiful baby boy with James' messy hair and his beautiful wife's green eyes. The best memory projected on James' eyelids, illuminating the darkness. James smiled softly as the image of Lily sleeping with Harry next to her popped into his mind. He fought hard to keep it there just a tiny bit longer. But it faded, leaving as quickly as it had come. He caught more and more glimpses; all of it went by so fast that it blurred around the edges until he couldn't see anything.

Green were the eyes he looked into every night as he laid his son Harry to sleep. Harry, with his unruly black hair and shining smile, the picture of everything innocent and good. Harry was such a sweet child, James mused, so well behaved. He had the biggest, brightest smile. James could come home fuming mad and enraged and one look from that little boy could send every mean thought right out of his head. Harry consumed James in happiness, in goodness. Harry was the reason they went into hiding, the reason Lily and James had given up their social lives and jobs-to protect the one thing that meant the most to both of them.

Hiding, becoming a secret, was beyond dull. There were days when James, Lily and Harry had just relaxed in bed the whole day. Under the green covers and basking in the warm happiness, James could sometimes forget why they were hiding. Sometimes, it was all he thought about. Looking down at Harry as he slept, Lily and James would fret and mumble to each other, scared of what's to come, afraid of where they'd end up.

But it was worth it.

Everything was worth it for Harry.

Harry loved when his father made puffs of smoke appear from his wand. James remembered the last puff that he made before Lily brought him to bed was an eerie neon green which made Harry clap in delight.

Lily. Harry. James felt a tear run down his cheek as he stared into the unknown. He turned away from the images in his mind, groping in the darkness for a sense of something real. The burning in his chest finally erupted, for at last, he remembered the most horrible, dreadful green in the world.

The light from the horrible curse by which he died, protecting the ones he loved.