A/N: Alternate title for chapter 1: Choosing Love

Unwavering Love and the Unknown

I have broken down many times before, but

Somehow this time feels worse than the past.

Unspoken droplets of sorrow have made their way below my small face.

My eyes are shut.

I'm feeling grief.

This could be the end.

And everyday might be closer to my last,

Death represents many meanings,

Brings fear, regret, and prepared acceptance in its wake.

Oh, baby, please try harder to understand what I want, what I need.

Marrying you has been our dream since we swore there would never be anyone but us.

I know you're afraid and lashing out to conceal your pain.

You're in denial at the implications,

And do not even want to think about my death, of things going wrong.

But if I die, I want to have the title of Peyton Scott before I go.

Just be here with me, support like you always have.

True Love Always.

That's what we're supposed to have.

We're going to make it,

And if we're not, I'd like to think we would be together again someday.

I want that with all my heart.

A/N: I have many notes and the transition of different feelings about this poem. Tell me what you think. This is how the original poem went. I'm honestly debating on making some changes on the ending, taking a few words out here and there and replacing it with new, better lines. Definitely used some past Peyton lines, and LP references in this one. I'm sure it shows. I made the whole piece informal with contractions because I know everyday people and Peyton uses them frequently. I can imagine Hilarie Burton as Peyton saying and thinking of this so here's the (hopefully) final product. Don't be surprised if I edit like crazy. I tend to catch mistakes I haven't caught before. Enjoy!