I do not now, nor have I ever owned Naruto.


Naruto fought the urge to fidget as he and Ino found themselves seated in an office he'd visited many times over the years. Only instead of the familiar, comforting form of the grandfatherly Sandaime Hokage smiling back at him across the desk, it was the frowning, imposing form of the legendary Yondaime Hokage, a man he'd just found out was his father.

"Now, why exactly do you want to see my wife?" Minato asked, looking from Naruto to Ino and back again.

"We... we just wanted to talk to her, that's all." Ino replied, giving a rather nervous smile and, in Naruto's opinion, looking rather obviously suspicious.

"OK, and what was it you needed to talk to her about?" was his next question, and Ino replied "Just... just have something important to tell her, nothing more."

"And what is this important information you have for her?" Minato questioned, to which Ino gulped and murmured "You-you wouldn't believe us if we told you..."

"Try me." Minato said, and Naruto gave a frustrated grunt as he replied "Her life and this world is fake! You're fake, this world's 'Naruto' is fake, Teuchi's fake! Everything's fake fake fake fake fake fake!"

"Naruto!" Ino cried, Minato staring at the blonde for several long moments before he asked "Everything's 'fake', is it?"

"Yes! Everything is fake!" Naruto cried at Minato, who leaned against the desk as he said "I see..."

Sighing, Minato picked up the phone, dialed in a number, and said "Hello, this is Minato. I need you to come and help a couple of kids who are having a bit of trouble. Yes, yes, they're in my office. No, they're not dangerous."

At that, Ino paled as she looked to Naruto and whispered "Naruto... I-I think he's calling someone to take us away!"

"What?" Naruto asked, then turned to Minato and dove over the desk toward the phone in an attempt to get it away from him. However, the man merely swung a hand and backhanded the blonde away, sending him rolling across the floor before skidding to a stop.

Naruto rose to his feet, holding his aching cheek as he glared at Minato and prepared another attack, only for the blonde man to level a glare at him as he asked "Are you insane kid? I could easily have you executed for a stunt like that! Are you really looking to die?"

Naruto turned his head to the side and scoffed as he muttered "Pfft, yeah right! You can't kill me because nothing here is real! It's all a figment of kaa-san's imagination."

"And who is this 'kaa-san' whose imagination I'm a figment of?" Minato asked, and Naruto answered "Uzumaki Kushina."

"So, you're the son of my wife, and I'm apparently a figment of her imagination, correct?" Minato asked, to which Naruto nodded and said "Yeah! That's why we need to convince her this isn't real and have her wake up!"

"OK..." Minato said with a nod of his own, one which Naruto quickly realized wasn't for him. He turned, only to feel a hand touch the back of his neck, causing his body to freeze in place. Ino started to stand, but she froze in place too, slumping back into her chair, eyes searching the room wildly.

Sighing, Minato looked to the two men dressed in long white robes as he said "Gentlemen, please take them to the psych ward of the hospital, they're obviously ill and require help. See to it that they get it."

Naruto struggled to force his body to move as he felt himself picked up and slung over a shoulder, the same happening to Ino behind him as Minato sighed and rubbed his forehead, muttering "First a man disguised as Inoichi tries to assault my wife, and now this."

'Daddy?' Ino wondered as she and Naruto were taken away by the white-robed men.


"LET ME GO DAMMIT!" Naruto yelled as he twisted and turned, trying to break free of the straitjacket they'd forced onto him, kicking his legs against the padded floor under him.

"Quiet down!" one of the guards for the ward called through the small viewing window, causing Naruto to pause and glare as he replied "Then let me go! I'm not crazy!"

"Yeah yeah..." the guard muttered before shutting the viewing window, and Naruto kept yelling as he listened as the man's muffled footsteps slowly faded away. Once they disappeared completely, he laid on the floor, closing his eyes as tears begin trickling down his cheeks and he forced himself not to begin crying. This wasn't the time to be crying!

Sniffing, he shook his head and struggled to his feet, once more twisting and turning, hoping to break free of the damn straitjacket.


In her own padded cell, Ino sat slumped against the wall, sobbing quietly, banging the back of her head against the wall behind her. Her dad was most likely being tortured, and until Kushina let them go, they couldn't escape due to the pure strength and duration of the fantasy. The only way they could get out was for Kushina to recognize this wasn't reality, but a figment of her imagination.

But how could they possibly do anything with all three of them were captured?


Minato sighed as he leaned back in his chair, eyes closed and rubbing his forehead in an attempt to stop the headache before it could begin full force. However, his attempt to stop his headache ended as he heard the door to his office open, causing him to open his eyes and look toward it. But before he could tell them he wasn't taking visitors right now, he saw who it was.

A woman with long red hair and violet eyes, dressed in a loose-fitting dress and an apron and being followed by a blonde-haired, blue-eyed teen whose facial features resembled Minato, dressed in a black t-shirt under a chuunin vest and black slacks.

"Hey Kushina-chan, Naruto-kun, what are you doing here?" Minato asked with a weary smile, and Kushina moved over to him, draping her arms over his shoulders and resting her chin on top of his head as she said "We heard what happened to you today and wanted to make sure you were OK."

Minato sighed, patting her arm as he said "Kushina-chan, I'm OK. It was just a couple of highly unstable genin who seemed to think everything was a figment of your imagination and the boy was your son. The boy even tried to attack me when I was calling the medic nin to come see to them!"

"Sounds stark raving mad to me." Naruto replied, and Kushina sighed and said "Poor kids, they just couldn't handle the life of a shinobi. At least now they can get the help they so desperately deserve."

"Hmmm." Minato said, looking to the younger blonde as he asked "So Naruto-kun, how was your day."

"Me and Sasuke just hung out, trained a little with Kakashi-sensei, you know the usual." Naruto said, and Kushina smiled as she said "You and Sasuke have practically been joined at the hip since you were babies."

Minato suddenly smiled and said "Hey Kushina-chan, what're you making for dinner tonight?"

"Oh, I think I'm just gonna surprise you." Kushina said, and Minato faked a pout as he said "But Kushina..."

"That doesn't work on me Minato, and you know it." Kushina replied, Minato sighing as he rested his head in his hand and looked to Naruto with a smile and asked "So Naruto, how has your work on the Hiraishin been going lately."

"Hard."

"I know, but think about it this way; you're only learning it, I had to create it!" Minato said, Naruto smirking as he replied "Yeah, but I'm gonna improve it."

"I don't doubt it, you are my son after all." Minato said, reaching across the desk and ruffling the blonde locks so much like his own. "Now, let's head home so Kushina-chan can get to cooking us another delicious dinner."

"YATTA!" Naruto cheered, Kushina laughing as she said "I think he loves my cooking more than you do, Minato-kun."

"I doubt that." Minato said, standing from his chair and stretching before wrapping an arm around Kushina's waist as he added "Come on, let's go."


Yawning, Naruto blinked his bleary eyes as he sat up and stretched his arms over his head. Smacking his lips slightly, he looked around the room he was currently residing in as he absently scratched his stomach as he muttered "Huh, when did I go to sleep?"

After a few moments, his eyes widened and he stared down at himself, realizing he was freed from the straitjacket, which was laying nearby. Further investigation brought the discovery of a single, three-pronged kunai laying near him.

Picking it up, Naruto turned it in his hands as he carefully studied it, trying to remember where exactly he'd seen this particular style of kunai before. He knew he'd seen it somewhere, but couldn't for the life of him remember where that was.

After several moments, he shrugged and stood to his feet, stretching out his body and groaning as joints the jacket had restricted popped from sudden use before slipping the three-pronged kunai into his back pocket.

"Now, how do I get out of this room?" Naruto wondered aloud, looking at his surroundings before his eyes settled on the door, and seemingly only way to get out of the room. Shrugging, Naruto walked over to it and carefully tried it, pushing on it just enough to see it was indeed opened.

He had to stop himself from letting out a cry of joy at his discovery, and pushed it open far enough to peak out into the hallway. Not seeing anyone down one way and not hearing anyone making a commotion due to the door opening. Carefully slipping out the door, he shut it closed and looked around the hallway, crossing his arms as he muttered "Where the heck are they keeping Ino-chan?"

After several seconds of waiting, he realized that his current string of good luck had come to an end, and the answer wasn't going to be given to him. Slumping slightly, Naruto sighed, pouting as he muttered "Dammit."

Quickly straightening up, he braced himself and nodded to noone in particular, saying "Well, looks like I'm gonna have to find Ino myself."

He then snickered silently and said "Hehe, finding a pretty girl trapped in a strange place surrounded by enemies without help and limited supplies. This is like one of those awesome ninja stories Jiji used to tell me!"

As he began moving silently down the hallway, he smirked and thought 'Don't worry Ino-chan, this particular story starring Uzumaki Naruto is going to have a happy ending, dattebayo!'