This is an idea I've had for a while.
It might take a while to update due to my other fanfictions and the exams I'm currently taking.
Read, review, enjoy!


The Doctor was, currently, fairly tired. The TARDIS was in orbit around one of the smaller stars in the Andromeda galaxy, and currently there wasn't anything to do on board; no Cybermen attempting to break into the TARDIS, or any other variety of disaster. It was quite an event, actually.

As a result, he was currently attempting to get some sleep in the first bedroom when the TARDIS started to hum, the noise gently rising to alert him to something.

"What?" he asked, groggily.

We have a visitor arriving in about five minutes, the TARDIS said gently.

"What?!!" The Doctor was now fully awake. "In here?"

Where else? she responded tartly. It's not like there's any kind of atmosphere outside…

"In here? As in, the bedroom, or the console room, or what?" he asked, struggling to pull on a pair of blue suit trousers.

In the console room. Four minutes.

"And how exactly is this mysterious 'visitor' going to get in here?"

Teleportation, of course. What did you expect?

"Great," he muttered. "Another person with a vortex manipulator. Just what I needed… I was about to go to sleep! I need to sleep!" He paused in the process of putting on the shirt. "Where's my suit jacket?"

Back of the cupboard, came the reply, amused. Two point five minutes.

The jacket was promptly removed, as the Doctor put in on, and checked his reflection. "All fine. Right." Now for this 'visitor'. He opened the door, then realised he'd left his screwdriver on the bed, and replaced it in his pocket.

One minute now, she sang.

The Doctor sprinted for the door, and down the corridor to the console room, flinging the door open dramatically.

There was no-one there. He pouted, then sat down on an office swivel chair, waiting for the mysterious visitor to turn up.

Five, four, three, two, one…

Suddenly a pink feline appeared, floating in front of the Doctor. It waved. "Hi! I did get the right place? You're the Doctor, right?"

He groaned. "What exactly would Mew be doing in my TARDIS?"

The creature looked surprised. "I'm not welcome here? Hang on, how do you know my name?"

"Even if I've never been to your planet, that doesn't mean I'm ignorant of it. There is such a thing as the Hitchhiker's Guide, after all. What do you want?" The Doctor folded his arms, and leaned back on his chair.

Gently, Mew settled to the ground. "You have no idea how tiring it is being the god of mischief," she complained. "Well… goddess. Whatever."

"You want a break?" the Doctor asked, realising where this was going.

"All those years, and mischief-making starts to take its toll. It gets boring. I figured you'd probably understand." She flicked her tail in emphasis. "I was hoping you might want to take my place."

"How long?" he asked, suspiciously.

"Oh, just a week," Mew replied innocently.

The Time Lord had seen too much distortion of time and space to take this at face value. "For me or you?"

"Both, of course. What would you expect of me?" asked Mew, pretending to be personally wounded.

The Doctor snorted. "Given your reputation…" He trailed off. "What exactly are your duties anyway?"

"Chief mischief-maker. You know how it is… making sure life in the Halls of Origin stays interesting, sorting out reborns… that sort of thing." She shrugged.

"And no-one's going to notice that a 1'4" pink kitten has been replaced by a 6'1" humanoid creature?" he asked, voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Probably not. They'd just think it was another of my pranks. Yes or no?"

The Doctor hesitated. It was tempting, actually, all the more so since he'd never visited that particular planet. He didn't even know its location, unfortunately, due to the fact that it tended to move rather more than most planets did. It suffered a lot of 'legendary' events, legendary in this case being literal.

"Okay. But you'll have to show me where it is right now."

"Sure!" Mew did a backflip in midair, and flew over to the console as the Doctor followed on his swivel chair. She hovered over a button. "What happens if I push this?"

"You know what they say about pushing big red buttons?"

"No."

"You know what they say about curiosity and the cat, then?"

"Actually, they say that about curiosity and the Espeon, but never mind." The creature shut her eyes for a second, as a blue aura focused around her and the humming in the TARDIS intensified. Mew opened her eyes as the aura and humming faded. "There, done," she said, satisfied.

"Wow. Psychic coordinates transfer, I'm guessing? Right!" He pulled a lever down fully, then his fingers danced over the console too fast for even Mew to make out. "You might want to hold onto something," he added, just before pressing the big red button. The Doctor grabbed the railing as the noise changed to a rising and falling wheezing noise.

"Why?" asked Mew, just as the TARDIS started to shake and she was knocked flying by the office chair. She was just about to hit the wall when the Doctor caught her by the tail.

"Ow…" A shower of jelly babies passed inexplicably overhead. Mew focused, and telekinetically caught a few, pulling them over towards her and eating them. "Ah… sugar… much better."

The TARDIS stopped shaking, and went quiet as the Doctor let go of Mew, who fell a foot before regaining a grip on her levitation again. "So where are we?"

He shrugged. "You programmed the coordinates, I assumed you know where this place is." He looked at the console screen. "Looks like an island of some sort. Uninhabited, given the lack of pollution, I'd say."

"Let me see?" Mew floated over to the console to see the familiar scenery of Faraway Island on the console. "Yep, that's the right place."

"Excellent!" The Doctor yanked open the door to let bright sunlight into the TARDIS. "Is this where you usually live?"

"Yes," replied Mew, leaving the TARDIS. "Why?"

"It's beautiful," he replied absentmindedly, as the scent of Lum flowers wafted to him with the sea breeze. "Reminds me of my garden. When I had a garden, that is. When I had a home…"

Mew touched his shoulder gently. "I'm sorry. I would share your pain with you if I could, but your mind…"

The Doctor looked back at her oddly. "It's probably best that you don't do that." He sighed. "Although I don't quite see where exactly I'm supposed to spread mischief to, though. There isn't anyone around."

"Arceus'll ask for me soon enough. Round about the time when Dialga finds out about what happened to all her clocks," said Mew, perching on his shoulder.

"Where were you planning to go to?"

"Oh… anywhere. Somewhere or other, maybe a different planet or three." Mew shrugged. "Does it matter?"

"Not really." His eyes narrowed. "What does matter is how you're planning to pass me off as you."

Mew smirked. "Like this." Her paws started to glow an intense crimson colour, as she laid them on the Doctor's shoulder.

"Wait, what are you doing?!!" he asked, just as the small pink feline slumped on his shoulder and fell to the ground, as the Doctor blacked out.


Mew was first to recover, mainly because she'd expected the effects of the Heart Swap she'd used, and got up, sprinting for the door of the TARDIS and diving inside.

Where to? she mused, then spotted a button that said 'Randomiser'. Being Mew – despite current outward appearances – she pressed it.

This would be fun.