Well it's about time they put up a Club Penguin section on this site! These adventures of the Great Hipengy the Playa have gone for too long without recognition. In fact, most of these stories were written a couple years back so I'm only going to put up the best ones. The best part is ALL of these stories are true and actually happened! Who knows? Maybe you'll come across yourself in one of these!
As usual, there are a couple points I need to make before I start…
-Warning! If you're a Pollyanna that has a deep love for puffles, Rockhopper, and all that is Club Penguin, I suggest you not read this.
-Rated K+ since there is no swearing, although younger kids may not enjoy it, especially if they are associated with the above bullet.
-Flames are accepted so I can laugh at them.
Now without further ado, here is the first chapter of in the life and chronicles of Hipengy the Playa!
My name's Hipengy and I live in a stupid place called Club Penguin. I'm a black penguin with a red Santa hat and a white beard. As for where I live, I live with a bunch of sissy penguins…sadly; I'm one of them. I wish I could have been born something else—a tiger, a wolf…maybe a polar bear so I could devour every stinking penguin that crossed my path. Seriously…these guys are idiots. But not me or my best friend Rhutter. We've cheated more idiot penguins that you can imagine. For everything I've done, I'm surprised the police haven't caught up to me yet. But what the heck? This is a stupid organization. But I manage. I better than manage. I'm Hipengy! I'm a playa. My life must be filled with fun at all times. Anyways…let's start at the beginning…the most major event that started it all!
~Chapter 1:How it all Started
I forget where I met her. Maybe it was the pizza parlor, or the coffee shop, but who really cares? Her name was Pinkwie and she was a simple, dark blue penguin. There was a certain charm about her at first, but then it happens with all the stupid ones: they become monsters. We hung out. I certainly remember the way I kicked her butt at mancala and sled racing. We hung out and did A LOT together. Finally, I invited her to the nightclub and we were dancing on the southern side of the floor when she got carried away.
"I…" She started off. She could have said anything! "…Am gay…married a tree…ate your mother…wish I were a duck…" Anything! But then she "hearted" and said "Hipengy." By the time she made another heart, I was long gone, ready to escape to Canada. But this was too interesting so I stayed. In my excitement, I found more girls. One simply had to ask "Boy or girl?" I would say boy and they were on me like flies to crap! Only I'm way to cool for crap.
Anyways, girls were crowding around me left and right, so I escaped to the beach. Two followed and the rest gave up. Ones name was…shoot, I forget. I guess she wasn't that important. The other one's name was Stewie and she—who names their kid Stewie?! Well, she was smitten with my good looks and charm. The other girl was the same way and couldn't even talk because she was so busy making hearts. Stewie kept asking if I loved her when suddenly, I was surrounded on my beach chair by a mob of angry penguins! A threatening-looking green one stepped out from the group. She was the leader, and her name was Hershey.
"Hipengy!" She snarled, the others growling from behind her, their short feathers seeming to bristle as they glared at me. I sat on my beach chair, staring like a deer caught in headlights. Hershey went on, "You left Pinkwie! She's in her igloo, and she's really sad! Go there…RIGHT NOW!" The penguins closed in, hissing. Then my mind went blank. No seriously, it went totally blank.
I can't even remember what happened.
How's THAT for a climax?
Maybe I can't remember because they drugged me or something.
Overall, that's what started my playa days and I never saw Pinkwie again. Sometimes I wonder what happened to her. Although I hope to never encounter her again, I wonder who her next victim was. But the real question is…
Who is my next victim?
~End Chapter One
They get longer and more funny/interesting later on. Please review or alert. Reviewers get chocolate chip cookies. Come on, you know you want to…