This was written by me (Rebecca).
One and the Same
"What are you thinking so hard about?" Frankie asked, sitting across from me behind the top of my computer.
I was staring at a picture of Mello and Deidara topless on my laptop. "They're the same," I said.
"Who?" I spun the computer around to show her the picture. Frankie immediately started to stroke Mello.
"Frankie," Rewind said, "you know that's a picture, right?"
Frankie glared at Rewind and went back to her petting.
I sighed and patted Frankie on the head. "It's okay, child, I do that, too." Frankie didn't respond. "Frankie!"
"Wah—what?" Frankie asked, snapping out of her stupor.
"Do you notice it?" I asked.
"Frankie, I'm going to make sure the boys haven't destroyed the clubhouse," Rewind said.
"They look the same," I said.
"Hmm…" Frankie said, staring at the picture.
"Frankie?" Rewind asked.
"Yeah, yeah. Don't spend all your t-shirts in one saloon with the chair. Scissors can't afford to pay your dept twice in a nanosecond," Frankie said focused on the laptop.
Rewind walked away, muttering, "What was that woman talking about?"
"I don't see it," Frankie said.
I stared at her like she was crazy. "It's obvious!"
"Well," she said, "it kind of helps if I know what I'm looking for."
"You don't see how they're the same person?"
I growled quietly. "Okay, listen closely."
Frankie nodded and pulled out a horn and stuck it in her ear.
"What?" Frankie shouted.
"Can you hear me?"
"Hold on!" Frankie pulled the horn from her ear and stated hitting the side of it.
A few colored bouncy balls fell out and bounced along the floor. She hit the side a few more times and a trombone fell out followed by a jar of mayonnaise. A glass vase tumbled out and shattered on the floor after another few hit.
"Frankie, I think that's everything," I told her.
"No, I think there's one more thing." She shook the horn and a family of ducks flew out, spreading feathers throughout the room and blocked all paths of sight.
Once the duck problem cleared out, Frankie put the horn back in her ear.
"Can you here me now?" I asked.
Frankie screamed and threw the horn across the room causing it to smash.
"Good," I replied. "Are you ready to listen now?"
"Alright. First things first, in this picture Mello and Deidara both have blue eyes and the same shade of blond hair."
"Now, Deidara has mouths on his hands, so, assuming that they are the same person, Mello wears those gloves to cover them up."
"Staying with the idea that they are the same person, Mello gets his burn on the left side of his face and Deidara covers the left side of his face to cover the scar," I explained.
"But what about the mouth on Deidara's chest?" Frankie ask.
I nodded slightly in thought. "An excellent question, Frankie, you make a good point, but if he was Mello first, the mouth on his chest could've been…added once he became Deidara. Or, he was using a genjustu or something to cover it. The shape of their faces are also similar in this picture and the same goes for their skin tone."
"I agree with you on all those points, but if they're the same person, then how are they both in the picture?"
I answered without s beat, "Photoshoped."
"Hmm. I'm starting to think you may be right. They are the same person."
"Why would you doubt me? I am the all knowing Lord Rebecca-Sama."
"All hail the all-mighty Lord Rebecca-Sama." Frankie said and bowed.
"Stand up, soldier," I replied.
Frankie stood and immediately started looking through the drawers in my kitchen.
"Kie-kun…what are you doing?"
"Looking for Mello and Deidara, I need to prove something." She held a knife from the knife drawer up to the light and stared at it.
"Frankie…Frankie," I said. She wasn't moving. I picked up a piece of candy and threw it at her head. It hit her and she dropped the knife back into the drawer.
"It was so shiny," Frankie choked out after staring at the fallen knife for a minute. "It was shiny and not covered in blood."
"You sound crazy, Frankie," I said.
"It was so clean." I was starting to get scared. I threw another piece of candy at her to try and snap her out of whatever she was in without having to get up and slap her.
Frankie shook her head viciously. "Damn it, killer version on me!" she shouted. "I told you that you can't come out when I'm at other people's houses! That's why we can only kill the hostages while I'm at my house!"
She laughed nervously. "You know how you always ask why I'm in therapy?"
"I…see." Frankie nodded.
"Mello!" Frankie suddenly shouted.
I turned back towards the door leading into the garage. "We know your secret!" I shouted at him.
He started panicking. "You can't prove anything. You have no concrete evidence that it was me," Mello defended.
"Yes we do," I said.
"I swear I didn't steal the Easter Bunny's chocolate!"
"You did that?" Frankie asked, shocked.
Frankie narrowed her eyes at the chocolate lover. "We'll talk about this later at home."
"Can we talk about this somewhere public that's not at home?"
Frankie just glared at him. Mello backed away and bumped into the wall behind him.
"We know who you really are," I said, changing the subject slightly as to avoid a bloodbath in my house.
"Who I really am?" Mello asked slowly.
"Yes!" Frankie said, pointed her finger at him.
"Alright," said Mello, "who am I?"
"Deidara!" we shouted.
"You mean the girly bomb lover?"
"Who else would we mean?" I asked.
"Umm, guys, I think you're confusing me—"
"NO! We are completely correct," Frankie said.
"We have all the evidence right here on my computer," I said. Frankie grabbed Mello's arm and pulled him over to the computer. "See?"
I growled and stated explaining our logic to him.
"What's going on here, un?" Deidara asked, walking into my family room.
"Deidara?" I asked.
Frankie and I were looking back and forth between the two blonds.
Mello walked between us and hid behind Deidara.
"Oh, thank god. They were about to torture me," Mello said.
"We were going to do no such thing! I said at the same time Frankie said, "Only until you started crying."
My eyebrows drew together and I looked at Frankie. "We never had a plan to torture him."
"We didn't?" asked Frankie, "I could've sworn that was the first thing we talked about."
I looked away from her and sighed. "How do you two know each other?" I asked the blondes.
"We're long lost brothers, un," Deidara said and laid a hand on Mello's head. "I'm older, yeah, so that's why I have the mouth on my chest and little Mihael here doesn't."
"Brothers?" Frankie asked like it was a foreign concept to her.
"Twins to be exact," Mello explained, "We both have mouths on our hands, but since I was born second, I don't have one on my chest."
"You have mouths on your hands?!" Frankie asked.
I turned back to her. "How did you—of all people—not know that? You've had sex with him."
She shrugged, "He never takes off his gloves when we have sex and when he does well…I'm kind of already out of it, you know."
My right eye twitched. "That was just a hell of a lot of into that I didn't need to know: ever.
"Hey!" Frankie shouted. "It be your fault that you asked a question that warranted that answer!"
"Herumph, I say."
Frankie flailed her arms around wildly in confusion.
"Anyways, back to the matter at hand, un," Deidara said. "I'm only here to tell Mello that the Easter Bunny is pissed at you for blowing up his base of operations."
Mello looked confused. "But I didn't do that."
Deidara laughed nervously and held up the hand sign for a henge. He changed into exactly what Mello looked like now.
Mello looked ready to shoot Deidara in the head.
"I would start running, Deidara."
Deidara ran out of the house—still henged as Mello—and down the street. Mello followed him.
"You are so fucking dead!"
Rebecca: me, duh
Frankie: my friend
Mello (Mihael): detective (Death Note) Frankie hubby #1
Deidara: missing nin from Iwa. Makes bombs. (Naruto)
Rewind: Frankie's dude who lives in her bra/backpack/pocket
The picture: look up 'mello deidara' in photobucket and you'll find the picture I'm talking about. It kind of has a yellowish background.
Henge: Naruto. Transformation Justu. You can change your appearance to anything rly
This was a rly short C/O list. One of my shortest. Review if you value your life…oh, I mean if you want a poisoned cookie……NO WAIT I MEAN— *gets cut off*
Till next time. Frankie may have a story for you all soon lol.
Rebecca aka Lord Rebecca-Sama