"Is it just me, or is this place... kinda weird?" Sora asked his companions.
"It's weird all right." Donald responded. The town they had landed in was indeed a strange one. The population was mostly female and there was not a single adult to be seen. Sora scratched the back of his head and looked around. Most of the girls were staring at him and giggling while the boys rolled they're eyes and shook there heads.
"Definitely weird." Sora re-agreed with him self.
Sora turned around to see a girl with long brown braids and large brown eyes staring at him. She looked to be about 14. "Hey. I like your Sora cosplay. It's really... real-ish." She said in a shy manner.
"Um... thanks?" Sora said looking cocking his head to one side.
"Is there a convention?" The girl asked.
"Yeah, cause you know, I just saw a guy with an Axel cosplay over there." She said pointing off due west.
"Axel is here?" Sora exclaimed. "But he--"
The girl giggled. "Axel? Here? No way! You know that's not allowed! It was just some one doing a cosplay. Like you are." She said pointing.
Sora arched an eyebrow. "Cosplay?"
The girl's eyes became flat and disbelieving. "It's the term we use around here. You must be new."
"Yeah! I'm new! So what's a Cosplay?"
"Cosplaying is the term we use for a costume that's designed to look like a character from Anime, video games, books, movies and so on and so forth. You are cosplaying as Sora. Get it?" She asked smiling.
"Cosplaying as... Sora? No, no, no! This isn't a costume! That's really my name." Sora said smiling.
"Sure it is." She said winking.
"Really! And this is--"
"Donald and Goofy? Yeah. I played the game." She said smiling. Sora scratched the back of his head. "Game?"
"My god! You my friend are beyond obsessed! You think you're actually Sora! Let's see your keyblade then, O keyblade wielder!"
"I don't know how you know about that but here!" Sora flashed his keyblade out in a spectacular show. The girl screamed and lurched back.
"You... you're really... They're really... I'm... I've been made unclean! I don't want to be Mary-sue! I'm a sporker! I cant be a Mary-sue! It's against everything I stand for!" She screamed and ran away. Sora raised an eyebrow.
"Every one!" The girl shouted. "If you value your Mary-Sue virginity then run! It's a cannon character!"
Every single person looked over at Sora and ran into their houses, with out saying a word. Both of Sora's eye brows were raised.
"What's going on?"
"Hey? What's going on?" Sora turned around to see another girl with long brown hair pulled back into a pony tail. "He-e-y! Nice Sora cosplay!" The girl said nodding as her eyes scanned him up and down.
"You look just like him." She said. She held out her hand. "I'm Kenya, Left hand woman of the Left hand woman of the Almighty Cannon-Verse Fangirl Leader!" She said. "But that name get's to be a mouth full. So we just call her leader." Sora took her hand.
"Nice to meet you. I'm Sora."
"Yes I know. But what's your REAL name?"
"Really? You're parents named you Sora?"
Sora nodded confusedly.
"They do realize that it's originally a girl's name… right?"
Sora did a double take. "W-what?"
"Ok, apparently not…" The girl said biting her thumb. "Well Sora! Would you like to meet the Almighty Cannon-Verse Fangirl… oh screw it! Would you like to meet the leader?"
Suddenly a girl with short blond hair and glasses perched on her nose appeared behind her.
"Oh, this is Techie. She's my right hand woman."
"My name is Anna. But in all honesty… Kenya? You are an idiot!" The blonde said smacking Kenya over the head. "This is Sora! As in Kingdom Heart's Sora."
Kenya's eyes got wide and the color drained from her face. "You mean… I just touched and interacted… with a cannon character?"
"Why does every one keep calling me that?" Sora exclaimed looking to Donald and Goofy. They both shrugged.
"I… I'm a Mary-Sue! NO! I'm…" Kenya began to count on her fingers. "Fifth ranked amongst the highest Sporkers! And I've betrayed them all…" Kenya began to cry.
"Listen… Sora, Donald, Goofy. You have got to get out of here! You're making us all seem like Mary-Sues!"
"What are Mary-Sues?" Sora asked.
"Any one who is not originally from… No! I cant tell you that! Don't try and trick me!" She yelled pointing. "Stop it! Stop it!" She ran away screaming. The blond sighed exasperately and turned to follow her.
"You really should leave."
"Stop it Techie! You can't be angsty around a cannon-character!"
"Okay…" Sora said cocking his head to one side. "I don't get it."
"Let's look around?"
"This place is severely confusing."
The three stood in front of a sign stuck firmly in the dirt right outside the outskirts of the town. The sign was about three feet from another which started the border of a new town. The frist sign read. "NOW LEAVING CANON-VERSE FANGIRL LAND! You're on your own now, suckers." Underneath it were the words.
"Pairings: As Cannon."
And underneath that were the words "Population:… who even keeps track any more?"
And "Cool_rain_kiss was here!" was up there too.
Now in the three feet that separated the two signs and towns, printed in large white letters, were the words: "Neutral land! *insert maniacal laugh here*"
Sora, Donald and Goofy crossed over into "Neutral land! *insert maniacal laugh here*" and read the other sign.
"NOW ENTERING OC FANGIRL LAND! (not as spastic as the Cannon-Verse Fangirls make us out to be.)
"Pairings: OCxSora, OCxRiku, OCxAny other male in kingdom hearts. And on occasion OCxKairi."
"Population: 5608! Not really, but I'd like to see you prove other wise."
"Cool_rain_kiss was here too!"
Sora scratched his head, perplexed. "What do you suppose OCxSora is?" He asked.
"I dunno, but look! Riku's name is up there! Maybe he's here?" Goofy suggested.
"Yeah lets go look!"
And Sora rushed off with his two companions.
"This place is even weirder than the last."
"It is indeed."
Sora looked at the girls and boys walking up and down the street. Again there was no one over 19 there. Only all these people were dressed strangely. Some people wore his exact same clothing only in different colors. Some of them wore Organization XIII clothing and almost all of them had keyblades slung over their backs.
"Excuse me?" He asked some one passing by. It was a girl. She had long shoulder length black hair and wore an organization cloak. She had silver streaks going through her hair and had bright blue eyes. She smiled.
"Konichiwa!" She piped.
"Uh… excuse me?"
"Ora! You're Sora-kun aren't you?"
"Sora what? I mean yes! I'm Sora. Have we met?"
"No, I don't think so. At least not in person. I'm Cexila, a nobody and number LX of the organization!"
Sora instantly brought out his keyblade and prepared himself for battle.
"Maté, Sora-kun! I'm on your side!"
"Ma-té? What's that mean?" Sora said cocking his head to one side.
"Is that Sora-kun, Cexila-chan?" Another girl piped up. She had blonde hair with blue streaks and a navy blue strip running across her face.
"Yes. Please tell him Hikari, that I'm a friendly nobody."
"Friendly." Donald spat. "Spare us. You don't have any hearts!"
"What are you talking about! Of course we have hearts! We have to! You cant tell me that the love Riku and I shared was a lie!" The girl started to cry.
"Love? You? And Riku?" Sora repeated.
"Alright… we may not have hearts. But we know what emotions are, we act on them, we know them. Its almost like we have them… Riku told me that." She smiled.
"Can you tell me where he is?" Sora asked.
"No, I'm sorry." She said hurriedly.
"Ne, ne! Don't ignore me!" The blond yelled.
"Sorry, Nei-chan." Cexila said. "Nei-chan is a keyblade weilder! Like you!"
"How?" Sora asked.
"Well you see, I was falling through darkness, I had been having these weird thoughts lately… like… is any of this…"
"Real or not?" Another boy with green hair asked stepping from the shadows.
"I had that same thing!" He exclaimed.
"This place is weird." Sora said.
"Yeah." Donald agreed.
"Shut up you pantless jerk!" The boy screamed.
"Yeah! You stupid animals! Leave us with Sora!" Nei said grabbing Sora's arm and pulling on it.
"Yeah! Get out! Sora even hates you! Don't you Sora-kun!"
"Donald! They're nuts! Shoot them with something!"
"Whew! I thought we'd never get away!" Sora panted.
"Yeah, they just kept coming and coming." Goofy said.
"They wont leave you alone you know." SOra looked up to see another girl. "How do you like it here in OC-land? Those were our worst OC's. I hope you wont think ill of us." She had brown hair and blue eyes and she had a keyblade slung over her back.
"Another Keyblade wielder?" Sora asked.
"No. This is a Soulblade."
"Yeah, it's really powerful and it unlocks peoples hearts."
Sora's eyebrow's fell flat. "Isnt that what Riku's old keyblade used to do?"
"Well… yeah, but it also returns nobodies and Heartless back to normal! But that's really not important! I need your help." She said waving her arms back and forth.
"Well, you see, my brother was kidnapped by the Organization. I think his name was Xaldin…"
"That's not possible, I already defeated him."
"How…? No, no, never mind! I need you to take me to the world where they took him!"
"I cant do that." Sora said smiling sheepishly. "Sorry."
"NO! You need to take me to other worlds with you!"
"Well I really cant do that. Part of this whole interplanetary code and what not. But hey! If I find him, I'll be sure to bring him back. Your name was…?"
"Alright, I'll see you later Saia."
"No, I'm coming too."
"Didn't we just go over this?"
Sora's hands were resting on his knees. "That was more trouble than it was worth." Again the three stood infront of two signs that showed that you were exiting one city and heading into another.
"Welcome to Yaoi-Fangirl land!"
"I don't even want to know. I vote we leave this place." Sora said turning to walk around OC-land and Cannon-verse land back to the gummi ship.
"I second that."
--- Mean while in the Cannon-verse fangirl palace---
"Attracted to a girl that's quite like you… quite like you… I don't know, hold on." Kenya twirled around, holding two earphones to her ears that were attached to a ipod that was secured to her belt.
"You stand there, with your long black hair. Looking so… something… with your savoir fair… Independent in your own world, rock the life girl, rock the life girl. The DJ starts to play underground something I don't know the lyrics! You're looking kind of anxious with your back up against the wall. With your back up against the wall with your back up against the wall! Don't this kind of music make you want to move at all? So what you gonna do? What'cha gonna do?"
The girl twirled around trying to keep up with the fast paced music. "Don't you walk away from me cause I've got to get you next to me. If you've got something something next to me! Just lose something something dance next to me! Dance next to me! Dance next to me!"
"Kenya?" The blond entered. "Your sister wants to see you."
"I've got tot get you, baby, to lose your self in me. I must say that you captivate, in so many ways that I cant relate, I've got be your latest thing, for you girl I could do anything! I've never been attracted to a girl that's quite like you! We've got more in common than you think you make me… do!"
Anna sighed. She wrenched the ear phones out of Kenya's ears. "HEY!"
Anna arched an eye brow. "Ok first of all it's: We've got more in common than you think you make me… MOVE. And second of all: your sister wants to see you. Something about the canon character."
"Aw… she heard about that?"
"Yeah. It's pretty bad."
"Well Sora interacted with at least three other people from our village…"
"Yup, and now we have our own section in the story that focus' on you singing."
"WHAT? No! We're becoming more like OC land by the second! I mean Evanescence is a great singer and all, and her lyrics are wonderful… but that doesn't mean that the Mary-sues have to mangle them ever chance they get! And I have mangled the good name of Family force five! NO!" Kenya fell to the floor crying.
"You are weird. Just cause you sing a song doesn't automatically make you a mary-sue. Besides… you're horrible at singing. You've mangled their name just by saying it."
"Thank you Simon." Kenya said. She put her earphones in. "Tell Nil I'll be there in a minute… I come from the land where the mullet attacks! Business up front! Party in the back!" She walked away singing.
"I'm going to confiscate that thing."
"HEY! Let go!" Sora yelled as countless 'fangirls' dragged him back into the streets of OC land.
"Cant do that!" One chirped. "We need your help with the war!"
"War? Oh come on! I need to leave now!"
The girls just giggled and dragged him towards a large black castle that loomed over the town. They dragged him through a large door way and through the exquisite palace corridors.
They passed several doors, all with strange labels. One read. "Class room 306: Flaws you need to make sure that your OC doesn't end up a Mary-Sue or Gary-Stu."
Another read. "Class room 123: Grammar class (OPTIONAL)"
"Class room 101: How to make the characters in character but still in love with you."
"Class room 409: Being Omnipotent."
"Class room 568: Choir class (REQUIRED)"
And finally "Throne room." This was apparently their stop. The girls all pulled him through the large doors into a brilliant pink room. There were photo's on the wall, well not photo's but a collection of bad and good drawings. Every last one was of a girl and Axel either kissing, hugging or… something that would scar Sora for the rest of his life. The throne at the end of the room was obviously gold and was covered in pink fluffy feathers. On it was a girl in a white organization uniform, she had long red hair and was clutching a note pad in her hands while singing a song that echoed off the pink and fluffy walls. She was scribbling at terrifying speeds on the note pad.
"Leader-sama?" One of the girls piped up. The woman looked up, smiled and put her note book down.
"Sora-kun! Long time no see!" She said jumping up and striding down to him. She threw her arms out as if she was expecting a hug. Sora arched an eye brow.
"Do I know you?"
"Oh, of course not. Your memories of me were wiped away in castle oblivion." The girl said instantly switching to a sad face and looking at the floor. She shook her head.
"Oh never mind! My name is Xiamn. Nice to meet you… again!" She dropped her head into her hands and began to sob.
"What are you talking about?"
"Nothing! Nothing! It's just…" She opened her mouth and began to sing.
"I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along"
Sora was a bit creeped out. The girl looked down at her hands and began to wring them together. "You really don't remember? That's ok. That song belongs to my self and Axel." She sighed heavily and turned and floated back to her chair.
"Come." She said waving him over. Sora shrugged and walked up to her. "So, Sora-kun. Allow me to explain the situation. My people are at war with another people." She said sitting down.
"Well, we want you to help with the war effort! We want our rights as OC's."
"Hang on! What is an OC? And a cannon-verse? And I have no idea what a fangirl is!
Xianm raised her eye brow. "Well, she said with a heavy voice that seemed to captivate every one in the area…"
Sora leaned back. "What are you doing?"
"I'm narrating, shut up! Where was I? Oh right. Fangirls are well women who survive off their hyperactive spurts and hormones. We watch plot lines like yours and obsess over them. Xianm smiled softly allowing light to shine off her brilliant silver gems that were her eyes. There are several types of fangirls, she explained. She was vaguely amused by Sora's confused expression."
Sora turned to the other girls. "Does she do this often?"
"Xianm held up her hand and every one fell silent. 'Wow, she's so beautiful…' Sora thought."
"DON'T INTERUPT ME! Thank you. Cannon-verse fangirls are girls who are content with simply watching the movies and cutscenes over and over again and writing using only people that show up in said plotlines. Now, we OC's are more creative. When she said this a sparkle appeared in her eyes and her mouth became wide and her expression estatic! OC's create new characters that interact and love the old characters, the contibute so much to the plot line and help all the characters and just plain make it better! She said passionately. Then there are romantic fangirls, that do nothing but obsess over pairings… and yoai fangirls which come up with new homo pairings and ways to make them work. And there are voreland fangirls… But the OC's and the cannon verse fangirls are the only ones at war. She said sadly. Sora could tell she was a kind girl who hated violence."
"Leader-sama… maybe this lowly OC could sum it up?"
"Lexa, of course. It's the least I could do after you gave me your blessing to marry and love your brother Axel."
"Axel has a sister?"
"Many. Any way. There are lots of different types of fangirls. Cannon-verse use the same old plot and the same old characters. One's you know, like Riku, Kairi, Leon and people like that. We OC's make our own characters and make interesting new plots. Yaoi fangirls like… guy on guy and girl on girl…."
Sora reeled back.
"And this one time, I even found: Girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on girl on guy, on sheep."
"Don't ask. And then there are romantics… they focus on pairings you see every day, like you and Kairi, getting together, maybe sharing a few paopu fruit…" She said. Sora gave a quick smile. "Then there are Voreland fangirls…. They like lemons."
"I like lemons… is that supposed to mean something?"
"Sex. They write about you and any other character having sex."
Sora was back to being horrified.
"Well, we the OC's and the Cannon-verse fangirls are at war. They don't mind any one else cause they just keep to them selves. But they say we don't have the right to exist! They say you cant be a fan of Kingdom hearts if your inserting your own character! It sucks! The spork us, and flame us…"
Lexa began to cry. "I mean… they forgave the yaoi fangirls after the whole 'Those Lacking Spines' ordeal!"
"Yeah, but that was partially because they were called homophobes and they didn't want to be discriminatory."
"Discriminatory? That's a fun new word! I'm going to add that to my list of fun words!" Lexa was surprisingly all better.
"Ok, so you want me to fight against a bunch of women…"
"And some men."
"And some men, who just want you to stop writing about you making out with people I know?"
All the fangirls gasped. "Every one fell silent at this. Xianm stood up and said. 'Sora-kun, please, just one favor!'"
"Sora's large brown eyes became soft…"
"Brown eyes? But, my eyes are blue!"
"DON'T INTERUPT ME! Sora's eyes became soft. Xianm… he whispered. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me! I can not place my self in a meaningless battle."
"Ok, that works." Sora began to leave.
"Wait! Xianm called. Sora turned around."
"No he didn't!" Sora kept walking.
"I'll tell you where Kairi is. Xianm offered."
"Sora stopped walking." Sora said turning around. "You know where she is? Tell me!"
"Xianm smiled. Battle with us! And thou shalt see her again! Xianm smiled and sat back into the chair while reclining her chin into her hand. Well, brave warrior? Wilst thou help us?"
"I don't know why your speaking like some one in Shakespeare, but sure. If you will tell me where Kairi is."
I posted this for Beth. It might get finished later.