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Chapter one

Reliving the Past

Four years... That's how long it has been since that bitch ruined my life. She cost me everything, my wife, my family, my home. Now here I stand in this god forsaken city, acting as a guardian for my so called masters. What a joke. They rule the immortal world, supposedly passing fair and just sentences upon the guilty of our kind. They are killers, they herd the unknowing into their castle. Seduce them with our supposed beauty. I feel their fear and their pain. I still refuse to partake in their brutality. They destroy our kind when they feel threatened, there is no justice, just a love of power.

As I stand here watching the foolish humans go about their daily lives, unaware of the nightmare that lurks within their city walls I again admit what we are. We are the creatures of the night, we are the nightmares of children. We are monsters. All of us. Even my previous family, they may live in a more civilized world but the fact remains, they are monsters as well. They have spent decades trying to deny what they are but they will never change it.

Yes that stupid bitch that destroyed everything I have, she was willing to give up her life to become what we are. I still wonder if my idiotic former brother ever went back to her. He supposedly loved her so much, she was his mate, his partner, his Bella. Bitch. She was weak, weaker than most humans. She probably broke apart when he left her, I'm sure according to him because of me. The fact remains it was not me that was preparing to attack her that night. It was him. The families precious first child, their god, Edward. I felt it, he was prepared to attack. I took one step forward to try to stop him and the idiot pushes her back into a fucking glass table. What was he doing offering her up to all of us.

Somehow I received the blame. I was the weak one, the one that struggled the most with our lifestyle, bullshit. She was his singer, her blood called to him, he needed it. I felt all of his desire. He was the weak one that night, not me. He wanted to attack her, not me. He was the saint in everyone's eyes, protecting his precious human pet from the monster of the family. Bastard. Hopefully he did go back. Hopefully he gave into the demon within and destroyed her.

She does not deserve to live, she willingly entered into our lives even knowing what we were. I will give her that much, I never felt fear from her. Her emotions were the only thing about her that was not weak. I considered going back to Forks and ending her life myself but why, she was probably destroyed when he left. So weak, it's disgusting. Rosalie was the only one that sided with me regarding the bitch, however, her emotions showed she actually felt something for the weak human. They are all disgusting.

Bitter, yes I am bitter. I hate everyone. I no longer feel love, happiness, joy or any other emotion that makes others feel good. I feel hate, pain, suffering, that's all I feel now. I am nothing but a monster awaiting the day another of my kind is strong enough to destroy me. I have lived for more than 150 years and none have been able to destroy me. So I wait.

My wife, correction, my ex-wife, Alice. I can not even find it in me to feel anything for her now. She chose them over me. She believed him not me. She never had any faith in me, she never trusted me. She loved that little weak human. She was so sure she would join our family. I guess one thing I can bask in, I witnessed Alice finally being wrong. She was always right, always forcing our futures on us. We had no choice, no control. Her and Edward controlled us, they were the special ones. They were always right, fucking mind reader and future seer.

I never had a say in anything we did. She picked my clothing, she demanded how we lived, when we hunted, what we drove but even with all control taken from me, I loved her. I gave her all of my love, but it was never enough. I was never enough for her. She never accepted me, I was a project for her. She hated my history, was ashamed of it. She would never look at me when my shirt was off. I was not the perfect sculpture like the others, I am flawed. I am nothing according to her.


Edward rushed Bella home after Carlisle stitched her up. I could feel his anger and resolve as he left. I understood his anger but not the resolve, at least not at that moment.

I felt Alice approach me, I chanced a glance at her but her emotions gave her away. Disgust, shame, anger and embarrassment. We were over, I knew it before she spoke, I felt no love from her.

"Jasper, I can't do this anymore. I can no longer try to force you to be strong and live this lifestyle. You are not strong enough. You have destroyed our family. We are moving tomorrow. Edward is leaving bella in three days. You have cost me my best friend and you have caused terrible pain to our family. Good bye Jasper." That is all she said to me before running into the forest. I didn't even bother trying to follow her. I knew, it was over. I had no wife, no family, no home.

I raced to the garage, jumped on my motorcycle and left. I didn't even look back.

*End Flashback*

None of them ever tried to find me. That day I was no longer Jasper Hale, I embraced my previous name, I am Jasper Whitlock. A warrior, a monster. I never again fought my bloodlust, it was replaced with endless hopelessness. I no longer crave it, I feed off animals because I have to in order to survive. I have no hope and no cares. I came to Italy hoping to have my life ended but Aro convinced me to serve him. Promised me a better future. I have nothing, I am nothing. So I stand here and wait for my end.