Sadly, I do not own any of the psych characters.
This story is taken after the season finale, with the Ying-Yang Killer.
Spoilers, most definately.
My First Attempt at Psych Fanfic, be honest on what you think.
The Perfect Distraction
Thirty-six hours. He had been awake for thirty-six hours and still nothing. Santa Barbra held no surprise in the last few days, nothing to occupy Shawn Spencer's mind. With one foot curled underneath his body, Shawn rested against the oversized deep purple one seat couch while the other was stretched out, the toe of his converse shoe tapping against the table. Normally, Gus would have been swatting at his leg trying to convince Shawn that he needed to actually get up and work. However, Gus wasn't there. Gus was asleep in his own place while Shawn had strayed far away from his own to stay in the Psych office. Only a few lights struck the rather messy office and the psychic merely stared at the oak table in front of him. Piled with papers, most of which were bills that Gus would sort through in the morning, it revealed nothing about what happened in the last thirty-six hours.
A quick meaningless date with Abigail, which had taken a turn for the worst once Juliet arrived for those brief moments, ended with Shawn walking from the Drive-In to the Psych office, hurriedly convincing Gus to take Abby home and go home himself. "She was right here." He found himself whispering in the darkness. His eyes traveled from the corner of the table towards the broken lamp he had tossed aside the day before. "Right here." There was something so troubling about the fact that the Ying-Yang Killer had been in his own office. His private practice that had become his pride and joy over the years. She had messed with his stuff, she had taken his own mother hostage just because of her need to play games.
Sure, Shawn had solved the case, caught the woman and saved his own mother. But the fact that it happened bothered him. His breaths grew heavier the more he thought about it. The Ying-Yang Killer even knew about his date all because she was there whenever he was. His hands curled into a tight fist before slamming it against the arm of the couch. Pain shot up his arm and for the first time, he had no smart comments to say about it. Well, what would he say. He was alone in this room. Gulping in a breath, he stood up forcefully, nearly knocking the chair over in force. He paced back and forth, desk to chair and chair to desk over and over again. i'She's not gonna get out, Shawn. She's locked up for good.'/i He thought to himself unable to tell himself anything else. He needed to get back to his normal state, he needed normalcy back in his life. He needed to stop thinking about it. His mom was fine.
But every time he closed his eyes, he could see the face of the Ying-Yang Killer. He could see his mother in the car, tape across her mouth and the little red light hidden in the popcorn box that let him know she was strapped. And each and every moment, the situation ended the same. The Killer won. Tight fists at his side, knuckles nearly white, made him want to hurt the woman, cause her the same amount of pain she caused him. Mess with her mind, the same way she messed with his. Jokes and comical actions, fake psychic foreshadows into nothing, could not help. Nothing could and perhaps that's what made it worse. As though he couldn't restrain himself for another moment, Shawn unleashed thirty-six hours worth of pent up frustration on the only lit lamp on the office, knocking it over from the small drawer set it sat upon. The lamp, a replica of Godzilla, flew a few inches and fell to the ground. Glass shattered everywhere, fragments of the green monster merely a forgotten remembrance. The shade cracked in two, revealing the blub, fading in a crackle ever so gently till it could go on no further.
"Shawn?" A quiet voice, fear hidden among the façade of bravado spoke out, loud against the meaningless silence that echoed against it. The woman turned lightly, her silhouette marked by the moonlight glow, and flipped on the light switch.
It wasn't the name that caught Shawn's mind but the light that suddenly embraced him. Back once turned towards the door was now facing a wall as Shawn turned himself. His mind had seemed to disregard the voice, already registering it as Gus. "Don't be a soggy potato chip, Gus. I'm fi-" Only, Shawn was forced to stop himself. There stood Juliet O'Hara rather than Gus who looked nearly petrified. "Jules." And suddenly it seemed as though all fakeness in his voice vanished, his words hoarse and row, soft in tone, almost as though he longed to break free from the walls he was forced to hold up.
"Are you-?" She stopped herself quiet suddenly, the overturn lamp on the floor finally catching her eyes. Her brown orbs flickered back towards Shawn and almost mechanically she moved towards him. "What's going on?" Although, it was painfully obvious what the answer really was.
"What are you doing here?" Forced to clear his throat, Shawn Spencer lowered his eyes to the ground loud enough to catch himself, to convince himself that the front he had put on for thirty-six hours still had to prolong. It was like a battle that kept continuing, his need for escape overwhelming his efforts to keep on pretending. Finally, he was able to look back up at her, hoping to catch a look, a smile, that would allow for a smart response. Nothing.
"I was…saw the light on." She walked closer, steps minimized as though fearful of what may happen if it was a step to quick. "Shawn, are you okay?" Despite the conversation at the drive in, it seemed as though she was okay. In reality, she had been hoping he was in the office, so she could apologize. But, she had declared herself independent of emotions and refused to be sorry for the truth.
"Of course. I was about to make some pineapple upside down cake." His eyes flickered to the Easy Bake Oven he had promised to throw out and never had. "Care to join me?" Normal occasions would force the question to be confidently expressed followed by a small coy smile and a wave of his hand. Only, this time, his words were strained, forced and unclear. He started towards the chair once again, only able to if he stepped closer towards Juliet.
As he spoke, chivalry echoing throughout the room, Juliet glanced at the pink toy oven marked ages five and up on the side. It didn't take a detective to deduce he was lying. It didn't take a detective to carefully figure out as to why a lamp was overturned on the floor and to explain his behavior. It took a friend, however, to assess how to help. She followed his motions to the oven. Unplugged. The beautiful detective took a step to the side, her arm reaching out and gently touching his upper arm and hoping for a better response than his faux humor.
Shawn recoiled back, taken in surprise. The facts presented alone gave clear indications as to the true response to the point where Juliet herself couldn't seem to get the words out, let alone be comforting. First one to regain composure, Shawn turned completely to face her, his gentle eyes lowering so a better look into the eyes of Juliet O'Hara was an easier feat. Close proximity as it was, neither took notice. It had turned into a game of survival, Shawn desperately reaching out for assistance.
Juliet seemed to have taken control of herself finally. The arm that dropped down to her side in reaction to Shawn's motions now attempted for a second try. Slowly, she reached up her hand ad cautiously touched his cheek, a mimic to back at the Drive-In after she kissed his cheek. Her finger tips, the only part of her hand that had refrained from the cloth of her forest green sweater, pressed against his skin, calling attention to her.
Unexpected as it was, Shawn seemed to relish that one motion. Her skin was warm to the touch, creating a false sense of security he would cling to. Slowly, his eyes closed and for the first time in thirty-six hours, Shawn was able to stand there for a moment and not be haunted by what occurred. He even expected himself to open his eyes and travel back in time to when he wasn't so affected. Back in time to find happiness intact. Back in time to the point where he already knew to capture the Ying-Yang Killer long before terror struck. And slowly, he opened his eyes, only to be met with Juliet's and himself back to the point in time he wanted most gone, reliving it over and over again like a broken record.
"Shawn?" Her thumb wiped away invisible tears along his cheek hoping that even if everything else was wrong, she could be keeping him standing up. The assistance he needed like he had often provided for her. Slowly, she bit down on her lip almost as though she were catching her words before they were even said. But it was clear what she wanted to task and understood that Shawn knew this for a fact.
"She had her Jules." It took him thirty six hours to admit what plagued his mind. No matter how hard Gus pressed, how long Henry attempted, how persistent Chief Vick had been, nothing caused Shawn to budge. Till now. "She had my mom. And I-"
"There was nothing you could've done, Shawn. And she's fine. She is with your dad, safe." Jules explained troubled by how complex this situation was. She knew that it had triggered something in his mind, but for it to prolong to this, she hadn't expected it to happen. Another wave of the pad of her thumb caressing the side of her face and slowly, she dropped it to his shoulder, letting it sit there.
"It never should have happened. I let her to me, get inside my head." Shawn slipped out of her grasp and walked towards the couch. On many occasions that he had pictured he and Jules to have a heart-to-heart, he had always expected himself to play the knight in shinning armor not the damsel in distress. He would make it up somehow. Dropping his body into the cushion, he let his arms fall on top of the arm rests on either side. Only then did he really take a look at Juliet.
She stood there, arms frozen at her sides, eyes widened only in the slightest bit. In a quick breath, she walked towards him and sat on the table in front of the chair, pushing aside random magazines out of the way. She leaned forward, testing her weight on the table before she put her focus back on the wounded man before her. It was hard to see Shawn in this way and Juliet longed for nothing more than to have Shawn back to how he was; smart, silly, adorable…wonderful. She wanted to fix things, make it easier on him. But he wasn't some victim. He was Shawn Spencer.
His eyes flickered from the toe of his shoes back up to Juliet once again. if he ever thought she didn't care before, he would have been proven wrong. He wanted nothing more than to make that look in her eyes vanish. Make the twinkle come back. It was her smile that he looked forward to in the morning. But this time, it was different. Instead of creating that stunning smile, he had forced the worried expression onto her face. Was he that bad? "Jules." A cry for help in the only way he knew how, Shawn questioned her being there. Carefully, he studied her face, hoping to oblige himself to a psychic vision.
She was wearing make up. But on the corner of the bottom of her left eye, he saw the smallest hint of bags under them, hastily hidden by foundation. She hadn't slept. But why not? Her nose had a tint of red at the tip, faded by time. She had been crying? Why hadn't he taken all this in before? And just like that, his curled fingers unfurled into an open palm before flying up to his face where his index finger pressed against his temples. His lips curved into a snarky smile and his eyes crossed. "The spirits are revealing-" He started as he uncrossed his eyes. Upon the heavy sigh that Juliet echoed, he narrowed his eyes almost pouting. "What's wrong?"
"Let the spirits rest of a moment, Shawn." Juliet offered, her head tied lightly to the side, searching for a reason to keep sitting there. She found one the second she heard his words, void of reason. He was asking her what was wrong. Straightening herself up, she barely acknowledged her own hand reaching out and curling her fingers around Shawn's hand. "Why are you still here? Shouldn't you be asleep in your own bed?" It was a question she hoped would reveal the truth, even if that was an embellishment. Hell, she even expected a 'is that an offer' response from him.
"I-ca-can't." He nearly stumbled over his own words, unconsciously tightening his fingers over her small hand, accepting the warmth that came from it. This would sound stupid, he knew. He would make himself sound weak, vulnerable, questionably afraid. He opened his mouth, licked his lips and fell back into the wall he had put up, forcing himself to not look like a whimp. His own mother had done psych evaluations on those who had deal with the Ying-Yang Killer. What he was going through was normal. But the difference was, he won. That's what people told him anyway.
Then it struck Juliet. He was having nightmares. She had failed to realize how even in the aftermath he would still be affected. She had seen this before. Years of working on the force had lead her to decipher specific emotions and attempt to fix it. "She's locked up. Your mom's fine. It's all over." She attempted to remind him. As though it would force it in his head. With each word, her tone grew softer, more cautious.
Shawn nodded his head absentmindedly, his hand still locked up in her hand. That alone proved his need for a friend, even if it wasn't Gus. His free hand gently touched his lip, bitting down on the pad of his thumb as he contemplated the truth. Readjusting his hand in hers, he turned his head away before taking a deep breath and releasing it slowly. It seemed easier to talk when he wasn't looking at her. He could avoid seeing the disappointment in his eyes. "I keep seeing it in my head. And it ends the same way every time. I do not 'pass Go and collect 200 dollars'. And I watch my mom die." He stumbled before dropping his hand away from his mouth and finally facing Juliet. "I know it's over, but…" he trailed off, choking on his words till he stopped talking and forced himself to clear his throat.
The words hit Juliet like a ton of bricks, dropping on her head and forcing the wind out of her. "Oh, Shawn." She gasped out for a second before scooting herself forward on the table.
"It was my fault. I should've known better. The crazy bitch was actually here too. Here!" He slammed his fist against the arm rest once again; the sound reverbrating throughout the silent office causing Juliet to jump even though she had expected it. He felt it in her had and his eyes grew small with guilt that washed over him like at tidal wave. "Sorry," he quickly apologized, sounding as quite as a little kid who was being reprimanded over a broken vase. "I just…can't get it out of my head."
"No one blames you." She whispered, tensing up at his apology. It wasn't right. It didn't sound right. "I promise." Her thumb stroked the back of his hand gently, her eyes fell against the lamp once again. She should have known he would be affected. "It's hard, I know but you can do it." It sounded cheesy and lame, but it was true.
It was close Jules. What if she had pressed the button. Or if I didn't get there on time, or-" Quickly he stopped himself, uncertain of how else to continue. The harder he tried, the harder it became to escape.
"Shawn, Shawn!" Juliet slipped her hand out of his grasp and cupped his face with both hands on either side. "You have to stop, okay? It's going to kill you if you don't." Even her own words were choked up, forcing them out as painfully as she could. "I'm not going to let that happen, okay?" She added on a softer note, attempting to grasp his full attention.
And she most definitely did. Unable to avert his eyes from her own, Shawn merely nodded his head as delicately as possible so as to not cause her hands to move. "I know that. But it seems harder than said." With that, he sucked in a breath and let it down before biting his lip. "I don't know."
It killed her to see him so distraught, so completely lost in his thoughts that peace was like the last resort. "You haveta try." She slowly let her arms drop to her side as she stood. In one quick motion, she had sat herself on the arm rest of the single couch, her head bowed down gently to face his. Her slender index finger forced Shawn's head to tilt up to face her and forced a smile on her face. It was weak, vulnerable in every manner. But it was a start. "Your stronger than this. I know you are, just fight it." It was like a command. A forceful recognition of what may come to pass if things were trapped in himself.
"What if I can't? It was…" He licked his bottom lip and bit down on it, his eyes staring into hers. He broke off the contact and narrowed his eyes before shaking his head. "No, your right. Absolutely right." The façade had come back, stronger than it ever had before. It was hard to get back into it, but he had no choice. "I have no choice." This was the sort of thing that he just had to do and if the only he could get through it was to lie to Juliet, he supposed he had to do it. Unwillingly, he looked back up at her and sighed a bit. "Now, Jules," he wanted the conversation to be away from him. "The spirit's don't like being sushed." His hand went to his forehead as though a reminder. "Are you okay?" he kept his head tilted up to face hers while he watched her lean towards the back of the couch to give her support.
Upon his words, Juliet paused for only a brief moment and leaned back for a mere second. "I'm fine." She lied quickly. But she felt as though her little visit was for him, not her. Even though the purpose of it had been completely different. Truth was, she had written a note for the psychic and had spent the good part of the night writing it out. Her plan had been carefully executed in her mind. She would slip the note through the door for him to read in the morning. Till she had walked to the office only to find the light on. Still, she knew this was necessary. Before she could even have slipped it under the door, she heard a loud crash and stepped in to find Shawn hovering over a broken lamp.
"Come on. Even the teddy bear," Shawn flickered his eyes to a tattered stuffed bear that was sitting on the dresser that Shawn had pulled in a couple of weeks ago. "Knows you're lying. Now, what are you doing here?" His voice grew softer, his eyes more free of his own emotional turmoil and ready to focus on hers.
"I wanted to make sure you were okay." Juliet replied, sliding off of the couch and took the longest time to readjust her shirt before turning around to face him.
"She's lying." Shawn stated in a high pitched voice, imitating the bear as best he could sum up in that moment. "I know, Mr. Charmichael." He stated in his regular voice before standing up himself and followed Juliet till he was in front of her, her back turned to his for only a few seconds till she turned. "It's three in the morning, Jules. You should be asleep in your own bed. Getting your own beauty rest, not that you need it." He quickly interjected before continuing on. "Not worrying about me." The second did finally turn, Shawn gave her the kind of look that could make just about anyone want to spill their guts. He cared, he wanted to help. That was the kind of guy he was.
"I was walking, heard a crash and wanted to know what was going on." In the brief moments she had spent her time looking down at Shawn, she had forgotten how tall he really was. That was partly the truth, she had to admit, and it was all she was willing to admit at the moment.
Shawn nodded his head carefully and sighed softly. "You said that earlier." He whispered, taking a smaller step closer. This time it was his head that was bowed and even so, the stunning face before him still made him feel deadly intimidated. His eyes lowerd to hands that she was folding and unfolding nervously, playing with her fingers. He caught a glimpse of a black smudge on the right pinky finger. "Mir. Charmichael would like me to tell you that he knows you've been writing. A certain diary perhaps?" He questioned, eyes back on her face as he smiled in the most caring way he knew how.
"I think the bear and I need to have a little talk." Juliet, surprised that Shawn had psychically evaluated that much. "And no, I don't have a diary." She quickly added. The last thing she needed was Shawn snooping around her apartment looking for a diary.
"You'd rather talk to the bear than me?" He feigned a look of pain that quickly overcame him and within an instant his right hand went over his chest, pressing gently over his heart. "That hurts, Jules."
Jules let out a small sigh and rolled her eyes. "Shawn." She moaned out, letting her shoulders slump lightly in the process, as though fatigue washed over her in that process. "It's not a big deal, alright?"
"That why you've been crying?" The humerous tone fled his voice instantly and his hand dropped from his chest to his side where it hug loosely before it reached out and pulled apart her collapsed hands. "Bear's a little chatty tonight." He added quickly, his tone not changing. Both of her hands were in his as he took another step forward. In a matter of mere seconds, everything seemed to have changed. It was weird, strange and he couldn't help but feel like he was responsible for it.
The shock on her face alone gave Shawn the ability to know he was right. As the good detective, Juliet should have never reacted. But along with the fake psychic, she had let her own guard down. To know that the one person who could make her smile just by smiling himself knew what she had been doing did nothing to put her mind at ease. "I-I'm fine, Shawn. I was just watching a sad movie." The lie suddenly became harder to state than ever before. "And quit getting information from the bear." She added, disbelieving how lame that really sounded.
"Come on, Jules. This is me your talking to. Forget the bear." He waved his hand behind his back to the bear, not taking his eyes off of her. it was interesting, at best, how in a second, so many things had changed. "What happened?" For the first time, Shawn was stern in wanting answers. On any other occasion, when it was just work getting to her, he would let it go. But this had to do with him. He wanted answers.
"It's nothing, really. I was just…writing a note." She figured it was easier to give in now. "For you." Her words were barely even heard.
His eyes widened, eyebrows shot up, arched perfectly. "You planning on leaving town or something?" He had thought this would simply ease her mind, his jokes coming back slightly.
Juliet closed her eyes slowly, tipping her head down as though fed up. Shawn, taken aback by her reaction, took to taking a step towards her. He was a mere inch from er, the gap between them nearly closed off. His hands slid up her arms and carefully rounded over her shoulders before cupping her face in his hands much like she had done before, providing her with proof that he was still there, waiting for her to answer, waiting for anything.
"Jules, I'm sorry." He whispered. His head bowed down as he towered over her. Even as he stood there, he could smell her perfume, soft and serene. He could practically hear her fast paced heart that raced against her, matching his own perfectly. He wanted nothing more than to grab her in his arms and tell her that everything would be okay, for the both of them. Slowly, he brought his head closer, his feet shuffling on the carpeted floor.
For the first time in the years that he had known her, grew to cherish her, Shawn watched as a single tear ran down her cheek. She still hadn't looked up, but he knew. His breath caught in his throat. Nothing killed him more than knowing he had caused it. Sure, he had no idea what he did, but that wasn't important to him. Not now. The bad of his thumb brushed across the tear stain on her cheek, wiping it off. Juliet slowly opened her eyes and tilted her head up to see Shawn merely inches away from her face. Removing one hand, he brushed stray strands from her curled hair behind her ear. And finally, Juliet took the final step in closing the gap between them.
A small smirk spread across his lips, attempting to not look as happy as he really was. He would have waited till Juliet was ready and now that she was, he was more than content. In the smallest of motions, Shawn carefully pressed his lips against hers, the taste of her lip gloss almost matching the most perfect moment in his life.
She resisted for a mere second before she fell against his chest. Her arms slowly snaked around his neck as she kissed him back. This was the moment she was hoping for. His kiss was soft, perfect in every manner. Sure, he had experienced but it was clear that he was meant for her.
If there was one thing Shawn needed ,it was a distraction from the horror of what happened. And Juliet was perfect in every way possible.
She was the perfect distraction.
R/R is all I ask.
I havn't written a fanfic in a while.