Disclaimer: I don't own anything but the plot to this story


Death, not many 17 year olds in life think about it as much as I have in the past two months.

Halloween night my parents and I were sticking with tradition, dressed up like vampires and passing candy out to the crazy children of the neighborhood. They would knock on the door and wait for us to hand out the small goodie bags my mother spent the week creating before their parents drug their sugar high induced bodies off to the next house.

At 11:20 exact my father, police chief Charlie Swan got a phone call from deputy Mark. A senior at Phoenix high James Tracinger was throwing one of his infamous parties, and it was out of control.

At exactly 12:03 my father walked out of my childhood home dressed in his work uniform, but you could still see his pale makeup if you looked really close. I tried to suppress my giggle when he swooped down to kiss my cheek. "Don't eat too much candy kiddo, you have school tomorrow." he whispered.

"Dad I'm 17 I don't think you have to worry." I laughed.

"I am your father I will worry until the day I walk you down the isle to marry the man I approve of otherwise leave me alone." he said with a serious face.

"Deal, but I think I want to get married the day after I turn 18." I joked.

"Whatever makes you happy baby, keep an eye on your mother don't let her try to cook-"

I cut him off. "The cupcakes, dad we have had this conversation every Halloween since I was six it was my fault she burned the cupcakes because I slipped down the steps in my princess costume and cracked my head open." I reminded him.

"Still, I think you should cook the cupcakes I prefer them the color they are supposed to be not black." he laughed.

"I heard that Charlie Swan now come give your great chef of wife a big kiss and go save the world superman." Renee my mother said with a straight face.

I watched my father pick my mom up and kiss her with so much passion it made my stomach hurt. My parents were the epitome of young love I was conceived on prom night and two months later when they found out they took off to Vegas. Despite the ups and downs that they faced having me at such a young age but looking at them now you would never think that they married before they graduated high school. My mother stared at dad as if he were the only man in the world and my father loved my mom more than anything. I wanted the love that they shared.

"Okay you guys get a room." I had to say after what had to of been a good five minutes you would think they would need to come up for air.

"I love you girls I'll be home soon." he called as he got in his cruiser.

My mother and I baked cupcakes for the senior citizens at the local hospital, another family tradition. An hour later we were icing the cupcakes and arguing over whether old people can eat sprinkles.

"I'm just saying Bells, they are going to be excited about cupcakes if they don't like sprinkles they can pick them off." Renee said.

"Mom you cannot be serious half of the old people can't see how are they going to pick off small sprinkles? Besides they are going to get them stuck in there dent-" I was interrupted by the doorbell.

"Who in there right mind trick-or-treats at almost 2 in the morning?" my mother asked.

"Well we don't want to get tricked so go take them some treats woman." I laughed.

She grabbed the bowl of candy and I listened to her walk to the front door. There was a short muffled conversation and I heard something crash to the floor.

"MOM ARE YOU OKAY?" I yelled walking to the front door.

There were shards of glass and candy all over the floor and I saw my mother crying into deputy Mark's chest.

"Mom what's going on?" I cried running to her.

Mark looked up at me and I saw tears in his eyes I didn't need them to tell me. I knew already. My father was gone. It's weird, the feeling of complete hopelessness the empty feeling in your gut when you realize that all is lost. I remember nothing of the night after coming to the realization on my own I let darkness take over. I woke up in my bedroom with Nicole my best friend sleeping beside me on my bed.


"Oh, Bella your awake oh god I was so worried are you ok-" she cried.

"Where's my mother Nik I need my mom?" I asked her.

She jumped up and left the room. My chest hurt, I could feel a hole that wasn't there who knows how long ago. Wrapping my arms around my chest in an effort to keep the pain at bay.

"Bella honey your awake." Renee said as she walked into my room. She wasn't crying but her eyes were red and puffy.

"Mom what happened?" I let the tears stream down my face.

"Oh honey that's not important we are going to get through this together." and with that she left the room.

I wanted, no, I needed to know what happened to my father. Mark wouldn't tell me and we got in a fight ending with me telling my god-father that I hated him. Nicole didn't know what happened. My mother wouldn't talk about it at all and for the next couple of days she was busy with the funeral home and lawyers.

Three days after my father died I got a call from Eric, a fellow Senior and class clown.

"Bella, Nikkie told me you wanted to know what happened." he said with no emotion.

"You were there weren't you Eric?" I asked him.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I -"

"Just tell me please." I begged.

"Well James was throwing the usual Halloween party, except Victoria decided to bring acid. The next thing I knew James had a gun to Travis' head because he bumped into Victoria's chest walking by and James thought he was hitting on her, I was sober so I went into the bathroom and called the cops. By the time I got back out there James had everyone lined up against the wall he was screaming about something to do with finding the leprechaun that stole his sock he was clearly tripping. There was a knock at the door and James walked to get it when he opened the door-" Eric's voice broke.

"It was Charlie." I whispered.

"Yeah, oh, Bella I'm so sorry, Charlie saw the gun and tried to wrestle it out of James' hand, and the gun went off. James shot him in the chest. Everyone was screaming and deputy Mark came in and shot James before he could shoot your dad again. You might not know this but James is dead too Bella."

"Eric thank you so much for telling me I can't thank you enough, I'm gonna let you go I'll see you at the funeral." and with that I hung up the phone.

I was out of tears and I think that even if I had them I wouldn't of cried. My father died saving all of the kids at that party. I was proud. He was superman, all the times my mother called him that I thought she was being perverted but I got it now, he would do anything for his town.

The funeral was beautiful, if there is such a thing as a beautiful funeral? Everyone was so supportive of my mother and I. My father was laid to rest and we went home alone at my mother's request. The house smelled weird and different to me, I realized there were no dirty socks beside his ratty recliner, his aftershave wasn't left open like usual in the hall bathroom, it felt cold and empty cold because I wouldn't feel his hug any more, and empty because that's how I felt, a kid shouldn't have to bury their father.

"Bella what would you say to selling the house, and leaving Phoenix?" my mother said as she made us sandwiches.

"I think I don't want to leave my friends, and start over in my senior year." I answered truthfully.

"Well I think it will be a good idea I am going to contact the school board and see if there are any spots open around and we can start fresh." she countered.

"If you need this I will do it for you mom." I gave her a hug and went to my bedroom.

I was going to be starting over. My senior year wasn't going as I planned it, my father was gone and I was going to move to another town, start at a new school, have to make new friends. I realized all the things I had lost so suddenly, Nicole and I were supposed to get arrested with Eric doing our super senior prank that we had been planning since freshmen year, we were supposed to graduate and rent a beach-house before we went off to college together.

My father was supposed to watch me get my diploma, he was supposed to walk me down the isle at my wedding, but that wasn't going to happen I was never going to get his approval for the man I wanted to marry, I wasn't going to get to see him cry when we told him and my mother they were going to be grandparents. Maybe if I was better, if I wasn't the trouble maker of Phoenix high, if I wasn't planning to do bad things this wouldn't of happened to me and he would still be here. It was my fault, but what did my mother do to deserve this? I let tears take over...

A week later my mother and I were on our way to Forks, Washington. The school board was able to get her a job at Forks elementary because one of the teachers went into labor 4 months early and they had an opening.

I said goodbye to all of my friends, but Nicole was the hardest. We had known each other since kindergarten. We were planning our lives together. This was going to be hard the longest we were apart was a week and a half and that was because Nicole got mono. That week and a half nearly killed the both of us, and now we were going to be apart for months.

"Honey I know your upset but I really think this is going to go over really well. Please just give it a chance, Nicole can come up for summer, and you have your cell phone and laptop so you can chit chat." Renee reassured me. I kept my mouth shut instead of snapping at her, it had been happening a lot since she came home and told me they approved her transfer so early.

I looked out the window and turned my ipod, Nicole's play list, Ur So Gay by Katy Perry came on causing me to smile and remember the day that she stumbled across the song and called me. An hour later just as All American Rejects Gives You Hell ended I looked up and saw a sign.

'Welcome to Forks W.A. population 3120' the sign was old and faded but the number had been changed recently. The GPS told me that we still had 10 minutes before we made it to the house-correction our new house.

My father's insurance money left us well off. I was going to be able to choose any college I wanted to go to. I could buy anything I dreamed of, but money can't buy you happiness and at this point I wasn't looking for it because the only thing that would help me find it was my dad jumping in front of me and yelling 'GOTCHA KIDDO HA YOU SHOULD OF SEEN YOUR FACE!' But I knew that wasn't going to happen I saw his body at the viewing.

We drove by the only diner in this small town and I saw the marquee: Welcome to Forks Mrs. Swan and Isabella.

'Oh my god how humiliating people probably don't just move here on a whim.' I thought. 'Great nothing like unwanted attention.'

The town was tiny, it wasn't snowing right now but I read up and it was definitely going to be wet and cold almost all year around. The scenery was so green, the moss, the leaves, everything that wasn't covered in a blanket of snow.

"We're here sweetie, We're home." my mother whispered, as she pulled the car up to a large house.

We were home but it sure didn't feel like it.

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