I'm on vacation now, so you should be glad I wrote a story at all...

I don't own Naruto

Tobi skipped happily down to the kitchen, ready to eat the delicious pancakes that awaited him. He sniffed the air and a few other things (bugs, dirt, Zetsu's new girlfriend/venus fly trap, and Deidara's clay), all of which ended up on his mask.

The young man took no notice of this as he hummed the Akatsuki theme song (It's An Akatsuki World After All) and ran into Deidara-sempai.

"Deidara-sempai! Tobi is going to eat pancakes. Do you want to join Tobi?"

He grinned under the mask.

"No, Tobi. Leave me alone..." he mumbled.

"But sempai-"

"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Deidara yelled. Tobi cringed and ran away.


Itachi sat at the dining table, looking at his freshly painted nails.

"Itachi, how long have you been studying your nails?" Kisame asked dully. The man had been staring at Itachi, hoping to talk to him about his beautiful half-shark wife. There was no use having her if he couldn't brag, right?

"Does it matter to you? Wait, pass me that shade of violet and the crimson shade next to it...I want to see if it would look cooler when I blend the colors..." Itachi sighed, seeing some of the new polish gone already.

"Are you sure you don't need to see a doctor, Itachi? That's a rose next to the polish."

"Oh, well..."

Tobi ran to them excitedly, already over the fear of Deidara's tantrum twenty-five seconds ago.

"ITACHI-SEMPAI, TOBI SMELLS PANCAKES!"

"Tobi, Konan and Pein are making pancakes. They aren't done yet." Kisame snorted at Tobi's stupidity.

"OH...RIGHT!!!!!"

Once again, Tobi was out of sight.

"So can you give me that crimson shade, Kisame?" Itachi asked.

Kisame sighed, very stressed.


"DON'T WORRY PANCAKES, TOBI WILL BE THE FIRST TO- oomph!"

"HEY, WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, BITCH!" Hidan yelled.

"Hidan, calm down..." Kakuzu scolded him.

"Yeah, well-"

"Just shut-"

"What are you-"

"Tobi will be going away now..." the said man whispered.

Tobi is a good boy, so he will leave them alone, Tobi thought to himself.


Downstairs, Pein was flipping the pancakes, and Konan was pouring milk and coffee into various cups.

Tobi fell headfirst down the stairs, ready to devour his precious pancakes.

"PANCAKES, DADDY WILL EAT YOU! THEN YOU'LL BE SAFE AND SOUND IN MY TUMMY!" he screamed into Pein's ears.

"Tobi, if you don't calm down, I will not make any pancakes for you," Pein stated.

"Come over here and have some milk, Tobi. It'll calm you down," Konan gestured for the masked man to come over.

At least, I hope it will, Konan mentally added.

"Are the pancakes done yet?" Tobi asked.

"No."

"Okay."

"..."

"How about now?"

"No."

"Or now?"

"No."

"Now?"

"...SHUT UP, TOBI!" Konan was pissed off.

You see, Konan only had enough coffee tho deal with the zombie brothers and the blind Itachi. She didn't expect Tobi to be awake before breakfast ended. Unfortunately, Tobi's pancake detector of a nose sensed pancakes, and the man was awake.

Just as Tobi was about to eat the entire plate of pancakes set before him, Itachi walked up and said, "Tobi? Are those pancakes?"

Sadly, Itachi was asking the pancakes and referring to Tobi as the pancakes.

And this was how breakfast was for most days in the Akatsuki hideout.