Disclaimer: I do not own Star Trek and I do not make any money from these writing.

Title: Sacrifice

Author: Raythe

Pairing: Kirk/Spock

Fandom: Star Trek XI (2009 Movie) – Abrams Universe

Warnings: Slash, First Time, Romance, AU, WIP

Summary: Just a note of thanks to Osa who gave me some excellent information regarding the reproductive odds of a mixed species being's ability to have children.

POV: This chapter is done in Spock's POV.

Feedback is like crack to me! I appreciate each and every note of encouragement and constructive criticism. Please continue to let me know what you think.


ANNOUNCEMENT – Sorry for the long break in updating. This announcement explains what I was doing.

I have opened a website for my original works (.com).

There are slash/yaoi and het novels and manga based in the supernatural and science fiction genres. So if you like the writing style/stories of my fanfic, you may very well like my original stuff and the manga based on them are AWESOME.

Please come check it out!

BTW – I will be updating my fanfic (on a more regular basis now) so don't worry! The next chapter of Sacrifice is coming.


Spock's POV

Spock masked his anguish at leaving Jim's side by steeling his face into the familiar calm façade he always wore. He answered automatically to a waiter who gave him an effervescent juice. The goblet sat untouched in his hand, the condensation on the glass moistening his skin. While the anguish might have been mastered, his impatience was not. He had the uncharacteristic urge to hurl the glass at the wall. His father was the cause of his frustration.

Sarek had drawn him away from his Captain's side in order to introduce him to T'Sai, a potential mate for him in Sarek's mind. A mate. The human side of him wanted to laugh, or maybe cry, at the thought while the Vulcan side wondered if his father wasn't a bit delusional.

Due to his mixed heritage, Spock was sterile. Not a suitable match for any Vulcan who wanted to breed, which is what all female Vulcans were required to do currently in order to save their race. Indeed, the whole concepts of monogamous mates would have to be thrown out for some generations. Women would need to be with multiple males if possible and bear as many children as they could. Spock could never be a part of that even if he had wanted to.

Spock had confirmed his sterility in his teens; verifying that the mix of Vulcan and human genes caused him to have an incompatible number of chromosomes to reproduce with either species. This was basic science as simply illustrated by Earth's mules; the offspring of a horse and a donkey, mules were dead ends, unable to have offspring. Yet Sarek, his eminently logical father, would not see or accept the mule in Spock.

And that blindness on his father's part was keeping him away from his true mate. The beloved of his heart: that's what Jim was to him. His t'hy'la. The inexplicable ability to know Jim's thoughts even without touching should have told him that they shared the greatest of connections. He had not heard of other t'hy'las having such a strong connections, but for once, his otherness was finally working in his favor. However, it had taken Jim being out of sight, with that creature Raines, to make this most obvious of truths known to him, to make Spock's feelings completely clear. He not only loved Jim, Jim was his other half.

Which brought his mind back to the simple fact that the plan required Jim to be alone with Raines. But still, without his father's interference, Spock would not have been so far away from him. At this distance, would he be able to hear Jim's call if he was attacked or injured? Spock could still faintly sense his Captain's life force, but little else. Was that a spike in Jim's fear level? Spock unconsciously took a step towards the garden doors.

"Spock?" Sarek asked, his voice almost edged. That elusive wrongness Spock had sensed earlier surfaced again. Sarek never lost his temper, yet he actually seemed annoyed and was showing it.

"Father?" Spock asked, his eyes snapping away from the French doors, their black empty glass panes mocking him, to face his father.

"Do you not agree with T'Sai's observations?" Sarek asked, his right eyebrow rising.

Spock realized then that T'Sai must have said something and he had not responded. That explained his father's frustration with him, but to show it so openly was still shocking.

Spock looked down at T'Sai's face. She was a few inches shorter than him. Her penetrating almond-colored eyes met his and he could see the intense intelligence in her gaze. She wore the traditional sexless blue-gold outfit to identify her as Vulcan Science Academy professor. Her black, straight hair was cut in the harsh Vulcan style, but in a rare sign of individuality, she feathered it forward to softly frame her face. Perhaps that individuality was why she would even consider him as a mate. Even with their population reduced to a miniscule 10,000, the Vulcan disgust for a half-breed such as him was still innate. But without a father's paternal blindness, surely a scientist such as T'Sai would guess he was sterile.

"You are concerned for your Captain? He has been alone with Lord Raines for 10.3 minutes now," T'Sai remarked.

Spock winced. She had noticed his nerves for Jim. To have his emotions so near the surface that they could be read and then remarked upon was the ultimate insult. He studied her face for the subtle signs of disdain such a remark would normally be accompanied with, but there were none.

He found himself answering her honestly, "Yes. Raines is--"

"A dangerous person," T'Sai finished for him. Her eyes flickered up to his as she added softly, "And I would not want anyone who mattered to me to be alone with him."

He found him eyebrows rising. Did T'Sai know something about Raines? Could she be an ally?

"Do you know Lord Raines?" Spock asked her.

"I worked for Cerberus," T'Sai said as she took a sip of her drink.

"Truly? You did not mention that before," Sarek said, his brow furrowing.

Suddenly, Spock had the distinct impression that T'Sai had no more interest in becoming his mate than he did in being hers. She had an alternative motive for seeking his father's and, perhaps, his acquaintance.

T'Sai's cheeks heated slight, as she answered, "I was the department head of Cerberus' nanotechnology division."

"I take it from the past tense of your statement that you do not work there any longer?" Spock asked.

"They put my work to unethical uses," T'Said said, nearly spitting out the words. "Illegal uses. I could not be a part of it."

"Surely, you exaggerate, T'Sai!" Sarek chided.

Her almond-colored eyes narrowed. "In truth, I am not stressing enough how mistaken the corporation's actions have been in this regard. At first, I thought it would be sufficient to merely resign my position in protest after my warnings fell on deaf ears within Cerberus. But I am privy to information now that tells me that Cerberus has continued forward on this most unfortunate course with the blessing of Lord Damascus Raines."

"What illegal uses are they putting your work to?" Spock asked, his hand tightening on his drink. Perhaps they would not have to resurrect an old crime to destroy Raines with, maybe a newer one would do.

T'Sai studied him for a long moment. "Cyborg technology. Cerberus is using my nanobots to turn living beings into something else."

"Cyborgs are illegal under the Federal Charter," Spock responded, startled by her lack of precise language in the 'something else'. Yet those words, and the inference that arose from them, made his stomach clench. Images of flesh and metal fused in unnatural ways sprung to mind.

"Cerberus treats the laws as if they are mere suggestions that do not apply to it in any case," T'Sai said, with a slight hardening line of her mouth. That small movement showed that the female had incredibly strong feelings, bad feelings, towards Cerberus. "Cerberus must be stopped."

"Have you reported this to the Federation?" Spock asked.

"Yes, but no one would listen to me, let alone act. Cerberus is the Federation's largest, most powerful supplier of military technology. While an individual's voice may not be heard, sometimes if their leading body speaks it will be," she said then clasped her hands in front of her chest as she turned directly to Sarek, an almost pleading look in her eyes. "Ambassador Sarek, you are a man of great respect on the Council. I believed if I could but speak to you about this matter that something would be done."

Sarek's posture, normally ramrod straight, seemed to go even stiffer. "So you misled me as to your interest in knowing my son in order to put forward your theories of Cerberus and Raines' wrongdoing?"

T'Sai flushed a deep green. "I did wish to meet Spock. I have heard and read many complimentary things about him. But I kept from you the fact that my interest in him can only be platonic as," she paused and cast an apologetic look at Spock, "as I already am committed to another."

"I see," Sarek said, how voice now icy.

"Father, her reason for seeking us out, no matter what the pretense, is an important one," Spock said. He father was absolutely still, a statue of ice, staring at T'Sai as if her very presence was distasteful.

"I hope I have not caused offense or discomfort to you, Spock," T'Sai said.

He shook his head. "You have created neither. For I, too, am already committed to another," Spock said, shocked that the words left his lips so readily. Shocked that he would make such a pronouncement without speaking to Jim first. But the core of him that was always seemingly connected with his Captain knew that, for him, at least, he was indeed committed to the other man.

"What?" Sarek asked, actually tottering backwards as if the pronouncement physically struck him. "Who?"

Spock realized he should have known announcing this to his father like this would not have led to many questions that he could not answer at that moment. "I will explain at a later time, Father, we should be discussing Raines--"

Unfazed, his father plowed on as if he had not spoken. "You are not speaking of that Lieutenant Uhura, I hope? I believed that she was only a casual relationship." Sarek's eyes widened in horror at the thought of Nyota being the object of his affections.

Spock sighed. Even though his father had wed a human and claimed to have loved her, he seemed to object to Spock being with anyone other than a Vulcan female. He tried not to see this as an insult to his mother and the part of her within him. He dared not even contemplate what Sarek would make of the true object of his love: Jim Kirk. But all Spock said in response was, "Lieutenant Uhura is not the one I am committed to. Though she is a good person and you should have no objections to her."

At the moment, Spock heard a feminine gasp behind him. He turned his head to look at whom it was. It was Nyota. Her slender mocha hands gripped the sides of her deep blue uniform. Her coal-outlined eyes were on his face, searching it for what he did not know. He was unsure how long she had been standing there, but he had no doubt that she had heard his words.

Before he could compose himself to say something, anything, to her, she spun on her heel and ran away from him. He swallowed and stared at the ground for a long moment. Spock had not meant to hurt Nyota, but he was vividly aware that he had just cut her to the bone. He suddenly felt a light hand on his arm. T'Sai was looking at him and there was a hint of warmth and understanding in her expression. Her reaction was almost human.

"Once the initial pain is over, she will realize how incompatible you are," T'Sai said. "And see that this was for the best."

"It was not the way I wished her to find out," Spock said simply.

"The choice was taken from you. It is done now," T'Sai responded.

Spock merely nodded.

"It is indeed for the best. She would never have been accepted," Sarek said.

Spock's temper suddenly reared. "Considering that I, myself, have never been accepted by the Vulcan people, the acceptability of any person I would choose as my mate is hardly important to me."

Sarek met his statement with silence and Spock felt something in him wither. A flash of memory of the past: his father's insistence on his adopting a fully Vulcan way of living and being. The way Sarek had belittled and rejected his human instincts and feelings. His father's standing by as he was mercilessly attacked by other Vulcan children. Perhaps one of the people who had never accepted him was standing right in front of him.

"Father, you need to hear T'Sai's report of Raines' actions," Spock urged, pushing his own feelings of dismay to the side.

"There can be nothing to report. I cannot believe Lord Raines would be involved in anything truly wrong," Sarek said, his forehead furrowing and his mouth puckering with distaste.

"But there is, Ambassador," T'Sai stressed. "Raines is at the heart of what is wrong with Cerberus. I tried to make headway within the company, but none would listen to me. And now that Lord Raines has given the program his blessing."

"Such talk is nonsense," Sarek said, a touch of acid in his tone this time. "We shall be eternally grateful to Lord Raines if Neos becomes our new home world."

"Father, have you not considered the moral dilemma that is posed by entering into dealings with a man such as Raines?" Spock asked, clasping his hands behind his back to hide the slight tremor that would betray his unease both at questioning Sarek and that indisputable strangeness that seemed to cling to his father like a second skin.

Sarek's deep grey eyes turned to him and Spock swore for a moment he saw a hint of animal night-shine. "Moral dilemma? Spock, you sound like a human."

Spock jerked back in shock and hurt. He thought he even heard T'Sai give a surprised huff. The disdain and disgust in his father's tone was like a flame against his skin. But Spock had long ago learnt how to deal with people who despised his mixed race.

"Father his actions towards …" Spock bit off the words. He would not expose Jim's past to anyone else's ears. Even if his father had been briefed on it in some fashion, T'Sai had not. "Raines has killed someone. And you have heard now from T'Sai how Cerberus had flouted the law and scientific ethics."

"He has done great things," Sarek said, his eyes lit with an almost idolatrous fever. "Clearly, you cannot contemplate the whole of what he has accomplished and will accomplish. Those who have gotten in the way of progress must be swept away. I have no problem with Raines or his methods, but I do have with the two of you who do not see that, at the very least, he is the Vulcan people's only hope."

Spock opened his mouth to speak, to reject this irrational stance, but T'Sai's hand was suddenly on his arm, a light pressure, warning him to remain silent.

"I can you see that you believe these things you say, Ambassador," T'Sai said, her voice cool. "Spock and I, obviously, have a lot to learn about Raines' greatness."

"Indeed, you do," Sarek said. "Ah, I see Taren, I must speak to him. I take my leave of both of you."

He gave a stiff bow before he walked swiftly away. Spock watched his father disappear between the mingling bodies. Somehow it felt more than just a normal goodbye. Spock's feelings towards his father were irrevocably changed.

"He is being affected by Raines. I have seen it before," T'Sai said. "It is like a disease."

Spock frowned. "A disease?"

"Yes, it is as if their doubts are washed away and replaced with utter certainty of Raines' greatness," she said, her hands suddenly clasped together. "I have watched those who spoke out against him become his most fervent supporters. There is no reasoning with him."

Spock felt a chill run through him. How could Raines do such a thing?

T'Sai turned to face him, her almond-colored eyes filled with a hint of fear as a terrible understanding dawned. "We must go to your Captain, Spock. Right now."

Spock froze for a moment. Not because he did not wish to go, it was what he wanted more than anything. But he knew that the plan required Jim to have as much time alone with Raines as possible.

"He is with Raines. He needs –"

"He needs us to get him out of there!" T'Sai said. "The changes I spoke to you about? This disease of worship? It always happened after the person has been alone with Raines!"