Inspired by This Addiction by Alkaline Trio
Everyone has Addictions. All in different forms, alcohol, drugs…even blood. Secrets are being kept in the Cullen family but secrets are meant to be broken. Edward and Alice are being distant. Bella is changing - in more ways then one. Bells X Jazz. Vamps, other supernatural beings. Very OCC story. Edward and Alice bashing.
Disclaimer – I own nothing but the plot and a few characters. I used Wikipedia for parts of this chapter. No copyright infringement is intended.
As I sat in the common, plastic blue chairs of the noisy cafeteria, I scanned the emotions that were whirling around the room. The adolescent teenager's emotions never changed, no matter where in the world we were, which school or century. I shifted in my seat, my black, torn jeans scratching against the rough plastic, crossing my ankles, and leaning back into the flimsy plastic, careful not to put my full weight on the chair; I had learnt over the years how to control my strength as well as other things.
There are so manyemotions people were capable of feeling. So many different combinations; for example interpersonal anger and disgust could blend to form contempt. There are least three different main categories in emotions – and me, being an empath needed to know each and every one; In humans and vampires, emotion involves "physiological arousal, expressive behaviours, and conscious experience." Emotion is associated with mood, temperament, personality, disposition, and motivation. Motivations direct and energize behaviour, while emotions provide the affective component to motivation, positive or negative.
Right now, I was getting a lot of negatives. I picked at the foul smelling human food, tearing the piece of white bread into pieces, to give the illusion that I had less on my plate then I did to start of with. My emotions had started to turn sour, as a result, the 'family' at the table, where getting a little pissed off. I didn't see why they felt the need to feel pissed off at me; it was their fault that I was in this sour mood. Alice and Edward's fault specifically.
Ever since we'd come back to Forks, after Edward's "suicide scare", everyone, everything…was, well, a bit off. Something had happened to the family dynamic.
Rose was starting to feel a sisterly love to Bella, which didn't shock me as much as it should have. Most of the hostility, and jealousy was all but a flicker in her emotional spectrum. Emmett…well Emmett, hadn't really changed much, except that he was more protective of the family.
Carlisle and Esme were the same; the only thing that did change for them was that they realized that Edward was a 'very sensitive person'. Their words, not mine. Personally, I've always thought that Edward had been stuck at the age he was changed – physically and mentally. So, it was obvious to me that Edward's emotional state was also frozen, much like his teenage body. But, of course, I didn't voice this aloud; I didn't want to Esme and Carlisle, the parental figures, to think any worse of me.
The people who had changed the most in the coven were Alice, Edward and his supposed mate, Bella.
Alice had practically done a 360. Ever since I had first met her emotions had always been pleasant; usually only ranging from Love, Happiness and Hope and most importantly, they were all genuine. She didn't have a bad bone in her body. At least, that was before Edward's mini breakdown earlier this year. Now, she still has the same emotions but they were almost as if they were a front to mask her real emotions.. What she had been feeling lately was deceit and anger. Every single bone in her body was bad. Okay, maybe that was a bit harsh, but I really didn't like the new Alice. Basically, she was a bitch. And because she was a bitch, we had drifted apart. We hardly talked; we barely saw each other outside of school. Instead of making me feel hope, like she once did, she was making me feel hopeless.
Besides the usual depression, and self-pity, a few new emotions were added to the mix of Edward's usual emotional spectrum; Rage, lust and possessiveness. I wasn't exactly sure why the new emotions were added but I had a feeling he was trying to keep them a secret. Edward had been growing distant, from the rest of the family, excluding Alice. Bella, apparently had noticed that Edward had started to got lost in his own little world as well. The only person that could get through to him was Alice, surprisingly. The two seemed inseparable, joined at the hip. They would go hunting together, go on trips, and sit together. Maybe it was because they had similar gifts; they could communicate better with each other because of their powers. But my gut told me that I knew, deep down, what was really going on. It was my brain, my emotions, that was blocking the truth from my mind and thoughts.
Bella had changed a lot. She had grown a backbone, which was a nice change to the girl that used to follow Edward around like a lost puppy. Her new attitude was feistier and it seemed as if she had lost that naïveté that everyone has when they're young. Apparently, she had finally grown up into a woman, in all sense of the word. She didn't blush when Emmett or some other teenage human made an innuendo, nor did she seem confused by the innuendo's either. Her personality had changed, and finally she had become her own person. She had found her own sense of style, she wasn't dressing like a tom-boy anymore, and she also wasn't letting Alice dress her up. I had heard, from the other humans, that she had turned 'emo'. I found it ironic, as 'emo' was slang for 'emotional'; Bella was anything but emotional. She didn't switch between different emotions as quickly as the rest of the teenagers; she had the usual emotions of an adult. I had also found out that stereotypes was a big thing in the modern society – the way you dress and what kind of music you listened to were judged daily.
The sharp sting of anger and betrayal shot through my mind and body snapping my attention back to the present. I quickly scanned for the source of such unhappy emotions. My eyes wandered quickly around the cafeteria and landed back on Bella.
Bella's eyes were trained on both Alice and Edward. As I watched her, her face contorted into disbelief. Both Alice and Edward's attentions were elsewhere, as well as Rosalie and Emmett. As i searched her eyes to try and find an answer I thought I could see her eyes darken to black, but they had turned back to her usual dark blue eyes by the time she'd look back at Emmett and Rose. She glanced at me out of her peripheral vision and caught my eye. I raised an eyebrow in question, silently asking what was wrong, but she just smiled sadly and shook her head indicating that she didn't want to talk about it.
At the end of the school day, Alice and Edward announced that they needed to go hunting causing Bella to scoff. As we were all standing around, crowding around Edward's Volvo trying to decided who would drive who home, all of the family had heard it. Edward looked at Bella with a concerned expression although his emotions mirrored Alice's; Desire and anticipation. Looks like they were hoping for good game tonight.
"Nothing." She replied, her tone flat. She then turned on her heal and stalked back toward her truck. Only seconds later, she was screeching out of the car park, driving home.
Alice and Edward proceeded to jump into the Volvo and I followed Emmett and Rose over to the ruby red beauty that was Rose's car. In minutes we were heading into the house.
Once I had dropped my book bag off at the house, I decided to go see Bella on impulse. I had need to see if she was safe. I ran to her house since it was faster and it would also raise less suspicion from the rest of the people in the house. Once I had arrived at her house, I could hear her heartbeat from the second level of the house. She was in her bedroom. Conveniently, there was tree placed outside of her window. Instead of climbing up the tree and copying Eddie's stalker tendencies, I jumped, and landed on her window sill. I froze, crouched, holding onto the sides of the window on impulse. I didn't know what exactly she was doing in her bedroom, and being her bedroom, I didn't want to invade her privacy. I scanned her poster covered walls, the bright colours complimenting the white and grey painted walls. Complimenting? Crap…I was hanging around the house to much.
My eyes landed on Bella's pacing form, her long legs bare and pale. My mind slowly caught up the fact that I was crouching on her window sill, ogling Bella who was wearing a tank top with very short shorts. I felt like a peeping tom but I couldn't focus on anything but Bella. Silently thanking God, that she hadn't noticed me yet, I shifted slightly, noticing that she was on her cell phone. There was a male voice on the other side of the phone, his voice deep.
"Izzy! You know you need it! Remember what happened last time you held it out for this long? We're coming to forks tomorrow to help you get some." Said the unfamiliar voice. Who is it? Why was he calling her Izzy?
"I'lll be fine Ry. I think i need to be focusing on the more important things that the moment. Like the fact that Alice and Eddie aren't acting very brotherly and sisterly at the moment." What the hell did she mean by that?
"Don't worry Iz. We'll help you through it when we come to see you tomorrow. I'll bring you guitar" 'Ry' said, his voice filled with reassurance.
"Thank you." She said, her voice full of affection. "You have no idea how much I miss you. I'll see you tomorrow." She hung up. Who in the world was this 'RY'? He better not have feelings for Bella.
I took a few deep breaths, trying to suppress the strange feeling down. Once i was sure i was under control again, i knocked the window. She opened the window, and her emotions changed to fear and wariness. Of course, she should feel fear I tried killing her on her 18th birthday.
"Jasper," she breathed. "H-how long have you—how much did you hear?"
"Enough to know you're hiding something really big and that it's causing your emotions to go crazy," I explained, shrugging my shoulders. I didn't feel like beating around the bush.
"Oh…it's nothing, really," she insisted. I could easily tell that she didn't want anyone knowing what she was talking about.
"What's wrong Bella? Why are your emotions running so high? And why are you craving something so strongly?" I spoke softly. Was she on drugs? Was that what they were talking about? I guess it would make sense…
"You might want to come in…"She said, stepping away from the window. I climbed in and sat in the rocking chair while she sat on the foot of her bed.
"Jasper, you may think I don't know how hard it is for you and the rest of the family to…you know...control yourself around humans… But I do," she spoke quietly, but quickly in a pained tone.
What? Bella must have seen something in my expression as she started talking again. "I know, I know. You think there is no way a human can feel the way you do."
I nodded, letting her know that was exactly what I thought.
"Yeah, I thought you'd think that. Listen Jasper, no one knows this… well - only Jacob, Charlie and a group of friends that have helped me in Arizona…Please don't tell or let it slip your mind. I will tell them eventually but I can't…not right know-" She cut her self off as her eyes began to darken.
"I promise, I won't tell anyone anything…just at least tell someone." I spoke softly.
She bit her lip and seemed to search for something and apparently found what she was looking for as she carried on with her explanation.
"Ok, Thank you Jasper…" She took a deep breath and clenched her eyes shut, as if preparing herself. "I-I'm not as human as everyone thinks." She stated, her voice barley above a whisper.
I froze. I felt as if i was going into shock. So she is on drugs. The only supernatural creatures were vampires, werewolves and shifters. Though the darkening of her eyes didn't seem to hint toward her being a shifter…unless…Demon?
No. She was defiantly on drugs.
Why? Why would she want to ruin herself like this? Ruining herself by chemicals that twisted the way people saw the world.
"What are you then?" I asked, completely confused and a little worried. I decided that if i went along with her thoughts that i could learn a lot more about what she was taking or what was wrong with her.
"A-A Demon" She whispered, stuttering. A single tear escaped the corner of her eye. Before i knew it, i had rushed over to her and pulled her into my chest. I rocked her back and forth for a while until her small sobs stopped. Finally her tears stopped, I pulled her away from my chest so I could see her face. Her eyes where tinted with specks of silver around the navy blue orbs; it was a lot like the moon was reflecting onto the dark blue ocean. She looked beautiful.
"I'm sorry for asking so many questions but" I paused, trying to get the words out, "I can't remember much about demons…" I trailed off; thankfully she took the hit and smiled a small smile.
"Most of the emotions that you were feeling from me were for blood…I haven't had any since a year ago and we're supposed to drink at least once a month – a few of my friends are coming here from Arizona to get me back on track."
"What was that on the phone about Alice and Edward 'doing things brother and sister shouldn't do'?" I asked, hesitating. It was the question that had been on my mind since i had got here. She immediately stiffened.
"The-T…They're cheating on us Jazz. That's why they've been going off doing things together." She paused. Glancing up at me, she continued. "I know that because Demons have two powers - one is that we know people's darkest secrets and each Demon has their own power; mine is that I can control the weather…"She said, her voice devoid of any emotion. I froze. My first instinct was to call her a liar and go back to the house to see Alice and prove that Bella had been lying. But as soon as I thought that, i mentally slapped myself. I scanned her emotions - She wasn't lying. Why would Alice do this to me? To Bella! Oh Bella...she must have seen everything they've done.
"I'm going to get divorce papers from Carlisle tonight…I won't tell him why; don't worry…" I whispered. For some reason, I knew that Bella would never lie to me. I had complete trust in this girl.
We stayed like that for hours in silence, both lost in our own thoughts. I didn't know what to feel. I was angry, I was sad…but somehow I didn't feel as devastated as I thought I would be. I felt as if I knew, somehow, and that was why I wasn't reacting. To be honest, after I had gotten over the shock, I realized that I didn't care less. I was…happy. Content to be let out of the relationship that had been built on lies.
I slowly pulled away from Bella and let out a breath.
"I'll go and get changed…I-I'll pick you up later…if that's what you wan-" For some reason, i started to stutter like a school boy.
"Sure…thanks" She said and hugged me tightly before going into the bathroom.
When I opened the door to the house I saw Alice and Edward casually lounging on the white sofa surrounding the coffee table. The cheating bastards.
"Where have you been?"Alice asked, her voice suspicious. I quickly blocked my thoughts from Edward, taking a minute to answer the Ice queen. Edward looked at me suspiciously; narrowing his eyes, following me as I moved around the room, taking off my shirt as I started walking up the stars.
"Uh….Hunting" I quickly came up with an easy lie, hoping that they'd believe it, "Is Carlisle here?" I asked, already heading towards the stair case.
She nodded and pointed to Carlisle's study.
I ran up the stairs, and changed my clothes; Edward and the rest of the guys would know something was up if I came home smelling of Bella. Once I'd changed my clothes, I knocked on the wooden door, the noise echoing down the hallway.
"Come in." Carlisle said, as he opened the door.
AN: Hope you liked!
I'm rewriting this story – this chapter has already been edited. If you want to read the rest of the story you can find it on under the same username.