Becky: Alright, so we were mucking around, watching Britain's got Talent. At some point, the lovely Emma (La Vie Boheme101) jokingly suggested that we do a spin-off of Britain's got Talent, but set in the Twilight universe. I actually thought that this plan was utter genius, and before we knew it, we were on my computer and researching possible acts and songs.

This is set after Breaking Dawn, so Bella is a vampire, but Renesmee doesn't exist because I don't like her, and I'm on the keyboard. So hah. Enjoy!

DISCLAIMER: We don't own Twilight, Britain's Got Talent or Ant and Dec (damn...). Or any of the judges, for that matter. We are poor. We are easily amused. We watch Britatin's Got Talent. What can I say?


The voice-over resounds through the packed studio as the audience go wild.

"Live, from Forks—this is the season finale of TWILIGHT'S got Talent. Here are your hosts… ANT AND DEC!"

The Geordie boys came, grinning, down the illuminated staircases on either side of the stage, microphones in hand. They stood next to one another onstage, and loudly introduced the judges. "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls… I give you… The Judges!"

The back of the stage opened mechanically, revealing the three silhouettes of the judges in rather compromising positions behind the stage. Suddenly, they seemed to realise that they were, in fact, on live television…and quickly righted themselves, smiling and laughing, trying to brush over their interruption.

Swiftly, they stepped forward, and hastily made their way behind their desk, and into their respective chairs. The large red buzzers looked rather ominous in front of them, just begging to be pressed, sending another prospective talent into misery.

Ant and Dec, sharing some kind of private joke that no-one else could possibly understand, turned back to the cameras. "Welcome, folks, to the live final of TWILIGHT'S GOT TALENT!" At this, the crowd was sent into wild cheers. "All eight of our fantastic acts are waiting nervously backstage… and this is where you come into the picture! Yes, this is the final, so the winner will ultimately be the public's decision. After all eight acts have performed, the votes will open. Even though this is the final, the Judges will still have the power to buzz our acts, and possibly send them offstage… but let's hope that doesn't happen tonight! The votes will not be counted until after all eight acts have performed… so you can vote if you like, but it won't mean anything, and you may still be charged."

"Now, the first spectacular act that we have for you tonight is…"