I've a newfound obsession with One Piece and I kept thinking about cute couples. This was the first to come to mind, and it's my official favorite. Zoro/Sanji! Enjoy. (By the way, this only took about an hour or so to write, so if there's any mistakes, gomen.)

Sanji sat at the one empty table in the restaurant, smoking. Luffy, Nami, Usopp and Zoro had gone off without him, leaving him to himself. What the hell was he supposed to do in a town filled with nothing but men? Well, maybe not all men but close enough. The only women around were people old enough to be his great grandparents. He sighed, letting the smoke curl in front of his face. A waiter came up to him and snarled, "Ossan, if you're not buying anything, get out. You've been sitting here smoking for damn near three hours!"

He glared, and hissed back through his teeth, "I can do what I damn well please. It's not like you have any customers waiting for this seat. And I wouldn't eat here if it killed me. The air smells stale like urine and it's so smoky you can hardly see. My smoke is hardly contributing to it." The waiter's scowl deepened. The veins in his arm popped as he flex his muscles, and cracked his knuckles. Now he was angry.

"You runt. You can't talk to me like that." His knuckles cracked again. "I'll beat the snot out of ya'!" He drew back his fist but was stopped mid punch when Sanji kicked his leg out, hitting him directly in the face. The bone in his nose snapped and when the waiter stepped back his nose gushed blood. It was like watching a never ending stream. His hands shook as he brought them to his nose. The look in his eyes was a mixture of terror and anger. Who did this blond haired freak think he was? "I won't let youb disrubt the peace of this restaurant!" He sputtered. Again his fist drew back for a punch but he didn't even get time to move it for Sanji had stood and kicked him hard in the gut, setting the poor man flying into the wall. Customers screamed but Sanji didn't hear them. Before the man stood up again, Sanji put some cash on the table, stuffed his hands in his pocket, and left. There was no need to stir up trouble.

Back at the restaurant someone asked, "Who was he?"

Someone in the corner of the room, obscured by smoke answered, "The best cook in the whole East Blue. He's a part of Straw-Hat Luffy's gang. Cooks or somethin' like that. Never seen one as strong as him before. All because you're all a bunch of damn pansies." Now, the men in the room weren't happy to hear that from someones who's face they couldn't see. If Sanji hadn't started a ruckus, that man certainly had.

After leaving the restaurant Sanji had decided to head back to the boat. At least there he could smoke in peace. The others would arrive in a little while. He deserved some alone time after always having to deal with that damn Luffy and his black-hole of a stomach. Not to mention that stupid swordsman, always making the ladies cry and that incompetent liar. Of course if Nami was on the boat it wouldn't be so bad but noo. He got stuck with a bunch of moron's. Nami was always the one to leave on her own. Itsumo. Once reaching their ship, Sanji climbed aboard. He'd thought about lying down, but had decided he was too restless to sit still. To his utmost surprise he wasn't the only one on-board. Zoro sat near the head piece, hands behind his head, sleeping. Baka. He's gonna catch cold one day. Or Luffy is going to kill him with his gomu gomu moves.

Sneakily, he tiptoed over, a devil's grin on his face. Then, with as much force as he could muster, without killing the guy, he kicked him in the ribs. Flying, Zoro woke with a start, barely catching the rail. "Sanji!" He growled. "You bastard! What the hell was that for? You ruined a good nap!" Quickly he pulled himself back over the railing, brushing off his clothes.

The blond was snickering a great deal. "That was wonderful. You're such a moron. You're just asking to catch a cold sleeping out here." After a moment he stopped and stared directly at Zoro. "Nan desu ka? What are you staring at me for?"

"Mutsukatsuku." He muttered, sliding to the floor again. "Oi. Why don't you make yourself useful and make us something to eat?" Sanji shrugged and stalked off. Not like there was anything else to do. It would take his mind off the bar and how much these people made him angry. In the kitchen he set to work making a delicious lunch for two. Perhaps the others would come back but he didn't bother. Why waste food?

An hour later Zoro and Sanji sat at the table, forks and knives in hand. Without saying a word of thanks, Zoro dug in. He ate like an animal, swallowing large bits of food, hardly savoring the taste. To Sanji, Zoro reminded him of a bear. Or a horse. Perhaps even an elephant. "Has anyone ever told you you're a pig?" He asked sarcastically, taking little bites of food and small sips of wine.

"Has anyone ever told you you're a nuisance? Or that you're annoying? Or that no women would ever want a man that came on that strongly to her?" Sanji's eyebrow twitched. What in the hell was wrong with this man? Everything he did made Sanji want to just kick him to the opposite ends of the earth.

"What was that you sword carrying bastard?"

Zoro paused for a moment and looked up. The look on Sanji's face made him snort and then laugh. It was so serious it was funny. Was he that oblivious? "You know," he laughed, "Nami just uses you as a tool." He laughed harder, nearly choking on his food. "And Luffy. Don't think he's nice because he likes you. He's nice to just about anyone. And Usopp. Well he doesn't like you one way or the other." A vein appeared in his normally smooth forehead. "And me? I'm just along for the ride. You're just one more 'necessity' on this ride to the Grand Line." He could take it no longer. He swung his fist around and hit him in the side. Zoro coughed blood. When he landed he damn near left a hole in the wall.

"If I'm not that important then why was that person so persistent, EH?!" He screeched. The vein had grown larger, and his face redder.

"Are you a moron? That boy.. If he doesn't get what he wants he will go after it until he does. That's the way rubber man is. You should have seen what he did to get me to come with. And Nami? He gave her hell until she agreed. And Usopp was one of the few who came of his own free will. And you Sanji? You were just someone that he needed and wanted. You were a 'must have', like a shiny new toy on the top of a kids Christmas list." Even though he knew it to be true, he couldn't keep the anger from welling up inside him. Hot tears began streaming down his face. Was his anger so great that he cried? It was. Angrily, he began walking forward but stumbled over his own feet. Stumbling he began towards Zoro and before he could stop it he landed on top of him. Their lips touched and locked.

Both were surprised and pulled back quickly, wiping their lips. Their eyes were wide. Something, a feeling, pushed Sanji forward again though. It was a pleasant feeling. He didn't want to stay away. Zoro's lips had been warm and salty from lunch. Zoro grimanced as the other man inched forward again, lips pursed. But he couldn't slap him away and ask what the hell he was doing. Instead he too went forward, lips pursed. Their lips met again but they didn't pull away. Sanji straightened himself to get better access. He'd move to sit straddle style over Zoro's long legs that were spread on the floor. Zoro pushed himself up so he was in a better sitting position. His hand inched around Sanji's body to grasp his back. Hands, soft and warm, grasped his shoulders. Slowly his hands inched lower until they were at the blonds waist. Sanji didn't protest. Instead he lowered himself until he was sitting, basically, right on top of Zoro's lap.

Zoro moaned. With skilled, calloused, hands, he moved them to the other man's lap. Slowly he began to rub them, stopping only inches short of Sanji's crotch. Both of them felt their cock's hardening. Something in them was changing. The thrill of something new and exciting, and the thought of maybe getting caught, though neither thought about that now. Sanji had completely forgotten why he was mad at Zoro and Zoro had forgotten why he'd been teasing the younger man. Zoro gripped the muscular legs when they broke apart and before either knew what was happening, Zoro was kissing Sanji down the neck, and near his ears, and on his earlobes. His hands were gripping his ass now, rubbing, and pinching pressing in between the cheeks. They both knew what was happening. Obviously they'd been deprived of sexual activity for so long that they needed release. And of course this was only a one time thing. Right? Sanji was a ladies man and Zoro couldn't turn soft, especially after the promise he'd made to Kuina.

Moments later Zoro was unbuttoning Sanji's pants. He could tell that his pants were way too tight. Wearing stretch pants all the time, he was lucky. He could last a while longer. Sanji sucked in a breath when his rough calloused hands touched him. His cock throbbed and it took all his will not to moan and scream. The hand began to pump slowly, fondling his other parts. The other hand still made small circular motions on his ass but they were slower and closer to the middle. Sanji bit his lip and closed his eyes. After a few minutes the pressure on his cock was released.

Zoro barely managed to pant, "Oi. I need you to do something." His eyes opened and he gasped. Zoro's green pants were pulled down and his cock was seeping. Sanji hadn't even noticed that there was no pressure on his butt any more. Zoro had been doing both of them at the same time, probably trying to show off again. What was he expecting him to do? "Do it." And just like that, like the light bulb in the attic had been turned on, he knew what to do. Blushing like a school girl he inched backwards until only his stomach and head were in Zoro's lap. Slowly he began to lick it, scowling at the sourness of it. He nipped the top and sucked but didn't submerge it completely. He licked the entirety of it for a moment before finally, after having his hair yanked, he put the whole thing in. Zoro took a hissing breath and slammed his fists into the ground. He could feel the soft tongue against his skin and the teeth scrapping the side. Sanji's mouth was hot. He just couldn't take it anymore. He gripped the floorboards, and heaved his body into an arch. Suddenly Sanji's mouth was flooded with semen. Surprised, he swallowed it. Zoro sat huffing against the wall, oblivious to the fact that Sanji was still in need of some assistance.

"Please finish it!" He whimpered after a few minutes.

"Eh?!" Zoro spat. But he could argue. When he looked up Sanji was on his hands and knees with his pants still pulled down. His sweaty blond hair stuck to his forehead and his every breath made his entire body shudder. It was pitiful. But maybe there was one thing he could try. It took more work for him than Sanji. "Turn around you dog. This is gonna hurt." Obediently he did as was told. Zoro got on his knees and inched forward. Pulling Sanji's pants the rest of the way down, he positioned himself and the thrust. There was a scream so loud it could be heard all the way across town. Zoro scowled. "You moron! Are you trying to get us caught! You bite your lip if someone tells you it's gonna hurt!" If he hadn't been in so much pain he'd have laughed. Zoro's cock was so large it was like having a tree branch shoved up his ass. He bit his lip now as Zoro pushed further into him, and then pulled out in a steady rhythm. After a few hard pushes Sanji felt himself moaning and leaning back into Zoro. It felt wonderful. His breath came in short quick spurts and it hurt. His eyes watered and his nails dug into the ground. God dammit, COME SANJI! And after that thought it was over. He came into the ground. Zoro grunted and came again, pulling out just before it went inside him. Panting, they both collapsed to the ground. They were quiet. When finally he'd caught his breath Zoro muttered, "What the hell?"

"I know, right?" Sanji replied, curling into a ball. His entire body ached and he felt feverish. But his mind swam in pleasure. That had been the best thing he'd felt in a long time. "Do you suppose this means we're bisexual?" The question hung in the air and Zoro let out a frustrated sigh.

"Of course not. This means nothing. We've just been on this damn ship so long with no women our minds were a little muddled is all. It was by time we got a little action."

Still in a ball, Sanji lit a cigarette. "You think? I don't think so. Either of us could have taken Nami but we didn't. Perhaps we've got a tiny bit of a feminine side to us." He let out a puff of smoke. "But perhaps. The only way we would truly know is if we tried with other men but ya' know, there aren't many out there who are... Willing." He started to laugh. "Imagine," he giggled, "trying to get that idiot to do it!" Confused for a second Zoro finally got it and burst out laughing too. They both laughed until they were nearly crying. "Anyway," he said, suddenly serious, "we should clean up. Those three should be back soon. He'll be hungry, she'll be tired and he'll probably be whining." Slowly he stood up and brushed the dirt off of his shirt. Damn. I need to change pants. He thought to himself. But I don't want to go. So instead of going, he yanked his pants up and buttoned them. Who cared if they were dirty? He could say he slipped and got some bird shit on him. And a little bit of flour. Zoro had stood up too. He'd also been manly enough to pull up his soaked pants. Then they stood awkwardly in silence. "I should probably start cooking right?" A nod. Sanji started walking towards the stove but was pulled back into a cobra tight hug. One of Zoro's hands was around his waist, and the other hung around his shoulder. "Nani?"

Zoro's lips touched his neck as he spoke, "I can't deny it. You're the only one I want. Stupid pride of a swordsman. No one hears about this okay?" Sanji nodded before craning his neck around to kiss Zoro's pale lips. Zoro let go and as Sanji walked forward, pinched him hard on the ass. Then he took a bucket of water and a brook and began to scrub the floor.