"Do you still love Naomi?" he asked, staring into my soul. No one has actually asked me that question since we broke up. I didn't want to answer but it was only because I didn't know what to say. Yes? No? I mean I have asked myself but I never really thought about it in detail. Now that the question was right in my face, I was confound.
"I dunno" I blurted out. Tai's face showed a hint of disappointment. I let out sigh before taking another sip. "What do you want me to say, man? I mean it's not like I haven't thought about it and trust me, I have. I just never really thought about it because I was afraid of what.. I'd realize". Tai nodded as a sign that he understood.
"Okay. This conversation is now strictly between you and me. So..". Well, I can't bottle this up in me. I will explode. And if I have to pour my heart out to someone, at least it will be Tai.
"My brain says Sora. I don't know why but it just says Sora, all the damn time. But my heart.. sometimes it says Sora and sometimes it says Naomi. Okay, maybe most of the time it says Naomi. But she's the mother of my child, Tai. Mother of my child! I just - I really don't know what to think". Tai gave me a sympathetic smile.
"I would say I understand but I don't. All I can say is, you should really think this through before you marry Sora".
"Thanks. dude. I really needed this".
"I could tell". I gave him an appreciative smile. Even after all the shit I put him through, he's still my best friend and I really appreciated that. I mean TK is my brother and I tell him almost everything but then again there are some things a guy has got to tell his best friend.
"Hey, I gotta go. This was really nice. Thanks again". We both got up and shared a man-hug. We parted and I waved goodbye. I had some meetings about my new album today.
I was walking towards this little cafe Matt and I love. It had the creamiest lattes (that were reasonably cheap) and the most delicious cakes. When I walked in, I bumped into someone. It was none other than Tai. We stood there awkwardly, just looking at each other. Mimi had informed me that Tai and Naomi have split. I felt bad for both of them but I guess never really had anything in common in the first place. "Hey" I said giving him a small smile. "Have coffee with me?". He looked reluctant but eventually nodded and went back in. After getting my coffee, I sat down with him. "Not getting anything?".
"Nope, just had some with Matt before you came in" he said.
"So, I heard about you and Naomi..." I started. He looked at me with serious eyes. If Matt and Naomi can make peace, so can Tai and I. "Tai, I'm really sorry about.. everything, okay?".
"Why'd you do it?" he asked suddenly.
"Do what?". I knew what he meant but I wanted to play dumb.
"You know what. Why, Sora? Why did you leave me?". I bit my lip. He deserves the truth.
"We were fighting a lot and I needed to get away. So one day, I bumped into Matt and we started hanging out again.. like old times. I felt so.. happy and at peace. Then we went for some beer a couple of times, got drunk and did some things we weren't suppose to do. Then after his bachelor party and he passed out at our place.. I just.. I couldn't resist. I booked to 2 tickets and we, well, left".
"But why on the wedding day?".
"It was the earliest flight I could get on short notice".
"Wow. Were you thinking about me or Naomi at all when you were planning this?". Guilty. I never thought about them or the consequences. I just thought we'd leave and live happily ever after.
"No, I didn't. It never occurred to me how it would affect people because I was in love".
"In love? So you're saying.. you were in love with Matt and not me?".
"I've always had feelings for Matt, okay! I just.. when Naomi came back, things were different and I started to get into you and.. I..".
"And you what?".
"I don't know! All I know is that Matt suddenly forgot he liked me and started liking Naomi so I decided to like you. And then...". I was on the verge of tears. I've never spilt my guts out like this for anyone.. ever. To Naomi or Mimi about Tai when we were in school maybe but not about everything. "Why did you ask me, Tai? Was it to make me feel terrible about marrying Matt?". He put his hands to his face and let out a sigh.
"If you'd ask me if I was going to marry you 2 years ago, I would've said hell yeah. I know our relationship sucked at that time but I thought it was just a phase and I believed we were gonna get through it. If I knew that 2 years later you would be marrying my best friend, I would've proposed sooner. I know you never pictured an us but I did. I will always want you in my life, Sora. But not like this". He got up and left. I was.. stunned. Never has a man poured out his feelings like that to me before. I never knew Tai cared so much. That's when it hit me. He still loves me.
"That sounds great. So, I'll email you some of my designs and you'll get back to me? Great. Thanks, bye". I hung up the phone and continued working. Working as a designer is kinda fun. I love looking at colors and fabrics then matching then with designs. The part that sucked is when people pressured you for ideas and new concepts but you learn to live with it. My phone began ringing and I picked up.
"Hello, Naomi Hashimoto speaking" I said into the phone.
"Naomi, it's Sora". I dropped the phone the moment I heard her name. I shook my head. Why is she calling me? I picked it up and put to my ear.
"Hi, Sora. Why'd you call?".
"I just - Can you meet me for lunch? At that little restaurant-cafe-place we used to always go to". I was gonna turn her down but I was tired of fighting with her.
"Yeah, that'd be great. See ya later".
"Bye". I hung up and I felt my heart race. What just happened?
I walked into the restaurant and spotted Sora at our table. Well, it was the table we always sat at whenever we came here. I made my way towards the table with my stomach feeling like it was about to explode. "Hi" I said timidly before sitting down. She gave me a small smile.
"Hi". The waiter came and gave us the menu. I ordered my usual. Grilled chicken with sweet potato fries and a diet coke. Sora ordered Ceasar salad and a glass of water.
"Watching your weight?".
"No, I'm just.. not that hungry. I had some coffee and cake before I got here".
"Oh. So, uh, how are the wedding preparations?".
"Haven't started. I'm starting to rethink about my wedding".
"I don't follow..". She looked me right in the eye. It was so intense.
"I thought I knew what I wanted to in life but turns out I didn't and I only realized that today. Naomi, you're my best friend and I hate myself for what I did to you. I hate that we're fighting and I want us to be friends again". Tears began falling from her eyes. I didn't want to fight anymore either and I miss having her around. More tears began to fall from her eyes. "I'm so sorry". I reached out and grabbed her hand.
"I forgive you, Sora". She let a few more tears fall before she grabbed a napkin and wiped them away.
"That's all I've wanted to hear since I got back". I gave her a bright smile which she returned.
"Why are you rethinking your wedding?".
"Because I think I still love Tai". Wow, there's a shocker. I was about to go all "you had to leave me and take my fiancee with you to realize you love Tai" but I didn't.
"Sora, are you sure?".
"I think I am. I had coffee with him today and he told me everything. It reminded me of why I loved him in the first place".
"I'm happy for you, no matter what you choose".
Later that day
I was at Matt's apartment, packing my things. I was going back to my mom's place. She needs me to help her out and I kinda need to leave anyways. I took the beautiful ring off my ring finger and put it back in the box. I heard the front door open and Matt's voice filled the apartment. "Sora? You home?" he called.
"Yeah, I'm in here" I said loudly. He came into our room and looked confused.
"Yeah, back to my mom's place. She needs some help".
"What's with the boxes? It looks like you're moving out". I walked up to him and looked him in the eye.
"You've been so good to me, Matt. Too good,actually. I know how you feel and I think we should.. end it".
"But Sora, we've been through so much".
"And we hurt so many people along the way. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life and I'm trying to fix them. Today I realized that it's not my destiny to marry you". I grabbed his hand and I opened up his plam. I placed the small black velvet box in his hand and closed it. "You should give it to someone who deserves it".
"But - ".
"I know you still love Naomi. With all of your heart because you never really stopped. You can never forget your first love, Matt. They'll always have some sort of affect on you and you'll always love them. And I know that you and Naomi were meant to be together. I should've never interfered and I'm sorry for that". He grabbed my shoulders and pulled me towards him. He kissed the top of my head.
"Thank you, Sora" he whispered as we pulled away. "Now, I know I can.. be free to love her again. I was always afraid of leaving you and how'd everyone would react to it".
"Well, now you've got nothing to worry about". We both let out a small chuckle.
The first time I broke it off with my fiancee, it was a mistake. The second time, it was a choice. Deep down in my heart, I knew I was suppose to spend the rest of my life with Naomi. I was sure of it and now I can. My family can now be complete. When I told my parents and TK that Yoshirou was my son, they all freaked out then they got mad at me then calmed down. Whenever I've got Yoshirou with me, I try to bring him to my parents' place to visit. Mom absolutely adores him, dad too. TK just can't believe he's got a nephew but loves him nonetheless. Finally! Things can be the way they were meant to be. I looked at the box in my hand and I knew exactly who it was for.
Double update :D I wrote 'em while I was in Australia (I had too much free time on my hands). I took as a perfect opportunity to update 'cause I know I will take forever.
So I hope you like it :) Again, thanks for all the support! I really appreciate it :)