This is a series of drabbles I wrote about a year ago. They cover from Bertie's birth up to about a year after his parents died.

Warning: beastly aunts, soppy females and a newt fancier
Disclaimer: Plum may have actually liked these, but as he did not write them, I am stating I did, but am making no money off of them.

"You can't really want to give him that name."

"I do, Daisy. Wilberforce has made me a rich man this afternoon."

"I will not name our son Wilberforce. What would we call him?"

"Wilber."

"That isn't amusing."

"It isn't supposed to be amusing. I mean it, Daisy. He was a long shot to win. But I had a feeling. You remember Edwin Wilberforce that I rowed with at Oxford? I was thinking of him this morning and then, by some stroke of providence there was a horse with the same name."

"It was a silly coincidence."

"Coincidence or not, it has made me a rich man. And when this son of ours arrives he will proudly carry the name Wilberforce."

"Suppose it's another girl."

"Nonsense. A healthy, strapping boy. With a strong name."

"I'm naming him Bertram, as we had already decided."

"Daisy-"

"Don't you 'Daisy' me. His name will be Bertram. If you absolutely insist upon it his second name can be Wilberforce. Though naming him after a horse is simply ridiculous."

"Bertram Wilberforce Wooster it is, then."